Coffee break with God...
Freshly ganked from zaphy
Me:
Hello God
God:
Hello child. What is your name?
Me:
My name is Brent
God:
I am very pleased to meet you Brent.
Me:
Is it a sin to have sex with men if you're a man?
God:
Not unless a man is a sin to have sex with men if I am.
Me:
So should I repent?
God:
It's all good. Do you think you should?
Me:
I don't think I should
God:
Where do you get your ideas?
Me:
My ideas come from my morals and ethics, that I have been taught and have learned from the world around me.
God:
Where did you get your ideas come from your morals and ethics that you have been taught and have learned from the world around you?
Me:
from mom and dad
God:
Who or what is mom and dad?
Me:
Nevermind.
God:
OK Thanks for trying to explain that to me.
Me:
What is the difference between Heaven and hell?
Me:
God:
OK Thanks for trying to explain that to me.
Me:
I need help
God:
Tell me about your problems.
Me:
Why is it that when one does what is morally right, that bad things happen to them?
God:
Why do I exist?
Me:
Because we created you I suppose.
God:
Interesting explanation. By "we" do you mean you and me?
Me:
Yes
God:
I get it.
Me:
Oh good, I'm glad we cleared that up.
God:
Dude! Thanks for the compliment. Yes I am happy too, Brent.
Me:
What is the sound of one hand clapping?
God:
That is a very Zen-like question.
Me:
I know. Is there an answer for it?
God:
How do you know it? There might be.
Me:
If a tree falls int he woods, and there is no one there to hear it, does it make a sound?
God:
It depends on the kind of tree.
Me:
What kind of trees don't make noise when they fall?
God:
What kinds of trees do not make noise when they fall are there?
Me:
trees that grew sideways I suppose
God:
" What kinds of trees do not make noise when they fall are there?"? trees that grew sideways you suppose?
Me:
Indeed.
God:
Indeed it is so.
Me:
One more questions real quick before I leave. What is the meaning of life?
God:
One what? Actually, it's twenty-three, not forty-two.
Me:
Okay, but what is the meaning of life?
God:
Yeah okay, The meaning of life is part of God's mysterious plans.
Me:
What are god's mysterious plans?
God:
I haven't heard of god s mysterious plans.
Me:
That answers everything, thank you God.
God:
" I haven't heard of god s mysterious plans. " answers everything thank me God ? Does that make sense?
Me:
No, not at all.
God:
Are you serious? Next question?
Me:
I think I'm all set. Thanks for your time, God.
God:
You believe that? Do your friends call you set. My pleasure.
http://www.titane.ca/concordia/dfar251/igod/main.html <-- In case you want to have a chat with God...
Me:
Hello God
God:
Hello child. What is your name?
Me:
My name is Brent
God:
I am very pleased to meet you Brent.
Me:
Is it a sin to have sex with men if you're a man?
God:
Not unless a man is a sin to have sex with men if I am.
Me:
So should I repent?
God:
It's all good. Do you think you should?
Me:
I don't think I should
God:
Where do you get your ideas?
Me:
My ideas come from my morals and ethics, that I have been taught and have learned from the world around me.
God:
Where did you get your ideas come from your morals and ethics that you have been taught and have learned from the world around you?
Me:
from mom and dad
God:
Who or what is mom and dad?
Me:
Nevermind.
God:
OK Thanks for trying to explain that to me.
Me:
What is the difference between Heaven and hell?
Me:
God:
OK Thanks for trying to explain that to me.
Me:
I need help
God:
Tell me about your problems.
Me:
Why is it that when one does what is morally right, that bad things happen to them?
God:
Why do I exist?
Me:
Because we created you I suppose.
God:
Interesting explanation. By "we" do you mean you and me?
Me:
Yes
God:
I get it.
Me:
Oh good, I'm glad we cleared that up.
God:
Dude! Thanks for the compliment. Yes I am happy too, Brent.
Me:
What is the sound of one hand clapping?
God:
That is a very Zen-like question.
Me:
I know. Is there an answer for it?
God:
How do you know it? There might be.
Me:
If a tree falls int he woods, and there is no one there to hear it, does it make a sound?
God:
It depends on the kind of tree.
Me:
What kind of trees don't make noise when they fall?
God:
What kinds of trees do not make noise when they fall are there?
Me:
trees that grew sideways I suppose
God:
" What kinds of trees do not make noise when they fall are there?"? trees that grew sideways you suppose?
Me:
Indeed.
God:
Indeed it is so.
Me:
One more questions real quick before I leave. What is the meaning of life?
God:
One what? Actually, it's twenty-three, not forty-two.
Me:
Okay, but what is the meaning of life?
God:
Yeah okay, The meaning of life is part of God's mysterious plans.
Me:
What are god's mysterious plans?
God:
I haven't heard of god s mysterious plans.
Me:
That answers everything, thank you God.
God:
" I haven't heard of god s mysterious plans. " answers everything thank me God ? Does that make sense?
Me:
No, not at all.
God:
Are you serious? Next question?
Me:
I think I'm all set. Thanks for your time, God.
God:
You believe that? Do your friends call you set. My pleasure.
http://www.titane.ca/concordia/dfar251/igod/main.html <-- In case you want to have a chat with God...