Mar 01, 2010 23:00
[This voice may sound very, very familiar to some residents.]
Oh goodness!
My my, so! I imagine all of you are wondering what's going on here! I know, we don't contact you very much, but gracious me this should change! Yes. Yes, the best working relationships rely on communication and such and lovely things like that. So I shall be communicating with you, and some day we'll have some semblance of a professional acquaintance.
Possibly.
Oh, but of course the Great One has spoken to you concerning our offer! I heard that he would from the previous management, yes, and the Great One is nothing if not thorough! Naturally, I imagine he informed you of the circumstances of the agreement, but for those of you unfortunate enough to miss an audience with him, I shall summarize!
You will be contracted to fight in various skirmishes to which we will transport you in exchange for more modern accommodations within your enclosure (electricity/energy, appliances, central lighting and heat) and perhaps an end to the experimentation, if all goes well. Naturally, when you are out we will provide you with world-class accommodations! Anything your heart could desire for your quarters- well, within reason. We're not miracle workers after all! [Have a joyful laugh!]
Likewise, if you require special tools or vehicles for battle, we will do our best to provide those as well. You need only ask!
So, I ask of you, are you interested? It would be wonderful if we could put an end to all this!
malnosso,
the eccentric