Jumpin' on this here bandwagon
1- Always release a troll in the dungeon- it’s where they least suspect it to appear.
2- It is always acceptable to punch Denmark.
3- It is also always acceptable to cuddle Iceland and demand he calls me brother.
4- It is never acceptable to not be fabulous.
5- Requesting Ice Ice Baby at the restaurant on Iceland’s birthday will never get old.
6- Trolls are not good lovers.
7- That is what the kraken is for instead.
8- Denmark talks like he has a potato in his throat. No argument.
9- Wear your teeny weeny with pride.
10- Take pride in the fact that at least you’re not as gay as Sweden.
11- Hairpins are what make a man.
12- My hat is cool. No matter what other people say.
13- It is always acceptable to push Denmark out of a boat if he gets to close when fishing.
14- It is always funny to glare at England and watch him squirm.
15- Iceland must be protected at all costs.
16- Especially from Denmark.
17- Upon knowledge of a new bar opening in either of our countries it is absolutely of paramount importance that they get a poster with Iceland’s photo on saying, “DO NOT SERVE THIS BOY WITH ALCOHOL”
18- Masturbation is for sinners.
19- Which is why you get someone else to do it for you.
20- When one has an idiot like Denmark to drive you everywhere obtaining a driving license is not important.
21- Even from the bottom, one must top.
22- Faking an orgasm is the key to success.
23- Puppy eyes are only to be used in extreme cases of urgency.
24- If puppy eyes fail- send in the trolls.
25- Trolling livejournal and then blaming it on an ACTUAL is always the best option.
26- Even if everyone doesn’t believe he exists.
27- Start dieting tomorrow.
28- Even though I’m not fat.
29- Also stop hunting/eating whale tomorrow.
30- Stick to these “tomorrow I will…”s for once.
31- It is always perfectly acceptable to punch Denmark in the cock in public.
32- As is it equally acceptable to feel him up in order to get what I want.
33- Cockteasing is also a key to success.
34- Love thine self. Which I do.
35- Be more fabulous than Poland without him realising it.
36- A witty name is the key to a good female alter ego.
37- Norgina is a beautiful name.
38- Unlike Denine.
39- Fairies are manly.
40- They just don’t understand.
41- Never attempt to teach someone magic again.
42- Look what happened with England…
43- It is not acceptable to get drunk with Denmark, sail to England and pretend you’re having a raid.
44- Nor is it acceptable to forget what you’re doing there in the first place and have sex on his front lawn.
45- It is never acceptable to have sex with Denmark. Ever.
46- Ever.
47- I don’t need the EU. Nor does Iceland.
48- My butt NEVER looks big in jeans. It just looks bootylicious.
49- It is always, always acceptable to stand outside of Denmark’s window at 3AM and play Fairytale loudly on the violin to rub salt into his fresh Eurovision wounds.
50- I won’t say I’m in love. It’s fun to wear dresses and watch men fall at my feet at bars.
51- Even if one of those said men is always Denmark.