Pulsatilla | Chapter 9/?
Pulsatilla
Author: love_cassiopeia
Summary: A complete mess was what Jung Yunho became after his beloved wife’s death. Trapped in a permanent state of isolation and loneliness, Yunho summons his knowledge on biology in hopes of recreating his wife in the form of an artificial human. However, the experiment goes terribly wrong and instead creates a male who has all his wife’s looks and qualities, one who he eventually decides to name ‘Jaejoong.’ Coping with the idyllic memories Jaejoong brings back of his wife, Yunho tries his best not to fall in love with his creation, knowing that the love he brings along is not the real thing-or is it?
Rated: PG-13 - NC-17
Warning(s): NC-17 material, language
Genre: Romance/Angst
Pairing(s): YunJae
Chapter 9: Rêve
Definition: The Pulsatilla is a deciduous perennial flower native to Europe and Asia that grows in the leftover nutrients of a dead plant. It is usually grown to replace another plant. It is capable of curing diseases and may be used in remedies.
r ê v e
*
His stomach was full, his body was far from being weary, and his house was exceptionally tidy. Out of all the things a man needed, Yunho classified these three as the most essential. Was it everything he wanted? Of course not, but if he took the time to push the onerous desires to the back of his mind, he would say that he was more than contended to live with such three simple elements.
His body and outer appearance wasn’t the problem. What was continuing to bother him was no other than the turbulent thoughts meandering around his head, wreaking havoc to his temper which had seemed so controlled just months ago. Never in his entire life had the scientist thought so much. Even at work and during projects, his mind felt relatively relaxed, having nothing more to do than to probe through his background knowledge to complete his workload. But now, with the additional add-on to his life that came in a supernal package simply called ‘Jaejoong,’ his mind felt as if it was running a marathon, having no idea where the finish line was.
His mind was drowning in an ambivalent puzzle-one side telling him to go one way while the other cautioned him to halt and run in the opposite direction. He was caught in a continuous deadlock with nothing concrete to fully hold onto. Regardless of how hard he tried, he understood such matters would forever continue to torture him and lead him into an endless labyrinth he could never escape from.
It was funny really, seeing how one boy could cause a grown man so much confusion and ambiguity. Yunho had no intention to feel defeated in any way-upon seeing his handsome face, anyone could perceive the thick ego behind the appearance. With Jaejoong around however, he felt himself letting loose and quitting the competition, allowing Jaejoong the power to cast any spell he wanted on him.
Well, that was the continuous cycle he had to practice time after time at home. At the office however, Yunho was forced to deal with more puzzling things-or should he say, suspicious things. Lee JoongYoung, the man he had recently battled against for a crucial project, had not shown up for a week at work. Considering the man had a project to finish and needed all the help he possibly could acquire, Yunho thought it was quite strange not having his competitor around. Alas, it wasn’t as if he was complaining or anything. In fact, it felt rather refreshing not having the bastard there to abase his self-esteem and pride.
Despite the loss of the project, work was still busier than ever. Yunho’s boss was a sadistic maniac (he really didn’t want to refer to his benefactor in such way, but decided there wasn’t a better word), sending loads and loads of work his way without any consideration of the life he had to live. With the mountains of assignments and research that needed to be done, Yunho at times considered leaving the job to search for one that didn’t require so much.
He couldn’t ask anyone else about the matter besides Jaejoong, who was always there to lend a set of ears whenever his life came crashing down. The boy told him his usual, encouraging phrases-“don’t give up, Yunho!”-“if you quit now, you will be putting all the research you did for the company behind you.” Hearing Jaejoong’s eloquent words, Yunho swallowed the thought of quitting and became resolute instantly, knowing the dark-haired beauty was always there to offer him what he could and more.
He had brought work home that night. In spite of it being a Friday and the fact that Jaejoong had stayed home all day long, Yunho chose to rest himself in the small office his penthouse provided, thinking that the sooner he got done with the work, the sooner he could meet his lips with Jaejoong’s. The first time their lips came in contact was nearly a week ago, yet it strangely seemed like it had just occurred yesterday. After the first few spontaneous pecks, Yunho exhorted himself to stop, reminding his hasty heart that Jaejoong was still someone who came close to being human-but obviously wasn’t one.
He scattered a pile of papers onto his desk and summoned his dark-blue ink pen, trying his hardest to focus as he turned his desk lamp on (which was the only source of light in the desolate office). The scientist then put on a pair of flattering glasses and glared down upon the millions of words laid out before him. Within minutes however, the words his eyes were glued to immediately morphed themselves into a vague image of the mysterious, beautiful, awe-inspiring Jaejoong.
What the hell is happening to me? Yunho asked himself as he forcibly took the pair of dark-rimmed glasses off his face, pushing the pile of papers away. What was he doing here, trying to focus, all the while being haunted by the man who existed behind the closed door? He felt so close yet so far away from him, and there was a fervent part of him that commanded him to extirpate the door and to abolish the bothersome distance so that not even one millimetre existed between them.
Why was he working solitarily in a dark office when he could be out there, exchanging kisses with Jaejoong’s succulent lips and heck, just looking at the beautiful boy? Why couldn’t he just put aside the things that appeared so vapid to him and focus on more complicated, intriguing gifts fate had brought to his doorstep?
As the current thought went unfinished, a knock was heard at the office door. Literally leaping off his seat, Yunho realized that it couldn't be anyone else but Jaejoong behind the door. With the constant thoughts that were plaguing his mind, he had no choice but to let him in.
“Come in.” Yunho invited gently, his hungry eyes pleased to see Jaejoong once again (it had been what-twenty minutes by himself and already, he was missing him?).
In Jaejoong’s hands appeared a small tray, containing the usual: strong espresso coffee with no sugar added and a plate of freshly sliced fruit. Since Yunho often worked deep into the night, Jaejoong reminded himself night after night to provide the working man with a bit of nourishment as his ‘energy-booster’ for the night.
Jaejoong placed the tray on a nearby counter, perusing over Yunho’s facial features to detect the unconditional confusion running through his mind. “Yunho-yah… is something wrong?” He asked nervously. “If you’re too tired, why don’t you just go to sleep for the night and do the work in the morning, when you’re well-rested and awake?”
Yunho shook his head, still marvelled at how tempting Jaejoong looked in the dim lights. He wanted a bite of him-just one. “It’s perfectly fine. If I finish all of this tonight, I can take you grocery shopping tomorrow.” He clarified. “And besides, with a little bit of caffeine and determination, I’m sure I can finish this all up and not have to worry about a single thing this weekend.”
“Are you sure?” Jaejoong questioned, unconvinced.
“I’m sure.”
Hearing Yunho’s declaration, the shorter male swiftly turned around, preparing to leave the room. The scientist, on the other hand, wasn’t extremely pleased with his decision. To be honest, Yunho wanted Jaejoong to stay in the room-to accompany him, to never leave his sight. As the boy prepared to leave the room, Yunho once again was struck with the solitude of being by himself without the fair beauty which made his every hair stand upright.
“Wait!”
Before Jaejoong had the chance to step foot outside the office, Yunho stood up from his office chair, walked over to the boy, and wrapped his strong arms ardently around the boy’s waist. Jaejoong was stunned by the sudden yet satisfying contact, and let out a silent whimper in response to Yunho’s rash actions. Driven by his lust, Yunho tightened his arms powerfully against the slender body, having no idea what he was doing, of course. Without hesitation, the taller man nailed the raven-haired boy to the closest wall and shut the door to his office-locking it (it did occur to him a few times that Jaejoong would resist, but alas, he was still familiar with Jaejoong’s burning desires and admiration for him). Having the boy completely to himself, Yunho impulsively kissed Jaejoong from lip to cheekbone to neck to collarbone. From his zealous response, the boy seemed to be enjoying the sensation quite a lot, especially when he ran his hungry fingers along the his slim abdomen and then along his ribs. The fiery sensation of being pressed against him was nearly killing Yunho, yet he felt that he couldn’t live on without more contact. The clothing that stood between them was making him go insane, so without any hesitation or regard for Jaejoong’s motives, he ripped open Jaejoong’s ivory button-up shirt, revealing a milky, firm surface he could finally lay his hands on.
Following Yunho’s actions, Jaejoong lifted Yunho’s shirt over his head in response, fully exposing the object of his fondness to his touch and vision. Although the sensation of both his naked skin pressing against Yunho’s felt relatively alien and unintelligible, Jaejoong knew that a trigger went off in his head as Yunho’s fingers wandered deeper across his body. He felt his whole abdomen tense up as Yunho’s long fingers reached the top of his groin, teasing the soft skin unremorsefully as they entered the material of his pants swiftly. Sliding his hands where he wanted, Yunho let his fingers grasp onto Jaejoong’s member-which as a matter of a fact, was unmistakably hardened. He ran his fingers gently along the core-perhaps too gently, considering the touch instantly made Jaejoong crave more. Yunho smirked as he heard Jaejoong whimper and moan in enjoyment, a clear sign that he desperately longed for this.
“Is this… really all right?” The shorter male asked between breaths. “Are you sure you want to do this to me… even though I don’t come close to being your wife?”
Yunho felt ridiculous, knowing that it was Jaejoong who should’ve been asked about whether he was certain or not. The mentioning of his wife also did much to ruin the environment, considering she wasn’t the one he wanted to have right now, Jaejoong was.
“Shut up.” Yunho commanded, his fingers speeding up as he gripped the core. “I don’t want to hear about my wife right now.”
Doing as he commanded, Jaejoong took his creator’s lips in his again, familiarizing himself with the erotic sensation that began to succumb him. Within a few moments, Yunho took the offensive and dropped Jaejoong’s pants and boxers, allowing the boy’s soft, cushion thighs to wrap around him as the two of them continued in a tumultuous fashion. Somewhere along the turbulence however, Jaejoong slowly began to understand a whole new emotion he never felt before-impatience.
The first night he had had sex, he couldn’t feel such a strange sensation at all. Surely he felt the sweet medley of pain and pleasure, but nothing of impatience. Nevertheless, tonight Jaejoong couldn’t stand another single second of waiting. His body ached, wishing to have Yunho within him as soon as possible. Perhaps that was what drove him to unbuckle Yunho’s belt, ridding the scientist of the irksome fabric so that the two of them were completely naked, ready for what was about to approach them.
Discovering that having Jaejoong nailed up against a wall wasn’t entirely comfortable for either of them, Yunho led the pale-skinned boy over to his desk where he carelessly removed all the papers from by swiping all of them onto the floor. Due to the impatience the two of them shared, Yunho couldn’t possibly bother to care about something so meaningless such as work.
He lifted Jaejoong onto the wooden desk so that he was seated facing him, all bare and ready for whatever Yunho intended to bring upon him. Although there was a large bed capable of staging love-making in the bedroom, the two of them were clearly too submersed in their current activities to notice such a room was within their reach. Instead, Yunho improvised, not putting much care into whether an office desk was an apt place to penetrate Jaejoong or not.
Lighted by the dim light, half of Jaejoong’s body was covered in shadows while the other was kissed by the light of the lamp. Scanning his inquisitive eyes over the contours of Jaejoong’s chest and abdomen, Yunho left hungry kisses upon Jaejoong’s exposed neckline and eventually travelled down to his collarbones where his kisses became mere licks. Jaejoong’s soft, silky lips let out a muffled groan as Yunho’s tongue met his erect nipple, nibbling at it lightly. Although his body wasn’t quite ready for the sensation, he found it rather irresistible how Yunho could make him feel so loved and wanted. For the first time in his life, Jaejoong actually felt that someone desired him-in more ways than one.
Deciding to approach Jaejoong slowly, Yunho’s long muscular fingers left a caress on Jaejoong’s groin and then proceeded to his pulsating member. After a few minutes of toying with his erect manhood and hearing a few more melodic, pitchy whimpers from his partner, Yunho slid a finger into Jaejoong’s opening mindlessly. Hearing his cry and feeling his body tense up in discomfort. Yunho decided to slide the second finger in slowly, hoping Jaejoong wouldn’t experience such a pungent pain. What he didn’t know was, when he slid the second finger through Jaejoong’s rigid opening, the lethargic speed at which he did it intensified the pain. Despite the pain and the aching uneasiness that hit his body, Jaejoong knew that he needed to be ready for what was to come next. Besides, he had done this once before. The last time, the man he met at the nightclub ruthlessly penetrated him without appreciating his body for what it was-it was almost as if the man had been too eager for self-gratification. Yunho, on the other hand, proceeded him much gentler despite the lust and impatience seen within his eyes. Yunho, on the other hand, wanted to express his love by doing this.
Jaejoong threw his head back in pleasure as Yunho’s two fingers made a scissoring move inside him-stretching him, preparing him. As he slid his tainted fingers out, Yunho brought his waist up to the front of the desk, placed his palms on Jaejoong’s porcelain thighs, and moved his member into Jaejoong’s swift opening, penetrating the boy rapidly.
“Yun…ho…” Jaejoong mumbled his creator's name in a nearly inaudible tone as the taller man moved inside him, discovering the various sensations and regions inside Jaejoong’s treasured body. With each thrust and each snap of his hips, Jaejoong felt a completely new sensation amongst them. Trying to abstain himself from losing his sanity to the overwhelming pleasure and pain that moved inside him, the boy wrapped his arms around the scientist’s shoulders, holding him as close to his body as possible. He then returned to his activity of gasping and crying out redundantly as Yunho’s member hit a few sensitive spots within him.
Still moving continuously inside him, Yunho quelled Jaejoong onto the desk until his back met the cold hard wood of the desk. Entangling his lengthy fingers within Jaejoong’s midnight-black hair, Yunho captured the boy’s rosy lips in his ravenously, tasting every corner along with every patch of sweetness within the supple velvet. Jaejoong closed his eyes and manoeuvred his lips around Yunho’s, trying to both taste the sweetness on his tongue and to feel the sweetness that moved inside him. For a second there, Jaejoong’s mind literally went entirely blank, overwhelmed by the two presents Yunho had given that were so similar yet so different.
Discovering that it was the right time, Yunho reached his climax and spilled his love into Jaejoong, who gasped loudly and threw his head back in indulgence. After exiting Jaejoong’s body, Yunho laid himself fully upon Jaejoong, wanting to caress every part of him as the amount of kisses multiplied.
“I love you, Jaejoong.” were the words Jaejoong thought he had heard as their lips mingled for a while longer. Although he found it extremely difficult to breathe, Jaejoong was determined to allow his lips to remain with Yunho's for a few seconds longer, knowing that losing every ounce of breath was worth the magical action.
Having Yunho say ‘I love you’ was like finally finding a key that unlocked the dusty door to his heart. After all the months he’d waited, after all the meals he'd cooked, after all the pain he'd felt and all the uncertainty he was forced to cope with, Jaejoong was at long last allowed access into Yunho’s enrapturing heart-one that was now presented generously before him.
He wanted to cry, for tears of joy were lurking deeply within his glassy eyes. He wanted to banter himself, knowing that after all of his indecisive doubts, it finally turned out Yunho truly loved him and much less-wanted him.
As their kiss concluded swiftly, Jaejoong was awarded with the opportunity of gazing into Yunho’s vivid pupils, seeing his reflection within the shining surface. Without hesitation, the two of them burst out into a childish laughter, realizing that they had just made love on the most unconventional place in the entire penthouse. Yunho’s gentle fingers tickled Jaejoong’s naked ribs and made his smile triple in size. Discovering that they had made a complete mess, the two of them continued to chuckle uncontrollably-part in bliss, another in embarrassment.
Experiencing this with Yunho certainly replayed a few elements of his night with the stranger he had met at the nightclub. However, after feeling as confident as he did right now, Jaejoong considered that perhaps Yunho had powers others didn’t-a magic touch.
If Yunho was really magical, then Jaejoong was certain that he had performed an authoritative yet beautiful spell on him tonight. If Jaejoong wasn’t human before, after being loved by Yunho, he was. If he wasn’t Yunho’s wife (or husband) before, after being loved by Yunho, he suddenly was.
And as he lay there, gazing into Yunho’s chocolate pupils while residing on an office desk, Jaejoong realized that perhaps life wasn't so difficult after all.
A tumultuous sound of footsteps filled his ears-a sign that someone was running, or how he felt it: escaping. It was bothering him without end, sending his thoughts into a deep abyss as the footsteps became louder. He could also hear a continuous, muffled breathing, inundated by a faint whimper that was almost too heartbreaking to listen to. He could feel a cool liquid slide down his cheeks, one which felt extremely alike to tears. Within a few moments, Jaejoong realized that the footsteps were his, the soft whimpering was his, and the thousands of tears plummeting at the speed of light were his.
Suddenly, his vision began to return to him, making him aware of his surroundings and intensifying the emotions that rang like an irksome church bell inside him. He could make out a dusty staircase, once which looked exceptionally familiar. Without much thinking at all, he noticed that he was the one tumbling down the flight of stairs, tears on his face and a painful tightening in his chest.
Just where the hell was he? What was he running away from, and what was causing the tears to flow nonstop down his face? Although he had never once fled down a flight of stairs so quickly his entire life, why did this seem so familiar-like he had gone through this before?
As he continued to skip through the flight of stairs deliriously, he could hear a familiar voice call out his name. He recognized the tone of the voice, the roaring melody it possessed. The voice that was calling after him, cautioning him to stop was his lover’s.
He tried his hardest to perceive what was happening, but alas, he was too blinded by his tears and too focused on his running to pay any attention to the man behind him. He felt an uproar of aggravation rise up within him-a surprise, considering he was usually overjoyed to hear his lover’s voice, calling out his name. This time however, he tried his hardest to run away from his lover, terrified that he would fall into a thousand fragments if he looked back and caught a glimpse of that unforgettable face.
Within no time at all, he reached the bottom of the flight of stairs, approaching the exit of the apartment complex as the tears continued to reappear. Once out of the apartment, he was immediately drenched in rain, still running as he tried to perceive his surroundings washed over by an invulnerable darkness.
He felt quite relieved actually, being out of the penthouse-away from the love of his life that labelled himself ‘Yunho.’ He still couldn’t grasp onto a solid emotion however, mainly because his mind was currently in a state of high turbulence and disaster.
A part of him cautioned himself to stop as he ran recklessly into the streets. The rain had made the ground extremely slippery, causing him to fall accidentally onto the damp roads. His tears were still on his face as he tried to lift himself up-but it was no use, he couldn’t feel anything anymore.
He saw a storage truck on the road, its bright lights nearly blinding him as its redundant honking deafened his ears. It was headed his way rapidly, looking like it was ready to crush his bones and smear his flesh onto the damp road.
And that’s just what it did.
The only thing he could think about as the truck hit him mercilessly was a man by the name of Jung Yunho.
His eyes flew open to reveal a dark bedroom, a comforting mattress, and an attractive partner lying beside him. For a second there, Jaejoong thought he had died-being crushed by the malicious storage truck, losing everything he had worked so hard to obtain along the way.
Fortunately, the whole scenario had been a dream (or a nightmare, rather).
Returning to reality, Jaejoong reminded himself of the incidents that occurred within the past few hours. He had just finished enjoying a night with Yunho, following him to bed after a swift shower. And here he was, resting within his muscular arms, so far away from where he was in his dreams.
He left a gentle kiss on Yunho’s forehead. “I will never let that happen.” He whispered, not intending to be heard.
Nonetheless, as he fell back onto his pillow and closed his eyes, the same frightening scene continued to replay before him, eating away at his emotions.
Just why did everything feel so damn familiar? Jaejoong asked himself as he closed his eyes, struggling to fall asleep.
I apologize once again for being so late. I don’t think many people have been reading this fic lately, so in a way, I lost a bit of determination. Regardless, I’m going to try to put up a chapter every week. Hopefully I won’t lose any more readers D=
Thank you for the people who have been staying with me, I really appreciate it.
Please comment.
-Cindy
R é s u l t a t | A l i é n é | D é s o l é | B a i g n o i r e | M u s i q u e | N o c t u r n e 1 | N o c t u r n e 2 | J a l o u x | P e s a n t e u r 1 | P e s a n t e u r 2 | r ê v e
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