On Parenting: (jinzi on the care & feeding of your pet child.)

[lousy_timing]

You know, I just want people to stop having children as accessories and tax deductions. It isn't just what you're supposed to do. They require more work than marriage, and my marriage has two of the most demanding bosses I've ever met

Comments

[arielstarshadow]

The one thing my father told me that I actually felt was decent advice was:

If someone ios harassing you/doing something you don't like, ask them nicely to stop. If they don't listen, ask them nicely again. If they still don't listen, ask them one more time. After that, do what needs to be done, even if this means punching them in the nose.

I'm sure there are others who would disagree on that being good advice, but it's always seemed to work for me.

[lousy_timing]

Actually, I'd give my son that advice at this point, except that physical violence is grounds for suspension. Of course, harrassment is supposed to be, too

[purplkat]

I'm glad that the school is actually doing something. I have Stories about being tortured IN FRONT OF TEACHERS and having them do nothing.

By tortured, I mean hit in the head, hard, repeatedly, by different people. Directly in front of a teacher.

[arielstarshadow]

Well, that's a start. You know, sometimes I really hate how cruel kids can be to each other. :(

[jadecat]

Not to add so much as to merely say thank you. :) It's a good list, hopefully one I'll employ should I ever embark on parenthood.

I especially like 4) Hold them. Carriers are for cars and sleeping babies.

It's good.

[purplkat]

I have a suggestion! Do kids really need to scream? I don't mean like the occasional "Whee! I'm a kid and I'm REALLY involved in what I'm doing!" I mean like the couple of kids in my neighborhood who just scream, randomly, for long periods of time. Is that necessary? I honestly don't know, since I've never raised kids. Sam swears it's not, but I don't know if I trust him, since he grew up around so many kids that he's probably deaf anyway :P

[lousy_timing]

Kids, not babies, right?

No. It's going to happen sometimes, but there comes an age when you teach them that they need to make less noise. We have some of those children in our neighborhood, too. Some are twelve. They like to scream at 11:00 pee-EM.

[blooddrop]

Parent's need to include their children when they are making life changing decisions and not just "taken along for the ride" because the child, in the end, has no say. Such as divorce, moving in with a new significant other, etc.

Let your child know that you are proud of them. It will build their self-esteem. If you say nothing or just shrug or blandly say "that's nice, dear" they will think they do not matter or what they do does not count. this will have a lasting effect on their own image of self worth.

Those are really good, otherwise. I wish my mother had had that list. Along with the two I mention above.

[lousy_timing]

You're right- the child doesn't really get to choose. They can feel a lot better about it, though, if you talk with them about what's going on each step of the way and make them feel like a part of the decision-making process as much as possible. Get their opinions on new houses, ABSOLUTELY on new people that might move in to your home, for pity's sake, and think about what they said. It's amazing what hids will see that we sometimes miss

[renegade_geek]

I'm glad the school is taking some action, though be prepared for Cole to suffer a bit more as a result.

It's funny how little has changed over the years. All I can say is that I truly believe the shit I put up with at the hands of other children when I was young has helped to make me the compassionate, determined person I am today. MooseMan's a great kid, and he will survive this and all the turmult of his life, growing stronger as a results.

Besides people who never experience crap like this are just plain boring. They have no good sotries to swap over a beer.

[lousy_timing]

I'm glad the school's doing something, too. I'd like to think they would have regardless, and I am hoping it's not because they've learned that if they put it in place as a rule and it gets violated, I'll expect it to be followed, dammit, or call in the big guns if needed.

My feeling really is that the principal and teacher care. The more I work with them, the more I can see that.

[lousy_timing]

I don't want him to suffer any more because of it. He should NOT suffer any more because of it, since if that happens, he's pretty much being victimized again.

Hopefully, he'll survive it intact. There's no way to know for certain until he gets there. You're right about the stories, though! :)