Someday I will do everything right

[luckytiger]

I sent myself a text message in the middle of the night last night, 4:01am, something illegible about grammar. I have grammar stuck in my head like a song. There is a thought bubble above my head parsing language, adding parenthetical commentary to everything I say. ANNOYING (adjective). It's annoying because I am not very good at grammar.

Comments

[maria_sputnik]

like the wedding! fuck all those tasks. seriously. do you want to go see my hypnotist? or maybe corey. or start practicing relaxation exercises? i can send you some relaxing mp3 files. if history is any indication you won't listen to them but every day is a new day, no?

you don't have any baby names at all?

i am going to come home for a couple of weeks, may 21-april 6 and then april 17-26, something like that. i am coming home partly with the intention to ogle your fetus. maybe you can actually call her yipiyuk. i mean, she's going to grow up in portland right?

i love you.

[luckytiger]

ugh, yes it is just like the wedding. if you send me some relaxing mp3 files i will listen to them but i think i need some call-to-action tunes most promptly.

i do have a few baby names. i have a short list in my email drafts folder that i made while i was at work.

yes, come see me. by then, according to plan, i should be perfect. by then i should have it all under control.

xoxo

OVERSHARE

[grumpalita]

i have 12 days left and here is my list:

wash floor, wash baseboards, cobweb elimination efforts, paint or clean bathroom ceiling, touch up paint in kitchen, sew and hang curtains, finish sewing blanket, put together crib, clean fridge, buy food to make food to freeze food, clean bathroom, wash kitchen floor, dust, wash blankets, cloth diapers?, eyebrows waxed, pack hospital bag, vacuum vents, clean basement bathroom, install car seat, oil change, clean car, take dog to vet, clean hall table, file everything.

i know there is more. i just want to share with you the crazy. also i have a patch of gums on the upper right side that is swollen and red and i cant go to the dentist b/c i cant lie back in the seat b/c my dorsal vein or whatever is compressed. also have revised the baby name list three times and last night i convinced myself that they all suck.
i doubt this will make you feel any better. i am probably just whining. basically i am a hormone salad.

Re: OVERSHARE

[luckytiger]

no, it makes me feel both better and worse at the same time, better because i laugh out loud, worse because i realize there are things on your list that i left off my list and now my list is longer.

a friend of mine is going in for a c-section tomorrow morning. she and i talk about fetus kicks and ultrasounds and breast pumps excitedly and at length but we diverge on the home front. she cut down trees and built her own crib back in the first trimester, grew cotton and made diapers, painted, cleaned, stocked and decorated in the second trimester and in the third trimester worked extra hours including today, the day before delivery to put aside an extra trillion bucks for her maternity leave.

eek. i am so inadequate. the crazy is bigger than me.