I am getting ready to end the first, full week that I have smiled everyday, all day. It feels good to really be happy. I am still morning, but in another way. Mrs. Stanley would have wanted me to work hard & help my kids to the best of my ability. I am doing much better ( Read more... )

I didn't realized that I have been so well trained at covering up my feelings for the sake of others. I have been just covering & covering up how I really feel for so long that is comes as second nature to me know. Ever since I was in high school in various leadership rolls I have learned to show only happiness to the crowd and forget about ( Read more... )

I complain about my job a lot. So what, if you don't want to read about it thanks for the support anyway and skip this post. That being said ( Read more... )

I had two nightmares last night. I think my since of security is being tested & I really don't feel secure in my surrounds and what not. Other than that I am just trying to get the ball rolling on this Japan thing. I am definitely going to Japan in 3 months. Wow, when I think of how I will be leaving this country in such a short time, I get ( Read more... )

I don't think I could have envisioned a more horrible vacation than the one I am on right now. Not only did I have the "pleasure" of attending my grandfather's funeral, but my mentor & friend past away on the same day we buried big daddy. I haven't wanted to do anything but sleep and cry. I am blessed that I have some really great friends that ( Read more... )

Life, it's the only thing that you get for free. Life has really been happening to me for the past month. My job, my "friends", my family, etc.... It's been hard, but I am slowly pulling through. I am not rushing to be happy for the comfort of others. I am just dealing with being strong for my mom & working through how I feel about losing the ( Read more... )

In 3 months I will be leaving for Japan (working for possibly a bad company, oh well) and I am pretty excited. I have to keep reminding myself that I will only be in hell for another couple of months. By hell, I mean this horrible job that I have. It makes me feel like such a bitch & a horrible person. I guess I need to stop surrounding myself ( Read more... )

Its Friday afternoon. I should be excited about the approaching weekend. I should be really happy right now. Well shoulda, coulda, woulda I am stewing so hard right now that I will probably boil the fuck over. Why am I still upset about this bullshit? Why can't I just let it go ( Read more... )

Oh not only am I pissed at my friend I am a little unsure for my safety at my place of employment ( Read more... )

I don't think I have enough words to describe what went down last night. Before I start this rant, I am going to say that after this is over, I will forgive and will not think about it anymore. I have to forgive because I don't want this anger to have anymore power over my life than I have given it right now. So here we go ( Read more... )