Regrets
Title: Regrets
Rating: Not much to be worried about. Not a lot of swearing or inappropriate content. (K+/PG)
Type/Genre: I guess you could call it a short story, a little over 1,000 words. I wrote it for the Kangin's return project. Since this is also a theme for the 100 Super Junior Fanfic Challenge, I will consider number 100 to be my first finished story for the challenge! I have almost all required 6 finished, and they are pretty short. They can all fit together in succession, but can also be read by themselves. I've been putting more energy into my long running fics. ^^; Sorry!
Pairing: Kangin and Leeteuk
Summary: Kangin's returned! What kind of sentiments await him?
After his celebration party the previous evening, all of the Super Junior members lounged and gathered in the 11th floor dorm living room, catching up, relaxing, and talking. One by one, each of the members dispersed, leaving because of various schedules. After a morning of loud catching up, Kangin was left alone with Leeteuk.
“Bye, Heechul. Don't work yourself too hard!” Kangin's face scrunched in dismay at the look the two shared. They'd gotten closer over time, alright. Too close for Kangin's liking. The wide smile on Leeteuk's face made him wary and upset, but he tried not to show it, stuffing his feelings deep inside his core. His tough appearance was deceiving- although he was strong and very masculine, he could also be somewhat sensitive. Time in the army brought him closer to his emotions, and he felt more comfortable with expressing what he felt openly. Now, those feelings rose to the surface, threatening to swallow him whole if he didn't face them.
He was jealous.
He was always the closest to Leeteuk.
Now Heechul had taken his place.
“So Youngwoon, anything you want to do? I'll be here for half the day- I requested to have it off to welcome you home.”
Youngwoon felt a little less uneasy at another one of Leeteuk's thoughtful suggestions.
“How about we just go to out to eat? I'll treat you.” His smile was happy and pure, just the smile Kangin had been waiting to see.
“Sure. I would love that.”
Walking downstairs and hopping into Kangin's car, he drove them to the fanciest restaurant he could think of. When they drove up to the beautiful exterior, Leeteuk's eyes glimmered with excitement.
“You don't have to do this.... pay, I mean. After all, this is your first full day back, I should be treating you and-”
“You've already done enough for a lifetime, Jungsu. Let me celebrate by taking care of and spending time with you.” The two stared happily at each other before they entered the building, enjoying not just filling their stomachs, but enjoying catching up. Kangin was trying his best to make up for lost time.
“So, things have been pretty busy lately... and even more hectic. Honestly though, I don't think I could have done it without Heechul with me. He's sorta my rock- just really supportive, and he always says that I shouldn't feel like I have to do everything on my own.” Leeteuk's cheeks began to redden, and his expression became bashful. Kangin didn't think he could handle much more of the conversation that his friend had begun, but he kept a tamper on his anger.
“Heechul, huh? You guys have gotten closer?” As much as he tried, he couldn't hide his biting tone. He knew Leeteuk was reading him like a book, because his friend's lips tightened into a hesitant line.
“Uh, yeah. He's been really helpful.” Kangin felt like fireworks were rumbling in his chest, counting down to a horrid explosion in three, two, one...
His fist met with the table in a loud bang, as Leeteuk jumped back. He glared at Leeteuk with a dark malevolence in his eyes, pulling him sharply, obviously scaring Leeteuk with his hard grip. He was expecting Kangin to yell at him, to go berserk- but he didn't expect the evil that glazed over Kangin's pupils to fade, and he definitely did not expect his friend to pull him close, into a deep and protective hug.
“I'm sorry.” Kangin's tears rolled down his cheeks, with a mixture of shock and happiness ingrained on Leeteuk's face, he let Kangin slump into his arms. “I'm sorry that I haven't been around the past two years. I'm sorry that I haven't been keeping the best contact with you! I'm sorry I got in a bar fight, and I'm sorry I got into a drunk driving accident. I'm sorry that I-”
“Youngwoon-”
“No! Listen! I'm sorry, and I'm sorry that I haven't been here for you. I'm sorry that I'm not good at apologies, and I'm sorry for not saying or showing you how sorry I am. Most of all, I'm sorry that I haven't given you better apologies before, and that I made you so disappointed in me. I wanted to leave my regrets behind, I wanted to be a new person.... but being back here shows me just how much left I have to do.”
Kangin's sobs grew louder, and Leeteuk comfortingly ran fingers through his short hair.
“Hey, it's okay. You've apologized before. You've told me before. I know. I know, Youngwoon, it's okay. You're gonna be just fine. You are fine. Everything's okay again, Youngwoon, there's no need to worry.”
”Poor Youngwoon, he must be really stressed from this new transition.” Leeteuk thought sadly to himself. He helped tuck his friend in, and gave him a chaste kiss on the forehead. Kangin smiled, closing his eyes, his breaths echoing through the room.
Leeteuk walked out and brushed his hair back, face now layered with distress. Heechul walked into the dorm, loudly talking on his cell-phone.
“Ah- Hannie! You can't leave so soon! You have to stay for just a while longer-” Leeteuk cut him off with a shush, bringing his finger to his mouth. Heechul saw the anxiety on his friend's face.
“Sorry Hannie, gotta go! I'll talk to you later!”
“Wait, Heechul-” Hankyung protested from the other line, but Heechul hung up hastily.
“Jungsu, what's wrong? Is something going on?” He tried to fake a smile, but Heechul saw right through him.
“Nothing,” Leeteuk tried to lie, unskillfully making Heechul even more suspicious of his masked feelings. “I'm perfectly fine, just a little uneasy.” Heechul slid his hand from Leeteuk's upper back, to rest on his shoulder, carefully massaging his friend.
“Am I going to have to tell you again? You can always lean on me for support.”
“I know Heechul. Thanks.”
“No problem. Take a shower now, then go to bed.”
“Alright.” Heechul embraced Leeteuk. The two parted ways, Heechul walking past the room Kangin lay in. He saw his eyes slightly open.
“Making Jungsu stressed again, just like always.” Even though Kangin was half asleep, Heechul's words stung, and guilt rocked through him, tears clouding his vision.
Rating: Not much to be worried about. Not a lot of swearing or inappropriate content. (K+/PG)
Type/Genre: I guess you could call it a short story, a little over 1,000 words. I wrote it for the Kangin's return project. Since this is also a theme for the 100 Super Junior Fanfic Challenge, I will consider number 100 to be my first finished story for the challenge! I have almost all required 6 finished, and they are pretty short. They can all fit together in succession, but can also be read by themselves. I've been putting more energy into my long running fics. ^^; Sorry!
Pairing: Kangin and Leeteuk
Summary: Kangin's returned! What kind of sentiments await him?
After his celebration party the previous evening, all of the Super Junior members lounged and gathered in the 11th floor dorm living room, catching up, relaxing, and talking. One by one, each of the members dispersed, leaving because of various schedules. After a morning of loud catching up, Kangin was left alone with Leeteuk.
“Bye, Heechul. Don't work yourself too hard!” Kangin's face scrunched in dismay at the look the two shared. They'd gotten closer over time, alright. Too close for Kangin's liking. The wide smile on Leeteuk's face made him wary and upset, but he tried not to show it, stuffing his feelings deep inside his core. His tough appearance was deceiving- although he was strong and very masculine, he could also be somewhat sensitive. Time in the army brought him closer to his emotions, and he felt more comfortable with expressing what he felt openly. Now, those feelings rose to the surface, threatening to swallow him whole if he didn't face them.
He was jealous.
He was always the closest to Leeteuk.
Now Heechul had taken his place.
“So Youngwoon, anything you want to do? I'll be here for half the day- I requested to have it off to welcome you home.”
Youngwoon felt a little less uneasy at another one of Leeteuk's thoughtful suggestions.
“How about we just go to out to eat? I'll treat you.” His smile was happy and pure, just the smile Kangin had been waiting to see.
“Sure. I would love that.”
Walking downstairs and hopping into Kangin's car, he drove them to the fanciest restaurant he could think of. When they drove up to the beautiful exterior, Leeteuk's eyes glimmered with excitement.
“You don't have to do this.... pay, I mean. After all, this is your first full day back, I should be treating you and-”
“You've already done enough for a lifetime, Jungsu. Let me celebrate by taking care of and spending time with you.” The two stared happily at each other before they entered the building, enjoying not just filling their stomachs, but enjoying catching up. Kangin was trying his best to make up for lost time.
“So, things have been pretty busy lately... and even more hectic. Honestly though, I don't think I could have done it without Heechul with me. He's sorta my rock- just really supportive, and he always says that I shouldn't feel like I have to do everything on my own.” Leeteuk's cheeks began to redden, and his expression became bashful. Kangin didn't think he could handle much more of the conversation that his friend had begun, but he kept a tamper on his anger.
“Heechul, huh? You guys have gotten closer?” As much as he tried, he couldn't hide his biting tone. He knew Leeteuk was reading him like a book, because his friend's lips tightened into a hesitant line.
“Uh, yeah. He's been really helpful.” Kangin felt like fireworks were rumbling in his chest, counting down to a horrid explosion in three, two, one...
His fist met with the table in a loud bang, as Leeteuk jumped back. He glared at Leeteuk with a dark malevolence in his eyes, pulling him sharply, obviously scaring Leeteuk with his hard grip. He was expecting Kangin to yell at him, to go berserk- but he didn't expect the evil that glazed over Kangin's pupils to fade, and he definitely did not expect his friend to pull him close, into a deep and protective hug.
“I'm sorry.” Kangin's tears rolled down his cheeks, with a mixture of shock and happiness ingrained on Leeteuk's face, he let Kangin slump into his arms. “I'm sorry that I haven't been around the past two years. I'm sorry that I haven't been keeping the best contact with you! I'm sorry I got in a bar fight, and I'm sorry I got into a drunk driving accident. I'm sorry that I-”
“Youngwoon-”
“No! Listen! I'm sorry, and I'm sorry that I haven't been here for you. I'm sorry that I'm not good at apologies, and I'm sorry for not saying or showing you how sorry I am. Most of all, I'm sorry that I haven't given you better apologies before, and that I made you so disappointed in me. I wanted to leave my regrets behind, I wanted to be a new person.... but being back here shows me just how much left I have to do.”
Kangin's sobs grew louder, and Leeteuk comfortingly ran fingers through his short hair.
“Hey, it's okay. You've apologized before. You've told me before. I know. I know, Youngwoon, it's okay. You're gonna be just fine. You are fine. Everything's okay again, Youngwoon, there's no need to worry.”
”Poor Youngwoon, he must be really stressed from this new transition.” Leeteuk thought sadly to himself. He helped tuck his friend in, and gave him a chaste kiss on the forehead. Kangin smiled, closing his eyes, his breaths echoing through the room.
Leeteuk walked out and brushed his hair back, face now layered with distress. Heechul walked into the dorm, loudly talking on his cell-phone.
“Ah- Hannie! You can't leave so soon! You have to stay for just a while longer-” Leeteuk cut him off with a shush, bringing his finger to his mouth. Heechul saw the anxiety on his friend's face.
“Sorry Hannie, gotta go! I'll talk to you later!”
“Wait, Heechul-” Hankyung protested from the other line, but Heechul hung up hastily.
“Jungsu, what's wrong? Is something going on?” He tried to fake a smile, but Heechul saw right through him.
“Nothing,” Leeteuk tried to lie, unskillfully making Heechul even more suspicious of his masked feelings. “I'm perfectly fine, just a little uneasy.” Heechul slid his hand from Leeteuk's upper back, to rest on his shoulder, carefully massaging his friend.
“Am I going to have to tell you again? You can always lean on me for support.”
“I know Heechul. Thanks.”
“No problem. Take a shower now, then go to bed.”
“Alright.” Heechul embraced Leeteuk. The two parted ways, Heechul walking past the room Kangin lay in. He saw his eyes slightly open.
“Making Jungsu stressed again, just like always.” Even though Kangin was half asleep, Heechul's words stung, and guilt rocked through him, tears clouding his vision.