#186 another you
Title: another you
Prompt: #186
Rating: PG-13
Length: ~2130 words
Warning: mention of Luhan and Kris
Summary: then a stranger came along, in the form of someone jongin had been trying to forget forever.
Notes: i've been frequently sick these past few months and college is killing me so i couldn't write a long fic like i've planned before but i hope you like this? i'm sorry if this is not what you had in mind when you prompted this otl. and thank you to my sister, j, for editing this. i love you.
Jongin forgot what the world around him looked like because the moment his gaze fell on someone; he swore the sun-kissed stranger owned his whole world. He was walking down the streets in a quiet manner, wearing a lilac sweater with his hair tied up in a ponytail, but still, he managed to capture Jongin’s attention. The stranger made him forget everything in an instant. Jongin noticed how selfish he was when he didn’t want other people to notice the stranger’s very existence, admiring his beauty and counting every step he made. His mind screamed Go away! Don’t look at him! But he knew, he was the only one who could hear his thoughts.
Jongin noticed how clueless he was when he stepped further, disregarding the honking cars and shouts from people on the pavements as he crossed the busy roads. His steps hurried and he almost stumbled too.
Indeed, he was completely in awe.
Jongin was left perplexed when his heart beat in an incredulous speed as the beautiful stranger walked closer, eyes shifting down on the dusty road, as if they were afraid to be pierced by the gazes of other people who were staring at the both of them.
Wait, why does it feel so familiar?
Jongin squinted, eyes training on each step the stranger carefully took.
Beautiful…
His heart whispered, partly wishing that the man would lift up his gaze and smile. A smile was enough for him. Really.
And the person did, drawing a smile across his face when he walked passed Jongin. Their eyes met, and Jongin couldn’t think of anything else other than the stranger. Sweet fragrance hung in the air despite the speck of dust wavering, hindering him from breathing properly.
Jongin felt stupid when he didn’t stop the man from walking any further away from him. He felt dumb when he didn’t get the chance to ask the stranger’s name. But satisfaction filled his heart when he managed to count the strands of hair that fell softly on the man’s forehead, and how he captured those little moments when the man blinked his eyes when the sun rose high in the sky, hitting his face.
He turned around, and the man had already crossed the roads. Jongin thought he might have gotten a small chance if he run towards the man and introduce himself shamelessly.
But his hopes died down, buried deep under the ground when the man disappeared into the building on the other side of the road, and Jongin was too late to run after him.
A sigh escaped from his lips, but a sense of belongingness took a place in his heart. At least he found what he had been searching for.
He found his new home.
But something was off, and he didn’t know what it was.
“Hey.”
The stranger looked up, eyes scanning up and down at Jongin who was smiling at him.
“H-Have you ordered anything yet?”
“One mocha latte, please.”
Jongin quietly scribbled something down his note, but nervousness took over and the pencil slipped off his grip. He bent down, ears red and lips dry as he picked up the pencil on the floor. He had never been this clumsy. Perhaps, this was the first time he’d been so nervous like this in front of a customer. Or perhaps, it was because of this person he was acting awkwardly.
“I’m really sorry. One mocha latte for you then,” Jongin apologized and bowed, before turning on his heels to hide his embarrassment. But before he could ever take a step away, he heard the soothing voice once again.
“Hey,” the voice called out. Jongin turned around. “You left something on the table.” He drew a smile on his face, before waving a paper in between his slender fingers.
Jongin squinted before taking the paper from the stranger’s hand, not noticing the smile on the other’s face.
There was a name written on the paper along with a telephone number as Jongin walked away from the table. A smile made its way on his face without him knowing it and a few seconds later, a chuckle followed after.
”Oh Sehun,” Jongin mumbled to himself as he tightened the grip on the paper, like he was already used to saying that name every single second.
It was awful.
Trying to act like he never noticed the similarities and everything actually suffocated Jongin. He thought he would get it over with and start with a new life with a new person, but life had its own plan on him. It had been almost a month and he finally figured out why he chose Sehun to be a part of his life. The reason was something that Sehun wouldn’t want to hear, he thought.
When morning arrived and the first thing Jongin would see was Sehun’s face, his mind always screamed and partly wished that he could go back to the past where he didn’t know about Sehun’s existence.
It was terrible when everything was too late and he didn’t have any idea how to fix the mistake. But he guessed, he would just go with the flow and see what fate had prepared for him.
“Stop drinking like that,” Jongin said, eyes shifting over Sehun who was drinking the iced lemon tea. When Sehun didn’t respond, he quickly snatched the glass away from Sehun who was now flustered.
“What are you doing?” Sehun glared at the tanned male, obviously surprised by the sudden action.
“Enough.” Jongin got up and wiped his boyfriend’s lips with his thumb. The displeased look on Jongin’s face made Sehun wonder and somehow confused.
“What’s wrong with you?” Sehun asked, demanding an explanation. Jongin had been weird these days and this kept bugging Sehun’s mind. He needed to know the reason behind all this lousy behavior.
“Next time, don’t lift up your little finger when you are holding the glass,” Jongin said without even looking at the man beside him.
Sehun’s jaw almost dropped at the statement. He shook his head before giving a quick reply, “I will keep doing that unless I’m given an explanation.”
“Just listen to me for once!”
Sehun was taken aback at the shout, but he tried not to take it to heart. Perhaps, it was one of Jongin’s pet peeves. He took the glass from Jongin and began drinking again, ignoring the sharp gaze his boyfriend was giving him. He almost lifted his tiny finger out of his habit as he held the glass, but quickly set it down when he could feel Jongin’s stare seemed to bore into his movement.
It troubled Sehun, but he didn’t say anything for the rest of the day.
Sehun thought that the day would not come again. But he was wrong. Jongin acted all weird again for the nth time. It irked Sehun so much that he didn’t think he would stay still this time around.
“Jongin,” Sehun said when the tanned man suddenly scooted closer to him and sniffed at his sweater. Sehun was dumbfounded and slightly irritated, but he knew he had to stay rational. It wasn’t like he hated being close to Jongin, but this was different and it felt wrong. His patience almost reached its limit, but Sehun completely had no idea how he still managed to put up with Jongin’s behavior.
“How long have you been using this perfume?” Jongin asked, eyes training on the lines on Sehun’s forehead. His hand reached out to touch the strands of Sehun’s hair and tuck some of it behind Sehun’s ear.
“Since four months ago?” Sehun answered, although billions questions were clogged up behind his mind instead. He should be the one who asked any type of questions from now on, not Jongin.
Jongin didn’t answer anything, but the dissatisfying look on his face answered everything as he turned his face around. Sehun somehow knew what would come out of his boyfriend’s mouth.
“I’ll buy you a new perfume,” the male said out of nowhere.
“Jongin.”
Jongin lifted up his eyes. “Yes.”
“Explain this.”
“What do I need to explain?”
“This.”
“Sehun, I just want to buy a new perfume for you, what’s wrong with that?” Jongin asked, feigning innocence.
“Everything. Everything is wrong. From the moment I met you, I knew there’s something you’re hiding from me,” Sehun said quietly.
There was a heavy silence enveloping both of them. Jongin chose to stay silent but Sehun demanded an explanation.
He clearly remembered this one time when Jongin stopped him from walking and even stared at him from head to toes, as if he’d committed a sin. There was this one time when Jongin frequently reminded him to stop having his hair in a ponytail even though it was relatively long compared to Jongin’s. He didn’t understand and he wanted to understand.
“You remind me of someone,” Jongin finally said, voice ever so low and almost couldn’t be heard if Sehun didn’t pay enough attention at all. But still, Sehun managed to capture every single word spoken and his heart almost, almost shattered.
Blinking his eyes, he said, “What?”
Jongin seemed hesitated to nod, but he did anyway. Sehun bit his lips unknowingly.
“Does everything I do remind you of him?” Sehun didn’t want this, but he needed to know. At least, he thought everything should be revealed that day.
“Almost every single thing,” Jongin sighed. The words were heavy and he hated this feeling.
“So, that’s why you’re always like this.”
Jongin didn’t answer.
“Do you-” Sehun sighed. Fuck this. “-do you still love that…person?” His throat was dry, and his mind was screaming to know the person’s name. He didn’t know where he found the courage to ask that question. It didn’t hurt to know, did it?
It took the tanned male a moment to finally reply, and Sehun didn’t know why, but everything around him collapsed.
“Luhan was my first love, and there’s no way I could ever forget him,” Jongin started silently. “Like, I know we broke up because of a stupid thing and I can never forgive him for crushing me like this, but still, knowing me, I’m the type of a person who forgives easily.”
Sehun stayed silent.
“I know I’ve been a total asshole these past few weeks. Reminding you what to do and what not to do. I really thought that both of you are siblings. But then I remember that Luhan doesn’t have any siblings in his family and that somehow relieves me. That’s all because your personality resembles his personality so much. It’s scary to even think about this but even the way you walk and talk remind me of him. How can I simply forget him?”
Silence.
“But I already promised Kris that no matter what happened, I’ll always love you and I will never leave you even if you might hate me after knowing this. I don’t even expect all of these things to happen in my life either. So I hope you will understand. I sincerely love you and that’s all I want you to know.”
Sehun bit his lips again. “But what about Luhan? What if he wants to get back to you? What if you still can’t forget him when you see me almost every day? What if-”
“Shh, past is past, Sehun. There’s no way Luhan could replace you after all he’s done to me,” Jongin cut off, cupping Sehun’s face with both of his hands before they went down to hold Sehun’s shoulders. The younger male tried his hard to process every single word said, and he was completely lost. He waited for Jongin to continue, and the man did.
“I just need some time to get used to all of this and I hope you will understand. It’s fine if you don’t want to change everything I’ve asked you for, but please, don’t leave me. I can’t handle another heartbreak,” Jongin said quietly before letting his hands off Sehun’s shoulders. He breathed in, holding his breath for a moment as if wanting to fill up every single part of his body with Sehun’s scent.
Sehun didn’t know any other way to respond to Jongin’s confession, He ended up hugging his boyfriend so tightly, never wanting to let go.
“I’m sorry, I should’ve asked you before. I didn’t know you have to suffer because of me.”
“Loving you is my choice. You don’t have to worry about that. I’m sorry, Sehun.”
“Don’t be sorry. I understand. I will try to accept this.”
Silence followed but Sehun knew Jongin was listening to every word he said. And when Jongin let go, Sehun found a new hope in the other male’s eyes. He grinned.
“So, should I cut my hair after this?”
Prompt: #186
Rating: PG-13
Length: ~2130 words
Warning: mention of Luhan and Kris
Summary: then a stranger came along, in the form of someone jongin had been trying to forget forever.
Notes: i've been frequently sick these past few months and college is killing me so i couldn't write a long fic like i've planned before but i hope you like this? i'm sorry if this is not what you had in mind when you prompted this otl. and thank you to my sister, j, for editing this. i love you.
Jongin forgot what the world around him looked like because the moment his gaze fell on someone; he swore the sun-kissed stranger owned his whole world. He was walking down the streets in a quiet manner, wearing a lilac sweater with his hair tied up in a ponytail, but still, he managed to capture Jongin’s attention. The stranger made him forget everything in an instant. Jongin noticed how selfish he was when he didn’t want other people to notice the stranger’s very existence, admiring his beauty and counting every step he made. His mind screamed Go away! Don’t look at him! But he knew, he was the only one who could hear his thoughts.
Jongin noticed how clueless he was when he stepped further, disregarding the honking cars and shouts from people on the pavements as he crossed the busy roads. His steps hurried and he almost stumbled too.
Indeed, he was completely in awe.
Jongin was left perplexed when his heart beat in an incredulous speed as the beautiful stranger walked closer, eyes shifting down on the dusty road, as if they were afraid to be pierced by the gazes of other people who were staring at the both of them.
Wait, why does it feel so familiar?
Jongin squinted, eyes training on each step the stranger carefully took.
Beautiful…
His heart whispered, partly wishing that the man would lift up his gaze and smile. A smile was enough for him. Really.
And the person did, drawing a smile across his face when he walked passed Jongin. Their eyes met, and Jongin couldn’t think of anything else other than the stranger. Sweet fragrance hung in the air despite the speck of dust wavering, hindering him from breathing properly.
Jongin felt stupid when he didn’t stop the man from walking any further away from him. He felt dumb when he didn’t get the chance to ask the stranger’s name. But satisfaction filled his heart when he managed to count the strands of hair that fell softly on the man’s forehead, and how he captured those little moments when the man blinked his eyes when the sun rose high in the sky, hitting his face.
He turned around, and the man had already crossed the roads. Jongin thought he might have gotten a small chance if he run towards the man and introduce himself shamelessly.
But his hopes died down, buried deep under the ground when the man disappeared into the building on the other side of the road, and Jongin was too late to run after him.
A sigh escaped from his lips, but a sense of belongingness took a place in his heart. At least he found what he had been searching for.
He found his new home.
But something was off, and he didn’t know what it was.
“Hey.”
The stranger looked up, eyes scanning up and down at Jongin who was smiling at him.
“H-Have you ordered anything yet?”
“One mocha latte, please.”
Jongin quietly scribbled something down his note, but nervousness took over and the pencil slipped off his grip. He bent down, ears red and lips dry as he picked up the pencil on the floor. He had never been this clumsy. Perhaps, this was the first time he’d been so nervous like this in front of a customer. Or perhaps, it was because of this person he was acting awkwardly.
“I’m really sorry. One mocha latte for you then,” Jongin apologized and bowed, before turning on his heels to hide his embarrassment. But before he could ever take a step away, he heard the soothing voice once again.
“Hey,” the voice called out. Jongin turned around. “You left something on the table.” He drew a smile on his face, before waving a paper in between his slender fingers.
Jongin squinted before taking the paper from the stranger’s hand, not noticing the smile on the other’s face.
There was a name written on the paper along with a telephone number as Jongin walked away from the table. A smile made its way on his face without him knowing it and a few seconds later, a chuckle followed after.
”Oh Sehun,” Jongin mumbled to himself as he tightened the grip on the paper, like he was already used to saying that name every single second.
It was awful.
Trying to act like he never noticed the similarities and everything actually suffocated Jongin. He thought he would get it over with and start with a new life with a new person, but life had its own plan on him. It had been almost a month and he finally figured out why he chose Sehun to be a part of his life. The reason was something that Sehun wouldn’t want to hear, he thought.
When morning arrived and the first thing Jongin would see was Sehun’s face, his mind always screamed and partly wished that he could go back to the past where he didn’t know about Sehun’s existence.
It was terrible when everything was too late and he didn’t have any idea how to fix the mistake. But he guessed, he would just go with the flow and see what fate had prepared for him.
“Stop drinking like that,” Jongin said, eyes shifting over Sehun who was drinking the iced lemon tea. When Sehun didn’t respond, he quickly snatched the glass away from Sehun who was now flustered.
“What are you doing?” Sehun glared at the tanned male, obviously surprised by the sudden action.
“Enough.” Jongin got up and wiped his boyfriend’s lips with his thumb. The displeased look on Jongin’s face made Sehun wonder and somehow confused.
“What’s wrong with you?” Sehun asked, demanding an explanation. Jongin had been weird these days and this kept bugging Sehun’s mind. He needed to know the reason behind all this lousy behavior.
“Next time, don’t lift up your little finger when you are holding the glass,” Jongin said without even looking at the man beside him.
Sehun’s jaw almost dropped at the statement. He shook his head before giving a quick reply, “I will keep doing that unless I’m given an explanation.”
“Just listen to me for once!”
Sehun was taken aback at the shout, but he tried not to take it to heart. Perhaps, it was one of Jongin’s pet peeves. He took the glass from Jongin and began drinking again, ignoring the sharp gaze his boyfriend was giving him. He almost lifted his tiny finger out of his habit as he held the glass, but quickly set it down when he could feel Jongin’s stare seemed to bore into his movement.
It troubled Sehun, but he didn’t say anything for the rest of the day.
Sehun thought that the day would not come again. But he was wrong. Jongin acted all weird again for the nth time. It irked Sehun so much that he didn’t think he would stay still this time around.
“Jongin,” Sehun said when the tanned man suddenly scooted closer to him and sniffed at his sweater. Sehun was dumbfounded and slightly irritated, but he knew he had to stay rational. It wasn’t like he hated being close to Jongin, but this was different and it felt wrong. His patience almost reached its limit, but Sehun completely had no idea how he still managed to put up with Jongin’s behavior.
“How long have you been using this perfume?” Jongin asked, eyes training on the lines on Sehun’s forehead. His hand reached out to touch the strands of Sehun’s hair and tuck some of it behind Sehun’s ear.
“Since four months ago?” Sehun answered, although billions questions were clogged up behind his mind instead. He should be the one who asked any type of questions from now on, not Jongin.
Jongin didn’t answer anything, but the dissatisfying look on his face answered everything as he turned his face around. Sehun somehow knew what would come out of his boyfriend’s mouth.
“I’ll buy you a new perfume,” the male said out of nowhere.
“Jongin.”
Jongin lifted up his eyes. “Yes.”
“Explain this.”
“What do I need to explain?”
“This.”
“Sehun, I just want to buy a new perfume for you, what’s wrong with that?” Jongin asked, feigning innocence.
“Everything. Everything is wrong. From the moment I met you, I knew there’s something you’re hiding from me,” Sehun said quietly.
There was a heavy silence enveloping both of them. Jongin chose to stay silent but Sehun demanded an explanation.
He clearly remembered this one time when Jongin stopped him from walking and even stared at him from head to toes, as if he’d committed a sin. There was this one time when Jongin frequently reminded him to stop having his hair in a ponytail even though it was relatively long compared to Jongin’s. He didn’t understand and he wanted to understand.
“You remind me of someone,” Jongin finally said, voice ever so low and almost couldn’t be heard if Sehun didn’t pay enough attention at all. But still, Sehun managed to capture every single word spoken and his heart almost, almost shattered.
Blinking his eyes, he said, “What?”
Jongin seemed hesitated to nod, but he did anyway. Sehun bit his lips unknowingly.
“Does everything I do remind you of him?” Sehun didn’t want this, but he needed to know. At least, he thought everything should be revealed that day.
“Almost every single thing,” Jongin sighed. The words were heavy and he hated this feeling.
“So, that’s why you’re always like this.”
Jongin didn’t answer.
“Do you-” Sehun sighed. Fuck this. “-do you still love that…person?” His throat was dry, and his mind was screaming to know the person’s name. He didn’t know where he found the courage to ask that question. It didn’t hurt to know, did it?
It took the tanned male a moment to finally reply, and Sehun didn’t know why, but everything around him collapsed.
“Luhan was my first love, and there’s no way I could ever forget him,” Jongin started silently. “Like, I know we broke up because of a stupid thing and I can never forgive him for crushing me like this, but still, knowing me, I’m the type of a person who forgives easily.”
Sehun stayed silent.
“I know I’ve been a total asshole these past few weeks. Reminding you what to do and what not to do. I really thought that both of you are siblings. But then I remember that Luhan doesn’t have any siblings in his family and that somehow relieves me. That’s all because your personality resembles his personality so much. It’s scary to even think about this but even the way you walk and talk remind me of him. How can I simply forget him?”
Silence.
“But I already promised Kris that no matter what happened, I’ll always love you and I will never leave you even if you might hate me after knowing this. I don’t even expect all of these things to happen in my life either. So I hope you will understand. I sincerely love you and that’s all I want you to know.”
Sehun bit his lips again. “But what about Luhan? What if he wants to get back to you? What if you still can’t forget him when you see me almost every day? What if-”
“Shh, past is past, Sehun. There’s no way Luhan could replace you after all he’s done to me,” Jongin cut off, cupping Sehun’s face with both of his hands before they went down to hold Sehun’s shoulders. The younger male tried his hard to process every single word said, and he was completely lost. He waited for Jongin to continue, and the man did.
“I just need some time to get used to all of this and I hope you will understand. It’s fine if you don’t want to change everything I’ve asked you for, but please, don’t leave me. I can’t handle another heartbreak,” Jongin said quietly before letting his hands off Sehun’s shoulders. He breathed in, holding his breath for a moment as if wanting to fill up every single part of his body with Sehun’s scent.
Sehun didn’t know any other way to respond to Jongin’s confession, He ended up hugging his boyfriend so tightly, never wanting to let go.
“I’m sorry, I should’ve asked you before. I didn’t know you have to suffer because of me.”
“Loving you is my choice. You don’t have to worry about that. I’m sorry, Sehun.”
“Don’t be sorry. I understand. I will try to accept this.”
Silence followed but Sehun knew Jongin was listening to every word he said. And when Jongin let go, Sehun found a new hope in the other male’s eyes. He grinned.
“So, should I cut my hair after this?”