(Untitled)

[madela]

Do you know what's amazing? The human heart. Not the actual heart, but whatever part of us actually controls emotion- so some part of the brain I suppose. You can be so jaded; so hurt and cynical; so afraid to care about someone, but somehow you still do. You do it so easily too. It's astounding. And of course, things would be a lot easier if you

Comments

[madela]

I read Sisyphus in the 10th grade. Say what you want about Villa, but if you take it seriously you'll come out of that place an educated individual. And severely warped. But educated.
Syphilis works just as well, if not better. It's inescapable, except for pennecilian.

so wrong?

[adelinejak]

"Maybe I imagine relationships being more than what they are...and experiences being more meaningful. I just remember us being in England..."

So you care a lot about this boy, and when he can write something like that, it's easy to understand why you are drawn to him. But it seems like every time you communicate with Karl, it unnerves you quite a bit. He's a challenge, but isn't that what you want? He's moving to Oberlin, which is shitty. Was last night the first time he mentioned it? I thought he was returning to NYU for sure. Maddie, this boy is full of adventures and excitement, but you have a lot to be proud of in your life. Your world is filled with its own unique characters and settings, too. Karl's different, but not better. If I had a chance to snort coke with Conor, I really don't think I would. I can't say I envy him. I can't say I want that "life experience." But it is great that you care about this boy. He must really need you.

Re: so wrong?

[madela]

but there's the part where he slept with his ex-girlfriend. there's the fact that last night was in fact the first I'd ever heard about Oberlin. there's the part where I didn't sleep at all until 7:30 this morning and then got up at 9, and cried. I'm so confused and I am really questioning going on New Year's at all. I really don't know what to do. I feel so stupid.