summer, summer, when all you wish for is another...
Oh le sigh.
School is coming.
I don't want that.
But at the same time, I do!
This is wierd.
maridan : : I won't waste a single tear : : a l o n e says:
wow. I do feel really wierd right now.
brooke says: yeah.. you sohuld know that you're so important to so many people. i've thought about you a lot this summer to be honest. i really admire you. you inspire me and i've thought about a lot of our times together a lot and i really want to do the once a lunch hour a week thing.. i cant believe you feel alone because so many people love oy.
brooke says: you
.....
maridan : : I won't waste a single tear : : a l o n e : : when all you wish for is another... says:
brooke, I was a bitch.
brooke says:
i don't thikn you were at all
brooke says:
honestly.
brooke says:
he was the bitch, thus giving you reasons to break it off.
maridan : : I won't waste a single tear : : a l o n e : : when all you wish for is another... says:
hahaha
brooke says:
its a good point though!
maridan : : I won't waste a single tear : : a l o n e : : when all you wish for is another... says:
yeah, true
maridan : : I won't waste a single tear : : a l o n e : : when all you wish for is another... says:
but he didn't really...do anything wrong.
brooke says:
what exactly was it?
maridan : : I won't waste a single tear : : a l o n e : : when all you wish for is another... says:
I just felt...posessed.
maridan : : I won't waste a single tear : : a l o n e : : when all you wish for is another... says:
like, I belonged to somebody who wasn't me.
maridan : : I won't waste a single tear : : a l o n e : : when all you wish for is another... says:
and I didn't like that at all.
brooke says:
yeah, no wonder. and once you did it you had to experiance being on your own all over again and thats something that i think is soo important.. like being able to be alone. so it was a good thing to learn from.
maridan : : I won't waste a single tear : : a l o n e : : when all you wish for is another... says:
yeah. thanks for bending this the right way for me doll.
brooke says:
no problem m-d, you shuold never have any regrets about that. certain events afterwards proved that you did the right thing.
maridan : : I won't waste a single tear : : a l o n e : : when all you wish for is another... says:
exactly.
brooke says:
it made you a stronger person, and thats incredible because you're already one of if not the strongest person i know. i honestly sound like a groupie or something, damn it but iive thought about it a lot this summer really and i just want you to know how much respect i have for you.. even though i sound like a weird nut ot something haha
maridan : : I won't waste a single tear : : a l o n e : : when all you wish for is another... says:
no regrets
maridan : : I won't waste a single tear : : a l o n e : : when all you wish for is another... says:
brooke. I don't think that you have any idea how much that means to me. wow.
maridan : : I won't waste a single tear : : a l o n e : : when all you wish for is another... says:
I'm going to have to write more....
brooke says:
i'm so glad because i've been wanting to get it out! haha you have no idea how much time i've had to think about everything this summer.. family vacations where basically i sat on the beach for a week. and you would just come into my head. a lot of the time i thought about that day in mr wards little room when we talked about your dad. or the time you me and jeremy were in mrs. petersens room
maridan : : I won't waste a single tear : : a l o n e : : when all you wish for is another... says:
oh I know! I've thought about that SO much too. I just want it all back...I mean, we have to move on but I'm going to miss that so much. It was so....real. Like, we weren't acting or trying to impress anyone. we were just being ourselves. really.
brooke says:
yeah i know, there was absolutely no bullshit. and like we didn't have to talk the whole time. we could just sit.
maridan : : I won't waste a single tear : : a l o n e : : when all you wish for is another... says:
yup.
maridan : : I won't waste a single tear : : a l o n e : : when all you wish for is another... says:
just chill.
maridan : : I won't waste a single tear : : a l o n e : : when all you wish for is another... says:
that....that made my year.
maridan : : I won't waste a single tear : : a l o n e : : when all you wish for is another... says:
that was THE year. everything...grade 9 was the best year of my life.
brooke says:
yeah. me too. easily.
maridan : : I won't waste a single tear : : a l o n e : : when all you wish for is another... says:
I've felt the most emotion in the last 5 months than I have in my whole being.
maridan : : I won't waste a single tear : : a l o n e : : when all you wish for is another... says:
ever.
brooke says:
me too!!!
brooke says:
i think .. i can speak for both of us .. or me i know that i learned a lot about myself this year
brooke says:
or at least
maridan : : I won't waste a single tear : : a l o n e : : when all you wish for is another... says:
definitely.
brooke says:
became more comfortable with me
maridan : : I won't waste a single tear : : a l o n e : : when all you wish for is another... says:
I would agree whole-heartedly.
maridan : : I won't waste a single tear : : a l o n e : : when all you wish for is another... says:
oh yeah.
maridan : : I won't waste a single tear : : a l o n e : : when all you wish for is another... says:
I just...I go back and everything that I felt was so pure and uninhibited.
brooke says:
yeah i know. you know what, who says we have to lose that. i know its going to be hard. but i just dont want to lose myself in high school.
maridan : : I won't waste a single tear : : a l o n e : : when all you wish for is another... says:
oh I know.
maridan : : I won't waste a single tear : : a l o n e : : when all you wish for is another... says:
with the me that I found this year, I'm so worried about loosing her.
maridan : : I won't waste a single tear : : a l o n e : : when all you wish for is another... says:
the person I am can chill with Jeremy and Brooke in Mrs Petersen's room in 3rd period and talk about regular teenage shit, have lunch at neptune and then work at camp in the evenings and rock out till my skull's going to break.
maridan : : I won't waste a single tear : : a l o n e : : when all you wish for is another... says:
I just.
maridan : : I won't waste a single tear : : a l o n e : : when all you wish for is another... says:
I can't let go of that.
maridan : : I won't waste a single tear : : a l o n e : : when all you wish for is another... says:
everl
maridan : : I won't waste a single tear : : a l o n e : : when all you wish for is another... says:
this is me.
maridan : : I won't waste a single tear : : a l o n e : : when all you wish for is another... says:
I can't.
brooke says:
yeh exactly.. and with me its like.. i dont want to lose not being afraid to say what i think, and do my own thing is instead of following
maridan : : I won't waste a single tear : : a l o n e : : when all you wish for is another... says:
exactly.
maridan : : I won't waste a single tear : : a l o n e : : when all you wish for is another... says:
oh man. there were so many things that gave me confidence this year.
maridan : : I won't waste a single tear : : a l o n e : : when all you wish for is another... says:
it was just like...man.
maridan : : I won't waste a single tear : : a l o n e : : when all you wish for is another... says:
it was crazy.
maridan : : I won't waste a single tear : : a l o n e : : when all you wish for is another... says:
and I feel like high school is going to shatter that...because you're back at the bottom again.
maridan : : I won't waste a single tear : : a l o n e : : when all you wish for is another... says:
it doesn't have to be like that...does it?
brooke says:
thats what i'm thinking. like these things we're worried about, they don't have to change?
brooke says:
its up to us.
brooke says:
if we make the effort to not change them.
maridan : : I won't waste a single tear : : a l o n e : : when all you wish for is another... says:
I remember right after I broke up with Tommy, on the boat, I bumped into you and Jane...and you guys were so nice to me...so so nice. and I just thought that I was gonna die. there were tears streaming down my face and my nose was all red and you two were like, 'you're beautiful. don't worry about it.' and you comforted me and that was just the cherry on top. to have that...what seems like a silly
maridan : : I won't waste a single tear : : a l o n e : : when all you wish for is another... says:
little thing in the grand scheme of life...but it meant so much, even if it took me a while to face the fact that I had made a decision, and that I'm not going back onit.
brooke says:
which was another example of just such a strong thing to do. and i remember that too. but one of the thigns that brings the biggest smile to my face is when i think about the flower you sent me! i had wanted someone to send me one so badly.
maridan : : I won't waste a single tear : : a l o n e : : when all you wish for is another... says:
maridan : : I won't waste a single tear : : a l o n e : : when all you wish for is another... says:
I'm glad.
maridan : : I won't waste a single tear : : a l o n e : : when all you wish for is another... says:
I did a pretty good job of pretending it wasn't me though, huh?
maridan : : I won't waste a single tear : : a l o n e : : when all you wish for is another... says:
brooke says:
YES! ahahha i really didn't know at all.
maridan : : I won't waste a single tear : : a l o n e : : when all you wish for is another... says:
haha
brooke says:
and of course there was the time where the final bell rang and no one moved.
brooke says:
ma
brooke says:
man
maridan : : I won't waste a single tear : : a l o n e : : when all you wish for is another... says:
oh man. I wanted that to be so special for you, because you SO deserved it, 'twas the least I could do.
maridan : : I won't waste a single tear : : a l o n e : : when all you wish for is another... says:
yeah.
brooke says:
i could reminse about cornwallis forever
maridan : : I won't waste a single tear : : a l o n e : : when all you wish for is another... says:
oh wow.
maridan : : I won't waste a single tear : : a l o n e : : when all you wish for is another... says:
definitely.
brooke says:
i dont know if i even got to tell you how much i loved the valedictorian speech
maridan : : I won't waste a single tear : : a l o n e : : when all you wish for is another... says:
I want to feel it all forever.
maridan : : I won't waste a single tear : : a l o n e : : when all you wish for is another... says:
you did?
maridan : : I won't waste a single tear : : a l o n e : : when all you wish for is another... says:
I'm glad.
maridan : : I won't waste a single tear : : a l o n e : : when all you wish for is another... says:
I was in such a flurry, I didn't really even look around. all I remember is that it was loud when I finished, and when I got back, I saw tears in Kostek's eyes.
brooke says:
i'll never forget that because i basically started crying when the cerimony started, and i was sitting next to scott and at one point tears were streaming down my face and he took my hand.
maridan : : I won't waste a single tear : : a l o n e : : when all you wish for is another... says:
ohhhhh.
maridan : : I won't waste a single tear : : a l o n e : : when all you wish for is another... says:
that makes ME cry.
maridan : : I won't waste a single tear : : a l o n e : : when all you wish for is another... says:
oh my GOD.
brooke says:
yeah i know i'll never forget that.
brooke says:
and when you were like
brooke says:
talking about mr petersen!
brooke says:
hahaah
maridan : : I won't waste a single tear : : a l o n e : : when all you wish for is another... says:
hahaha
maridan : : I won't waste a single tear : : a l o n e : : when all you wish for is another... says:
yeah, I hoped you guys would laugh.
brooke says:
oh god.. and when mr hobin gave me my award my heart was in my mouth. i was SO shocked. my jaw dropped. it sounds cheesy but i would NEVER expect that.
maridan : : I won't waste a single tear : : a l o n e : : when all you wish for is another... says:
are you serious?
maridan : : I won't waste a single tear : : a l o n e : : when all you wish for is another... says:
brooke, I was a bitch.
brooke says:
i don't thikn you were at all
brooke says:
honestly.
brooke says:
he was the bitch, thus giving you reasons to break it off.
maridan : : I won't waste a single tear : : a l o n e : : when all you wish for is another... says:
hahaha
brooke says:
its a good point though!
maridan : : I won't waste a single tear : : a l o n e : : when all you wish for is another... says:
yeah, true
maridan : : I won't waste a single tear : : a l o n e : : when all you wish for is another... says:
but he didn't really...do anything wrong.
brooke says:
what exactly was it?
maridan : : I won't waste a single tear : : a l o n e : : when all you wish for is another... says:
I just felt...posessed.
maridan : : I won't waste a single tear : : a l o n e : : when all you wish for is another... says:
like, I belonged to somebody who wasn't me.
maridan : : I won't waste a single tear : : a l o n e : : when all you wish for is another... says:
and I didn't like that at all.
brooke says:
yeah, no wonder. and once you did it you had to experiance being on your own all over again and thats something that i think is soo important.. like being able to be alone. so it was a good thing to learn from.
maridan : : I won't waste a single tear : : a l o n e : : when all you wish for is another... says:
yeah. thanks for bending this the right way for me doll.
brooke says:
no problem m-d, you shuold never have any regrets about that. certain events afterwards proved that you did the right thing.
maridan : : I won't waste a single tear : : a l o n e : : when all you wish for is another... says:
exactly.
brooke says:
it made you a stronger person, and thats incredible because you're already one of if not the strongest person i know. i honestly sound like a groupie or something, damn it but iive thought about it a lot this summer really and i just want you to know how much respect i have for you.. even though i sound like a weird nut ot something haha
maridan : : I won't waste a single tear : : a l o n e : : when all you wish for is another... says:
no regrets
maridan : : I won't waste a single tear : : a l o n e : : when all you wish for is another... says:
brooke. I don't think that you have any idea how much that means to me. wow.
maridan : : I won't waste a single tear : : a l o n e : : when all you wish for is another... says:
I'm going to have to write more....
brooke says:
i'm so glad because i've been wanting to get it out! haha you have no idea how much time i've had to think about everything this summer.. family vacations where basically i sat on the beach for a week. and you would just come into my head. a lot of the time i thought about that day in mr wards little room when we talked about your dad. or the time you me and jeremy were in mrs. petersens room
maridan : : I won't waste a single tear : : a l o n e : : when all you wish for is another... says:
oh I know! I've thought about that SO much too. I just want it all back...I mean, we have to move on but I'm going to miss that so much. It was so....real. Like, we weren't acting or trying to impress anyone. we were just being ourselves. really.
brooke says:
yeah i know, there was absolutely no bullshit. and like we didn't have to talk the whole time. we could just sit.
maridan : : I won't waste a single tear : : a l o n e : : when all you wish for is another... says:
yup.
maridan : : I won't waste a single tear : : a l o n e : : when all you wish for is another... says:
just chill.
maridan : : I won't waste a single tear : : a l o n e : : when all you wish for is another... says:
that....that made my year.
maridan : : I won't waste a single tear : : a l o n e : : when all you wish for is another... says:
that was THE year. everything...grade 9 was the best year of my life.
brooke says:
yeah. me too. easily.
maridan : : I won't waste a single tear : : a l o n e : : when all you wish for is another... says:
I've felt the most emotion in the last 5 months than I have in my whole being.
maridan : : I won't waste a single tear : : a l o n e : : when all you wish for is another... says:
ever.
brooke says:
me too!!!
brooke says:
i think .. i can speak for both of us .. or me i know that i learned a lot about myself this year
brooke says:
or at least
maridan : : I won't waste a single tear : : a l o n e : : when all you wish for is another... says:
definitely.
brooke says:
became more comfortable with me
maridan : : I won't waste a single tear : : a l o n e : : when all you wish for is another... says:
I would agree whole-heartedly.
maridan : : I won't waste a single tear : : a l o n e : : when all you wish for is another... says:
oh yeah.
maridan : : I won't waste a single tear : : a l o n e : : when all you wish for is another... says:
I just...I go back and everything that I felt was so pure and uninhibited.
brooke says:
yeah i know. you know what, who says we have to lose that. i know its going to be hard. but i just dont want to lose myself in high school.
maridan : : I won't waste a single tear : : a l o n e : : when all you wish for is another... says:
oh I know.
maridan : : I won't waste a single tear : : a l o n e : : when all you wish for is another... says:
with the me that I found this year, I'm so worried about loosing her.
maridan : : I won't waste a single tear : : a l o n e : : when all you wish for is another... says:
the person I am can chill with Jeremy and Brooke in Mrs Petersen's room in 3rd period and talk about regular teenage shit, have lunch at neptune and then work at camp in the evenings and rock out till my skull's going to break.
maridan : : I won't waste a single tear : : a l o n e : : when all you wish for is another... says:
I just.
maridan : : I won't waste a single tear : : a l o n e : : when all you wish for is another... says:
I can't let go of that.
maridan : : I won't waste a single tear : : a l o n e : : when all you wish for is another... says:
everl
maridan : : I won't waste a single tear : : a l o n e : : when all you wish for is another... says:
this is me.
maridan : : I won't waste a single tear : : a l o n e : : when all you wish for is another... says:
I can't.
brooke says:
yeh exactly.. and with me its like.. i dont want to lose not being afraid to say what i think, and do my own thing is instead of following
maridan : : I won't waste a single tear : : a l o n e : : when all you wish for is another... says:
exactly.
maridan : : I won't waste a single tear : : a l o n e : : when all you wish for is another... says:
oh man. there were so many things that gave me confidence this year.
maridan : : I won't waste a single tear : : a l o n e : : when all you wish for is another... says:
it was just like...man.
maridan : : I won't waste a single tear : : a l o n e : : when all you wish for is another... says:
it was crazy.
maridan : : I won't waste a single tear : : a l o n e : : when all you wish for is another... says:
and I feel like high school is going to shatter that...because you're back at the bottom again.
maridan : : I won't waste a single tear : : a l o n e : : when all you wish for is another... says:
it doesn't have to be like that...does it?
brooke says:
thats what i'm thinking. like these things we're worried about, they don't have to change?
brooke says:
its up to us.
brooke says:
if we make the effort to not change them.
maridan : : I won't waste a single tear : : a l o n e : : when all you wish for is another... says:
I remember right after I broke up with Tommy, on the boat, I bumped into you and Jane...and you guys were so nice to me...so so nice. and I just thought that I was gonna die. there were tears streaming down my face and my nose was all red and you two were like, 'you're beautiful. don't worry about it.' and you comforted me and that was just the cherry on top. to have that...what seems like a silly
maridan : : I won't waste a single tear : : a l o n e : : when all you wish for is another... says:
little thing in the grand scheme of life...but it meant so much, even if it took me a while to face the fact that I had made a decision, and that I'm not going back onit.
brooke says:
which was another example of just such a strong thing to do. and i remember that too. but one of the thigns that brings the biggest smile to my face is when i think about the flower you sent me! i had wanted someone to send me one so badly.
maridan : : I won't waste a single tear : : a l o n e : : when all you wish for is another... says:
maridan : : I won't waste a single tear : : a l o n e : : when all you wish for is another... says:
I'm glad.
maridan : : I won't waste a single tear : : a l o n e : : when all you wish for is another... says:
I did a pretty good job of pretending it wasn't me though, huh?
maridan : : I won't waste a single tear : : a l o n e : : when all you wish for is another... says:
brooke says:
YES! ahahha i really didn't know at all.
maridan : : I won't waste a single tear : : a l o n e : : when all you wish for is another... says:
haha
brooke says:
and of course there was the time where the final bell rang and no one moved.
brooke says:
ma
brooke says:
man
maridan : : I won't waste a single tear : : a l o n e : : when all you wish for is another... says:
oh man. I wanted that to be so special for you, because you SO deserved it, 'twas the least I could do.
maridan : : I won't waste a single tear : : a l o n e : : when all you wish for is another... says:
yeah.
brooke says:
i could reminse about cornwallis forever
maridan : : I won't waste a single tear : : a l o n e : : when all you wish for is another... says:
oh wow.
maridan : : I won't waste a single tear : : a l o n e : : when all you wish for is another... says:
definitely.
brooke says:
i dont know if i even got to tell you how much i loved the valedictorian speech
maridan : : I won't waste a single tear : : a l o n e : : when all you wish for is another... says:
I want to feel it all forever.
maridan : : I won't waste a single tear : : a l o n e : : when all you wish for is another... says:
you did?
maridan : : I won't waste a single tear : : a l o n e : : when all you wish for is another... says:
I'm glad.
maridan : : I won't waste a single tear : : a l o n e : : when all you wish for is another... says:
I was in such a flurry, I didn't really even look around. all I remember is that it was loud when I finished, and when I got back, I saw tears in Kostek's eyes.
brooke says:
i'll never forget that because i basically started crying when the cerimony started, and i was sitting next to scott and at one point tears were streaming down my face and he took my hand.
maridan : : I won't waste a single tear : : a l o n e : : when all you wish for is another... says:
ohhhhh.
maridan : : I won't waste a single tear : : a l o n e : : when all you wish for is another... says:
that makes ME cry.
maridan : : I won't waste a single tear : : a l o n e : : when all you wish for is another... says:
oh my GOD.
brooke says:
yeah i know i'll never forget that.
brooke says:
and when you were like
brooke says:
talking about mr petersen!
brooke says:
hahaah
maridan : : I won't waste a single tear : : a l o n e : : when all you wish for is another... says:
hahaha
maridan : : I won't waste a single tear : : a l o n e : : when all you wish for is another... says:
yeah, I hoped you guys would laugh.
brooke says:
oh god.. and when mr hobin gave me my award my heart was in my mouth. i was SO shocked. my jaw dropped. it sounds cheesy but i would NEVER expect that.
maridan : : I won't waste a single tear : : a l o n e : : when all you wish for is another... says:
are you serious?
....
maridan : : I won't waste a single tear : : a l o n e : : when all you wish for is another... says:
you and jeremy and I were chilling in Mrs. Petersen's office thing, and either he or you said something about if there were more girls like me and meghan that the school would be so much better....and I was just wondering if you remember that or you could tell me what you guys (and or someone else) meant by that.
brooke says:
what was meant by that was you guys.. are just amazing people. teachers loved you , and you wanted (this is you espeically) to do good things for the school but you were so nice to EVERYONE! i never saw either of you be mean to anyone. and so creative. and interesting. so many people were just.. there to be there. but you guys put your all into everything.
.....
This dream falls cold
wake up in fire
burn it down
down down down
paint it black
black like the night
walk through the house
that we lived in together
furniture broken
broken like you.
gone without
so much as a trace
never again
will I be able to say
how much I loved you
and hated myself
on that last day
on that last day.
I had a dream the other night that he died.
He died in a forest fire, hiking.
Fell and fled, down and away from the flames.
But too slow.
The camera left him and panned to me.
Back in the city, walking through a round house where the prince used to live. All of the funiture was broken. Cushions torn and the legs of the coffee tables reduced to splinters.
Oh my god it was terrible.
I saw all of it, I woke up in tears.
I feel like I killed somebody.
But now I feel different.
Like I'm someone else.
And I don't feel bad anymore.
I feel clean.