Comments | lucilu: She never told a lie ... well might have told a lie, but never lived one.

lucilu

She never told a lie ... well might have told a lie, but never lived one.

Jul 12, 2006 09:14

I'm reminded of what I am loosing every morning as I look into the mirror. Although, everyday, it just seems to get harder and be worse. I thought it was meant to get easier as time goes by, and I begin to accept the fact that I am loosing my best friend. But, that is anything but the truth. It's harder as time goes by ( Read more... )

Comments 33

andrew_in_nz July 12 2006, 01:35:43 UTC

I wish I could say something to make this easier for you to bear... But I think you would reject what I would say.

In any case, I will be thinking of you... for what it's worth. *hug*

lucilu July 13 2006, 10:09:15 UTC

I'm feeling a bit better after a few days of writing this and letting it out. I don't try to reject words that come from anyone - more, take things onboard and learn from what people say.

Thank you, Andrew.

andrew_in_nz July 14 2006, 22:44:01 UTC

I'm glad you're feeling a bit better *hug* I have no idea what you're going through ( ... )

fireflypixi July 12 2006, 02:18:32 UTC

*big hugs that almost crush you*
loves u
xxx

lucilu July 13 2006, 10:09:53 UTC

I'm glad they didn't crush me. :)

Loves you too.

ruby_vibrations July 12 2006, 02:35:38 UTC

omg luci, i had no idea. jesus christ. like actually no idea. *hugs you very hard*

lucilu July 13 2006, 10:10:46 UTC

It's alright. Some people don't. I try and not hold that against people. :)

These times are hard, but support that comes from it makes it easier.

_honeyspider July 12 2006, 04:41:04 UTC

Oh, honey. Much love from me, sweetheart.

witchcrft July 12 2006, 05:25:52 UTC

Heya

My mum passed away in June 1999, and I can say it definatly doesn't get easier but you learn to live with the pain, I'm sorry if that makes no sense or comes across badly it's the best way I can put it into words, and I am not very good with words.
I bet she still knows whats going on even if it doesn't seem like it, I remember my Mum was delerious and she was confused about everything, but towards the end she waited for the family to all be there before she passed away, so I think even when it seems like they aren't there I sincerely believe they are deep down.
My mum started seeing floating orbs aswell, and I remember them feeding her the same thing in hospital, it was all she could have.
Try not to feel bad for loosing hope, it's part of the grief process, your grief process and you are dealing with alot at the moment..
Anyway, hopefully I havent accidently made things worse :( If you ever need to talk I am here.

lucilu July 13 2006, 10:17:17 UTC

My mum passed away in June 1999, and I can say it definatly doesn't get easier but you learn to live with the pain, I'm sorry if that makes no sense or comes across badly it's the best way I can put it into words, and I am not very good with words.

I suspect so. It's still very hard to cope with this since my Mum has declined in health so rapidly. She had hiccups along the way of loosing her sight or balancing when she was in the first few years of her Multiple Sclerosis and that was hard to even look at.

I think the more I do go and see her, the easier for me it will be to accept the position she is in, and hopefully it will make it easier when she does eventually pass.

I bet she still knows whats going on even if it doesn't seem like it, I remember my Mum was delerious and she was confused about everything, but towards the end she waited for the family to all be there before she passed away, so I think even when it seems like they aren't there I sincerely believe they are deep down.I'm not sure if she does, really. I know when ( ... )

andrew_in_nz July 14 2006, 22:55:44 UTC

I do vaguely know what you mean about sudden decline, and mental confusion: my Grandma, who I loved very much, had several strokes a few years ago, and has lost most of her movement and wit.

She is still in there, however. Deep down. Mostly obscured, but still there. It shows through occasionally - a free laugh, a witty commment.. But most of the time she is trapped in the useless mind and body she loathes, as it just wont do her bidding any more.

We don't love other people's bodies. We don't even love their minds. We love their hearts, their souls. Your Mum has lost her body, is losing her mind - but remember its her heart that you love. It is still there - and even once she is freed from her decaying body her heart will still go on. While you love her, she can never die.

Cry for yourself, Lucy, not her. Soon she will be freed of pain. She will be back in her eternal home. You will have to struggle on without her for a while. But she will always be there for you - always loving you. Just think of her, and she will be there :)