like.. decisions are hard

[mallrat_ellie]

For what seemed like an eternity, Ellie just sat there staring at the blank page in her journal. She wasn’t really sure what she wanted to write or really what she needed to write. The decision that had been laid before her was uncomfortably difficult. It was then an idea hit her. She would write them each letters.. one saying that she chose

Comments

[_jack_]

Coming to a sliding halt in Ellie's doorway, Jack paused, she was on the bed, face down. "Ellie!" He rushed into her room, kneeling down next to the bed, "Are you ok, what happened?" He gave her a quick shake, "Ellie answer me, please, are you alright?" Well, she was breathing, and making some kind of noise, so she had to be ok. "Don't," he began, pausing and faltering, "Don't you want to talk? I, look I know I said I wouldn't talk to you today, did," his mind went a million miles a minute with explainations

[mallrat_ellie]

With her head buried in the blankets, she was finally able to release a garbled cry again before the tears she had been holding back for days came flooding to the surface. By the time Jack had gotten there, she was almost into a full fledge tearful fit. She was breathing, but it was starting to come ragged and more rapidly. Her shoulders tipped down towards the bed were beginning to shake from the effort she was exerting to keep herself from repeating the shriek earlier. Are you ok, what happened?" …."Ellie answer me, please, are you alright?"… "Don't," …"Don't you want to talk? I, look I know I said I wouldn't talk to you today, did," It took a few moments before the words he spoke made it to her brain. She felt him shake her, and in response she let out a whimper.

Are you alright Ellie? After his said her name again, she knew it was Jack. Suddenly a new flood of emotions flew through her body. Had she been that loud? She didn’t mean to cause any more drama in the mall. All she needed was just to release it all.

[_jack_]

Jack watched, worried, as Ellie sobbed and hiccuped into the bed, a look of concerned confusion passing over his face when she finally sat up, the look on her face, shattered, it hurt his heart for her. She looked as if she was about to break into a million pieces, and instantly Jack thought of Luke, he could have been the only person to do this to Ellie! Anger flashed in his eyes, and had Ellie not looked so completely forlorn, he would have gotten up, marched upstairs, and beaten Luke's face in

[mallrat_ellie]

When Jack wrapped his arms around her, Ellie began to feel better. It felt right that he was there for her and a part of her was so afraid that if she didn’t choose Jack, he would remove himself from her life again. She couldn’t handle that. Jack was her best friend. He had always been and she hoped he would always be. But she felt deep down that Jack would be shattered if she chose Luke. That he would run away and never come back. She began to calm herself and finally felt that she could form some words. "It's ok Ellie, what's got you so upset?" “Jack… I’m so afraid that no matter what I do, two people are going to be crushed. I’m so terrified that if I choose Luke, you’ll leave or you won’t want to see me again. And if I choose you, Luke will leave, and he needs the protection of the Mall.. people out there still hold the Chosen over his head.” She paused there for a moment, moving slightly away from him, but still in his arms. There was enough distance where she could look into his eyes. The sadness was still there in

[_jack_]

Jack nodded that he understood, she didn't mean to cause him pain, it was just a side effect of love. He knew she needed to talk to Luke now, Jack could release her and let her go as much as he was able, but it was really up to Ellie and Luke now. He would never force her to be with Luke, everyone deserved to make their own choices, and he remembered now how Luke had once walked away from everything he had with Ellie because it would hurt her too much to stay. Perhaps he had returned now because things were different, the Chosen were a distant memory, and Luke had nothing to do with the Technos, he was no longer the city's enemy, none of them seemed to care about much these days other than killing each other. Their world..would it ever not be in turmoil

[mallrat_ellie]

She knew he understood what she was saying, but a part of her couldn’t believe that he was willing to let her go… to step back so she could better decide. Was it better for one of them just to walk away? No, this was the choice that she needed to make, and she was going to make it soon. She had too. As he sat there going over his thoughts, she wondered what he was thinking. Did he really believe in what he was doing? Would he regret it later that he walked away? She shook the thoughts from her mind. She couldn’t try to foresee the future. That always got her in trouble. It was times like this she wished there was a magic 8 ball that knew all the right answers

[_jack_]

Jack had worried, would she let him kiss her, would she hit him? Would she pull away like last time? He was pleased to find her relaxing into it, responding to the kiss, and his mind was blank, focused only on her lips, on the feeling of her warm body pressed against his, her soft golden hair smelled so good. He didn't even think about how this went against everything he'd said, what he was feeling, what he believed, he couldn't bear to see her crying, that look in her eyes, he couldn't resist. Jack shifted and hugged her again, deepening the kiss, it was like old times, just as he remembered only, different some how

[mallrat_ellie]

Ellie closed her eyes as the kissed, maybe as a subconscious way to connection with him more.. to search out and feel him better. She tried not to think about anything else and only about her and Jack. At first it was working. She focused on his body’s reaction to her, but when he deepened the kiss, her head began swimming with too many emotions. She had wanted him to kiss her, but did he kiss her because he wanted to, or because he couldn’t bare to see her cry. It was a common reaction he had when she cried