To start where I was before, no one knew me or my story, and now I've been on this never-ending rollarcoaster that has finally stopped and disassembled itself and now the conductor is happy it won't run anymore. To anyone this could be misconstrued as a ending to the final process of the emotional rollar coaster, but it is not. The point is: ( Read more... )

hunger hurts, but starving works, when it costs too much to love I'm losing pounds faster than before. Not eating just melts the fat away. The past 4 days (including today as day #4) I have barely eaten anything. It began on Thurs. night at 12:30 and the boys at bpys state began calling me and my andrenaline hs continued to pump until yesterday. ( Read more... )

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ummm ok?

I feel like being defiant and refusing to write anything about my week ( Read more... )

i have such a weird, sickly, gut-level feeling in my tummy. all the time. Hes at boys state this week, im coping ok with it, thinking about him a lot, but myself also. Friday he tried to break up w/ me, long story short: we are together and happy, but it emotionally wrecked me. I've never felt that awful in my whole life. too many tears and sobs ( Read more... )

Here I am over at Katie's apartment feeling content. For some reason I woke up at 7:30 this morning all refreshed even though I was super tired from yesterday getting up so early. I talked to Jen last night, she was supposed to call me after she washed her face, but she never did. oh well. Andrea has gone with her family up to DC to take Jennifer ( Read more... )

yes, it was a huge misunderstanding turned into psycho day. it was an after-school party-walk around the mall-thing and then take someone home....so around 5 i did get an answer from him...i felt really bad cause i wasted that time crying ..i hate being a girl. too many emotions. so he came over and my retarded parents had this huge thing to say ( Read more... )

yesterday was so aweosme and so wonderful and today has turned out completely terrible. I had to get up early to go to my tutor and then I come home abd screw myself over by eating ice cream so i got in a really bad mood b/c of no protein. now i"m sitting here waiting for him. I expected him at 12 and then at 1245 i called him and asked where he ( Read more... )

busy work day today. I worked from 2:30-8pm, but then I went over 45min. cause I screwed up the $. Luckily I don't work again till thursday, but then tomorrow I have to go to my tutor at 9am tomorrow...but besides work today was a happy day ( Read more... )

I am so sleepy!!!!! I'm here at Katie's apartment spending the night, Andrea is over here with me. Its been a really long day! Got up, did SAT's, then went to eat w/ me special boy who I miss right now, and then got stressed and ready to go to the Summit Graduation!!! Oh it was lovely....NOT. It was a big fat joke, only 1 graduate and they made it ( Read more... )