Fic -- Don't You Dare Look Back

[madwomanpoems]

Title: Don’t You Dare Look Back
Author: madwomanpoems
Pairings: Jo/Camille, Camille/Lucy
Rating: PG probably
Warnings: ANGST, some non-descript sexual activity
Disclaimer: This isn’t mine guys. I actually don’t own anything and I haven’t acquired anything and I’m just a big vat of nothing without even owning the vat.
Word count: ~5,500
Summary: Camille’s phone bings

Comments

[shisou_eimin]

oh god, i thought i'd be okay. but then this line:

But mostly, she smiles because sometimes feelings don’t have to hurt, don’t have to cut you up inside to be real.

was like a fucking knife to the heart. jesus, woman, why do you always have to break my heart like this?

this was so...bittersweet, i guess, is the right word. it hurts but it's good at the same time. i love that lucy calls camille 'kid'. and jo, fuck. jo just breaks my heart so much. especially the way you write her. i really just can't sometimes with you. :|

ah, but one little thing:

“I would love to have chocolate and sugar and caffeine for breakfast with you,” she says, a grin breaks over Jo’s face, and her hands are on Lucy, pulling her close for a kiss. “Mmm,” she mumbles, “minty.”

"Jo" should be "Camille" :) if you ever need a quick beta on something, i'm always free for you <3

[madwomanpoems]

Aw fuck. I thought I caught them all. It's all fixed now. thank you so much. For reading and catching my stupid mistake. And for your offer and I AM SORRY THAT I AM SO MEAN AND HEARTBREAKING BUT I JUST CANNOT HELP IT. Jo is the most heartbreaking character ever because, you know, Camille is pretty okay after this and she is actually in a better place than she has been in a long time. But Jo isn't. Jo is pretty damn messy after the whole thing. IT really doesn't go so well for her for awhile after. Things are just so hard for Jo and that breaks my heart and it would have been such a different fic from Jo's perspective. like, in every possible way. but Camille's felt safer. like there was a clear jumping and landing point. because Jo pretty much goes out of the frying pan and into the fryer of denial and angst and confusion and pain. like, she starts off pretty numb, imo, and ends up just like, laying on her couch and not washing her hair for four days and wishing she was at the palmwoods where Kendall would check up on her and James

[shisou_eimin]

MY GOD WOMAN WHY WOULD YOU TELL ME THIS :| :| alkfjdalkjd now i'm thinking about this from Jo' POV and just aakfdja my heart. i hate you :|

but that's kind of how it is in my btr/spn fic that i'm going to be writing for the recast big bang. they both feel for each other, they just never acted on it, mostly because Jo held back and just. it's really heartbreaking when i think about it and i hate myself for even putting them through that but afjd it's SPN and everything needs to be tragic.

and now we're even on the random tangent lol

[naruke_chan]

You had me at Vienna Teng, omg. That song is one of my ABSOLUTE FAVORITES.

And then...the fic. Lord, the imagery is so beautiful and cutting, brutally honest. I loved it.

Jo calls her name, and it mixes with the accents around her. Jo sounds exactly like she looks, exactly like she is: a girl uprooted. is one of my favorite lines. It speaks volumes without trying.

And the OT4 fjdiaorjdiaklfda of all the pairings, OT4 is probably my favorite. ;__;

You never get over them. You get beyond them." Ah. :')

This was really wonderful.

[madwomanpoems]

I just... to be fair, I totally saw the song paired with a graphic on tumblr. I had never heard it befor, but I listened to it and it's perhaps the most perfect Jo/Camille song ever. and just. I couldn't not write to it.

Oh my goodness, that is-- I am beyond flattered. And I'm glad you liked the OT4 comment because in Camille's mind, the boys are just OT4 and she doesn't worry too much about how exactly the formation works therein.

Again, thank you. Thank you for taking the time to read and comment and for all the positive words. ♥

[naruke_chan]

First, omg your icon fujdioardjola

Second, you should definitely give Vienna Teng's discography a listen; she's terrific. Her lyrics are just stunning and she's one of those songwriters who, if you took away the music, you'd be left with some great poetry. I've been in love with her music since I discovered her like four or five years ago.

And also, what's your handle on Tumblr? I'd like to follow you. :) I'm faberino!

[madwomanpoems]

I love that icon. I can't remember who made it... (though I know it says in my icon space) but I certainly didn't. Whoever is 80000 kinds of talented.

I'll do that! I've actually been listening to a lot more of it and I really enjoy it.

I'm letthoseapplesfall, but I am posting less and less because tumblr makes me very anxious and paranoid due to privacy things and my general neuroses.

[breila_rose]

I loved this. It was heartbreaking and perfect and wonderful and perfect.

I love these girls and their emotions and their heartache and happiness.

♥♥

[madwomanpoems]

Thank you so much for reading and commenting. I am so glad that you liked this. I especially love hearing that I did them justice from someone who writes them so well. And I am just so flattered. So thank you.

Also, yeah, that is. That is everything about them. It just hurts so good sometimes.

[lyricsandhearts]

Oh, Kait. Kait. There are tears in my eyes and this is beautiful, so beautiful. Your Lucy voice. Is so, so flawless. So Lucy that I can hardly deal. And Jo and her hair and her feelings and Camille and the way she starts calling Jo by her full name when she gets uncomfortable and Kendall is married to the band and the repetition and oh. I can't, I just. I am so in love with this. ♥

[madwomanpoems]

Oh Ellie. <3 Thank you so much for reading, you beautiful little lady. You are such a little sweetheart that I cannot handle it sometimes. I am so glad you liked this and so glad you liked Lucy's voice. I was actually deeply self conscious about it, having never done it before. Ah. Anyway. Thank you so much for reading and commenting and for all of your sweet words. Also, yes, I'm pretty sure that despite his sexuality issues, Kendall Knight would legally marry Big Time Rush if he could.