(no subject)
Ok so this is a looooong dream but I'll try and not TLDR over it.
...or at least be amusing about it.
It all started when I went to the mall with my friends. I was over by the fountain when this kid fell in, for some reason, I lost my balance and fell in too. I did manage to save him though and the mom was basically told me she won't worry about telling him not to jump in public fountains because her son doesn't have much time to live.
...while clinging really tightly to me and sobbing. I was just like "I'm so sorry" and .... wasn't creeped out in the least by this? Anyways they ended up coming back to my house for dinner. Which was uneventful. They must have been staying the night too because at night is when things got really interesting. The dying kid was in the closet crying for his mom, and I was a little worried about that but didn't do anything since I thought she'll hear it by herself and come down. (I'm kind of an asshole in my dreams thanks to dream logic?)
That didn't work out so well as all of a sudden I went flying down to where the kid was who now looked like the most horrifying ghost type thing ever, who then promptly ate me.
So I was with them now. However Vampires work a little... differently in my dreams. Being eaten by one doesn't turn you into a vampire, but rather a ghost that is bound to their family. So I was just... sitting in the waaaay back of their car while they were just idly chatting to each other. By the way, the kid? Now a teenager and he has an older brother. It doesn't matter though since all the guys look kind of the same (including the dad, except he looks like an older version of the two boys)
They were just casually talking about this. the mom (who is kind of a bitch) decided that the whole thing never happened and to just ignore me and pretend I don't exist and I'll go away and everything will be back to normal. (I guess eating a person's soul is like.... vampire puberty or something) At that I screamed "EXCUSE ME?!" at the top of my lungs. That got their attention. Also at some point during the conversation the dad mentions that a janitor has been missing from their son's school for 60 days now.
And then I got home and was treated to the delightful sound of a man who was screaming bloody murder. I eventually traced the sound to a washing room area where a guy was rolling around with neither a torso nor arms. I then asked the incredibly stupid question "Are you okay?" (alright, that's one count for nice for saving the kid from drowning, one count for asshole for ignoring the kid when he was crying, and one count for mind blowingly stupid by asking this guy if he was alright) It was later in the day a priest of some sort came over and myself, no torso guy, and a couple other ghostly people came in a room. He explained that this would be no-torso-guy's final night before his soul went to heaven. It was explained that every night a part of your soul will be consumed, and when it's completely gone your soul will go to heaven.
I kind of thought that was creepy, but didn't think that much of it until night came. Then I suddenly felt very hot and tingly for a moment and then... that was it. I also lost something like 14 pounds. I thought that was pretty cool since I was trying to lose weight anyways. Only to look down with disdain and realize that it was uneven since they took more off of one side then the other. It was a little gross.
THEN it finally hit me that this would keep happening until I ended up like the no-torso guy. I calculated it to me losing 20% of my soul per night and thought 5 days of this wouldn't be so bad (that result was also BULLSHIT because I just now calculated it in my head and 14 pounds is roughly 11 to 12% of my body weight, but okay dream math we can round it way up) and then I realized I may have lost 20% of my weight last night, but tonight I'll lose 20% of my current weight, and that this would take longer then 5 days.
...and then I realized this had been happening to no-torso guy for 2 months before he could pass on. I came to the realization that this was going to be a horrifically slow and painful death. Alarmed I asked the vampire family (who by the way: besides the priest are the only ones who can hear me, but only the priest can both see and hear me) I asked them if there was a way to fix this, they said no. I asked if there was anything I could do to stop this from happening, again, no. They were also so casual about it. They genuinely could not care any less.
I can't remember what happens next, except I was at home (except I wasn't me, I was just in the POV of a completely different woman) and it involved this tv show. There was a huge, fancy looking iron gated fence (seriously that thing was as tall as the trees, and was actually very pretty) that inside had a beautiful garden. I always wanted to garden so I asked if I could help care for it. I was talking to an old man at the time, and he was just wistfully staring at it and talking about it.
When I noticed an own overhead, it was a great horned owl. I pointed it out and he said it was beautiful. It was then that the owl was hunting a creature that (I kid you not) looked like a tiny kangaroo. A tiny kangaroo that for some reason saw red when it saw me and then continually attacked when it wasn't running from the owl. IT BIT ME ON THE FACE REALLY HARD and it was a struggle to get the little feisty bastard off. So then me- this woman was in a car and driving away as fast as she could... only to get into a car accident. There was a commentary in the dream that yes: her luck actually was that shitty. She staggered her way to the hospital, tried to get some paper work to fill out when the nurse was like "Yeah, don't worry about it you're going to the OR" and after the surgery and stuff she was bummed that her face was going to be disfigured. Her boyfriend said it wasn't that bad and she was looking better already. aww happy ending.
BACK TO THE VAMPIRES.
So I guess there is this pill you can take to end the soul-consuming thing? Except I needed to win it in a beauty pageant. Cue montage of me getting ready, wearing this old dress that I really only own in my dreams, a headband, .... uh.... I can't remember anything else but I oddly enough held an uncanny resemblance to my 2nd grade school photo. I ate a gummy snack which I guess determines the song I dance to? (I don't know man, dream logic...) I started dancing and just like in real life I can't dance and yet everyone was enthralled like I was some kind of ballerina. For my final performance (of three) I picked up a raspberry one and hoped raspberry = a sad song. It did! And I did my ~dramatic and slow dance~ before being cut off and some people turned me into one of those generic hollywood blond chick and asked the audience if they liked this better.
...They didn't. And they were like "what is the admission? Free? Oh well that'd explain it" and turned me back to normal. I guess in my dreams people only want to see barbie doll people if they pay money for it. In anycase the boy who ate me (still a teen by the way, and actually kinda cute, now that I think about it. .... .... I AM NOT BELLA SWAN!) said I was free now, but gave me the pills anyways. I wondered if I still had to take one even though he just said I was free. I took one for good measure and gave the other 2 to the 2 remaining slaves so they could be freed as well. I think they just went straight to heaven, but I went straight home to watch TV with my brother.
...Yeah.
And then I was flipping out because TRIGUN WAS ACTUALLY ON ADULT SWIM AGAIN. Then when it was on the channel was mad because it wasn't on. Then my brother said he was looking at what'd be on in a few hours. It was apparently only 5pm even though it was pitch black outside (it's like this in the winter but it was clearly not winter in my dreams therefore this was strange, and I noted it down) and then in my second account of mid blowing stupidity I was like "Wait... this is a dream therefore I am sleeping at night and already missed it. NOOOOOOO" ...and then I woke myself up.
And the first thing I realized was that "YOU IDIOT IT WAS ONLY ON IN YOUR DREAMS WAKING UP SOLVES NOTHING" and the second thing I realized was that it was morning when I half expected it to still be night.
...the end.
And you know what? I'll watch that episode on youtube today. The TV Guide told me the exact episode it was anyways. Too bad it's subbed when I prefer dub Trigun. I guess beggars can't be choosers.