Comments | lumen_essence: No Subject, I'm not being clever right now

lumen_essence

No Subject, I'm not being clever right now

Jan 24, 2005 23:01

Fuck it, just kill me, I'm not even living anymore. Get me out of this rut I call my life. Fuck it ( Read more... )

Comments 8

gracycakes January 25 2005, 07:37:08 UTC

Have you ever though that maybe you can pick up your so called"shity ass life" and leave?Have you ever thought that maybe when something comes in you push it away?Have you ever thought that you could do anything you set for yourself?And that when this so called soul mate,job opportunity,or the music you so passionately want to make comes into your life,you could say "NO", because you havent had time to plan it out and you are pretty sure that it will turn into some really good form of crap.Have you actually pushed yourself to be the Justin you say you want to be?Dont want to change or do what you say you are,just go forth and do it ( ... )

gracycakes January 25 2005, 07:43:38 UTC

I just think that you are amazing and you dont have to wait for anything or anyone to tell you what you should do.

But hey,my opinion shouldnt make any impact unless you actually value it.

I love you.and im serious.

lumen_essence January 25 2005, 08:13:39 UTC

You missed it completely

I am leaving

gracycakes January 25 2005, 08:42:53 UTC

Well then,i guess i missed it but atleast you are doing what you have wanted to do for like ever.

sorryforcrying January 25 2005, 18:49:27 UTC

i'm glad you finally get it, because believe it or not, you HAVE hurt alot of people getting there. (yes, that means me, too.) You have more potential, more friends, more opportunities than alot of people. I've caught myself saying things like "i wish i could take care of myself as well as Justin does". That turned out to be a ridiculous presumption. I honestly hope you find what you're looking for, because life without happiness is crappy, no matter who your friends are.

lumen_essence January 25 2005, 23:24:51 UTC

You know, for a while I did have everything together, for a brief moment I did. Everything looked like it was going to turn out for the best. Then it came apart, it was probably my fault, but whatever the past is in the past. And I did hurt a lot of people, some voluntary, some completely unintentional. But then again practically everyone has hurt a lot of people that I've seen, so I'm not about to single myself out for target like that. You guys keep saying opportunites. Where? Point it out because I really don't see it. That's why I'm making plans to leave, because I'm not seeing these opportunities. Potential I'll reluctantly agree with, and friends I have, but I see nothing opportune here for me right now. Feel free to prove me wrong.