it is 6am and im not asleep.obviously.not tired and I dont sleep when I am not tired. no point. I rented children on the corn 666. Good movie. I am in a weird situation in my life right now. I wish I could better explain. People thought for a while Colin and I were dating which is UNTRUE. Me and Nate had gotten into a fight as well as me and Sean. ( Read more... )

nothing makes to much sence right now and with all honesty...I hate it.all i can seem to do is cry.it is the only thing that makes me feel some what better. Why is it that I feel I have no one when I need someone the most?I dont know. am I over reacting? I am doing everything possible and I am running out of things.I mean damn is it to much to ask ( Read more... )

hmm things have been really good and really bad.I have been having a pretty decent life but people have been telling me and others that they think I am dating Colin. Dating someone, yes. Colin, no.Seanm yes. I dont know what to do anymore...grr.maybe play in traffic...sounds good. I am going to go see a movie with Jim and ppl tonight and thats ( Read more... )

laying in bed at 5:30 am with the light on crying to my pillow about how much things make me worry. I dont want to be this way. Why do I have to worry. someone tell me please.I just want to live my life w/o looking back and saying 'damn I should or shouldent have done that'I want so smile when I have no reason to.I want every kiss I to mean ( Read more... )

tonight was fun. Colin came and picked me up and we went back to his house.I listened to him play guitar and bass, then I made an attempt to spell dirty things on his refigerator with his word magnent thingies. Then we watched The Last Samuri (sp) which was fun because we made fun of the entire movie, Colin added his stupid Japanese accent and ( Read more... )

ugh. I feel like I am falling apart. I am doing everything I can to hold on to what makes me happy. I believed it would be different this time. I am so damn insecure. I always think that I am going to lose everything that makes me happy. I am going to die.
untill lext time...

hey. how is it going.things are weird for me right now. I went to Nate's house, I think him and James had a better time than I did, we roasted marshmellows, would have been more fun with sean but ya.me and him have been a bit iffy but I am sure things will work out. My parents still fight alot, they need to divorce and get it over with and quit ( Read more... )

woot! I have a fun and sexy lay out thingie for my LJ and its all thanks to Nate. THANK YOU! I love it! Anywho im bored. I dont like it I have been up way to long.and im not tired. is that healthy? idk. Gene came over today, im glad, I havent seen him in like a year.It was fun. I am pretty confused about alot of shit right now. And it sux ass. I ( Read more... )

At like 10pm Nate,Colin,Zoila and some other guy ( i need to learn his name) came over and we went swimming, again. lol. I smoked pot (beats up self) I need to stop. Anywho I guess we were to loud and we go kicked out of the pool by the manager lady. She is a huge bitch. After swimming, Colin took Zoila home, which we think they fucked in the ( Read more... )

good morning. I have been awake for like 5 minutes and im all like blah! I went to sleep at like 2am and then was awaken my Nate at 4am-ish.uhm, I missed Nikki's bday party, I bet she hates me. Andrew hates me to. But I will live.uhm, what to say wat to say? I am pretty hungry, I want something sweet like cake.or sean. I have a headache and i dont ( Read more... )