If I ever become tremendously famous, I intend to name my son Jesus. That way, when I introduce myself by saying, "Hi, I'm Jesus's dad...you might be familiar with my work," it won't seem as though I have a god complex.

This purpose of this post is purely the threefold conveyance of information:
Second: to inform the reader that I am now living in Japan.
Third: to inform the reader that internet access is no longer a strictly meted commodity.

Today I wrote two full scenes for my screenplay and caused perturbation for an Italian woman.

They say there's a time and a place for everything. Now and here are the time and place, respectively, for talking about living in a dump truck. It would be great. You could put a roof on the bed and furnish it up real nice, perhaps like this. Then you could drive around picking up babes, or running them over, as whimsy dictated. What separates ( Read more... )

In response to this, I have just imagined Schnauzer Phone™. This new technological gadget entails a schnauzer with a telephone strapped to its back and given Pavlovian training to seek out the nearest human whenever said phone rings. The best part will almost certainly be the infomercials, hosted by a black turtleneck-clad, beponytailed, fellow ( Read more... )

Three people whose parents intended them to be porn actors:

1.) Randy Johnson
2.) Dick Wolf
3.) President Bush

Although, perhaps, #2 may have been a rejected member of Guitar Wolf..."Dude dude dude dude dude dude, that's not an instrument! You can't play that!"

[Edit] Perhaps it should be mentioned that Guitar Wolf is a band in which all three ( Read more... )

Lately I've begun devoting unhealthy amounts of time to go. A natural consequence, perhaps, has been that the game has started seeping into other areas of my life, like my sanity. I now find myself evaluating the strength and efficiency of everyday shapes with regard to go. For example, my keyboard is simply rife with inefficient and weak shapes ( Read more... )

Two slightly sad, and possibly unconnected things ( Read more... )

Apparently, I am a dangerous role model for old ladies and young girls everywhere. According to a bus driver I met yesterday, when old ladies and young girls see me running to make a bus, they will invariably emulate me, and invariably fall. He then claimed that running was something I was not allowed to do. Now, though, I think that he was ( Read more... )

It's nearing three months since I last wrote something for livejournal's consumption. How about that ( Read more... )