fic: Never Gets Easier (Girl!Frank/Gerard)
I wrote comment fic for stereomer's UST meme. It's set in turnyourankle's fabulous Sailing On A Sunrise universe (GO READ THAT NAOW).
GIRL!FRANK/GERARD
TITLE: Never Gets Easier
SUMMARY: After everything, Gerard finds himself missing her the most.
A/N: Set during the filming of I'm Not Okay.
She's sitting in the high school cafeteria in a pleated skirt and kneesocks, playing with the arrowheaded end of her tie. A borrowed look on her, but it doesn't mean Gerard's stomach isn't clenching knowingly when he sees her like this.
Bob's gone somewhere, and Mikey and Ray, and it's a rare occasion these days to see Frankie completely alone, and Gerard hesitates before he walks up to her.
"I thought filming a motherfucking music video would mean a little less waiting and a little more getting things done," he says as a greeting, making her jump out of her thoughts, head snapping up and eyes following him as he sits down next to her -- a little too far away for it to feel completely familiar, still too close for him to keep her presence from breaking him apart.
Her eyes dart towards the empty doorway before she shrugs, says, "I was just trying not to fall asleep. It's been kind of-" she pauses, and he swallows reflexively.
"Yeah. Yeah, it has."
Gerard thinks for a while, about the mess that he made of their lives, about August and July, Summer Sonic and how her face had looked when she said I can't do this anymore.
"Don't," she says like she's reading his mind -- she probably is, or something close to it anyway -- so he nods, tucking his jaw into his collarbone.
"I feel like a motherfucking babe in these clothes," she says after a while, cracking a smile. She swings her leg -- the one she's not sitting on -- and Gerard thinks he would be able to see the small tattoo on her thigh if her skirt was just a little bit shorter or if the hem was folded differently.
He says, "You fucking look like one!" and doesn't think about how she would sound like, taste like, if he was still allowed to lick the command on her thigh -- live each day as if it were your last -- trace his fingers along the softness of her skin.
They finally get to filming again after what feels like years of idleness and bad spirits. Mikey's glaring at Frankie, has been since he found them sitting quietly together in the cafeteria, afternoon light making shapes on wide, cream-colored walls.
She hasn't done anything wrong, but it's not like Gerard can blame Mikey for acting this way. He's only being a good brother. And it had been Gerard who had requested Mikey to keep Frankie away from him not wanting her to have to deal with any of his shit anymore, giving her an easy way out. But he's feeling selfish today, wants to be the one that makes Frankie let out obnoxious sounds when she giggles, wants to pretend that everything's back to normal again, like he could grab Frankie around the waist and spin her around, laugh into the hollow of her cheek and smell her hair.
"Come on," Marc Webb is saying to the group of high school students, boys and girls scattered all around the library. "I want you all to just have a good time now. When you start hearing music, you grab your partner and start dancing, okay? You know how it goes."
The kids nod and turn to face each other. Gerard watches Frankie watching the scene. There's a cigarette pushed behind her ear and she smiles crookedly when the music starts and the kids melt into a stiff, awkward hybrid of waltz and a bunch of other styles Gerard's had to suffer through in high school PE what feels like a light year ago.
Bob's watching Frankie too, smiling gently, and when Gerard thinks the guy's about ready to walk up to her, and Webb's yelling cut! cut! y'all look like a bunch of farm animals! in the background, Gerard grabs Frankie's hand, tugging her to his chest, and starts spinning her around.
She yelps, struggling for a while but Gerard can't let go. Not now. "Let's show 'em how it's done," he says quietly and feels her relaxing, loosening her grip on Gerard's arm, moving her hand up to rest on his shoulder.
"I can't believe you just said that," she says, rolling her eyes, cramming her fingers inside of Gerard's collar, gripping the fabric hard when he practically lifts her up in a fast spin.
"Yes, yes!" Webb's yelling, waving his arms around and at the kids, "Come on, everyone! Start dancing again! Keep filming!"
Gerard tries not to shiver as Frankie's blunt nails scrape the side of his neck, and when they finally pull apart, her face is flushed and she's smiling with her whole face, eyes and everything.
Gerard glances at Bob, flashing him a faked smile, pretending not to feel cold and alone when Frankie gambols towards the couch, landing ungracefully next to a frowning Mikey, pressing her ear into the ball of his shoulder and smiling still.
GIRL!FRANK/GERARD
TITLE: Never Gets Easier
SUMMARY: After everything, Gerard finds himself missing her the most.
A/N: Set during the filming of I'm Not Okay.
She's sitting in the high school cafeteria in a pleated skirt and kneesocks, playing with the arrowheaded end of her tie. A borrowed look on her, but it doesn't mean Gerard's stomach isn't clenching knowingly when he sees her like this.
Bob's gone somewhere, and Mikey and Ray, and it's a rare occasion these days to see Frankie completely alone, and Gerard hesitates before he walks up to her.
"I thought filming a motherfucking music video would mean a little less waiting and a little more getting things done," he says as a greeting, making her jump out of her thoughts, head snapping up and eyes following him as he sits down next to her -- a little too far away for it to feel completely familiar, still too close for him to keep her presence from breaking him apart.
Her eyes dart towards the empty doorway before she shrugs, says, "I was just trying not to fall asleep. It's been kind of-" she pauses, and he swallows reflexively.
"Yeah. Yeah, it has."
Gerard thinks for a while, about the mess that he made of their lives, about August and July, Summer Sonic and how her face had looked when she said I can't do this anymore.
"Don't," she says like she's reading his mind -- she probably is, or something close to it anyway -- so he nods, tucking his jaw into his collarbone.
"I feel like a motherfucking babe in these clothes," she says after a while, cracking a smile. She swings her leg -- the one she's not sitting on -- and Gerard thinks he would be able to see the small tattoo on her thigh if her skirt was just a little bit shorter or if the hem was folded differently.
He says, "You fucking look like one!" and doesn't think about how she would sound like, taste like, if he was still allowed to lick the command on her thigh -- live each day as if it were your last -- trace his fingers along the softness of her skin.
They finally get to filming again after what feels like years of idleness and bad spirits. Mikey's glaring at Frankie, has been since he found them sitting quietly together in the cafeteria, afternoon light making shapes on wide, cream-colored walls.
She hasn't done anything wrong, but it's not like Gerard can blame Mikey for acting this way. He's only being a good brother. And it had been Gerard who had requested Mikey to keep Frankie away from him not wanting her to have to deal with any of his shit anymore, giving her an easy way out. But he's feeling selfish today, wants to be the one that makes Frankie let out obnoxious sounds when she giggles, wants to pretend that everything's back to normal again, like he could grab Frankie around the waist and spin her around, laugh into the hollow of her cheek and smell her hair.
"Come on," Marc Webb is saying to the group of high school students, boys and girls scattered all around the library. "I want you all to just have a good time now. When you start hearing music, you grab your partner and start dancing, okay? You know how it goes."
The kids nod and turn to face each other. Gerard watches Frankie watching the scene. There's a cigarette pushed behind her ear and she smiles crookedly when the music starts and the kids melt into a stiff, awkward hybrid of waltz and a bunch of other styles Gerard's had to suffer through in high school PE what feels like a light year ago.
Bob's watching Frankie too, smiling gently, and when Gerard thinks the guy's about ready to walk up to her, and Webb's yelling cut! cut! y'all look like a bunch of farm animals! in the background, Gerard grabs Frankie's hand, tugging her to his chest, and starts spinning her around.
She yelps, struggling for a while but Gerard can't let go. Not now. "Let's show 'em how it's done," he says quietly and feels her relaxing, loosening her grip on Gerard's arm, moving her hand up to rest on his shoulder.
"I can't believe you just said that," she says, rolling her eyes, cramming her fingers inside of Gerard's collar, gripping the fabric hard when he practically lifts her up in a fast spin.
"Yes, yes!" Webb's yelling, waving his arms around and at the kids, "Come on, everyone! Start dancing again! Keep filming!"
Gerard tries not to shiver as Frankie's blunt nails scrape the side of his neck, and when they finally pull apart, her face is flushed and she's smiling with her whole face, eyes and everything.
Gerard glances at Bob, flashing him a faked smile, pretending not to feel cold and alone when Frankie gambols towards the couch, landing ungracefully next to a frowning Mikey, pressing her ear into the ball of his shoulder and smiling still.