Most random convo ever
Okay...so I was talking to my friend Evan earlier tonight and he was telling me how he needed a boyfriend. I told him to look outside the school. He said he was so I told him to look harder (I was kidding, don't worry). The following cracktastic conversation took place:
Evan: hahaha
Evan: ok FINE kala ill go out on college road and hold up a sign
Evan: "BE MY BOYFRIEND PLZ?"
Me: there you go, think outside the box
Evan: or be like the homeless dude outside wal-mart
Evan: "boyfriendless. anything helps. god bless!"
Me: LMAO
Me: I'll stand out there with you and hold a sign that says "<--WHAT HE SAID. KTHNX"
Evan: hahahahaha
Evan: that would so completely work
Evan: some 50-year old dude drives up
Evan: "you want a popsicles? ive got some popsicles in the back..."
Me: Haha. And then some grungy sketch 30 yr. old comes up and says "I'll take you both for 5 dollars"
Evan: then he ends up like
Evan: whoring us out on the streets of ethiopia
Me: and we'd get AIDS
Evan: then the military comes and rescues us
Evan: and disney is like
Evan: "so lets make a movie about your life"
Me: but they'd only rescue us AFTER we got AIDS so the story would be more tradgic and really they had a secret plan with Disney all the time so they could get their movie
Me: and the military tells us to do the movie or go back to Ethiopia
Me: and we're like goddamit
Evan: so we do the movie
Evan: and its a smash hit
Me: and then everyone wants to date us because we looked so hot
Me: and we spread AIDS across the planet
Evan: then everyone dies
Evan: and jesus comes for the 2nd time
Evan: and no one's there
Evan: so he's like
Evan: "fuck this."
Me: and he dies too
Evan: then god is like "OMGWTF... jesus died? god damnit... whoa, i just damned myself."
Evan: then he dies
Me: and then the universe implodes
Evan: all because of us holding a sign up on college road
Me: yep
Me: we rock
Evan: then harry potter is like "kala OMG you are so sexy."
Me: yeah, because I got thrown into the HP universe when I died
Evan: basically
Me: ...along with you of course
Evan: of course
Me: and we don't have AIDS anymore because...we're dead now and all maladies are cured in death
Evan: yes
Evan: and oliver wood is all like
Evan: "so yeah, im gay, and i want to go out with evan"
Evan: and everyone knows i'm a sucker for a scottish accent
Me: but of course
Evan: then draco is like "
Evan: "wtf, i want some evan too"
Me: heeey
Me: Draco's mine
Evan: pshhhh
Me: and then there'd be a beat down between us because we both wanted Draco
Me: and Harry would be like WTF I though you were mine
Evan: and then draco would be like
Evan: "GUYS!!!! stop it... im BI"
Evan: so then draco turns into a little manwhore
Me: But he is, of course, exclusively our manwhore
Me: aside from the occasional show he puts on for us with Harry
Me: because Harry was jealous and wanted in on the fun
Evan: harry could join in any time he wanted
Evan: wow.
You know you secretly like it >.>
♥
Evan: hahaha
Evan: ok FINE kala ill go out on college road and hold up a sign
Evan: "BE MY BOYFRIEND PLZ?"
Me: there you go, think outside the box
Evan: or be like the homeless dude outside wal-mart
Evan: "boyfriendless. anything helps. god bless!"
Me: LMAO
Me: I'll stand out there with you and hold a sign that says "<--WHAT HE SAID. KTHNX"
Evan: hahahahaha
Evan: that would so completely work
Evan: some 50-year old dude drives up
Evan: "you want a popsicles? ive got some popsicles in the back..."
Me: Haha. And then some grungy sketch 30 yr. old comes up and says "I'll take you both for 5 dollars"
Evan: then he ends up like
Evan: whoring us out on the streets of ethiopia
Me: and we'd get AIDS
Evan: then the military comes and rescues us
Evan: and disney is like
Evan: "so lets make a movie about your life"
Me: but they'd only rescue us AFTER we got AIDS so the story would be more tradgic and really they had a secret plan with Disney all the time so they could get their movie
Me: and the military tells us to do the movie or go back to Ethiopia
Me: and we're like goddamit
Evan: so we do the movie
Evan: and its a smash hit
Me: and then everyone wants to date us because we looked so hot
Me: and we spread AIDS across the planet
Evan: then everyone dies
Evan: and jesus comes for the 2nd time
Evan: and no one's there
Evan: so he's like
Evan: "fuck this."
Me: and he dies too
Evan: then god is like "OMGWTF... jesus died? god damnit... whoa, i just damned myself."
Evan: then he dies
Me: and then the universe implodes
Evan: all because of us holding a sign up on college road
Me: yep
Me: we rock
Evan: then harry potter is like "kala OMG you are so sexy."
Me: yeah, because I got thrown into the HP universe when I died
Evan: basically
Me: ...along with you of course
Evan: of course
Me: and we don't have AIDS anymore because...we're dead now and all maladies are cured in death
Evan: yes
Evan: and oliver wood is all like
Evan: "so yeah, im gay, and i want to go out with evan"
Evan: and everyone knows i'm a sucker for a scottish accent
Me: but of course
Evan: then draco is like "
Evan: "wtf, i want some evan too"
Me: heeey
Me: Draco's mine
Evan: pshhhh
Me: and then there'd be a beat down between us because we both wanted Draco
Me: and Harry would be like WTF I though you were mine
Evan: and then draco would be like
Evan: "GUYS!!!! stop it... im BI"
Evan: so then draco turns into a little manwhore
Me: But he is, of course, exclusively our manwhore
Me: aside from the occasional show he puts on for us with Harry
Me: because Harry was jealous and wanted in on the fun
Evan: harry could join in any time he wanted
Evan: wow.
You know you secretly like it >.>
♥