ugg...for the last few days i haven't gotton through on LJ or by the time i did i couldn't remember what i wanted to say. and now i get through and i don't have anything to say. ugg..my timing sucks ( Read more... )

i have always felt like a ghost ( Read more... )

i have always felt like a ghost ( Read more... )

i hate the awkward moment of silence between me and my sister. its always related to something sad and depressing. like this morning at breakfast, we were talking about when we were younger and how i drank a shit load of mountain dew. then she said Judd used to drink a lot of mountain dew. yes i knew that. i would go drink and play video games ( Read more... )

i am crying tonight for a well worth cause ( Read more... )

still no word from her father.
why does he tell me he wants to be involved in her life when we both know he doesn't?

drip drop
a tear falls
why
am i sad?
am i happy?
am i confused and flustered?
a drink
a drink to make the worries go away

its never quiet ( Read more... )

i am angry and bitter, and i will admit a little jealous ( Read more... )

i looked at the kids head tonight. its not as bad as i expected but it is longer than i imagined. it will be a long month with the bandage on. i still can't believe she is one. she is such a wonderful little kid and i am so damn lucky to have her.