Look At Me
Title:Look At Me
Genre:Fluff.Romance.Light angst
Couple:Sekai. side Baeksoo
Summery: Jongin always looked at him carefully, in hopes of finding something he always wanted.
Jongin looked at the boy sleeping peacefully on the desk beside him. Most of the other students in class were doing the same, sleeping. It was History class afterall. Jongin would normally listen or he would doodle on his book when bored but nowadays he preferred Sehun to a lot of things. He was still pondering if he should tell the other about it but he hasn’t been strong enough to do so.
He had decided on confessing to Sehun before but there were three reasons stopping him: 1. Interruption by their friends 2.Sehun saying something that made Jongin say something else and the last one which happened more was Jongin freezing on the last minute, not saying anything, making Baekhyun and Kyungsoo sigh sadly by the side, “Why don’t you just blurt it out like in those dramas you always watch?” Baekhyun would say afterward when they are sitting in class
“I don’t watch dramas!” Jongin would glare at him, a pretty blush adoring his cheeks, “… and what if he doesn’t like me back? I would just ruin our friendship…”
And with that said Baekhyun would sigh again, he couldn’t tell Jongin how Sehun’s eyes would lit up when Jongin entered the room and how he would glare at Taemin every time he danced a little too close to Jongin. He couldn’t tell him because he wouldn’t even believe Baekhyun’s words and would think of it as a way to get him to confess.
Jongin was the best in reading Sehun’s expressions, but sometimes even he couldn’t understand what the other felt. Sehun had a way of showing whichever emotion he wanted the others see. If he didn’t want them know what he felt, his expression would go blank. Jongin has tried, he had searched for the emotions he wanted to see many times but he never found them. After all these years, he couldn’t really hope to see them either.
“YAH… wake up. It’s lunch time!”
Jongin was shaken from his thoughts by Baekhyuns loud voice shouting in Sehun’s ear, shaking him wildly. Sehun groaned and swatted Baekhyun but Jongin could see him opening his eyes slowly. Jongin looked at them amused by their actions, but his attention was taken away from them when a hand landed on his shoulder. He turned to see Tao , a friend of Sehun, smiling down at him, he returned the smile “ Hey Tao what’s up?”
“Jongin-ah I was wondering if you’d like to go to the carnival this Saturday, I heard they are having a special dance show only on this weekend!” Tao said rubbing the back of his neck nervously.
Jongin gave him a half smile and took a quick glance at Sehun but he was still busy bickering with Baekhyun. Jongin fisted his hand and faced Tao, “I’d love to go with you!” He said loudly. Tao beamed at him and told him that he would pick him up the next day. Jongin knew it wasn’t nice to give him false hope but he couldn’t help it. A plan was already forming in his head, he was going to go on and on about the date in front of Sehun and see his reaction. If he didn’t do anything, Jongin was going to move on. He wasn’t going to wait for eternity, he had feelings and it felt nice to feel wanted.
“Ow…” Jongin winced when Kyungsoo flicked his forehead,
“What was all that about?” He said, knowing Jongin too well that he already could say what was going on in his head.
Jongin shrugged “I can’t just sit around and wait for him forever!”
“But first you should move on, before going out with someone else!”
“He doesn’t know that so he could help me move on!”
“You don’t even want to move on!” Kyungsoo said sarcastically
“Whatever!” Jongin mumbled and began to gather his books. He pulled his lunch box out and strolled toward the cafeteria with Kyungsoo, not waiting for Baekhyun and Sehun.
“Let’s go out tomorrow …” Baekhyun cheered from his place in front of Jongin, “Since we’ve just gone through the exams, let’s go have fun. Karaoke, amusement park, carnival, we could go anywhere.”
As the other three started to discuss their plans for the next day, Jongin decided to stay silent and eat his food.
“Hey Jongin-ah why are you not saying anything? You are usually the eager one for these things.”
Jongin just shrugged “Sorry. I can’t come along with you guys, I have other plans.”
Baekhyun frowned “ What plans?”
“He is going on a date!” Kyungsoo replied instead of Jongin
Baekhyun’s eyes widened while Sehun’s didn’t even raise his head and just continued on eating his food. Jongin looked at him sadly.
“What are you saying? He is lying right?” Baekhyun asked loudly
Jongin nodded “ He isn’t. I’m going on a date. With Zitao.” He said not taking his eyes off of Sehun, desperately looking for something, anything that meant Sehun isn’t incurious about all this dating but to his disappointment, there was no reaction.
“What? But you don’t_”
Jongin interrupted him “ I agreed to go because I wanted to, so don’t try to make me change my decision!” and with that said, the discussion ended and Kyungsoo changed the subject to their plans for their outing.
Going home in silence wasn’t something usual for them. Jongin and Sehun would normally be seen playing and joking around, full of joy and laughter on their way; putting a smile on their neighbors faces with their cheerful behavior but this time none of that was happening. Thoughts of breaking the silence was running through their mind but this time they didn’t know what to say.
The sky was dark before they knew it and like every night, Sehun was sitting in his room’s balcony waiting for Jongin to come out of his room to talk. After waiting for half an hour, he was going to go back inside -it was cold even for him who liked cold weather- when he heard the other house balcony door open. “Hey..” Sehun said softly, looking at the other side as Jongin sat on a chair.
After a moment of silence, Jongin spoke up “So what is tonight’s subject?” they didn’t really chose subjects for their nightly chats, they didn’t need any as they just started to talk about anything in their mind but today it seemed difficult to talk to other.
“Do you like Zitao?” Sehun suddenly asked, shocking Jongin
“What are yo_”
“Do you?” Sehun insisted on his question
Jongin sighed and looked down “ I don’t know..”
“Then why are you going out with him?” Sehun asked looking at Jongin with serious eyes
“You say that like he is already my boyfriend!” Jongin exclaimed but then continued in a soft tone “ and it’s my first time going out with someone… no one has really wanted me until now. I just want to try I guess.”
“ Are you crazy? A lot of people want to be with you!” Sehun protested
Jongin glared at him “ yeah but after you chased them away, everyone thinks I’m dating you so they don’t dare come close to me!”
“Then let’s da_ Sorry.” Sehun said and mentally scolded himself for his slipup.
“But you aren’t bad mouthing Tao so you must approve of him huh?” Jongin said quietly
“I guess. He is my friend after all.”
After a few minutes in silence, Jongin sighed heavily and stood up “ I should go back. I don’t want to be sleepy tomorrow. Good night!” going in without waiting for Sehun’s response
Sehun looked at the other as he went in “ First date? Is there going to be second one? …. You are an idiot Oh Sehun.”
Jongin was nervous, he has been nervous around Tao since he saw him so he didn’t think anything of it. Tao just had an aura that scared him and made him nervous. He wasn’t afraid of him now that he knew his personality but the nervousness never went away. But Tao always treated him well and Jongin didn’t want leave a bad impression now that he has accepted him. So unlike what he has decided, he wore something nice and waited for Tao.
He was watching some random drama when the door bell rang. He stood up and was ready to run toward the door before anyone else (his mom) did but to his horror, his mom was already at the door greeting the other boy. He heard Tao greeting formally “Hello Mrs. Kim I’m Zitao.”
“Ahh Hi Zitao! What brings you here?” She answered rather cheerfully, ignoring Tao’s fidgeting
“ Umm, I’m here to pick Jongin up. We’re going to the carnival.” He said nervously
“Oh the carnival… Is Sehun going too?”
Tao looked at her with confused eyes “Sehun?”
This time Jongin decided to step in the hallway and end the conversation sooner “No he isn’t coming. It’s just the two of us.” He said flatly and then smiled at Tao “Hi…”
Tao smiled back at him and brought his hand up in a small wave “Y- you look nice..” he said awkward while Jongin just smiled and thanked him, embarrassed. He heard a squeal from beside him and looked at his mother disapprovingly.
“What? I’m witnessing my son’s first date, I’m excited! Although_”
“Mom we are going now…Bye.” Jongin said while pulling Tao away
“Although I wish it was the person you wanted it to be!” She looked at the boys backs noting how her son looked at the house beside them and his shoulders slumped a little. She sighed and went back in the house.
It would be a lie to say Jongin didn’t enjoy Tao’s company. He was nice and made sure that Jongin has fun. They saw many shows and bought some interesting things that caught their attention, accessories for Tao and food for Jongin; and at the end they went to the special dance show and Tao …. Well he wasn’t exactly bored but dancing wasn’t something he’d choose to watch when his other choice was something exciting like magician show but he wanted to impress Jongin, choosing his favorite instead of his own. He liked Jongin so he could endure it, for him (it wasn’t even that bad). He had fun watching Jongin’s different expressions, the happy glint in his eyes made him even more endearing.
Tao sighed ‘It seems like Sehun really said the truth’ he thought, relieved now. He had heard Sehun being protective of Jongin and unhelpful when someone tried to ask him out, or when they asked Sehun about Jongin’s interests and Jongin’s mom saying something about ‘first date’ just proved that. But Tao decided to take his chance and asked him about Jongin and it seems like he was right.
“I should thank him later.” He thought a little loudly
“Thank who?” he jumped at the voice, coming out of his thoughts he saw Jongin looking at him curiously.
“Oh.. I should thank Sehun.” He answered, noticing the audience scattering around. He has been too busy staring at Jongin and being in his thougshts that he didn’t notice the show has ended.
“Why?”
Tao looked at Jongin again and smiled brightly, “Well because he was the one giving me the idea of bringing you here. He said that you really wanted to come to this carnival.” He continued on babbling about how Sehun has been helpful that he didn’t notice Jongin’s eyes widening for a moment and his expression fall immediately after.
‘Sehun has helped him… Sehun has helped him…. And I was planning to make him jealous.’ All the slightest hope he had left in Sehun loving him back was shattered. He looked up at Tao and smiled slightly “ Yeah, you probably should… Let’s go.” He said and pulled on the other boy’s hand.
He didn’t think today would end like this. On their way back, Jongin was thinking if he should tell Tao or not. He didn’t want to tell him anything about Sehun but their relationship ( which hasn’t really started ) should end tonight. He didn’t want to give Zitao any more hope. So when they stopped in front of his house, he leaned up a little and kissed the other’s cheek, he stepped back and smiled “Thank you for today, I had lots of fun!”
Tao beamed at him “Thank you for coming with me. I hope it wouldn’t our last outing”
“ of course not… but Tao-ya I want to be honest with you. I really like you… but just as a friend ..” Jongin felt bad already when Tao frowned but it had to be said.
“Then why did you accept me when you didn’t like me? I would have never let go of you as a friend even if you had rejected me.” Tao said kindly.
“I’m sorry…” Jongin said softly and looked down
Tao pulled him closer only to kiss him on the forehead gently, “Don’t be sorry for loving someone else… Just be brave to admit it to him.” He whispered and pulled away from him, waving while going the opposite way from him.
Jongin waved back and smiled bitterly “ But I’ll never be brave enough…”
Jongin didn’t go to his balcony that night, he went straight to his bed, ignoring all the texts and calls from Sehun. He wasn’t able to sleep that night.
The next day went on almost uneventful. Since it was their Christmas break, he didn’t have anything to do. He was planning on staying in bed for the rest of the day, maybe even for the rest of the holiday but Kyungsoo decided to ruin his perfect plans, calling and telling him to be ready in 30 minutes because they are going out for lunch. Jongin suspected it had something to do with his curiousness about his date with Tao. After a lot of whining from Jongin and Shouting from Kyungsoo, he finally accepted to go.
That’s how he ended up in his current situation, sitting in a casual small restaurant with his friends. He was eating silently while the other 3 eyed him weirdly, whispering to eachother.
“Has he gone crazy?” Baekhyun asked with wide eyes, receiving a glare from Kyungsoo “You are the crazy one!”
“Then why is he laughing with himself every five minutes!? He is scaring me!”
Sehun stared at Jongin, “ Yah are you okay?” he suddenly asked
Jongin’s head snapped up “ Why wouldn’t I be okay?” he said flatly
“You keep on laughing with yourself!” Kyungsoo said worriedly
“I just keep remembering something funny!” He answered bitterly
“Has Tao done something?” Sehun asked anxiously.
Jongin laughed again “No. Everything was good. I think I should thank you for your help though!”
“HELP!?” Baekhyun and Kyungsoo asked in unison
“ Yeah, Sehun has been kind enough to help Tao in asking me out.” Jongin asked while looking straight at Sehun
Kyungsoo looked him with sad eyes, now he knew what the funny thing Jongin has been remembering was. He was laughing at his own shattered heart, at his useless hopes. “Jongin-ah_”
“Don’t say anything hyung. Just… leave it.” Jongin said quietly, now looking at Kyungsoo.
Kyungsoo stared at his friend’s eyes, seeing his broken heart in them. After a moment he sighed “ Ok. So…How was your date?”
For the first time that day, Jongin smiled sincerely “ It was great hyung.. Tao is really sweet.” And he continued on telling them about the things they did the day before.
“So I guess you two are together now huh?” Sehun said, his voice void of any emotion.
“I don’t know. I haven’t really decided on it yet.” Jongin lied , leaving the last part of their date out.
“Yeah that’s why you didn’t just kiss last night!” Sehun said knowingly
“ You kissed?” the other two said loudly , but Jongin’s eyes were only on Sehun.
“ What if we did? Why do you even care?.... and I didn’t know you had nothing better than watching other people’s private moments.” Jongin said angrily.
Sehun Sqeezed the spoon in his hand “ I_ Well I should approve of the person you want to date.”
“Why exactly would I need your approval? And I thought you approved of Tao, since you helped him and all!” Jongin mocked
“Because I’m your best friend!”
Jongin scoffed and returned to eating his food while Kyungsoo eyed Sehun warily, he needed to talk to Sehun.
Sehun was annoyed, why would Jongin be like that? Why does he like Tao and not him? He thought angrily as he pushed the buttons of the controller with a little too much force while ignoring his cellphone’s ringing.
After a while he answered as the person kept on calling and it was annoying him,
“What?”
“Show some respect you idiot” now that he thought about it he could just hang up and put his phone on silent mode or turn it off but he thought better of it as he didn’t want to face Kyungsoo’s wrath later.
“Whatever…”
Kyungsoo sighed “ Just come out for a while. I want to talk to you!” and he hung up.
As Sehun exited his house, he saw Kyungsoo standing by the park near their house and he wasn’t alone.
“Why is Baekhyun hyung here?” he asked, he was in no mood for Baekhyun’s silly jokes and pranks
“ Because I can!” Baekhyun said smugly, throwing an arm around kyungsoo
Sehun glared at him and looked at Kyungsoo “ So what did you want to talk about?”
“About you being an idiot!” Baekhyun quickly said receiving another glare from Sehun
“I’m going home..”
Kyungsoo grabbed his arm, stopping him “Well what Baekhyun said is just part of the problem, it’s actually you being a complete idiot in front of Jongin…” Sehun stared at them blankly so Kyungsoo clarified “ We know you like Jongin”
Sehun’s eyes widened for a moment and then quickly returned to their usual blankness. “So what?”
Kyungsoo huffed in annoyance “ You know what your problem is? You don’t show any caring toward others even if you care about them. If you continue on like this, Jongin will never know that you love him!”
“What’s the point in telling him? He is with Zitao anyway.”
“You really are stupid… he did that in hopes of getting a reaction out of you!” Baekhyun blurted out, irritated by his friends actions
“You actually mean that he_” he trailed off, shocked by the news he received.
“ yeah he wasn’t really too hopeful but you always acted so protective of him that he thought that maybe you do feel the same. He said that this was his last hope to know if you’d show any reaction but_”
“But I was the one who helped Tao… I’m an idiot!” Sehun exclaimed
Baekhyun scoffed “ I’ve been telling you from long ago!”
“I should talk to him.” Sehun said and turned to go toward Jongin’s house when Kyungsoo stopped him “ Please don’t mess up!” Sehun nodded before running to Jongin’s house.
He couldn’t believe it, all this time Jongin has liked him too but he didn’t say anything.
Sehun rang the bell while fidgeting on his feet. The door opened revealing Mrs. Kim, “Hi auntie.. Is Jongin home?” he was dying to just run upstairs but he had manners so that was out of question.
“Hey Sehun. Yeah he is in his room. Come in.” after welcoming Sehun to the house, she went to kitchen to get her works done.
Sehun turned and ran upstairs at fast speed. He knocked first since he knew Jongin is sensitive to others going in without permission.
As soon as Jongin opened the door, the air was knocked out of him. It took him a moment to grasp the fact that Sehun is kissing him. He stared at the other with wide eyes, pushing at his shoulder but to no avail; Sehun just held him tighter, kissing him almost roughly, almost desperately. Jongin didn’t even realize when he had closed his eyes and started to respond the kiss until he felt Sehun peppering kisses along his jaw line, panting softly “god…I love you Jongin…” he opened his eyes and pushed Sehun with all the power he had, this time succeeding.
Jongin leaned back against the wall -when did he even end up against the wall!- and looked at Sehun who was standing infront of him, breathing as hard as Jongin himself.
“Since when did you joke around like that? We’re too old for these things!”
“Do you really think I go around kissing people as a joke?” Sehun said accusingly
“Do you tell them you love them too?” Jongin asked softly, ignoring Sehun’s answer
“Jongin I’m being honest with you.. I really_”
“Then why did you help Tao? You were never like that. You always gave wrong facts to my admirers , I had a tiny hope that you felt the same but then suddenly you go and help him!” Jongin said angrily, tears filling his eyes
“ Why did you accept him if you like me? I didn’t think you would.. that’s why I helped.” Sehun threw back
“You never show any feelings. I can’t tell what you want to do. How would you expect me to know you like me when you didn’t even say anything!?” Jongin said loudly, trying to hold in his tears
“Why didn’t you say anything then? And you kissed him.”
“I didn’t know if you liked me back, I didn’t want to ruin our friendship!” the tears finally rolled down, all these years of pent up emotions flowing out. “ the kiss meant nothing. I rejected him, we are just friends!” he sniffed and continued “ I was just insecure. You always confuse me.”
Sehun’s eyes softened, he went closer and put his hand on both side of Jongin’s face, wiping his tears with his thumb gently “You have always been such a cry baby…” he chuckled as Jongin let out a teary laugh and punched him softly, his tears still flowing down without control, he looked down embarrassedly. Sehun pulled his head up to face him, “Hey don’t worry. I love you being a cry baby!” he smiled sweetly while Jongin blushed
Sehun leaned in closer and sealed their lips once again, this time kissing him softly, gently; Trying to put all his love in that kiss.
He leaned his forehead against the other’s and smiled “ I love you so much.”
Jongin pecked him quickly in response “ I love you too”
“ So will you be my boyfriend?” Sehun asked with eager eyes
“I have to think about it!” Jongin said flatly, trying not to laugh at Sehun’s sullen face.
“Yah I thought you wanted to_”
Jongin kissed his cheek “Yes I want to.”
Sehun’s bright smile was quickly back on his face “I knew it!”
Mrs. Kim squealed and quickly picked the phone, calling a familiar number
“Hey Taeyeon-a_”
“Bo Ah-yah They are finally together..” she said happily
A happy shriek was heard from the other woman.
Weeks later:
Sehun huffed in annoyance as he glanced at the two women currently talking in full speed infront of them. They were currently in Oh resident for the usual every year Christmas celebration and their moms haven’t left them alone since the beginning of the party. An embarrassed blushing Jongin stared at them in horror as they talked about how they should dress him up, leaving no room for objection. Sehun decided that it was enough and grabbed Jongin’s hand and stood up, going toward the stairs.
“Sehun where is your manners, we were talking to you.” Mrs. Oh shouted after them
“I won’t let you doll him up. He isn’t Luhan hyung.” Sehun said darkly now pulling Jongin upstairs, making the other sigh in relief.
“Yeah like you wouldn’t like it if we make him pretty for you!” His mom said knowingly
Sehun continued his way up “Well not always but maybe I’ll let you do it sometimes.” He answered, not looking back
“YAH!”
“What? You’d look beautiful_ OUCH”
Mrs. Oh and Mrs. Kim high fived each other.
~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~
Jongin looked at the sleeping man beside him and sighed contently. He stroked his cheek and smiled as the other pulled him closer. Sehun was possessive even in his sleep. After a while Jongin freed himself from the other carefully and stood up, relieved that the other is still asleep. His original plan was to drink milk and go back to asleep but as he entered the living room, his eyes caught the scene on the outside. He stood in front of the window and stared at the snow falling gently on the ground, creating a beautiful white scenery. It was mesmerizing.
Jongin jumped when an arm snaked around his waist, he turned his head slightly to see a sleepy Sehun putting his head on his shoulder.
“What are you doing here? You should be sleeping!”Sehun asked with his eyes barely open
“ Look, It’s snowing!” Jongin whispered happily, leaning his head on the others.
“Yeah and you’ll be able to see that tomorrow too. Let’s go back to bed. We need all our energy for tomorrow.” Sehun said, now more conscious that before.
“Why? It’s just a Christmas party.”
“ Well our mothers are going to be there so_”
“Okay I got it.”
“Remembered the last time huh?” Sehun smirked
“ Yeah and you didn’t even try to stop them!” Jongin scowled
“Well I must admit that I didn’t enjoy the view_ OW… Yah what’s with you and hitting me?” Sehun said while rubbing his arm.
“If they do it again tomorrow, I’ll_”
“What are you going to do?” Sehun said smugly
“I’ll invite wonshik over.” It was Jongin’s turn to smirk as the other’s mouth fell open “You know he has always wanted to come by_”
“You wouldn’t dare.” Sehun narrowed his eyes
Jongin crossed his arm “I would. You know I would do it!”
“ But what if I couldn’t save you? You are going to invite your perverted student to our apartment? What if he does something to you?” Sehun frowned as he started listing the things he thinks wonsik will do
“Well do something to prevent them from dressing me up. It’s been so long since the first time, I can’t believe they still want to do it every time they see me.” Jongin pouted
“You say that like we are in our 70s.We’re only 25, the first time was just about 7 years ago.” Sehun said as he led the other male back to bed.
Pulling Jongin closer as they laid down, he thought of the long way they have come together. Some days they were so exhausted, with him being an intern in law firm and Jongin a dance teacher at college. They was drained out when they came home, But they tried to make time for each other as much as they could. He was happy that they have lasted this long and hoped to spend the rest of life with his lover.
“You know.. now that I think about it, I have loved you since we were kindergarteners.” Sehun said, his voice muffled by Jongin’s hair
“But you were so mean, always angry with me!” Jongin said sleepily, the other’s warmth lulling him to sleep already
“But I never shared my chocolate with anyone but you.” Sehun whispered just as the other fell asleep. He pressed a lingering kiss to Jongin’s forehead and closed his eyes, joining the other in dream land.
“ Ahh I just remembered, Tao is invited to the party too!”
“We’re not going.”
Jongin just sighed and rolled his eyes, trying to pull the other out of their apartment.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Sorry if there was any mistakes. and sorry if its too fluffy. I always decide to write less fluffy but it ends up fluffy nontheless -_-
Genre:Fluff.Romance.Light angst
Couple:Sekai. side Baeksoo
Summery: Jongin always looked at him carefully, in hopes of finding something he always wanted.
Jongin looked at the boy sleeping peacefully on the desk beside him. Most of the other students in class were doing the same, sleeping. It was History class afterall. Jongin would normally listen or he would doodle on his book when bored but nowadays he preferred Sehun to a lot of things. He was still pondering if he should tell the other about it but he hasn’t been strong enough to do so.
He had decided on confessing to Sehun before but there were three reasons stopping him: 1. Interruption by their friends 2.Sehun saying something that made Jongin say something else and the last one which happened more was Jongin freezing on the last minute, not saying anything, making Baekhyun and Kyungsoo sigh sadly by the side, “Why don’t you just blurt it out like in those dramas you always watch?” Baekhyun would say afterward when they are sitting in class
“I don’t watch dramas!” Jongin would glare at him, a pretty blush adoring his cheeks, “… and what if he doesn’t like me back? I would just ruin our friendship…”
And with that said Baekhyun would sigh again, he couldn’t tell Jongin how Sehun’s eyes would lit up when Jongin entered the room and how he would glare at Taemin every time he danced a little too close to Jongin. He couldn’t tell him because he wouldn’t even believe Baekhyun’s words and would think of it as a way to get him to confess.
Jongin was the best in reading Sehun’s expressions, but sometimes even he couldn’t understand what the other felt. Sehun had a way of showing whichever emotion he wanted the others see. If he didn’t want them know what he felt, his expression would go blank. Jongin has tried, he had searched for the emotions he wanted to see many times but he never found them. After all these years, he couldn’t really hope to see them either.
“YAH… wake up. It’s lunch time!”
Jongin was shaken from his thoughts by Baekhyuns loud voice shouting in Sehun’s ear, shaking him wildly. Sehun groaned and swatted Baekhyun but Jongin could see him opening his eyes slowly. Jongin looked at them amused by their actions, but his attention was taken away from them when a hand landed on his shoulder. He turned to see Tao , a friend of Sehun, smiling down at him, he returned the smile “ Hey Tao what’s up?”
“Jongin-ah I was wondering if you’d like to go to the carnival this Saturday, I heard they are having a special dance show only on this weekend!” Tao said rubbing the back of his neck nervously.
Jongin gave him a half smile and took a quick glance at Sehun but he was still busy bickering with Baekhyun. Jongin fisted his hand and faced Tao, “I’d love to go with you!” He said loudly. Tao beamed at him and told him that he would pick him up the next day. Jongin knew it wasn’t nice to give him false hope but he couldn’t help it. A plan was already forming in his head, he was going to go on and on about the date in front of Sehun and see his reaction. If he didn’t do anything, Jongin was going to move on. He wasn’t going to wait for eternity, he had feelings and it felt nice to feel wanted.
“Ow…” Jongin winced when Kyungsoo flicked his forehead,
“What was all that about?” He said, knowing Jongin too well that he already could say what was going on in his head.
Jongin shrugged “I can’t just sit around and wait for him forever!”
“But first you should move on, before going out with someone else!”
“He doesn’t know that so he could help me move on!”
“You don’t even want to move on!” Kyungsoo said sarcastically
“Whatever!” Jongin mumbled and began to gather his books. He pulled his lunch box out and strolled toward the cafeteria with Kyungsoo, not waiting for Baekhyun and Sehun.
“Let’s go out tomorrow …” Baekhyun cheered from his place in front of Jongin, “Since we’ve just gone through the exams, let’s go have fun. Karaoke, amusement park, carnival, we could go anywhere.”
As the other three started to discuss their plans for the next day, Jongin decided to stay silent and eat his food.
“Hey Jongin-ah why are you not saying anything? You are usually the eager one for these things.”
Jongin just shrugged “Sorry. I can’t come along with you guys, I have other plans.”
Baekhyun frowned “ What plans?”
“He is going on a date!” Kyungsoo replied instead of Jongin
Baekhyun’s eyes widened while Sehun’s didn’t even raise his head and just continued on eating his food. Jongin looked at him sadly.
“What are you saying? He is lying right?” Baekhyun asked loudly
Jongin nodded “ He isn’t. I’m going on a date. With Zitao.” He said not taking his eyes off of Sehun, desperately looking for something, anything that meant Sehun isn’t incurious about all this dating but to his disappointment, there was no reaction.
“What? But you don’t_”
Jongin interrupted him “ I agreed to go because I wanted to, so don’t try to make me change my decision!” and with that said, the discussion ended and Kyungsoo changed the subject to their plans for their outing.
Going home in silence wasn’t something usual for them. Jongin and Sehun would normally be seen playing and joking around, full of joy and laughter on their way; putting a smile on their neighbors faces with their cheerful behavior but this time none of that was happening. Thoughts of breaking the silence was running through their mind but this time they didn’t know what to say.
The sky was dark before they knew it and like every night, Sehun was sitting in his room’s balcony waiting for Jongin to come out of his room to talk. After waiting for half an hour, he was going to go back inside -it was cold even for him who liked cold weather- when he heard the other house balcony door open. “Hey..” Sehun said softly, looking at the other side as Jongin sat on a chair.
After a moment of silence, Jongin spoke up “So what is tonight’s subject?” they didn’t really chose subjects for their nightly chats, they didn’t need any as they just started to talk about anything in their mind but today it seemed difficult to talk to other.
“Do you like Zitao?” Sehun suddenly asked, shocking Jongin
“What are yo_”
“Do you?” Sehun insisted on his question
Jongin sighed and looked down “ I don’t know..”
“Then why are you going out with him?” Sehun asked looking at Jongin with serious eyes
“You say that like he is already my boyfriend!” Jongin exclaimed but then continued in a soft tone “ and it’s my first time going out with someone… no one has really wanted me until now. I just want to try I guess.”
“ Are you crazy? A lot of people want to be with you!” Sehun protested
Jongin glared at him “ yeah but after you chased them away, everyone thinks I’m dating you so they don’t dare come close to me!”
“Then let’s da_ Sorry.” Sehun said and mentally scolded himself for his slipup.
“But you aren’t bad mouthing Tao so you must approve of him huh?” Jongin said quietly
“I guess. He is my friend after all.”
After a few minutes in silence, Jongin sighed heavily and stood up “ I should go back. I don’t want to be sleepy tomorrow. Good night!” going in without waiting for Sehun’s response
Sehun looked at the other as he went in “ First date? Is there going to be second one? …. You are an idiot Oh Sehun.”
Jongin was nervous, he has been nervous around Tao since he saw him so he didn’t think anything of it. Tao just had an aura that scared him and made him nervous. He wasn’t afraid of him now that he knew his personality but the nervousness never went away. But Tao always treated him well and Jongin didn’t want leave a bad impression now that he has accepted him. So unlike what he has decided, he wore something nice and waited for Tao.
He was watching some random drama when the door bell rang. He stood up and was ready to run toward the door before anyone else (his mom) did but to his horror, his mom was already at the door greeting the other boy. He heard Tao greeting formally “Hello Mrs. Kim I’m Zitao.”
“Ahh Hi Zitao! What brings you here?” She answered rather cheerfully, ignoring Tao’s fidgeting
“ Umm, I’m here to pick Jongin up. We’re going to the carnival.” He said nervously
“Oh the carnival… Is Sehun going too?”
Tao looked at her with confused eyes “Sehun?”
This time Jongin decided to step in the hallway and end the conversation sooner “No he isn’t coming. It’s just the two of us.” He said flatly and then smiled at Tao “Hi…”
Tao smiled back at him and brought his hand up in a small wave “Y- you look nice..” he said awkward while Jongin just smiled and thanked him, embarrassed. He heard a squeal from beside him and looked at his mother disapprovingly.
“What? I’m witnessing my son’s first date, I’m excited! Although_”
“Mom we are going now…Bye.” Jongin said while pulling Tao away
“Although I wish it was the person you wanted it to be!” She looked at the boys backs noting how her son looked at the house beside them and his shoulders slumped a little. She sighed and went back in the house.
It would be a lie to say Jongin didn’t enjoy Tao’s company. He was nice and made sure that Jongin has fun. They saw many shows and bought some interesting things that caught their attention, accessories for Tao and food for Jongin; and at the end they went to the special dance show and Tao …. Well he wasn’t exactly bored but dancing wasn’t something he’d choose to watch when his other choice was something exciting like magician show but he wanted to impress Jongin, choosing his favorite instead of his own. He liked Jongin so he could endure it, for him (it wasn’t even that bad). He had fun watching Jongin’s different expressions, the happy glint in his eyes made him even more endearing.
Tao sighed ‘It seems like Sehun really said the truth’ he thought, relieved now. He had heard Sehun being protective of Jongin and unhelpful when someone tried to ask him out, or when they asked Sehun about Jongin’s interests and Jongin’s mom saying something about ‘first date’ just proved that. But Tao decided to take his chance and asked him about Jongin and it seems like he was right.
“I should thank him later.” He thought a little loudly
“Thank who?” he jumped at the voice, coming out of his thoughts he saw Jongin looking at him curiously.
“Oh.. I should thank Sehun.” He answered, noticing the audience scattering around. He has been too busy staring at Jongin and being in his thougshts that he didn’t notice the show has ended.
“Why?”
Tao looked at Jongin again and smiled brightly, “Well because he was the one giving me the idea of bringing you here. He said that you really wanted to come to this carnival.” He continued on babbling about how Sehun has been helpful that he didn’t notice Jongin’s eyes widening for a moment and his expression fall immediately after.
‘Sehun has helped him… Sehun has helped him…. And I was planning to make him jealous.’ All the slightest hope he had left in Sehun loving him back was shattered. He looked up at Tao and smiled slightly “ Yeah, you probably should… Let’s go.” He said and pulled on the other boy’s hand.
He didn’t think today would end like this. On their way back, Jongin was thinking if he should tell Tao or not. He didn’t want to tell him anything about Sehun but their relationship ( which hasn’t really started ) should end tonight. He didn’t want to give Zitao any more hope. So when they stopped in front of his house, he leaned up a little and kissed the other’s cheek, he stepped back and smiled “Thank you for today, I had lots of fun!”
Tao beamed at him “Thank you for coming with me. I hope it wouldn’t our last outing”
“ of course not… but Tao-ya I want to be honest with you. I really like you… but just as a friend ..” Jongin felt bad already when Tao frowned but it had to be said.
“Then why did you accept me when you didn’t like me? I would have never let go of you as a friend even if you had rejected me.” Tao said kindly.
“I’m sorry…” Jongin said softly and looked down
Tao pulled him closer only to kiss him on the forehead gently, “Don’t be sorry for loving someone else… Just be brave to admit it to him.” He whispered and pulled away from him, waving while going the opposite way from him.
Jongin waved back and smiled bitterly “ But I’ll never be brave enough…”
Jongin didn’t go to his balcony that night, he went straight to his bed, ignoring all the texts and calls from Sehun. He wasn’t able to sleep that night.
The next day went on almost uneventful. Since it was their Christmas break, he didn’t have anything to do. He was planning on staying in bed for the rest of the day, maybe even for the rest of the holiday but Kyungsoo decided to ruin his perfect plans, calling and telling him to be ready in 30 minutes because they are going out for lunch. Jongin suspected it had something to do with his curiousness about his date with Tao. After a lot of whining from Jongin and Shouting from Kyungsoo, he finally accepted to go.
That’s how he ended up in his current situation, sitting in a casual small restaurant with his friends. He was eating silently while the other 3 eyed him weirdly, whispering to eachother.
“Has he gone crazy?” Baekhyun asked with wide eyes, receiving a glare from Kyungsoo “You are the crazy one!”
“Then why is he laughing with himself every five minutes!? He is scaring me!”
Sehun stared at Jongin, “ Yah are you okay?” he suddenly asked
Jongin’s head snapped up “ Why wouldn’t I be okay?” he said flatly
“You keep on laughing with yourself!” Kyungsoo said worriedly
“I just keep remembering something funny!” He answered bitterly
“Has Tao done something?” Sehun asked anxiously.
Jongin laughed again “No. Everything was good. I think I should thank you for your help though!”
“HELP!?” Baekhyun and Kyungsoo asked in unison
“ Yeah, Sehun has been kind enough to help Tao in asking me out.” Jongin asked while looking straight at Sehun
Kyungsoo looked him with sad eyes, now he knew what the funny thing Jongin has been remembering was. He was laughing at his own shattered heart, at his useless hopes. “Jongin-ah_”
“Don’t say anything hyung. Just… leave it.” Jongin said quietly, now looking at Kyungsoo.
Kyungsoo stared at his friend’s eyes, seeing his broken heart in them. After a moment he sighed “ Ok. So…How was your date?”
For the first time that day, Jongin smiled sincerely “ It was great hyung.. Tao is really sweet.” And he continued on telling them about the things they did the day before.
“So I guess you two are together now huh?” Sehun said, his voice void of any emotion.
“I don’t know. I haven’t really decided on it yet.” Jongin lied , leaving the last part of their date out.
“Yeah that’s why you didn’t just kiss last night!” Sehun said knowingly
“ You kissed?” the other two said loudly , but Jongin’s eyes were only on Sehun.
“ What if we did? Why do you even care?.... and I didn’t know you had nothing better than watching other people’s private moments.” Jongin said angrily.
Sehun Sqeezed the spoon in his hand “ I_ Well I should approve of the person you want to date.”
“Why exactly would I need your approval? And I thought you approved of Tao, since you helped him and all!” Jongin mocked
“Because I’m your best friend!”
Jongin scoffed and returned to eating his food while Kyungsoo eyed Sehun warily, he needed to talk to Sehun.
Sehun was annoyed, why would Jongin be like that? Why does he like Tao and not him? He thought angrily as he pushed the buttons of the controller with a little too much force while ignoring his cellphone’s ringing.
After a while he answered as the person kept on calling and it was annoying him,
“What?”
“Show some respect you idiot” now that he thought about it he could just hang up and put his phone on silent mode or turn it off but he thought better of it as he didn’t want to face Kyungsoo’s wrath later.
“Whatever…”
Kyungsoo sighed “ Just come out for a while. I want to talk to you!” and he hung up.
As Sehun exited his house, he saw Kyungsoo standing by the park near their house and he wasn’t alone.
“Why is Baekhyun hyung here?” he asked, he was in no mood for Baekhyun’s silly jokes and pranks
“ Because I can!” Baekhyun said smugly, throwing an arm around kyungsoo
Sehun glared at him and looked at Kyungsoo “ So what did you want to talk about?”
“About you being an idiot!” Baekhyun quickly said receiving another glare from Sehun
“I’m going home..”
Kyungsoo grabbed his arm, stopping him “Well what Baekhyun said is just part of the problem, it’s actually you being a complete idiot in front of Jongin…” Sehun stared at them blankly so Kyungsoo clarified “ We know you like Jongin”
Sehun’s eyes widened for a moment and then quickly returned to their usual blankness. “So what?”
Kyungsoo huffed in annoyance “ You know what your problem is? You don’t show any caring toward others even if you care about them. If you continue on like this, Jongin will never know that you love him!”
“What’s the point in telling him? He is with Zitao anyway.”
“You really are stupid… he did that in hopes of getting a reaction out of you!” Baekhyun blurted out, irritated by his friends actions
“You actually mean that he_” he trailed off, shocked by the news he received.
“ yeah he wasn’t really too hopeful but you always acted so protective of him that he thought that maybe you do feel the same. He said that this was his last hope to know if you’d show any reaction but_”
“But I was the one who helped Tao… I’m an idiot!” Sehun exclaimed
Baekhyun scoffed “ I’ve been telling you from long ago!”
“I should talk to him.” Sehun said and turned to go toward Jongin’s house when Kyungsoo stopped him “ Please don’t mess up!” Sehun nodded before running to Jongin’s house.
He couldn’t believe it, all this time Jongin has liked him too but he didn’t say anything.
Sehun rang the bell while fidgeting on his feet. The door opened revealing Mrs. Kim, “Hi auntie.. Is Jongin home?” he was dying to just run upstairs but he had manners so that was out of question.
“Hey Sehun. Yeah he is in his room. Come in.” after welcoming Sehun to the house, she went to kitchen to get her works done.
Sehun turned and ran upstairs at fast speed. He knocked first since he knew Jongin is sensitive to others going in without permission.
As soon as Jongin opened the door, the air was knocked out of him. It took him a moment to grasp the fact that Sehun is kissing him. He stared at the other with wide eyes, pushing at his shoulder but to no avail; Sehun just held him tighter, kissing him almost roughly, almost desperately. Jongin didn’t even realize when he had closed his eyes and started to respond the kiss until he felt Sehun peppering kisses along his jaw line, panting softly “god…I love you Jongin…” he opened his eyes and pushed Sehun with all the power he had, this time succeeding.
Jongin leaned back against the wall -when did he even end up against the wall!- and looked at Sehun who was standing infront of him, breathing as hard as Jongin himself.
“Since when did you joke around like that? We’re too old for these things!”
“Do you really think I go around kissing people as a joke?” Sehun said accusingly
“Do you tell them you love them too?” Jongin asked softly, ignoring Sehun’s answer
“Jongin I’m being honest with you.. I really_”
“Then why did you help Tao? You were never like that. You always gave wrong facts to my admirers , I had a tiny hope that you felt the same but then suddenly you go and help him!” Jongin said angrily, tears filling his eyes
“ Why did you accept him if you like me? I didn’t think you would.. that’s why I helped.” Sehun threw back
“You never show any feelings. I can’t tell what you want to do. How would you expect me to know you like me when you didn’t even say anything!?” Jongin said loudly, trying to hold in his tears
“Why didn’t you say anything then? And you kissed him.”
“I didn’t know if you liked me back, I didn’t want to ruin our friendship!” the tears finally rolled down, all these years of pent up emotions flowing out. “ the kiss meant nothing. I rejected him, we are just friends!” he sniffed and continued “ I was just insecure. You always confuse me.”
Sehun’s eyes softened, he went closer and put his hand on both side of Jongin’s face, wiping his tears with his thumb gently “You have always been such a cry baby…” he chuckled as Jongin let out a teary laugh and punched him softly, his tears still flowing down without control, he looked down embarrassedly. Sehun pulled his head up to face him, “Hey don’t worry. I love you being a cry baby!” he smiled sweetly while Jongin blushed
Sehun leaned in closer and sealed their lips once again, this time kissing him softly, gently; Trying to put all his love in that kiss.
He leaned his forehead against the other’s and smiled “ I love you so much.”
Jongin pecked him quickly in response “ I love you too”
“ So will you be my boyfriend?” Sehun asked with eager eyes
“I have to think about it!” Jongin said flatly, trying not to laugh at Sehun’s sullen face.
“Yah I thought you wanted to_”
Jongin kissed his cheek “Yes I want to.”
Sehun’s bright smile was quickly back on his face “I knew it!”
Mrs. Kim squealed and quickly picked the phone, calling a familiar number
“Hey Taeyeon-a_”
“Bo Ah-yah They are finally together..” she said happily
A happy shriek was heard from the other woman.
Weeks later:
Sehun huffed in annoyance as he glanced at the two women currently talking in full speed infront of them. They were currently in Oh resident for the usual every year Christmas celebration and their moms haven’t left them alone since the beginning of the party. An embarrassed blushing Jongin stared at them in horror as they talked about how they should dress him up, leaving no room for objection. Sehun decided that it was enough and grabbed Jongin’s hand and stood up, going toward the stairs.
“Sehun where is your manners, we were talking to you.” Mrs. Oh shouted after them
“I won’t let you doll him up. He isn’t Luhan hyung.” Sehun said darkly now pulling Jongin upstairs, making the other sigh in relief.
“Yeah like you wouldn’t like it if we make him pretty for you!” His mom said knowingly
Sehun continued his way up “Well not always but maybe I’ll let you do it sometimes.” He answered, not looking back
“YAH!”
“What? You’d look beautiful_ OUCH”
Mrs. Oh and Mrs. Kim high fived each other.
~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~
Jongin looked at the sleeping man beside him and sighed contently. He stroked his cheek and smiled as the other pulled him closer. Sehun was possessive even in his sleep. After a while Jongin freed himself from the other carefully and stood up, relieved that the other is still asleep. His original plan was to drink milk and go back to asleep but as he entered the living room, his eyes caught the scene on the outside. He stood in front of the window and stared at the snow falling gently on the ground, creating a beautiful white scenery. It was mesmerizing.
Jongin jumped when an arm snaked around his waist, he turned his head slightly to see a sleepy Sehun putting his head on his shoulder.
“What are you doing here? You should be sleeping!”Sehun asked with his eyes barely open
“ Look, It’s snowing!” Jongin whispered happily, leaning his head on the others.
“Yeah and you’ll be able to see that tomorrow too. Let’s go back to bed. We need all our energy for tomorrow.” Sehun said, now more conscious that before.
“Why? It’s just a Christmas party.”
“ Well our mothers are going to be there so_”
“Okay I got it.”
“Remembered the last time huh?” Sehun smirked
“ Yeah and you didn’t even try to stop them!” Jongin scowled
“Well I must admit that I didn’t enjoy the view_ OW… Yah what’s with you and hitting me?” Sehun said while rubbing his arm.
“If they do it again tomorrow, I’ll_”
“What are you going to do?” Sehun said smugly
“I’ll invite wonshik over.” It was Jongin’s turn to smirk as the other’s mouth fell open “You know he has always wanted to come by_”
“You wouldn’t dare.” Sehun narrowed his eyes
Jongin crossed his arm “I would. You know I would do it!”
“ But what if I couldn’t save you? You are going to invite your perverted student to our apartment? What if he does something to you?” Sehun frowned as he started listing the things he thinks wonsik will do
“Well do something to prevent them from dressing me up. It’s been so long since the first time, I can’t believe they still want to do it every time they see me.” Jongin pouted
“You say that like we are in our 70s.We’re only 25, the first time was just about 7 years ago.” Sehun said as he led the other male back to bed.
Pulling Jongin closer as they laid down, he thought of the long way they have come together. Some days they were so exhausted, with him being an intern in law firm and Jongin a dance teacher at college. They was drained out when they came home, But they tried to make time for each other as much as they could. He was happy that they have lasted this long and hoped to spend the rest of life with his lover.
“You know.. now that I think about it, I have loved you since we were kindergarteners.” Sehun said, his voice muffled by Jongin’s hair
“But you were so mean, always angry with me!” Jongin said sleepily, the other’s warmth lulling him to sleep already
“But I never shared my chocolate with anyone but you.” Sehun whispered just as the other fell asleep. He pressed a lingering kiss to Jongin’s forehead and closed his eyes, joining the other in dream land.
“ Ahh I just remembered, Tao is invited to the party too!”
“We’re not going.”
Jongin just sighed and rolled his eyes, trying to pull the other out of their apartment.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Sorry if there was any mistakes. and sorry if its too fluffy. I always decide to write less fluffy but it ends up fluffy nontheless -_-