Dream? Aye, another dream.
I should update, but I'm too freaking lazy.
Instead, I'll post a dream I had.
And to prove my laziness? I'll simply cut-paste it from where I told a friend about it, minus our screen names. Go laziness!
Well... I was 8 years old, and I was kidnapped. The guy that kidnapped me, in my dream, had raped me a year ago, and I was terrified of him.
And he had me in this truck, or car with him... that changed a bit in the dream. Sometimes a truck, sometimes a car.
But he was having me do errands with him. He said he wanted to be able to trust me.
Friend: Raped you in the dream? Or, the history of the dream?
Me: The history of the dream.
I remember he was buying chocolate or something from this woman at the side of the road. He had me give her the money, and I said, "Here you go!" and very quietly, I whispered, "Please help me, he's kidnapping me, please help me." and got back in the car with him. I knew if I ran, he'd catch me.
In the dream, I'd earlier broken my leg, and so I was limping heavily, and in pain.
I think I had a cast on it.
So I convinced him to trust me, and as soon as he did, I tried to get away... but he caught me, and he shook his head at me.
I remember sobbing, and being scared that he'd rape me again. And he drove all the way to New York with me, not talking much.
I tried to talk to the cops in New York, but they wouldn't believe me. I kept trying to get people to believe me, but no one there believed that I was kidnapped-- only people from back home would believe me.
He had me apply for a job as a model, because in the dream I was a very pretty little girl, and looked much older than my age.
The job turned out to be for a place that had an escort service, or something, and I was terrified. I was a virgin, unless you count the incident from the year earlier. But there was something special about me, and they put me in some kind of leadership role, or quasi-leadership.
I was wheeling and dealing and stuff. It was neat, and I felt good about it. I felt like I was more important than I'd been back home. I actually grew to love it.
The guy who'd kidnapped me, I lived with him, and he was nice now, somehow. Never hurt me, and I had a chance to get 'hold of people at home, and I didn't.
I wanted to stay in New York, and I loved it there.
There was something about a high-level guy who was going to out this other woman, and she had... there was something about some other higher-level guy who had been killed. He'd been encased in something that looked like thin white soap, but they made him write out a diary each day of how they'd trapped him.
So she had this proof, so he had to stay with the company.
I was glad not to be involved in this, and I saw two slavegirls being raped by their masters, and I was glad I'd avoided that. I was gunning for the top slot, thinking I'd be able to help them when I had more power.
And then I saw, at the entrance to where I was, two cops with insignia telling me they were from back home. Back home, in the dream, wasn't exactly Granite. It was someplace with the initials FH or FM or something, and the symbol of a tree, in green.
Which I suppose could be a subconscious reference to Forest Pharm, where I used to work.
But anyway, I saw them asking about something at the receptionist. I got a sick feeling; I knew they were there for me.
I managed to avoid them, but when I saw more of them outside the building, I knew, I just knew I'd be taken away.
I tried to get back to the home I had with the guy, to tell him what was happening-- I desperately wanted to escape with him.
At first, he thought I'd betrayed him, and he left me. I was sad, felt like the world was crashing around my shoulders.
Someone back home was saying that they hadn't known I was gone, or where I'd gone, until they saw my picture in the paper for up-and-coming executives.
And so they'd told the police, and here they were.
I ran to the top part of the building I worked at, and stood on the edge of this ledge. Slavegirls lined it, and I could see cops coming for me. I also saw that the company was going to be in trouble-- I knew far too much, and plus having the cops around, they'd get in trouble for raping the slavegirls and for the man encased in soap.
I wanted anything but to go with the cops, so I dove off the ledge, and it seemed to go forever down until I hit water.
And the man was there, but I couldn't reach him; the current was too strong.
And something happened I can't remember, and then I was hauled up by some kind of machine. A guy from the company who kind of loved me help me get free, but I got caught again, and they hauled me back home.
I was only 8 years old, but I felt like an adult, who was suddenly thrust back into childhood.
I had no control over my life, and I kept thinking about my old job in New York, and knowing it'd never be the same. I was really sad.
And then I woke up.
The dream's been at the front of my brain tonight... so there you go. Maybe I'll actually update at some point.
EDIT: Peverel had a good point: dream was too long, and fairly disturbing. Now behind an LJ cut tag for your convenience.
Instead, I'll post a dream I had.
And to prove my laziness? I'll simply cut-paste it from where I told a friend about it, minus our screen names. Go laziness!
Well... I was 8 years old, and I was kidnapped. The guy that kidnapped me, in my dream, had raped me a year ago, and I was terrified of him.
And he had me in this truck, or car with him... that changed a bit in the dream. Sometimes a truck, sometimes a car.
But he was having me do errands with him. He said he wanted to be able to trust me.
Friend: Raped you in the dream? Or, the history of the dream?
Me: The history of the dream.
I remember he was buying chocolate or something from this woman at the side of the road. He had me give her the money, and I said, "Here you go!" and very quietly, I whispered, "Please help me, he's kidnapping me, please help me." and got back in the car with him. I knew if I ran, he'd catch me.
In the dream, I'd earlier broken my leg, and so I was limping heavily, and in pain.
I think I had a cast on it.
So I convinced him to trust me, and as soon as he did, I tried to get away... but he caught me, and he shook his head at me.
I remember sobbing, and being scared that he'd rape me again. And he drove all the way to New York with me, not talking much.
I tried to talk to the cops in New York, but they wouldn't believe me. I kept trying to get people to believe me, but no one there believed that I was kidnapped-- only people from back home would believe me.
He had me apply for a job as a model, because in the dream I was a very pretty little girl, and looked much older than my age.
The job turned out to be for a place that had an escort service, or something, and I was terrified. I was a virgin, unless you count the incident from the year earlier. But there was something special about me, and they put me in some kind of leadership role, or quasi-leadership.
I was wheeling and dealing and stuff. It was neat, and I felt good about it. I felt like I was more important than I'd been back home. I actually grew to love it.
The guy who'd kidnapped me, I lived with him, and he was nice now, somehow. Never hurt me, and I had a chance to get 'hold of people at home, and I didn't.
I wanted to stay in New York, and I loved it there.
There was something about a high-level guy who was going to out this other woman, and she had... there was something about some other higher-level guy who had been killed. He'd been encased in something that looked like thin white soap, but they made him write out a diary each day of how they'd trapped him.
So she had this proof, so he had to stay with the company.
I was glad not to be involved in this, and I saw two slavegirls being raped by their masters, and I was glad I'd avoided that. I was gunning for the top slot, thinking I'd be able to help them when I had more power.
And then I saw, at the entrance to where I was, two cops with insignia telling me they were from back home. Back home, in the dream, wasn't exactly Granite. It was someplace with the initials FH or FM or something, and the symbol of a tree, in green.
Which I suppose could be a subconscious reference to Forest Pharm, where I used to work.
But anyway, I saw them asking about something at the receptionist. I got a sick feeling; I knew they were there for me.
I managed to avoid them, but when I saw more of them outside the building, I knew, I just knew I'd be taken away.
I tried to get back to the home I had with the guy, to tell him what was happening-- I desperately wanted to escape with him.
At first, he thought I'd betrayed him, and he left me. I was sad, felt like the world was crashing around my shoulders.
Someone back home was saying that they hadn't known I was gone, or where I'd gone, until they saw my picture in the paper for up-and-coming executives.
And so they'd told the police, and here they were.
I ran to the top part of the building I worked at, and stood on the edge of this ledge. Slavegirls lined it, and I could see cops coming for me. I also saw that the company was going to be in trouble-- I knew far too much, and plus having the cops around, they'd get in trouble for raping the slavegirls and for the man encased in soap.
I wanted anything but to go with the cops, so I dove off the ledge, and it seemed to go forever down until I hit water.
And the man was there, but I couldn't reach him; the current was too strong.
And something happened I can't remember, and then I was hauled up by some kind of machine. A guy from the company who kind of loved me help me get free, but I got caught again, and they hauled me back home.
I was only 8 years old, but I felt like an adult, who was suddenly thrust back into childhood.
I had no control over my life, and I kept thinking about my old job in New York, and knowing it'd never be the same. I was really sad.
And then I woke up.
The dream's been at the front of my brain tonight... so there you go. Maybe I'll actually update at some point.
EDIT: Peverel had a good point: dream was too long, and fairly disturbing. Now behind an LJ cut tag for your convenience.