birthdays, surguries, and other things

[mariabutterfly]

So I actually know I few people whose birthday is coming up including Lilly and my own on the 22. Happy Birthday Lilly. I never know what to ask for. I have always thought it slightly strange that you are allowed to be completely greedy on your birthday. I despise feeling greedy it hurts seriously. Maybe that is why I never know what to ask for. I

Comments

RE:

[neonfairy]

Hooray for Birthdays!!!
Happy b-day

[mariabutterfly]

Thanks. It's not so much that I think I will die young or that dying young is a bad thing. Sometimes I think I would prefer that. It's a funny thing though we never really take anything seriously unless it affects us. I write about my medical crap simply to try to shine a light that it does affect real people that no matter how happy someone seems everyone has problems. I hope at least one person will realize wow I don't have it so bad; I know I do. I try to live in the moment which is why I rarely plan anything. Which I know sometimes annoys Dennis, but we have fun anyway don't we? It's not entirely altrustic I mean part of it is that I want people to better understand why I do the things that I do to have a deeper understanding of me.

[neonfairy]

I see. But dont worry too much. You DO have it better than others. One way or another, we all have problems and those problems are amplified because they belong to us. I can't see your problems or feel them the way you do, the same way you can't do that with mine. You don't have to plan everything, try to go with the flow sometimes. Do something that you've never done before. Step out of the norm. Jump on that puddle like when you were 5 just because you can. Life is only as good or bad as we choose to see it. There's always gonna be someone better and worse than you. Someone with better and worse qualities. With a better and worse life. The key is to stop comparisons and shrugging at what life throws at you and just shine in your own light. Then is when people start realizing, hey, she's got it bad but that's not bringing her down. You're an awesome human being from what I've heard and read! You deserve to be happy but only you can take yourself there! ;)