"Administering a Severe Beating"--K/S/Mc
st_tos_kink fill: Kirk getting (consentually) spanked - by McCoy or Spock, doesn't matter, let's just have some nice d/s powerplay (optimal) and spanking, please!
Only I figured it might as well be Kirk getting (consensually) spanked by McCoy AND Spock.
Spock listened to the explanation. Naturally, being a Vulcan, he was not at all distracted by the fact that McCoy had removed his uniform shirt during said explanation. "And this is enjoyable?"
McCoy laughed. "Well, don't knock it 'til you've tried it."
"The captain will find this acceptable?"
"Oh, yes. We've already worked out the details." McCoy bounced slightly. "The fact that he got out of line on the away mission is just a happy coincidence."
"The girl?"
"The girl."
"Doctor, I was not aware that there had been any discussion of..." Spock struggled to find the most accurate phrasing. The Vulcan way was far simpler--Spock was bonded to neither human, and thus it was impossible that he could be engaging in sexual intercourse with either one of them. As for the issue of "getting out of line", a full bond meant an exclusive sexual relationship until the death of one partner (although Spock's father and other members of their family had somehow been able to find perfectly logical means to circumvent this assumption).
As for the human way, there were an excessive number of terms and degrees. Spock had only been able to rule out the terminology that was almost always coded as female.
"If any...obligations have been set, I was not present at the time," Spock said.
McCoy looked at him as if Spock were mentally impaired. "The hell are you on about?"
"I have neither requested nor received a promise to refrain from fornicating with additional beings."
"Oh. No, I didn't think you had."
"And you have not?"
"No, of course not. I mean, that'd make things pretty awkward, wouldn't it?"
Spock found himself most interested in the statues by the captain's desk as he said, "I had assumed such an agreement would place restrictions on additional beings other than ourselves."
"Well, like you said, Spock, if anybody's made that agreement, I wasn't there to sign off on it."
"Then you intend to punish the captain for breaking a rule that does not exist."
"Exactly."
"Explain."
"Spock, this isn't something you do when you're really pissed," said McCoy. "And Jim doesn't cheat. Don't give me that look." Apparently it was acceptable to joke about the captain's rule breaking in every area except the romantic. "You set the obligations, Jim'll stick to 'em."
Spock considered this. "It is more enjoyable because it is a pretense?"
"That's right. And I think he'll like this a whole lot better than whatever bullshit I was going to make up."
"I fail to see how one pretense would be more appealing than another," said Spock.
"It's...you're saying that he's yours."
"Ours." Spock held out his fingers for a kiss. "Obviously I will require your assistance to administer a suitably severe beating."
"Spanking." McCoy kissed him with his fingertips. "Severe beating...don't you do anything unless I tell you to."
"Yes, Doctor." Spock slowly kissed his knuckles.
"You ever slapped anybody?"
"You are attempting to determine if I will find it painful to repeatedly slap another being's buttocks."
"Goes on long enough and I'll find it painful. Even with human hands."
Spock had been about to kiss McCoy's hand with his mouth. "Is that a hint?"
"No. And what'd I tell you about sounding like an anatomy textbook?"
"Perhaps a better physician would have a finer appreciation for accurate terminology."
"You want me to bend you over my knee, just say so."
Spock looked up from the distal phalanxes of McCoy's first three fingers. "Is there some sexual component to the human knee that I am unaware of?"
McCoy sighed. "It is the traditional Earth location for hobgoblins who need a severe beating administered to their green buttocks."
Spock considered this scenario as he traced the creases of McCoy's palm.
"Your hands, Spock. We were talking about your hands," said McCoy. "I don't want you making yourself miserable just because--"
"The captain, however..."
"Oh, don't worry about him."
"Worry about who?" Jim asked. He grinned at them. "Started without me? I thought I made it very clear," he took Spock's hand from McCoy, "that you aren't allowed to start without me. Unless I get to find you in a very compromising position." He stroked Spock's fingers and kissed McCoy with his mouth.
"You ready, Jim?" McCoy asked.
"Hold on." Spock watched as the humans kissed again. "Now I'm ready."
McCoy seized Jim's collar. "Allowed's a very interesting word, Jim. You think you're allowed to run off with any humanoid who'll take you?"
"Bones, I can--"
"Shut up. Spock, what the hell are we going to do with him?"
"Obviously we cannot allow this behavior to continue," said Spock. He felt it would have been preferable to watch the humans' illogical method of kissing while one or both of them stroked his fingers.
"You remember what happens when you don't behave?" McCoy asked.
"Can't we discuss this?" Jim asked.
"This is part of the problem, Jim." McCoy seemed to be reaching for Spock. When Spock moved closer, McCoy took his hand and raised it to his mouth. "Spock and I discuss things." He sucked on the tip of Spock's index finger for an insufficient duration. When Spock indicated his disapproval, McCoy smiled fondly at him and kissed his cheek with the backs of his fingers. "But you, Jim, you're supposed to do what we say."
"Oh?" Jim was smiling again. "And if you say one thing, and Spock says another--"
McCoy grabbed Jim's shirt, gripping it so tightly that Spock could hear the strain on the seams. "Then you'd better hope you can do both at the same time."
"I do not believe I am familiar with what happens when the captain fails to follow instructions," said Spock. He found it fascinating that his feigned ignorance seemed to amuse and delight the humans as much as it did, just as he was fascinated by the similarity between the pretense and the nature of their professional relationship.
"An old Earth custom known as a spanking," said McCoy. He let go of Jim's shirt and stroked the back of Spock's hand.
"It is in no way related to a severe beating?"
McCoy stuck his tongue out at him. "Jesus, Bones, what've you been telling him?" Jim asked.
"I thought I told you to be quiet," said McCoy. He turned back to Spock. "Usually he gets bent over my knee--he lies across my lap--or in this case, yours."
"Given the nature of the offense, I do not believe he deserves that level of physical contact," said Spock.
McCoy beamed at him. "I think you're right, Spock."
"I'm sorry, did I make it back to the right ship?" Jim asked. "I could swear I just heard Leonard McCoy say that Spock was--"
"Jim, drop your pants and bend over the desk. I knew you'd be a quick study," he said to Spock in a low voice. As McCoy kissed him with his mouth and the fingers of both hands, Spock kept one eye on Jim. Repeated open handed blows to the 'ass' were not the first possibility that came to mind when Jim bent over the desk.
"Do you know what would really teach me a lesson?" Jim asked.. "Being forced to watch you two have sex in my bed."
"Is he gawking?" McCoy murmured.
"Obviously," said Spock. He would have expressed his approval for this suggested change in plan, but McCoy was already coaxing his tongue into Spock's mouth again.
"Almost any definition of sex would do it," said Jim.
"He is most persuasive," said Spock. He was also quite willing to consider watching McCoy, whose erection he could feel against his thigh, penetrate Jim as the latter bent over the desk. (Spock had never been able to understand the human compulsion to gape at other beings fornicating until he'd had the opportunity to observe Jim and McCoy.)
"Look, you want to have sex in Jim's bed, we'll just let ourselves in next time he has duty, and we don't," said McCoy. "Jim, keep your hands flat on the desk. But it's not going to punish him."
"You have said--"
"Shhh. He likes to bargain, especially when he knows I'm going to ignore him," McCoy whispered in Spock's ear. One of his hands rested on the small of Spock's back. "Come over to my place tomorrow night, and I'll take real good care of you--give you whatever you want." This low, pleasing whisper made Spock suspect that, had he been human, he would have lacked the discipline to wait (although his imagination might have been more worthy of such an offer). "But I promised Jim, and if he really wants to do something different, he knows what to say." McCoy squeezed his hand and kissed him lightly on the mouth. "Jim, when I look over there, you'd better be facing forward, and those hands better be flat on the desk."
"Yes, Bones."
"What the hell is this? You're up on your toes until either me or Spock says 'down.'"
"Why?" Spock asked.
"Aesthetics." McCoy took his hand and led him to the desk. "And because I told him to. Here," he drew an imaginary circle over Jim's ass, "is where you want to aim. You want to try to avoid hitting these," he squeezed Jim's testicles, "but nobody's perfect." McCoy squeezed again and drew back his hand. "And this is what it'll sound like."
It was louder than anticipated. Spock realized he had not actually expected McCoy to strike Jim until he actually witnessed it.
"Jim, you can explain the next part," McCoy said as he slapped the captain again.
"Warm up?" Jim asked.
"Very good, Jim." Another slap. "It won't help, but still..."
"Dr. McCoy is using a series of slower, lighter blows so that he can really beat the hell out of me later," said Jim.
"Don't say beat," said McCoy.
"Why not?" Jim's body rocked forward as McCoy slapped him again. "Other than because you told me not to, of course."
"Because Spock's a literal minded Vulcan who happens to be three times stronger than either of us?" McCoy asked. "Because you're a god damned masochist? And I don't actually get off on having to put you back together?"
"I suppose there's that...Dr. McCoy is administering a series of slower, lighter blows so that he can give me one hell of a spanking later?"
"Much better. Why can't you follow instructions all the time?"
"I don't know, Bones. It's like I want you to punish me."
"Well, it couldn't possibly be that." McCoy gave him a final slap and said to Spock, "Your turn. How many was that?"
"Thirteen," said Spock.
For some reason, McCoy slapped Jim's ass a fourteenth time. "Give him as many as I did," he said.
Spock considered his target and struck. The sound of impact was not as loud this time. McCoy wrapped his fingers around Spock's wrist and moved his arm back. "Little bit harder than that," he said. "You want to get him hard enough that he can feel it, but not so hard that he falls over. At least not yet." Spock attempted another slap. "Much better," said McCoy.
It was an odd sensation. Given McCoy's approval, Spock focused on counting the appropriate number of slaps rather than on his hand or his technique. "Fourteen," he said and moved so that McCoy could take his place.
"Down," said McCoy. "How's your hand?"
"I am not certain," said Spock. "I do not believe I am experiencing discomfort."
"There something you want to say to us, Jim?"
"I regret nothing," said Jim.
"Up," McCoy said and slapped him harder as soon as Jim was on his toes again. "Move your feet back a bit. How many are we doing?"
"Fourteen," said Jim.
"Count 'em. You lose count, we start over. Hit him on the number," McCoy said to Spock as Jim counted. "Otherwise it's easy to mess up and give him an extra."
"For a human, perhaps," said Spock. They ignored him. Jim continued to count, and McCoy continued to give him a slap with each number.
"Down." McCoy rubbed the small of Jim's back. "Can you go a little faster for Spock, Jim boy?"
"Okay, Bones," said Jim. "I assume it's too late to apologize?"
"After all the backtalk we've had to put up with?" Spock watched as McCoy's hand slid over Jim's hip and disappeared between his legs. "Sure doesn't feel like you're sorry." Jim whined and leaned into McCoy's hand; Spock wondered if human impulsiveness would take over as he watched McCoy's arm move. "You made your choice, Jim. Get back up so Spock can have his turn."
"One," said Jim.
Spock slapped him and said, "We were on fifteen, Jim." He glanced at McCoy to see if this was acceptable. McCoy grinned at him and nodded.
"Spock--"
Spock swatted him again. "I believe we have already established who discusses and who listens. You will begin again and count until we have reached twenty-eight."
After twenty Jim's voice began to falter, and Spock became acutely aware of his hand. His palm stung, and he suspected that he did not enjoy the discomfort as much as Jim apparently did.
Jim stumbled on twenty-six. Spock slapped him, hard enough that his hand ached, and said, "You will begin again with Dr. McCoy."
"You okay?" McCoy asked.
"Your suspicions were correct, Doctor," said Spock. He allowed the human to carefully take his wrist, although Spock doubted that a visual inspection would be particularly revealing.
"You just had to have those oversensitive Vulcan fingers." McCoy kissed his palm.
"You have not complained before."
"Is Spock all right?" Jim asked.
"Yeah, just a little sore." McCoy squeezed Jim with both hands. "I'm sure you know the feeling. From one, little bit faster this time."
Jim counted and moaned with each slap. He attempted to gasp out the final number, never managing to get past "twenty-" before McCoy finally slapped him and said, "Too slow."
"Bones, for god's sake..."
"Down. You'll get it eventually."
"I can't."
"Of course you can, Jim. Up." McCoy moved to the other side of the desk and petted him. "We'll just keep trying until you get it."
"Bones," Jim pleaded.
"You want to give it another go, Spock?" McCoy asked.
Spock visually analyzed Jim's flushed skin and his tensed body. "That would be acceptable."
"Hit his thigh," said McCoy. "Either just under his ass or between his legs."
"Thank you, Bones."
"He is counting?" Spock asked.
"He is counting," said McCoy. "Show us you can still count that high, Jim."
The sound of his hand slapping Jim's inner thigh was slightly different, almost high pitched if it were possible to describe a percussive sound in such a manner. He was strangely pleased when there was no need to start over. It almost made him consider the captain in a more positive manner (despite being a most illogical reason for doing so).
McCoy was still standing at the captain's head, caressing him in a way that reminded Spock of his human crewmates' sudden and irritating affection towards tribbles. "One more round," said McCoy. Jim made a small sound. "This was your god damned idea."
"Doctor, I think to emphasize the captain's status we should both penetrate him while he is in this position," said Spock.
"That's a fine idea, Spock," said McCoy. "Especially since I don't think he should be allowed to come."
"Spock, Bones--"
"What'd you do with the girl, Jim?" McCoy asked.
"Nothing," said Jim. "We just made out for a bit."
"Prove it."
"How am I--"
"Then you don't get to come. Shit, you're lucky to get a break."
"I have grown quite used to telepathic interaction," said Spock.
"Huh?" asked McCoy.
"If my partner does not achieve climax, I am not sure how long it will take me." He found McCoy's expression of interested lust and Jim's soft whimper most satisfactory.
"I'll help you get him ready," said McCoy. "Jim, you stay on your toes unless you want your ass to get even redder."
"Yes, Bones."
McCoy crouched behind Jim and spread him open. "I'll bet you want to fuck him with your fingers."
"I would find that satisfactory," said Spock.
"You know where everything is?" McCoy asked.
"Are you referring to the captain's anatomy or the sexual equipment?"
"You be careful with those euphemisms, Spock. Where I come from, those're the same thing."
"He seems unusually patient."
"Nah, Jim's real good. Especially once you remind him how he's supposed to act. And since he wants this--don't you, Jim?"
Given the positioning there was little to see, but based on what he could hear, Spock determined that McCoy was using his tongue most effectively. As Spock applied lubricant to his gloved fingers, Jim made a variety of inarticulate noises occasionally interspersed with McCoy's name.
"Finger him as long as you want," said McCoy. As he stood, he gave Jim a quick slap on the ass. "Watch those heels, darlin. You don't want to get caught slacking, do you?"
"Bones, I don't know if--"
"Should've thought of that before you decided to piss us off. Keep an eye on him, Spock. And if you want to finger him 'til you come, I can fuck him first."
Spock considered this remark as he teased Jim. Eventually--once he was able to thrust his index finger in and out of the captain--he determined that McCoy's statement had been one of encouragement.
"Sorry, Spock," McCoy said as he touched Spock's wrist. "Somebody forgot the rules."
Spock reluctantly removed his hand so McCoy could administer a series of hard slaps to Jim's ass. "Who told you to relax?" McCoy asked.
"My legs," said Jim.
"You know you're supposed to stretch before strenuous activity." McCoy paused with his hand still raised. "You going to apologize?"
"I'm sorry, Spock."
"Good boy." Spock could see Jim flinch as McCoy squeezed his ass. "On your toes."
Spock decided it would be logical to continue with two fingers.
"If I brushed my teeth, can I get a kiss?" McCoy asked.
Spock turned his head so that McCoy could kiss him. The human tasted of that strange thing humans referred to as mint.
"I have decided to take your suggestion and manipulate him manually until I achieve orgasm," said Spock. When McCoy kissed him again, Spock could taste his increased arousal.
"You getting him nice and ready for me?"
"As I am sure you are aware, the captain is quite pliable." Spock added a third finger.
"Don't stretch him out too much."
"I would ask the same of you, Doctor." Spock's other hand hesitated at McCoy's zipper. "May I?"
"Shit, Spock, you know you don't have to ask."
"Down," Spock said because he wished to concentrate entirely on the fingers inside Jim and the hand wrapped around McCoy's erection. "Doctor," he asked as his focus on these things began to seriously impair his control.
"Come on him," McCoy murmured against his lips. "I don't care where."
Spock quickly determined, given the location of his own hand and Jim's posture, that it would be most logical to come across his back. It was typically human that this action made McCoy seize his face and enthusiastically kiss him.
"Jim," McCoy said during a brief pause. "Jim, I'm going to fuck you."
"Yes, Bones." Jim stood on his toes again without being asked and tilted his hips. Spock had not thought it possible for the captain to be any more exposed until Jim repositioned himself.
"You want my cock, Jim boy?"
"Oh, please..."
"Then why do you keep screwing around?"
"I don't know." Jim made a soft, pleading noise as McCoy touched his hips. "I--"
"Shh." McCoy moved one hand from Jim's hip. "This want you want?"
Spock hardened as Jim moaned and tried to clutch the desk's smooth surface. "Yes," Jim said quietly and desperately, in a way that made Spock feel shamefully aroused. He found it most gratifying to watch--and decided that he did not need to ask for permission to place his hand on McCoy's shoulder and share his enjoyment.
"You want to meld?" McCoy asked.
"Oh god," Jim breathed.
"Yes," Spock said. "But I doubt I would be able to maintain my composure." His hand tightened as he watched McCoy pull out slightly only to slam back into Jim. This was insufficient contact. Spock slid his hand under the short sleeve of McCoy's undershirt and slowly exhaled--the human was quite close to climax. "I assume you intend to ejaculate inside him?"
"Yeah," McCoy said. "What'd I tell you about that?"
"I fail to see how my phrasing determines whether or not 'you all' intend to 'come' in his 'ass.'"
"That what you want, Jim?" McCoy asked. Jim seemed incapable of an articulate response. "Thought so. And you're going to take it all, aren't you?"
"If that is your intention, Doctor, then I will do the same," said Spock. The humans moaned almost in unison. Spock commended himself on his control. "I am curious to see what it is like to fuck him when his ass is full of your come," he said in McCoy's ear and was most pleased with the results.
McCoy cursed, and he pulled Jim by the hips. "Jesus, Spock, you keep talking like that..."
"I am most impatient," said Spock. He bent to kiss McCoy's parted lips, keeping one hand on the doctor's arm and placing the other on Jim's back. As anticipated, Jim was highly aroused and silently pleading for release, but there was an odd quality to his thoughts. Spock wondered if he should comment on it, but Jim seemed to wish for them to continue.
Spock quickly placed his hands on McCoy, concentrating on the sensations he could feel from the human. How strongly this might affect him was of no concern--Spock had a telepath's need to experience what his partner did, and human orgasms were usually most enjoyable.
McCoy moaned and Spock sighed with him, and Jim said, "Oh, that's not fair, Spock," as he guessed what they were doing.
It took Spock twenty-three seconds to straighten--he had apparently pressed his face to the crook of McCoy's shoulder--and determine that he had not actually climaxed. "Good god," McCoy whispered for what may have been the third or fourth time, ran his fingers through his hair, and pulled out.
"If you lie down, you will fall asleep," Spock said as he moved to penetrate Jim.
"You say that like it's a bad thing." McCoy dragged Jim's chair to the other side of the desk. Spock could see the faint scratches he'd left on the human's arm; McCoy did not seem to notice (if he had, he would likely have claimed the action had been emotional rather than purely reflexive).
Spock found he did not have to move cautiously. Jim was quite relaxed and slick with lubricant and another human's ejaculate. This was oddly satisfactory.
"Please let me come, Bones."
Both humans were leaning on the desk. Spock could not determine if Jim's eyes were open or closed. McCoy kept his eyes on Jim as he smiled and said, "Thought you liked getting fucked."
Spock considered how it felt to be acutely aware that Jim had already been penetrated by someone else. He decided it was agreeable, especially as he had been a somewhat passive participant in the earlier fucking, and Jim had been brought to such a high state of arousal that he practically hummed under Spock's fingertips.
He noticed when Jim began to urge him on--Jim and McCoy were not subtle when they tried to "speak" to Spock's telepathic sense, but it was not as if either of them could be and still attempt to control what he received. Spock was aware that Jim was concentrating on how much and how roughly he wished to be fucked for his own purposes, but it was still most appealing. Spock moved one of Jim's legs onto his hip and thrust as deep and fast as he could until he was the second being to climax inside Jim that evening.
When Spock blinked back his nictitating membrane, McCoy was looking at him again, his hand still protectively resting on Jim's head. "Still owe him another spanking."
"Damn it, Bones..."
Spock had learned enough of the game to know to reposition Jim and slap him on the ass for such a remark.
"Do the first half," said McCoy. "We'll count 'em. Let's say two extra for every bad word?"
Spock decided to do it quickly. He suspected it might be more painful, but he also knew how keenly Jim wished to be satisfied. "Does blaspheming count?"
"I'd say so," said McCoy.
"As part of your punishment, you will count, Jim," said Spock. "Given Dr. McCoy's sadistic nature, I assume any additional profanity will result in additional slaps."
"How many?" Jim asked.
"Ten," said Spock. "Assuming you will refrain from any additional profanity." Spock did not question the slowness of his pacing, only swung his hand and struck Jim's ass each time Jim said a number. Again he found the odd sense of satisfaction when they reached "ten" without incident.
"You hanging in there?" McCoy ran his hand over the curve of Jim's ass.
"Uh huh," said Jim.
"Normally when we get to no swearing you come up with all kinds of shit." Spock could not interpret McCoy's expression as he looked down at Jim. "Almost over, Jim boy. You take these--and watch that filthy mouth of yours--we'll make you come."
"Okay."
"Fourteen, darlin."
Spock would have expected McCoy to cheat (or, in Jim's vernacular "change the rules") and skip at least one of the strikes. He was not sure what to make of the fact that he was incorrect, and eventually dismissed it as merely McCoy's tendency to behave illogically.
"That's it. You can get up now, Jim boy. We're done with you."
Jim stood up awkwardly and stretched. "Are you?"
"We're done beating on you, anyway." McCoy hugged him. Jim seemed to cling to him. "You want Spock to rub your back while I get you off?"
"Please," Jim murmured against McCoy's neck.
Spock followed the humans the short distance to Jim's bed, pausing as they stopped to remove Jim's shirt.
"Tell me what you need," McCoy whispered as they sat down at the foot of the bed.
"I...god, I don't even care, Bones." He closed his eyes as McCoy started to slowly stroke him.
"That's all right. You don't have to worry about a thing, Jim." McCoy gave Spock an irritated look. Spock interpreted this as a sign that he should sit behind Jim and place his hands on his shoulders.
He was used to Jim moving in a manner not conducive to effective massage, and Jim seemed content to have the muscles of his shoulders rhythmically squeezed while McCoy stroked his cock and spoke to him.
"Not really mad at you, Jim boy. And you know Spock can't get angry at all," McCoy said.
Spock looked at him over Jim's shoulder, silently asking if he was expected to say anything. McCoy shrugged slightly as if to say that Spock could or McCoy could continue to speak for both of them. Spock willed him to understand. McCoy nodded and kissed Jim's lips and began his sentimental murmurings with "we". Spock's only contribution was not to deny the things McCoy said, but somehow the humans seemed to find this acceptable--possibly because this seemed to be a transitional state.
"You going to come for us, Jim?" McCoy asked just as gently as he had asserted friendship. "Don't tell me you already forgot how to do what you're told."
"Don't stop," said Jim. "Please just keep going..."
"Of course, Jim. You know we really want to get you off--shame we had to spend all that time reminding you who's boss when we could've been making you feel good."
Jim climaxed with a groan. After fifty-eight seconds of Jim slumping, his hands on his own knees, the humans embraced again. "Bones?"
"Yeah, Jim?"
"No more specific stuff."
"Okay, Jim. But we didn't mean any of it anyway."
"I know."
"I'm real fond of you, Jim."
"I'm quite fond of you too, Bones. And Spock."
McCoy sighed. "I guess I can put up with Spock if I have to."
"Good. Because you do."
McCoy had started to stroke Jim's hair again. "Jim?"
"Mmm?"
"I really like fucking you."
"Don't you mean you really fucking like me?"
"No."
The humans giggled, and their arms tightened around each other. "Forgot to tell you," McCoy said to Spock. "After we administer a severe beating, we make nice."
"What exactly does it mean to 'make nice?'" Spock asked.
Jim smiled at him. "Whatever you think it should mean, Spock. There is one thing though..."
"Yes, Jim?"
"Spock, what the hell happened to that backrub?"
The humans repositioned--Jim stretched out on his stomach, and Spock resumed massaging. "How often do we administer a severe beating?" Spock asked.
"As often as it takes," Jim mumbled.
"Can't you at least try being a good boy?" McCoy asked. Shortly after Spock had resumed massaging, McCoy had re-initiated petting Jim's hair. Spock decided that this was one of the many bizarre affection rituals of humans and that there would be no point in asking.
"Doctor, you indicated that this activity is not performed when one is 'pissed off,'" said Spock.
"Yeah?"
"Then, if anything, positive behavior is required."
McCoy sighed. His expression indicated he was on the verge of a typical illogical outburst. "It's complicated," said Jim.
"No, it isn't," said McCoy.
Jim yawned and shifted under Spock's fingers. "Isn't it?"
"No, you like getting your ass beat, and you like it when I call you that," said McCoy.
"I suppose you're right."
"Course I'm right."
Spock decided that it was still somewhat complicated, but he would require additional experience before he was adequately prepared to discuss it. Possibly a great deal of observation and practice, but he assumed his friends would indulge him.
Only I figured it might as well be Kirk getting (consensually) spanked by McCoy AND Spock.
Spock listened to the explanation. Naturally, being a Vulcan, he was not at all distracted by the fact that McCoy had removed his uniform shirt during said explanation. "And this is enjoyable?"
McCoy laughed. "Well, don't knock it 'til you've tried it."
"The captain will find this acceptable?"
"Oh, yes. We've already worked out the details." McCoy bounced slightly. "The fact that he got out of line on the away mission is just a happy coincidence."
"The girl?"
"The girl."
"Doctor, I was not aware that there had been any discussion of..." Spock struggled to find the most accurate phrasing. The Vulcan way was far simpler--Spock was bonded to neither human, and thus it was impossible that he could be engaging in sexual intercourse with either one of them. As for the issue of "getting out of line", a full bond meant an exclusive sexual relationship until the death of one partner (although Spock's father and other members of their family had somehow been able to find perfectly logical means to circumvent this assumption).
As for the human way, there were an excessive number of terms and degrees. Spock had only been able to rule out the terminology that was almost always coded as female.
"If any...obligations have been set, I was not present at the time," Spock said.
McCoy looked at him as if Spock were mentally impaired. "The hell are you on about?"
"I have neither requested nor received a promise to refrain from fornicating with additional beings."
"Oh. No, I didn't think you had."
"And you have not?"
"No, of course not. I mean, that'd make things pretty awkward, wouldn't it?"
Spock found himself most interested in the statues by the captain's desk as he said, "I had assumed such an agreement would place restrictions on additional beings other than ourselves."
"Well, like you said, Spock, if anybody's made that agreement, I wasn't there to sign off on it."
"Then you intend to punish the captain for breaking a rule that does not exist."
"Exactly."
"Explain."
"Spock, this isn't something you do when you're really pissed," said McCoy. "And Jim doesn't cheat. Don't give me that look." Apparently it was acceptable to joke about the captain's rule breaking in every area except the romantic. "You set the obligations, Jim'll stick to 'em."
Spock considered this. "It is more enjoyable because it is a pretense?"
"That's right. And I think he'll like this a whole lot better than whatever bullshit I was going to make up."
"I fail to see how one pretense would be more appealing than another," said Spock.
"It's...you're saying that he's yours."
"Ours." Spock held out his fingers for a kiss. "Obviously I will require your assistance to administer a suitably severe beating."
"Spanking." McCoy kissed him with his fingertips. "Severe beating...don't you do anything unless I tell you to."
"Yes, Doctor." Spock slowly kissed his knuckles.
"You ever slapped anybody?"
"You are attempting to determine if I will find it painful to repeatedly slap another being's buttocks."
"Goes on long enough and I'll find it painful. Even with human hands."
Spock had been about to kiss McCoy's hand with his mouth. "Is that a hint?"
"No. And what'd I tell you about sounding like an anatomy textbook?"
"Perhaps a better physician would have a finer appreciation for accurate terminology."
"You want me to bend you over my knee, just say so."
Spock looked up from the distal phalanxes of McCoy's first three fingers. "Is there some sexual component to the human knee that I am unaware of?"
McCoy sighed. "It is the traditional Earth location for hobgoblins who need a severe beating administered to their green buttocks."
Spock considered this scenario as he traced the creases of McCoy's palm.
"Your hands, Spock. We were talking about your hands," said McCoy. "I don't want you making yourself miserable just because--"
"The captain, however..."
"Oh, don't worry about him."
"Worry about who?" Jim asked. He grinned at them. "Started without me? I thought I made it very clear," he took Spock's hand from McCoy, "that you aren't allowed to start without me. Unless I get to find you in a very compromising position." He stroked Spock's fingers and kissed McCoy with his mouth.
"You ready, Jim?" McCoy asked.
"Hold on." Spock watched as the humans kissed again. "Now I'm ready."
McCoy seized Jim's collar. "Allowed's a very interesting word, Jim. You think you're allowed to run off with any humanoid who'll take you?"
"Bones, I can--"
"Shut up. Spock, what the hell are we going to do with him?"
"Obviously we cannot allow this behavior to continue," said Spock. He felt it would have been preferable to watch the humans' illogical method of kissing while one or both of them stroked his fingers.
"You remember what happens when you don't behave?" McCoy asked.
"Can't we discuss this?" Jim asked.
"This is part of the problem, Jim." McCoy seemed to be reaching for Spock. When Spock moved closer, McCoy took his hand and raised it to his mouth. "Spock and I discuss things." He sucked on the tip of Spock's index finger for an insufficient duration. When Spock indicated his disapproval, McCoy smiled fondly at him and kissed his cheek with the backs of his fingers. "But you, Jim, you're supposed to do what we say."
"Oh?" Jim was smiling again. "And if you say one thing, and Spock says another--"
McCoy grabbed Jim's shirt, gripping it so tightly that Spock could hear the strain on the seams. "Then you'd better hope you can do both at the same time."
"I do not believe I am familiar with what happens when the captain fails to follow instructions," said Spock. He found it fascinating that his feigned ignorance seemed to amuse and delight the humans as much as it did, just as he was fascinated by the similarity between the pretense and the nature of their professional relationship.
"An old Earth custom known as a spanking," said McCoy. He let go of Jim's shirt and stroked the back of Spock's hand.
"It is in no way related to a severe beating?"
McCoy stuck his tongue out at him. "Jesus, Bones, what've you been telling him?" Jim asked.
"I thought I told you to be quiet," said McCoy. He turned back to Spock. "Usually he gets bent over my knee--he lies across my lap--or in this case, yours."
"Given the nature of the offense, I do not believe he deserves that level of physical contact," said Spock.
McCoy beamed at him. "I think you're right, Spock."
"I'm sorry, did I make it back to the right ship?" Jim asked. "I could swear I just heard Leonard McCoy say that Spock was--"
"Jim, drop your pants and bend over the desk. I knew you'd be a quick study," he said to Spock in a low voice. As McCoy kissed him with his mouth and the fingers of both hands, Spock kept one eye on Jim. Repeated open handed blows to the 'ass' were not the first possibility that came to mind when Jim bent over the desk.
"Do you know what would really teach me a lesson?" Jim asked.. "Being forced to watch you two have sex in my bed."
"Is he gawking?" McCoy murmured.
"Obviously," said Spock. He would have expressed his approval for this suggested change in plan, but McCoy was already coaxing his tongue into Spock's mouth again.
"Almost any definition of sex would do it," said Jim.
"He is most persuasive," said Spock. He was also quite willing to consider watching McCoy, whose erection he could feel against his thigh, penetrate Jim as the latter bent over the desk. (Spock had never been able to understand the human compulsion to gape at other beings fornicating until he'd had the opportunity to observe Jim and McCoy.)
"Look, you want to have sex in Jim's bed, we'll just let ourselves in next time he has duty, and we don't," said McCoy. "Jim, keep your hands flat on the desk. But it's not going to punish him."
"You have said--"
"Shhh. He likes to bargain, especially when he knows I'm going to ignore him," McCoy whispered in Spock's ear. One of his hands rested on the small of Spock's back. "Come over to my place tomorrow night, and I'll take real good care of you--give you whatever you want." This low, pleasing whisper made Spock suspect that, had he been human, he would have lacked the discipline to wait (although his imagination might have been more worthy of such an offer). "But I promised Jim, and if he really wants to do something different, he knows what to say." McCoy squeezed his hand and kissed him lightly on the mouth. "Jim, when I look over there, you'd better be facing forward, and those hands better be flat on the desk."
"Yes, Bones."
"What the hell is this? You're up on your toes until either me or Spock says 'down.'"
"Why?" Spock asked.
"Aesthetics." McCoy took his hand and led him to the desk. "And because I told him to. Here," he drew an imaginary circle over Jim's ass, "is where you want to aim. You want to try to avoid hitting these," he squeezed Jim's testicles, "but nobody's perfect." McCoy squeezed again and drew back his hand. "And this is what it'll sound like."
It was louder than anticipated. Spock realized he had not actually expected McCoy to strike Jim until he actually witnessed it.
"Jim, you can explain the next part," McCoy said as he slapped the captain again.
"Warm up?" Jim asked.
"Very good, Jim." Another slap. "It won't help, but still..."
"Dr. McCoy is using a series of slower, lighter blows so that he can really beat the hell out of me later," said Jim.
"Don't say beat," said McCoy.
"Why not?" Jim's body rocked forward as McCoy slapped him again. "Other than because you told me not to, of course."
"Because Spock's a literal minded Vulcan who happens to be three times stronger than either of us?" McCoy asked. "Because you're a god damned masochist? And I don't actually get off on having to put you back together?"
"I suppose there's that...Dr. McCoy is administering a series of slower, lighter blows so that he can give me one hell of a spanking later?"
"Much better. Why can't you follow instructions all the time?"
"I don't know, Bones. It's like I want you to punish me."
"Well, it couldn't possibly be that." McCoy gave him a final slap and said to Spock, "Your turn. How many was that?"
"Thirteen," said Spock.
For some reason, McCoy slapped Jim's ass a fourteenth time. "Give him as many as I did," he said.
Spock considered his target and struck. The sound of impact was not as loud this time. McCoy wrapped his fingers around Spock's wrist and moved his arm back. "Little bit harder than that," he said. "You want to get him hard enough that he can feel it, but not so hard that he falls over. At least not yet." Spock attempted another slap. "Much better," said McCoy.
It was an odd sensation. Given McCoy's approval, Spock focused on counting the appropriate number of slaps rather than on his hand or his technique. "Fourteen," he said and moved so that McCoy could take his place.
"Down," said McCoy. "How's your hand?"
"I am not certain," said Spock. "I do not believe I am experiencing discomfort."
"There something you want to say to us, Jim?"
"I regret nothing," said Jim.
"Up," McCoy said and slapped him harder as soon as Jim was on his toes again. "Move your feet back a bit. How many are we doing?"
"Fourteen," said Jim.
"Count 'em. You lose count, we start over. Hit him on the number," McCoy said to Spock as Jim counted. "Otherwise it's easy to mess up and give him an extra."
"For a human, perhaps," said Spock. They ignored him. Jim continued to count, and McCoy continued to give him a slap with each number.
"Down." McCoy rubbed the small of Jim's back. "Can you go a little faster for Spock, Jim boy?"
"Okay, Bones," said Jim. "I assume it's too late to apologize?"
"After all the backtalk we've had to put up with?" Spock watched as McCoy's hand slid over Jim's hip and disappeared between his legs. "Sure doesn't feel like you're sorry." Jim whined and leaned into McCoy's hand; Spock wondered if human impulsiveness would take over as he watched McCoy's arm move. "You made your choice, Jim. Get back up so Spock can have his turn."
"One," said Jim.
Spock slapped him and said, "We were on fifteen, Jim." He glanced at McCoy to see if this was acceptable. McCoy grinned at him and nodded.
"Spock--"
Spock swatted him again. "I believe we have already established who discusses and who listens. You will begin again and count until we have reached twenty-eight."
After twenty Jim's voice began to falter, and Spock became acutely aware of his hand. His palm stung, and he suspected that he did not enjoy the discomfort as much as Jim apparently did.
Jim stumbled on twenty-six. Spock slapped him, hard enough that his hand ached, and said, "You will begin again with Dr. McCoy."
"You okay?" McCoy asked.
"Your suspicions were correct, Doctor," said Spock. He allowed the human to carefully take his wrist, although Spock doubted that a visual inspection would be particularly revealing.
"You just had to have those oversensitive Vulcan fingers." McCoy kissed his palm.
"You have not complained before."
"Is Spock all right?" Jim asked.
"Yeah, just a little sore." McCoy squeezed Jim with both hands. "I'm sure you know the feeling. From one, little bit faster this time."
Jim counted and moaned with each slap. He attempted to gasp out the final number, never managing to get past "twenty-" before McCoy finally slapped him and said, "Too slow."
"Bones, for god's sake..."
"Down. You'll get it eventually."
"I can't."
"Of course you can, Jim. Up." McCoy moved to the other side of the desk and petted him. "We'll just keep trying until you get it."
"Bones," Jim pleaded.
"You want to give it another go, Spock?" McCoy asked.
Spock visually analyzed Jim's flushed skin and his tensed body. "That would be acceptable."
"Hit his thigh," said McCoy. "Either just under his ass or between his legs."
"Thank you, Bones."
"He is counting?" Spock asked.
"He is counting," said McCoy. "Show us you can still count that high, Jim."
The sound of his hand slapping Jim's inner thigh was slightly different, almost high pitched if it were possible to describe a percussive sound in such a manner. He was strangely pleased when there was no need to start over. It almost made him consider the captain in a more positive manner (despite being a most illogical reason for doing so).
McCoy was still standing at the captain's head, caressing him in a way that reminded Spock of his human crewmates' sudden and irritating affection towards tribbles. "One more round," said McCoy. Jim made a small sound. "This was your god damned idea."
"Doctor, I think to emphasize the captain's status we should both penetrate him while he is in this position," said Spock.
"That's a fine idea, Spock," said McCoy. "Especially since I don't think he should be allowed to come."
"Spock, Bones--"
"What'd you do with the girl, Jim?" McCoy asked.
"Nothing," said Jim. "We just made out for a bit."
"Prove it."
"How am I--"
"Then you don't get to come. Shit, you're lucky to get a break."
"I have grown quite used to telepathic interaction," said Spock.
"Huh?" asked McCoy.
"If my partner does not achieve climax, I am not sure how long it will take me." He found McCoy's expression of interested lust and Jim's soft whimper most satisfactory.
"I'll help you get him ready," said McCoy. "Jim, you stay on your toes unless you want your ass to get even redder."
"Yes, Bones."
McCoy crouched behind Jim and spread him open. "I'll bet you want to fuck him with your fingers."
"I would find that satisfactory," said Spock.
"You know where everything is?" McCoy asked.
"Are you referring to the captain's anatomy or the sexual equipment?"
"You be careful with those euphemisms, Spock. Where I come from, those're the same thing."
"He seems unusually patient."
"Nah, Jim's real good. Especially once you remind him how he's supposed to act. And since he wants this--don't you, Jim?"
Given the positioning there was little to see, but based on what he could hear, Spock determined that McCoy was using his tongue most effectively. As Spock applied lubricant to his gloved fingers, Jim made a variety of inarticulate noises occasionally interspersed with McCoy's name.
"Finger him as long as you want," said McCoy. As he stood, he gave Jim a quick slap on the ass. "Watch those heels, darlin. You don't want to get caught slacking, do you?"
"Bones, I don't know if--"
"Should've thought of that before you decided to piss us off. Keep an eye on him, Spock. And if you want to finger him 'til you come, I can fuck him first."
Spock considered this remark as he teased Jim. Eventually--once he was able to thrust his index finger in and out of the captain--he determined that McCoy's statement had been one of encouragement.
"Sorry, Spock," McCoy said as he touched Spock's wrist. "Somebody forgot the rules."
Spock reluctantly removed his hand so McCoy could administer a series of hard slaps to Jim's ass. "Who told you to relax?" McCoy asked.
"My legs," said Jim.
"You know you're supposed to stretch before strenuous activity." McCoy paused with his hand still raised. "You going to apologize?"
"I'm sorry, Spock."
"Good boy." Spock could see Jim flinch as McCoy squeezed his ass. "On your toes."
Spock decided it would be logical to continue with two fingers.
"If I brushed my teeth, can I get a kiss?" McCoy asked.
Spock turned his head so that McCoy could kiss him. The human tasted of that strange thing humans referred to as mint.
"I have decided to take your suggestion and manipulate him manually until I achieve orgasm," said Spock. When McCoy kissed him again, Spock could taste his increased arousal.
"You getting him nice and ready for me?"
"As I am sure you are aware, the captain is quite pliable." Spock added a third finger.
"Don't stretch him out too much."
"I would ask the same of you, Doctor." Spock's other hand hesitated at McCoy's zipper. "May I?"
"Shit, Spock, you know you don't have to ask."
"Down," Spock said because he wished to concentrate entirely on the fingers inside Jim and the hand wrapped around McCoy's erection. "Doctor," he asked as his focus on these things began to seriously impair his control.
"Come on him," McCoy murmured against his lips. "I don't care where."
Spock quickly determined, given the location of his own hand and Jim's posture, that it would be most logical to come across his back. It was typically human that this action made McCoy seize his face and enthusiastically kiss him.
"Jim," McCoy said during a brief pause. "Jim, I'm going to fuck you."
"Yes, Bones." Jim stood on his toes again without being asked and tilted his hips. Spock had not thought it possible for the captain to be any more exposed until Jim repositioned himself.
"You want my cock, Jim boy?"
"Oh, please..."
"Then why do you keep screwing around?"
"I don't know." Jim made a soft, pleading noise as McCoy touched his hips. "I--"
"Shh." McCoy moved one hand from Jim's hip. "This want you want?"
Spock hardened as Jim moaned and tried to clutch the desk's smooth surface. "Yes," Jim said quietly and desperately, in a way that made Spock feel shamefully aroused. He found it most gratifying to watch--and decided that he did not need to ask for permission to place his hand on McCoy's shoulder and share his enjoyment.
"You want to meld?" McCoy asked.
"Oh god," Jim breathed.
"Yes," Spock said. "But I doubt I would be able to maintain my composure." His hand tightened as he watched McCoy pull out slightly only to slam back into Jim. This was insufficient contact. Spock slid his hand under the short sleeve of McCoy's undershirt and slowly exhaled--the human was quite close to climax. "I assume you intend to ejaculate inside him?"
"Yeah," McCoy said. "What'd I tell you about that?"
"I fail to see how my phrasing determines whether or not 'you all' intend to 'come' in his 'ass.'"
"That what you want, Jim?" McCoy asked. Jim seemed incapable of an articulate response. "Thought so. And you're going to take it all, aren't you?"
"If that is your intention, Doctor, then I will do the same," said Spock. The humans moaned almost in unison. Spock commended himself on his control. "I am curious to see what it is like to fuck him when his ass is full of your come," he said in McCoy's ear and was most pleased with the results.
McCoy cursed, and he pulled Jim by the hips. "Jesus, Spock, you keep talking like that..."
"I am most impatient," said Spock. He bent to kiss McCoy's parted lips, keeping one hand on the doctor's arm and placing the other on Jim's back. As anticipated, Jim was highly aroused and silently pleading for release, but there was an odd quality to his thoughts. Spock wondered if he should comment on it, but Jim seemed to wish for them to continue.
Spock quickly placed his hands on McCoy, concentrating on the sensations he could feel from the human. How strongly this might affect him was of no concern--Spock had a telepath's need to experience what his partner did, and human orgasms were usually most enjoyable.
McCoy moaned and Spock sighed with him, and Jim said, "Oh, that's not fair, Spock," as he guessed what they were doing.
It took Spock twenty-three seconds to straighten--he had apparently pressed his face to the crook of McCoy's shoulder--and determine that he had not actually climaxed. "Good god," McCoy whispered for what may have been the third or fourth time, ran his fingers through his hair, and pulled out.
"If you lie down, you will fall asleep," Spock said as he moved to penetrate Jim.
"You say that like it's a bad thing." McCoy dragged Jim's chair to the other side of the desk. Spock could see the faint scratches he'd left on the human's arm; McCoy did not seem to notice (if he had, he would likely have claimed the action had been emotional rather than purely reflexive).
Spock found he did not have to move cautiously. Jim was quite relaxed and slick with lubricant and another human's ejaculate. This was oddly satisfactory.
"Please let me come, Bones."
Both humans were leaning on the desk. Spock could not determine if Jim's eyes were open or closed. McCoy kept his eyes on Jim as he smiled and said, "Thought you liked getting fucked."
Spock considered how it felt to be acutely aware that Jim had already been penetrated by someone else. He decided it was agreeable, especially as he had been a somewhat passive participant in the earlier fucking, and Jim had been brought to such a high state of arousal that he practically hummed under Spock's fingertips.
He noticed when Jim began to urge him on--Jim and McCoy were not subtle when they tried to "speak" to Spock's telepathic sense, but it was not as if either of them could be and still attempt to control what he received. Spock was aware that Jim was concentrating on how much and how roughly he wished to be fucked for his own purposes, but it was still most appealing. Spock moved one of Jim's legs onto his hip and thrust as deep and fast as he could until he was the second being to climax inside Jim that evening.
When Spock blinked back his nictitating membrane, McCoy was looking at him again, his hand still protectively resting on Jim's head. "Still owe him another spanking."
"Damn it, Bones..."
Spock had learned enough of the game to know to reposition Jim and slap him on the ass for such a remark.
"Do the first half," said McCoy. "We'll count 'em. Let's say two extra for every bad word?"
Spock decided to do it quickly. He suspected it might be more painful, but he also knew how keenly Jim wished to be satisfied. "Does blaspheming count?"
"I'd say so," said McCoy.
"As part of your punishment, you will count, Jim," said Spock. "Given Dr. McCoy's sadistic nature, I assume any additional profanity will result in additional slaps."
"How many?" Jim asked.
"Ten," said Spock. "Assuming you will refrain from any additional profanity." Spock did not question the slowness of his pacing, only swung his hand and struck Jim's ass each time Jim said a number. Again he found the odd sense of satisfaction when they reached "ten" without incident.
"You hanging in there?" McCoy ran his hand over the curve of Jim's ass.
"Uh huh," said Jim.
"Normally when we get to no swearing you come up with all kinds of shit." Spock could not interpret McCoy's expression as he looked down at Jim. "Almost over, Jim boy. You take these--and watch that filthy mouth of yours--we'll make you come."
"Okay."
"Fourteen, darlin."
Spock would have expected McCoy to cheat (or, in Jim's vernacular "change the rules") and skip at least one of the strikes. He was not sure what to make of the fact that he was incorrect, and eventually dismissed it as merely McCoy's tendency to behave illogically.
"That's it. You can get up now, Jim boy. We're done with you."
Jim stood up awkwardly and stretched. "Are you?"
"We're done beating on you, anyway." McCoy hugged him. Jim seemed to cling to him. "You want Spock to rub your back while I get you off?"
"Please," Jim murmured against McCoy's neck.
Spock followed the humans the short distance to Jim's bed, pausing as they stopped to remove Jim's shirt.
"Tell me what you need," McCoy whispered as they sat down at the foot of the bed.
"I...god, I don't even care, Bones." He closed his eyes as McCoy started to slowly stroke him.
"That's all right. You don't have to worry about a thing, Jim." McCoy gave Spock an irritated look. Spock interpreted this as a sign that he should sit behind Jim and place his hands on his shoulders.
He was used to Jim moving in a manner not conducive to effective massage, and Jim seemed content to have the muscles of his shoulders rhythmically squeezed while McCoy stroked his cock and spoke to him.
"Not really mad at you, Jim boy. And you know Spock can't get angry at all," McCoy said.
Spock looked at him over Jim's shoulder, silently asking if he was expected to say anything. McCoy shrugged slightly as if to say that Spock could or McCoy could continue to speak for both of them. Spock willed him to understand. McCoy nodded and kissed Jim's lips and began his sentimental murmurings with "we". Spock's only contribution was not to deny the things McCoy said, but somehow the humans seemed to find this acceptable--possibly because this seemed to be a transitional state.
"You going to come for us, Jim?" McCoy asked just as gently as he had asserted friendship. "Don't tell me you already forgot how to do what you're told."
"Don't stop," said Jim. "Please just keep going..."
"Of course, Jim. You know we really want to get you off--shame we had to spend all that time reminding you who's boss when we could've been making you feel good."
Jim climaxed with a groan. After fifty-eight seconds of Jim slumping, his hands on his own knees, the humans embraced again. "Bones?"
"Yeah, Jim?"
"No more specific stuff."
"Okay, Jim. But we didn't mean any of it anyway."
"I know."
"I'm real fond of you, Jim."
"I'm quite fond of you too, Bones. And Spock."
McCoy sighed. "I guess I can put up with Spock if I have to."
"Good. Because you do."
McCoy had started to stroke Jim's hair again. "Jim?"
"Mmm?"
"I really like fucking you."
"Don't you mean you really fucking like me?"
"No."
The humans giggled, and their arms tightened around each other. "Forgot to tell you," McCoy said to Spock. "After we administer a severe beating, we make nice."
"What exactly does it mean to 'make nice?'" Spock asked.
Jim smiled at him. "Whatever you think it should mean, Spock. There is one thing though..."
"Yes, Jim?"
"Spock, what the hell happened to that backrub?"
The humans repositioned--Jim stretched out on his stomach, and Spock resumed massaging. "How often do we administer a severe beating?" Spock asked.
"As often as it takes," Jim mumbled.
"Can't you at least try being a good boy?" McCoy asked. Shortly after Spock had resumed massaging, McCoy had re-initiated petting Jim's hair. Spock decided that this was one of the many bizarre affection rituals of humans and that there would be no point in asking.
"Doctor, you indicated that this activity is not performed when one is 'pissed off,'" said Spock.
"Yeah?"
"Then, if anything, positive behavior is required."
McCoy sighed. His expression indicated he was on the verge of a typical illogical outburst. "It's complicated," said Jim.
"No, it isn't," said McCoy.
Jim yawned and shifted under Spock's fingers. "Isn't it?"
"No, you like getting your ass beat, and you like it when I call you that," said McCoy.
"I suppose you're right."
"Course I'm right."
Spock decided that it was still somewhat complicated, but he would require additional experience before he was adequately prepared to discuss it. Possibly a great deal of observation and practice, but he assumed his friends would indulge him.