Cheating Challenge
Title: Hard Guy
Author: Luciferofthecircle
Rating: PG-13, for implied violence.
Word Count: 468
Notes: More introspection. This one’s a lot more depressing. Many thanks to Ultra_chrome for betaing this for me.
Disclaimer: I really wish I owned them, but I don’t.
Summary: Ray really doesn’t want to do this.
His name’s Luciano Dawson (His mother’s Italian but his father’s American, 5’8, blue eyes, 27, he likes classic cars, watches Friends, listens to Elvis, doesn’t have a girlfriend and wants to one day fly in a helicopter over the Grand Canyon.) and he’s fairly well known at ‘The Sunset Club.’ He’s a friendly guy, talks about himself a lot, which is how Ray knows all this stuff.
But right now Ray wishes that Luci (As he likes to be called,) wasn’t such a friendly guy, that Ray didn’t know so much about him or that what he did know wasn’t good. He wishes the guy were a wife-beater or a child molester or some two-bit hood that beats up on old ladies.
See Luci’s a nice guy but…
It’s just that…
He cheats at cards.
And when you’re playing against The Mob that’s not a smart thing to do. Because The Mob doesn’t like that kind of thing. The Mob have people to deal with that kind of thing. People who do more than give a sharp and pointed lecture on ethics. (Although sharp and pointed things are involved.) People like Armando Langoustini.
Ray really doesn’t want to do this. He hasn’t done much undercover before but he’s seen guys who have, long term; he’s seen their eyes, slightly empty, slightly disconnected. And he knows that’s because they have to keep a part of themselves separate to keep themselves sane. But Ray realises now that that part must be constantly watching, constantly forced to see what their hands are doing, constantly horrified by what they have become. Ray never wanted to split himself like that; naively, stupidly, thought he could get through this without having to do that to himself.
But he has no choice. If he doesn’t do this, if he shows the revulsion he feels, his cover will be blown. And then, if he’s lucky, he’ll be dead. If he’s unlucky he’ll be wishing he was in Luci’s shoes.
And just think of all the people he’ll help in the long run by getting rid of all these Mob guys. (Excuses, just excuses. What would his Ma say if she saw him now? What would Benny say? Don’t think about that.)
In fact he can’t think at all, can’t find any way to avoid this. And that’s the crux of the matter. Because if Benny were here he’d talk him out of it, he’d find someway for him not to do this. (Probably involving the Inuit and/or jumping off something, definitely destroying a suit in the process.) But Benny’s not here. Ray is. And his mind’s gone numbly blank.
It’s time. Time to see if he can do this, if he can hack it as a hard-guy in Vegas.
He reaches for Luciano’s fingers.
Something breaks.
***
So what do you think?
Author: Luciferofthecircle
Rating: PG-13, for implied violence.
Word Count: 468
Notes: More introspection. This one’s a lot more depressing. Many thanks to Ultra_chrome for betaing this for me.
Disclaimer: I really wish I owned them, but I don’t.
Summary: Ray really doesn’t want to do this.
His name’s Luciano Dawson (His mother’s Italian but his father’s American, 5’8, blue eyes, 27, he likes classic cars, watches Friends, listens to Elvis, doesn’t have a girlfriend and wants to one day fly in a helicopter over the Grand Canyon.) and he’s fairly well known at ‘The Sunset Club.’ He’s a friendly guy, talks about himself a lot, which is how Ray knows all this stuff.
But right now Ray wishes that Luci (As he likes to be called,) wasn’t such a friendly guy, that Ray didn’t know so much about him or that what he did know wasn’t good. He wishes the guy were a wife-beater or a child molester or some two-bit hood that beats up on old ladies.
See Luci’s a nice guy but…
It’s just that…
He cheats at cards.
And when you’re playing against The Mob that’s not a smart thing to do. Because The Mob doesn’t like that kind of thing. The Mob have people to deal with that kind of thing. People who do more than give a sharp and pointed lecture on ethics. (Although sharp and pointed things are involved.) People like Armando Langoustini.
Ray really doesn’t want to do this. He hasn’t done much undercover before but he’s seen guys who have, long term; he’s seen their eyes, slightly empty, slightly disconnected. And he knows that’s because they have to keep a part of themselves separate to keep themselves sane. But Ray realises now that that part must be constantly watching, constantly forced to see what their hands are doing, constantly horrified by what they have become. Ray never wanted to split himself like that; naively, stupidly, thought he could get through this without having to do that to himself.
But he has no choice. If he doesn’t do this, if he shows the revulsion he feels, his cover will be blown. And then, if he’s lucky, he’ll be dead. If he’s unlucky he’ll be wishing he was in Luci’s shoes.
And just think of all the people he’ll help in the long run by getting rid of all these Mob guys. (Excuses, just excuses. What would his Ma say if she saw him now? What would Benny say? Don’t think about that.)
In fact he can’t think at all, can’t find any way to avoid this. And that’s the crux of the matter. Because if Benny were here he’d talk him out of it, he’d find someway for him not to do this. (Probably involving the Inuit and/or jumping off something, definitely destroying a suit in the process.) But Benny’s not here. Ray is. And his mind’s gone numbly blank.
It’s time. Time to see if he can do this, if he can hack it as a hard-guy in Vegas.
He reaches for Luciano’s fingers.
Something breaks.
***
So what do you think?