Hey there, I got married on my birthday yesterday.
I spent several hours in tears, not good tears, self hate tears. I wouldn't answer the door when USPS came to it, because when I looked through the peep hole there was a woman standing there who's hair looks like my grandmother's, who I have no desire to see, and so I panicked. I wouldn't open the door, but in doing so it made it that I couldn't get the package until today. I'm currently waiting on the redelivery. But it upset me because the gift is from my mother, and its a brooch and I really would have liked to wear it yesterday at the wedding, I was planning on it. And in the past when they haven't dropped stuff off with us they drop it off with the office.
They didn't do that, we even tried going to the Post Office because I was so desperate. I can now say I've openly cried in a USPS that looked like it closed 5 years ago. So yeah, early part of birthday was not good. We kept arguing because I wouldn't stop crying, and we kept getting more and more delayed because of that. I'm a little regretful of how much time I wasted being upset at myself, but we got the day underway after a tense trip to work for booze and cake and flowers, another spat because we weren't even arguing it was just us yelling back and forth to be positive while I sobbed, really makes no sense but that's always how those moments are in retrospect, and then finally me getting out of the car and going to five guys to order us some food. Because I'd been up since 10 and he'd been up since like 11-1130 and we had neither eaten and it was 1 oclock. Made up over hot dogs and burgers, and then hurried home because we'd already pushed back the wedding 30 minutes and then it got shoved back an hour.
I started up skype with my parents and talked with them while I made my bouquet. I had cream statice, red gerbera daisies, and yellow tulips. I tied them off with a yellow ribbon. I also put the statice in my hair. I talked to my parents for a bit, told mom about what happened with USPS, and she was really sweet about it. I knew she really wanted to get it to me by my birthday and I fucked it up just for panicking, but she just told me she didn't think it would get there on time anyway and not to worry. After a bit Mitchell started talking with them instead so I could go get dressed. My dad helped Mitchell with his tie via webcam, which is kind of hilarious but also adorable. Mitchell wore his dark gray suit, dark red shirt, and red and black striped tie. I wore my ChiChi party dress that I got for this and the reception, blue jessica simpson heels, and a banana republic cardigan.
Fun thing then, my grandparents call. Mitchell picked up the phone, but then had to take a call from Courtney who was one of our witnesses, hung up on them, and they still called back. Eventually I took the phone. I haven't spoken with my grandparents since just before christmas. I intend to keep it that way, they are not nice people. But I spoke with my uncle the other day, who bet me they'd call me and that was part of why I panicked so badly even though she doesn't know where we live now, and he said her mental state is starting to really go. And it was. Past two in the after noon and Hitler apologizes for waking Mitchell up. She asked me if I was 24, which she used to do jokingly and now I can tell theres a bit of hesitance there. But they won't see a doctor. My grandfather has the 'shakes' as he puts them, but its really parkinsons, you watch him try to eat and you can tell, he can barely keep food on a fork. My grandmother hasn't been to a doctor really for years. My aunt works in care for elderly patients with dementia and alzhemiers, and my uncle has tried to get them to see a doctor and they refuse. Another reason I won't see them because they will not take care of themselves. For YEARS, the whole family at one time or another has gone to my grandfather and told him he needs to see about Hitler, because for years she's been on a downhill slope and won't admit it. But on the phone she wished me happy birthday, I said I loved them and I'd talk to them later and that was it. It was weird and I was so wrapped up in getting ready that I barely processed it, but it was peaceable and hopefully they dont take it as a sign to come talk with me, because I don't want to see them.
ANYWAY, we spent an inordinate amount of time trying to get mitchell's tie situated, we neither tie ties much and are neither good at it. Courtney arrived with Lola, her daughter, and eventually we set out. Met Amanda at the clerk of courts down on Atlantic near the beach. $30 something and heres our rings and oh man this is happening. Amanda had my phone to tape it, Courtney strapped Lola to her, which never have I seen a baby that is happy ALL the time, even when she's fussy it doesn't last long, and she's always so excited by new stuff, its adorable, but anyway Courtney took photos for us. Which there's a basically all photo post to tumblr.
The people in the clerk of courts clearly don't get a lot of people all dressed up for these sorts of ceremonies, but it was all I really wanted, not the big one still to come, just this incredibly weird and quick go in a mostly linoleum room. So there we are infront of a gaudy scene of the beach and a plastic palm, the podium with its bamboo and starfish, and a lady Amanda watched smoke a cigarette about 10 minutes before officiating. I was going to take my cardigan off I remember, but I was so comfortable in it (Pima cotton and cashmere for the win) and we both were so wrapped up in things I didn't remember to. And I don't remember being nervous in particular, just, like LETS GO LETS GO LETS GO LETS GO and bouncing and biting my mouth. I just kind of jiggle through the video. But my god the photos, its just cow eyes all over the place from both of us. We get the rings on, and she pronounces us, and I was so excited I didn't even use tongue. Which surprised Mitchell, which is adorable if he didn't refer to it as me being 'too much tongue girl' most of the time. But I don't know, I was so jittery I couldn't relax for that enough. And its not like we didn't make up for it later.
Courtney and Amanda signed for us, and we took a couple of pictures and then headed out, married and set to go. Courtney went home then but we drove the last mile out to the beach for some pictures on the little boardwalk. WEIRD dude though kept taking pictures of us and saying 'you don't know me' as if that reassured us. So we didn't hang out there too much, but it was enough to get some lovely looking shots of us infront of the beach. We drove Amanda back to her car and then headed out to the apartment to change for dinner. We both had planned vows for this and vows for the big wedding, so on the drive home we told them to each other. I told Mitchell how I never worry about anything because I knew the hardest thing for me to do in life would be to find a partner I loved and who loved me as much as we do, because I never was looking for a relationship or long term anything, I never thought it was possible to work them out, but we have and with that accomplished what else stands in our way? Everything else is easy when the one thing I never thought Id have has happened. He promised to take care of me through everything and to always love me and that he knows he has someone amazing and he is grateful both for me and how I've made him a more awesome person. We continued to be sappy, and then horny, and then finally got home. Amanda came over too, because we knew we'd be going out to eat shortly. But fucking hell if she hadn't we would have never made it out to eat. Handsy, you know. But we changed and after a while and a big ass beer, we went down to outback because I had decided I wanted steak and crab legs for dinner.
Post dinner we came back to the apartment, drank more, played ddr, which I have to say 14 year old me is rather satisfied 24 year old me just married a dude who still kicks some ass at ddr even after 5 years of barely playing. I'm terrible at ddr. I danced for ten years and I have no rhythm at that or guitar hero, which was also on the docket. Eventually we did cake, and more booze, and watched zack and miri make a porno.
Brad came and left, and eventually Amanda left too.
We lasted all of a couple of minutes when she left before getting to the bedroom. Mitchell keeps saying how hot I've gotten since we got married. I would agree, I'm happy, and that shine through like nothing else, so yes my tits do look fantastic I'm in a great mood. I'm on my period, so sex couldn't happen (its not that we're squeamish its that I get UTI's like CRAZY from period sex unless its at the very end) but we made due all the same.
its weird being married, because its the exact same, but for a bit I get to feel even more pumped about this person because we just legally bound ourselves together. But I swear in three weeks at the big wedding, the first person to ask me about a baby I may murder with salad tongs.
I love this ridiculous man.