Hmmm...now you have me very curious as to the 'Living in Sin' challenge requirements. Very, very nice writing, the dialogue is strong and the plot is intriguing. The only suggestion or concrit I would have is this: I noticed just few minor spelling and grammatical errors. Nothing too major and nothing that a good beta wouldn't be able to help you with.
With a bit of polishing this story would really shine. I can't wait to read more!
Thanks for the wonderful review, I will work on the few spelling and grammatical errors...Of course I will also be looking for a beta at the same time.
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Very, very nice writing, the dialogue is strong and the plot is intriguing. The only suggestion or concrit I would have is this: I noticed just few minor spelling and grammatical errors. Nothing too major and nothing that a good beta wouldn't be able to help you with.
With a bit of polishing this story would really shine. I can't wait to read more!
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