DABB: Spectrum Ch 1 part 1 838 words
Starkhaven.
Fenris was sure that if he had not ended up in Kirkwall, he would have made it to Starkhaven. He left a thought at the edge of his imagination, the thought that even under different circumstances he would have met Sebastian Vael. He was not used to indulging in fantasy, and could not craft a story like Varric could, so the gaps of how and why turned into territory he could not cross.
Starkhaven seemed very far away.
The fires that had burned through Kirkwall had gone out one by one through the long night, leaving a morning air that was neither mist nor smoke. Every breath was a reminder, even when his eyes were closed to the destruction, even when his back was turned, when he ignored the talk around him. Some people wandered the streets as if lost. He didn't want to be one of them.
"Fenris." Hawke waved to him from the door of her estate. "Come in."
Inside, he was not surprised to see that Anders was still under Hawke's protection. Bodahn and Sandal were in travelling gear, their luggage gathered near them.
Hawke followed his gaze. "They're going to Orlais. I'm leaving too. With Anders."
"You are sure?"
Hawke nodded.
Fenris looked over at Anders, who was facing the unlit fireplace. "And then? What city will you destroy next?"
"None." One syllable from Anders. Bitter, emphatic.
Sebastian would find them, if he was determined. "Are you coming back?"
Hawke shook her head. "I don't know."
There was no more Champion of Kirkwall. That too had changed. "Life on the run..." It was something they had all experienced.
"I'll be careful." Hawke sighed and looked around. "If you stay... This house, I want it to be here for Bethany. Even if neither of us comes back for years, it's still ours."
Fenris couldn't make any promises. "Where is she?"
"Already gone. And Isabela's getting us out. If you want to see her... come with us to the docks."
Isabela. He had the desire to see her before she left, but not to trouble her to stop and talk. "There is no need for me to go. But tell her I wish her well."
"I will."
Hawke nodded and picked up the pack she was taking with her. Anders had a similar one, and Fenris left the estate to get out of their way.
Bodahn stopped by him and gave Fenris a gracious goodbye before heading off with Sandal. Anders walked a few steps away.
"Here." Hawke pressed a key into his hand. "I really... I hope to see you again, one day. You have been a good friend. And I want you to be happy." She smiled.
"Thank you, Hawke."
The key was warm but her hands were cold. She let go.
"Goodbye, Fenris."
He thought of Sebastian again.
Fenris had stayed for Hawke, and now they were both gone. He understood both their reasons but felt the pang of uncertainty follow him everywhere. He had stopped running, made a new life. Now everyone else was moving on. Starkhaven beckoned, an invitation, an opportunity.
Yet he did not find the urge to leave Kirkwall.
Careful as he was through the chantry courtyard, the debris still pressed into the soles of his feet. He stopped to look up. The statue of the Maker had remained standing, although no longer fully upright from the force of the blast. Scars of black and layers of dust that had fallen through the night took away the familiar shine, the gold almost grey in the dull morning light. No longer surrounded by the warmth of red candles, the exposed statue rose from the rubble to loom over the city, looking up at the sky.
A few guards and a templar lingered at the edges, kicking obstructions out of the way, dissuading citizens from getting too close. Even now the broken chantry crumbled and collapsed, sending the odd piece of rubble onto the cleared paths.
They would have to pull out the bodies. The fleeting what if of Sebastian being one of them was enough to disorient him for a horrible moment. He had been staring for a few minutes when he heard his name.
Donnic's voice. "Everything all right?"
Fenris glanced at him and nodded. With everything that had happened, Aveline and Cullen were the highest ranking leaders in the city, and everyone would be looking to them. "Aveline taken a break yet?"
"Not since she woke up, that I know of."
"Does she know about Hawke?"
Donnic gave a nod. He looked over at his fellow guards. "She just told me. We have a busy day ahead, but I'm sure your company will be appreciated."
"I will see if I can be of any help."
"That would be welcome." Donnic said, before leaving him to cross the courtyard.
Hawke's key had left an imprint in his hand. Fenris flexed his fingers and walked through into the hall of his mansion. The Hawke estate, empty. Like his own.