The old familiar sting
He's moving in a trance.
Three years ago if he had been in this position he wouldn't have given a shit, and anyway, he wouldn't even be in this position to begin with. Children, a woman he loves, Hobbes. Friends. A life. A family. He wouldn't have any of it. And the sick thing is that part of him wishes he didn't, because it wouldn't hurt like this when this shit happens.
He's left the girls with Eostre, managed to make up some kind of lame excuse about things to do or needing to find Hobbes or something, and now he's just walking, head down, trying to make his heartrate return to normal. It's not fast. It's slow. It feels like it's beating a few times a minute. He feels vaguely lightheaded.
Somewhere he appreciates the irony of this. Hobbes shows up and suddenly people are feeling replaced. But that had been...
He doesn't even know.
It's probably force of habit that brings him to the playground. It's been a while since he's been there and he never did much work on it because of his leg, but he's there now, and he stops, gritting his teeth at the ache in his leg and the ache in his head and the ache fucking everywhere.
If he didn't fucking care this wouldn't hurt. He doesn't have that luxury.
Three years ago if he had been in this position he wouldn't have given a shit, and anyway, he wouldn't even be in this position to begin with. Children, a woman he loves, Hobbes. Friends. A life. A family. He wouldn't have any of it. And the sick thing is that part of him wishes he didn't, because it wouldn't hurt like this when this shit happens.
He's left the girls with Eostre, managed to make up some kind of lame excuse about things to do or needing to find Hobbes or something, and now he's just walking, head down, trying to make his heartrate return to normal. It's not fast. It's slow. It feels like it's beating a few times a minute. He feels vaguely lightheaded.
Somewhere he appreciates the irony of this. Hobbes shows up and suddenly people are feeling replaced. But that had been...
He doesn't even know.
It's probably force of habit that brings him to the playground. It's been a while since he's been there and he never did much work on it because of his leg, but he's there now, and he stops, gritting his teeth at the ache in his leg and the ache in his head and the ache fucking everywhere.
If he didn't fucking care this wouldn't hurt. He doesn't have that luxury.