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[blissfulmisses]

I'm 23, and was just diagnosed "bipolar" - "atypical" bipolar last month - but refuse to accept labels that attempt to define my mental state and personality. I was also diagnosed ADHD and with PTSD, from my childhood with an epileptic, schizophrenic/bipolar mother (the meds/electric shock treatment have erased her mania and made her strictly

Comments

[dying_in_stereo]

you were beautiful before and you are beautiful now.

welcome to bi-polar land. I really was in denial myself when i was diagnosed because I always thought bi-polar meant OMG YOU'RE SO CRAZY!! but it doesnt have to mean that :)

ADHD. i dunno. I think its a hoaxy diagnosis for someone who just isnt interesting in paying attention in school because its boring. to me it just seems like a cop out diagnosis.

I was diagnosed ADHD as a kid and they pumped me full of adderall. by the time i was 13 i was abusing it and taking more than the prescribed dose and by 15 i was up to 5-10 adderall pills a day and mixing with harder drugs.

and i never ate. I was so thin.

[blissfulmisses]

I either have ADHD or have mania that is fixed by amphetamines. I have a hyperactive brain. I do very well in school because I multi-task. I always need to do 2 things at once to successfully complete a task (watch TV while reading, listen to music while studying, play with my hair while talking and thinking of something else - reading 5+ books at a time, etc). My brain becomes swarmed with all things at once - and has difficulty compartmentalizing. On adderal, my brain is *quiet* - and I can even sleep. So it's a true chemical imbalance - you know, sleeping on speed is usually not the norm ;)

[dying_in_stereo]

Im the same like with the TV and reading or TV and homework. I need background noise. it's not that Im necessarily even paying enough attention to it. I just need the noise. I like noise when I go to bed too. I would prefer to leave the TV on, but my boyfriend absolutely despises it and can't sleep. I just deal with the quiet.

[brookeislove]

That definitely sounds like A.D.D. I was diagnosed with it when i was very young. I have refused to take medications since I was in high school and have adopted techniques that help me cope with he way I do things. It still makes things a bit harder though. I like how you have described the A.D.D mind. That is exactly how it is. I have always described it as my mind changing channels on a T.V. I can really be interested in something or even want focus on something and its nearly impossible. Background noise helps. It amazing how much it helps. I have music on 24 hrs. a day practically. It helps slow or quiet the thoughts in my head. it really is something there are numerous studies that actually document the real difference in A.D.D brains. I would take the medications for A.D.D it helps. However, I get anxiety attacks from stimulants. So, that's something I prefer to avoid like the plague.