Animal-related guilt

[mamagotcha]

When I got Bill, I also got his two cats (littermates, about a year old). I've never been a cat person, but we seemed to reach a place of co-existence. When they had problems, I did research to figure out how to fix them. I don't think of them as my cats, but they made Bill happy so I did what I could to keep them healthy and content

Comments

[paulaandandrew]

I would consider confining them to one room with a removable, cleanable rug. Preferably a room where you all go in regularly and give them attention.

[jedusor]

Ugh. If people are going to domesticate animals, they need to take responsibility for having domesticated them. Don't fucking kill your pets when they stop suiting your needs. And don't bring this up to me in real time because I will end up yelling at you about Wiley.

[mamagotcha]

Oh Julia... the incontinence was only one thing. He was in pain and taking pain meds constantly, he couldn't do the stairs (we had to help him up and down), he got really confused and scared at the dog park, he dug into the snow and wouldn't come out, he kept barking and "looking" for someone, something... and didn't know us. He had repeated attacks of vestibular disturbance (like being seasick on dry land) and couldn't eat, drink or walk... Clay was part of the decision, and I would NOT have done it without him being on board (and I think he may have thought I even dragged things on a little too long). There were no good answers... his poor doggy brain was going and his body was failing too

[jedusor]

Mhm. And you just happened to reach this humane, merciful, selfless decision right before that road trip that made caring for him inconvenient. Really, you do not want to have this conversation with me. (Or with Cord.)

[mamagotcha]

Caring for him was "inconvenient" for many months, for YEARS, before that, Julia. There were many days that I was ready to cancel the trip because I knew caring for him was more than Bill or Clay could easily deal with; both of them were planning to take turns coming home in the middle of the day to help him... Bill was even looking at rearranging his teaching schedule to be able to do it, and we had hired someone to come on the days neither could be here. He could not get in or out of a car on his own, and it took two adults to get him in, and he freaked out each time we did it; I could not bring him with me like I'd done for other trips. Bill and Clay had both made the commitment to be there for Wiley long before I made the decision to go on the road trip. I would not have planned the trip if I hadn't known he would have been cared for while I was gone

[corva]

Lady - do give me a call if you'd like. My number remains the same.

[lorraine_inwa]

You all have done what you could to give them a safe healthy existence but now you are all miserable. Enough already.

[ext_1102168]

Ugh, I feel for you and I wish I had an answer. I have been a cat person for my entire life, in fact a few years ago I would've said I would always have at least one cat. Then in the past few years something has changed and I don't really even understand what. I think it's partly because cats are a lovely low-maintenance companion but when they suddenly become high-maintenance, well... they are not really a good-enough companion to be worth the PITA stuff. Honestly If it weren't for our kids' attachment to our cats, I would seriously think about re-homing the cats, or at least the younger two. However they would come as a pair, one with a special diet/urinating/pooping/yakking issue so I don't think I could find him a home very easily. We do confine our cats to the basement laundry room every night, and sometimes for part or all of the day depending on if we'll be home and what's going on with the above-mentioned issue. It doesn't seem fair to them but I'm not sure what else to do. And they do live a very long time. *sigh*