Filk: The Tourists Who Don't Know Anything
This is based on a post by realfranklin. I'm sure the tourists he was talking with were pulling his leg; if nothing else, people who were abysmally ignorant of Europe wouldn't know that Waterloo is supposed to be in Belgium. But it's a great excuse for a song.
The Tourists Who Don't Know Anything
Words: Gary McGath, Copyright 2008
Music: "The Pirates Who Don't Do Anything"
Chorus:
We are the tourists who don't know anything.
We just leave home and fly around.
And if you ask us about anything,
We'll just tell you we don't know anything.
Oh, we used to think that Paris was the capital of Europe
And we didn't know Oktoberfest is only in the fall,
And we've learned the station Waterloo is nowhere close to Belgium,
And we've never seen Berlin with its Great Wall.
(Chorus)
No one ever let us know that Italy's where pizza came from,
And we've found the Tow'r of London isn't leaning, not at all.
We cannot find any Germans who'll go out in Lederhosen,
And we've never seen Berlin with its Great Wall.
(Chorus)
We are sad to learn that kangaroos don't hop around in Austria,
Which isn't next to Munich -- it's a big world, after all.
Which isn't in Bavaria or in Neander Tal,
And we couldn't find the Vatican by climbing ev'ry mountain,
And we've never seen Berlin with its Great Wall.
[Actually, Austria is pretty close to Munich. I'll need to work on that line. Update: See changed line above.]
(Chorus)
The Tourists Who Don't Know Anything
Words: Gary McGath, Copyright 2008
Music: "The Pirates Who Don't Do Anything"
Chorus:
We are the tourists who don't know anything.
We just leave home and fly around.
And if you ask us about anything,
We'll just tell you we don't know anything.
Oh, we used to think that Paris was the capital of Europe
And we didn't know Oktoberfest is only in the fall,
And we've learned the station Waterloo is nowhere close to Belgium,
And we've never seen Berlin with its Great Wall.
(Chorus)
No one ever let us know that Italy's where pizza came from,
And we've found the Tow'r of London isn't leaning, not at all.
We cannot find any Germans who'll go out in Lederhosen,
And we've never seen Berlin with its Great Wall.
(Chorus)
We are sad to learn that kangaroos don't hop around in Austria,
Which isn't next to Munich -- it's a big world, after all.
Which isn't in Bavaria or in Neander Tal,
And we couldn't find the Vatican by climbing ev'ry mountain,
And we've never seen Berlin with its Great Wall.
[Actually, Austria is pretty close to Munich. I'll need to work on that line. Update: See changed line above.]
(Chorus)