Pebble Cottage
Title: Pebble Cottage
Pairing: Yoosu
Genre: Crack
Rating: PG
“Tell ussss~!!!!” “It can’t have been THAT bad, you two seemed happy enough to wake us all up last night.” Accused Changmin, joining in with Yunho.
“How did we…” cutting short as a rush of blush spread across his face. “Sorry about that…”
“I couldn’t sleep AT ALL.” Jaejoong always was one to over emphasise everything. Truth being that he hadn’t heard a thing, not even an earthquake could wake him up from his ‘beauty sleep’.
“Okay okay, well…Once upon a time OW” Three pillows had simultaneously hit him in the face.
“Fine…”
ㅡXㅡ
“Will you tell me what’s going on?” Yoochun pleaded, jabbing his boyfriend in the ribs. It was 5am and he’d been hauled out of bed in his pyjamas and pushed into the car. Being woken up this early normally meant sex, but Junsu wasn’t naked, and they’d never done it in the car before…
“It’s a surprise okay? Just rest your pretty little head and I’ll wake you up when we get there.”
“Can I at least have a clue?…you’re not going to kill me are you? If it’s about those cds I SWEAR it was all Jaejoong…” giving Junsu a sweet smile.
“What cds?…Whatever, you’re always going on about wanting some time to ourselves, so I’m taking you somewhere beautiful. Okay? Now sleep! It‘s gonna be a long drive.” Waving his hand in front of Yoochun’s face, mocking a hypnotist’s actions.
He didn’t need much persuasion and fell straight asleep. Yoochun wasn’t the most graceful sleeper, within minutes the car was filled with sounds of his sleep-talk. “Oh Su…” “HANDS OFF MY BOXERS” “It’s my turn to go ont…zzzzzz”
ㅡXㅡ
“Yoochun…Yoochun wake up… ATTENTION SOLDIER, THIS IS NOT A DRILL. Oh hey sweetie! We‘ve arrived.”
“Arrived…where the fuck are we?” By now he’d spotted the old cottage and barn. Surely this couldn’t be the “somewhere beautiful”…right? It was dark again by the time they’d arrived, and all he could make out was an old barn and a worn down house.
"This is a joke...right? Junsu?!" He questioned, looking at the other man as they both stepped out the car.
"Hey! Okay sure it looked much better in the brochure… But how was I supposed to know? It said scenic!!"
"Well enjoy the fucking scenery…"
Turning his back on Junsu, Yoochun walked to the front door, gracefully dodging cowpats and buckets that had been strewn across the yard.
“Oi, have you read this?!” shoving the note in the other man’s face. “This is worse than killing me…”
“Welcome Mr and Mrs Junsu!
My husband and I have been called out on an emergency and won‘t be here for a while.
If you need any help, George next door should be able to give you a hand.
(Be careful though, he’s a bit grumpy sometimes…)
There’s eggs and milk in the barn and some food in the fridge.
Enjoy your stay at Pebble Cottage!!”
ㅡXㅡ
After kicking the door down and propping it back up with a bucket just in case “George thinks we’re burglars” They’d eventually got into bed.
“Maybe it’ll look better in the morning…” Slipping his arms around the noticeably pissed off Yoochun lying beside him.
“it better, or no sex, ever again.” he replied, making a sound like a child about to have a tantrum.
It was an empty threat, but Junsu didn’t want to chance it. Once when he wore Chun’s favourite boxers and stretched the seat out, Yoochun had made him wear thongs for a fortnight. He’s still not sure if it was more his punishment or for Yoochun’s obvious enjoyment. For the whole 2 weeks, he’d be constantly having to pick stuff up from the floor which his other half had “dropped”, therefore revealing his underwear and leaving his face with more than just a hint of redness.
“Come on Yoochun baby,” places soft kisses on his shoulder and slipping his hand inside his lover‘s boxers. “How ‘bouts I make it up to you? Hmmm? I‘m really…really sorry”
Soon the night air was filled with more than just sounds of cows mooing.
ㅡXㅡ
Junsu opened his eyes slowly, half blinded by the sun, he rolled over to a half empty bed.
“Yoochun?” Pulling on his boxers, he got up and went to investigate downstairs, surely his boyfriend must be here somewhere.
Arriving at the kitchen, the calm morning was soon interrupted by loud crashing sounds and a familiar voice coming from outside.
“AHH YOU FUCKING…get back here!!!” “Hereeeee moo moo! Nice moo moo, now just stay there….” “WE NEED BACK UP IN HERE MAN!”
After 10 minutes of banging, laughing and extremely loud mooing, Yoochun appeared at the doorway, looking rather like he’d been in a fight with a sumo wrestler. And lost.
“What the hell happened to you?” Wondering over to the sumo victim and pulling hay out of his hair.
“I got you some milk” Grinning cheerily and producing half a glass of milk. Even with the stench of manure, Yoochun still managed to look cute.
“Is that it?” Jokingly holding up the glass for inspection, it was barely enough for one.
“Why don’t you try it then?” Turning his back on Junsu and picking the remaining hay out of his hair. “Me and Matilda just had a minor disagreement…”
“You NAMED it?”
“She has beautiful eyes…”
Junsu gave him a calm smile and set the glass on the table. “Tell you what, I’ll continue making breakfast” eyeing up the burnt toast protruding from the toaster. “You go and have a shower okay? Now, where’s the eggs?”
Yoochun pointed towards the barn and continued on his way up the stairs, taking his shirt off as he ascended.
“Are you serious?”
“Of course, just stay away from Matilda. I think she has it in for us…”
With a long sigh, Junsu took the toast from the toaster and looked in the fridge. “Butter…cheese…oh great, my mission for eggs it is then.”
ㅡXㅡ
The barn was huge, filled with cows, pigs, sheep and at the far corner, a group of chickens.
“Here goes nothing I guess…” making his way to the rear of the barn. “hey chickens…” calmly reaching his hand forward, only to be pecked by 3 different hens “OWWW!! Gahhh, so that’s how you’re gonna play huh?!” he shouted, rolling up his sleeves.
Yoochun was sitting at the kitchen table, fresh out of the shower and nibbling on some fresh toast when Junsu came back.
He couldn’t stifle his laughter when he saw the other man standing in front of him covered in feathers and broken egg shells.
“Not as easy as you think is it?” He exclaimed, nearly falling off the stool from laughter.
Junsu calmly placed 4 eggs on the kitchen table and gave Yoochun a fierce look. “Just…shut up” making his way up the stairs, this wasn’t the holiday he’d planned. At all.
“Guess I’m making breakfast after all then…” Yoochun said, donning a flowery apron.
After a while, he could hear Junsu padding down the stairs.
“Yoochun! What the hell is that smell?” Seating himself on an empty stool before covering his mouth and nose with his hand.
“It wasn’t me!! Or my cooking, so don’t even try it.” he said whilst pouting, then continued serving their eggs and toast.
“Well it wasn’t me either, I’ve just had a shower. Maybe it was Matilda?” He said jokily before being whipped with a kitchen towel.
“Oiii, leave her outta this!”
ㅡXㅡ
After cleaning the mess they’d made and leaving a note, explaining that “unforeseen circumstances” had broke the door, they packed their bags and got in the car to go home.
“Well that was…interesting” Yoochun said, leaning back and propping his pillow against the window.
Within seconds he’d already fell asleep, missing Junsu’s reply, leaving the other man to entertain himself on the long drive home.
“Old McDonald had a farm. E-I-E-I-O…”
ㅡXㅡ
“Oh, my, god. JUNSU MAN!” Changmin shouted, flinging his pillow in Junsu’s direction. “Poor Yoochun.”
“What do you mean poor Yoochun?! He enjoyed it. My plan went perfectly..”
“What plan?!” Biting back, and jabbing the other man in the ribs with his fingers. “You said it would be beautiful Su! It smelt bad and the bed was uncomfortable.”
“Heeeyy!! The thought counts anyway! Besides, Junsu was attacked by chickens.” Yunho chipped in whilst adorning a cheeky grin, trying to defend his friend’s honour.
“That’s nothing! Chun had to molest a cow for milk!” Jaejoong joked, he’d found the whole story hilarious.
Yoochun rested his head on Junsu‘s shoulder and sighed softly. “…I miss Matilda.”