Confession of Pain - NCIS (Chapter 13)-THE END
Warnings: mentions of abuse and strong language
Chapter 13
The next morning after breakfast, Tony asked Jack if he could go to the store with him. The look on the old man’s face was priceless.
“Been waiting for you to ask, Boy.” Jack answered affectionately. “Let’s go.” He motioned to Tony and Jethro to follow him. They made their way to the old truck and traveled the short distance to the General Store. While Jethro went directly to the coffee maker, Tony slowly walked around. He relished the look and smell of the old place; it appeared to be straight out of the movies he used to love as a child. He jumped slightly when a hand touched his shoulder. “Come on, kiddo,” Jack began, “gonna put you to work.”
“Work?” Tony whined slightly. “Grandpa…” Tony smiled.
“This is a price gun.” He manipulated the numbers slightly and picked up a can. “See? Run it over this and click and there you have it. $1.05.”
Tony looked at him. “A buck o’ five? You could sell it for more in DC.”
“Probably. You city slickers don’t realize how much prices are inflated sometimes. Anyway,” he handed the apparatus to Tony, “get moving. There’s a whole box to be priced over there.”
Tony stepped back a bit. “I don’t want to screw it up.” At first Jack and Jethro thought he was joking, but the look on the younger man’s face told them otherwise.
“It’s real simple, son.” Jack said encouragingly. “You’ll do fine. This is nothing compared to the incredible work you do keeping people safe everyday.” He watched as Tony blushed slightly and bit his lip. He reached out and took it and quietly went over to the box.
Jack shared a look with his son. Jethro nodded his thanks. He knew he made the right decision coming home. He wanted Tony to get some distance from DC and his evil father and he also wanted him to experience some quiet time with family. Jack was so good with him. He just wanted Tony to understand that he was loved.
*
The three men worked quietly for the next few hours. Tony checked some customers out at the cash register and Jethro had to chuckle at the excitement in his eyes as he interacted with some of the townspeople.
In the early afternoon, two older women walked in. Jethro stood to greet them. He had not seen the Carter sisters in years.
“Well, well.” The older woman started. “Leroy! My, my how you have grown.” She walked up to him and gave him a big hug. “Still handsome, I see. But, Jack,” she turned to the eldest Gibbs, “he is as gray as you!” She laughed as her sister walked up. “Betty! Look it’s Leroy!”
“Yes, Ruthie…I see that!” She rolled her eyes as she walked over to Jethro. “How are you, Leroy?”
Gibbs couldn’t help but smile at the old sisters. “I’m fine, Ma’am.”
“And still so polite!” Ruth responded as she hugged him. “Nothing like your scoundrel of a father!” She said jokingly as she waved at Jack as he went to stand by an amused looking Tony.
Betty gasped slightly and she walked towards the two men. “Jackson Gibbs…is this Anthony?” She went over to them. “How come you did not let us know he was here so we could finally meet him?” She went over to the counter and hugged a slightly surprised Tony. She stepped back and pinched his cheek. “And so handsome!”
“Um, thank you, Ma’am.” Tony said shyly as he took in the scene.
Ruthie joined them. “Jackson talks about you all the time! We are so happy you came to visit.” She gasped and looked at her sister. “They must come to Sunday dinner tonight!”
“Of course!” Her sister agreed. “By the looks of it, we need to fatten you up, young man.” She looked at Tony.
“Sure, that sounds great. Thank you for the invitation.” He replied.
The sisters both clapped with excitement. They grabbed a few things and paid for them, chatting with Tony the entire time. After they left, Tony took a deep breath as he looked at Jethro and Jack.
Jack chuckled. “We call them Hurricane Carters. They are sweet women but kind of overwhelming with their enthusiasm.” He wiped his hands after setting some dusty boxes down. “Should be a good meal. They’re the best cooks in Stillwater.”
Jethro looked at Tony. “If you’re not up for it, it’s okay.”
Tony shook his head. “No, I’m okay. They seem real nice and it sounds like fun.”
Gibbs smiled. “Alright, let’s head back so you can rest and then I can show you around a little more before going to dinner.”
“Okay, Dad.” Tony responded with a big smile as he followed Gibbs out of the store.
*
The two weeks spent in Stillwater were very therapeutic for Tony. He felt grounded and safe for the first time in his life. He knew now that Jethro and Jack were his family and would be forever. He was confident that they would never hurt him or abandon him. And for Tony, to accept that centered and calmed him. He knew he would still have the bad memories of his biological father, but he was not alone anymore. The Gibbs men and his entire team knew his ‘dirty little secret’ and they did not judge him. In fact, they had embraced him even more.
Tony did return to work and his team noticed a change in the Senior agent. He was quieter, although he still cracked jokes and called McGee names. They all thought to themselves how strong Tony had been all those years to hide so much behind his mask. They felt happy that he could be himself around them and they supported him all they could.
*
NINE MONTHS LATER
Dinozzo Senior had plead guilty to most charges. Initially, he tried to plea out of charges of assaulting a federal officer, rape, and incest. He said he would cop to the corruption and fraud if the charges against Tony would be dropped. But luckily, the district attorney had read all of Tony’s statements and those of former workers of his father, and refused to allow a deal. So finally, after months of negotiations with his attorneys, Senior admitted his guilt to all charges. He knew there was no way to deny them. There was too much damning evidence against him to weasel out of his terrible crimes.
After reading the numerous charges levied against him, the judge had sentenced Anthony Dinozzo, Senior to seventy-five years in federal prison. Gibbs was in the courtroom to hear the sentencing. He could not help the smile on his face as he knew this man could not hurt his son anymore. The monster was stopped.
As he watched Senior being led away in shackles, Gibbs turned and left. He wanted to get back to Tony. Jethro had wanted Tony to accompany him, but Tony was not ready to face the man again. He had to reopen his wounds over the last nine months in discussions with prosecutors, but he could not come to the courtroom. Jethro thanked the heavens above that Tony did not have to testify in front of a jury; he is not sure he could of handled that.
As Gibbs returned home, he found Tony napping on the couch. Despite the fact it was a weekday, Vance had given both men the day off; he knew what an important day it was for them.
Jethro smiled at the sleeping figure. His once lonely home had become transformed with the addition of Tony. After returning from Stillwater, Tony let his lease lapse and moved in with Gibbs. They both knew that he would not stay forever; but, for the time being, they were happy with the arrangement. One day when Tony was ready, he’ll move back out on his own. Jethro hoped he could recover fully, meet a nice girl if he wanted to, and make a life for himself.
Gibbs lightly shook Tony’s shoulder. “Hey, bud.” He waited while his son stirred. “Tony.”
His eyes flickered open. He slowly sat up. He looked at his father, but no words could come out; his heart was thundering in his chest. Jethro knew Tony wanted to ask, but was too afraid.
Gibbs placed his arm around his son. “Judge gave him seventy-five years.”
Tony nodded and looked down as his eyes watered. A small sob escaped him as he tried to turn away from his father. Jethro wouldn’t have it. He pulled Tony close to him and allowed his child to cry. They sat there for hours, not exchanging any words.
*
EPILOGUE
A few months later, Tony stood in the kitchen on a Saturday morning. They were off for the weekend and Tony had something important to do. Gibbs was going to spend the day working on his boat.
“What are your plans today, Tony?”
“Just errands and stuff, Dad. I’ll be gone most of the day. Is that okay?”
Gibbs smiled and replied, “Sure. Anything you need me for?”
Tony paused for a moment but then shook his head. “I’m okay.” He grabbed the keys to his Mustang. “I’ll check in later, okay?” He smiled at his father.
“No problem, Tony.”
*
As Tony drove the forty five minutes into Maryland, he had a lot of time to gather his thoughts. He wanted to tell Gibbs what he was doing, but he knew his Dad would have wanted to accompany him. And, if Tony was honest with himself, he would have let him. Gibbs calmed him and took away his fears. But, this was something he had to do alone. And now, after all this time, Tony felt like he could.
As he walked into the maximum security prison, he had to pass through a metal detector. He did flash his federal agent badge and that got him ahead in line. There were scores of people there to see their loved ones. Tony was happy he did not have to get processed with the masses.
A correctional officer led Tony down a corridor, in what appeared to be the administrative wing. He gestured for Tony to take a seat and said, “The Warden will be with you momentarily.”
Tony nodded his thanks and took a seat. After a few minutes, Tony stood to greet the older, stern looking gentleman. “Warden Chase, thank you for meeting me.” He extended his hand.
“Come on, Tony, why so formal?” He smiled as they shook.
Tony laughed. “Okay, Mike. How are you? It’s been a while.”
“Yes. It has been. I’m sure they still miss their best Detective in the Baltimore PD.”
“Well…” He shook his head. Tony had encountered the Warden many times during his tenure in Baltimore. Dinozzo had been responsible for putting many men and women away in this prison.
He took a seat opposite the Warden. “I appreciate the short notice and all.” Tony said quietly.
Mike replied, “It’s no problem, Tony. I know what he’s in for and I’m sorry.”
“Yeah…well…is it possible for a sit down? I don’t know with his level of security, if that might be possible.”
“If his crimes were just related to fraud and such, he wouldn’t be here. It’s his crimes against you that qualified him for max security. The first few months are spent in some isolation and soon, he’ll move to the General Population.”
“Gen Pop?” Tony asked, somewhat surprised. “I figured with the charges against me, he would qualify for the secured unit.” Tony knew that rapists and child molesters were at the bottom of the food chain in prisons. They were not safe. As much as he was glad his father was in prison, he was not sure how he felt about that.
“We take it by a case to case basis, Tony. If it is safer for him to be moved, he will be.” Mike stood. “Shall we? I have him in a small room. There are cameras and recording devices.” The Warden could see the slight relief on Tony’s face, even thought the young agent did not respond. They traversed the gray hallways quietly. As they neared the prisoners, Tony started to become a little nervous. He had not seen Senior in almost one year, since that fateful day in the hotel room. He stopped at the door. He could see through the tiny window, his father sitting with his arms and legs shackled to a chair. He took a deep breath and walked in.
*
When Tony sat, he could see that prison had not been kind to Senior. His normally tanned skin was pale and his face was gaunt. The man had clearly lost at least fifteen pounds. But what did not change was the cold look in his eyes as he gazed upon his son.
“Anthony.” He said in a hissing tone. “I was wondering when you’d get the balls to face me.”
Tony expected to panic as he looked upon the man who almost ruined his life. But, he felt an amount of calm as he stared at him. “I was busy living my life. How have things been for you?” He smiled slightly to see the surprised look on his father’s face at his tone. Senior thought he would see the scared Tony, but this version seemed different, confident. Senior didn’t like it.
“Oh, I love being locked away in this hellhole thanks to an ungrateful brat of a son.”
Tony raised his eyebrow. “I’m sorry, am I supposed to be grateful that you abused and raped me for all these years?” His eyes narrowed and became deadly as he leaned towards his father. “You are the sick asshole that did this to yourself. Not only did you hurt me, but countless people lost their fortunes and retirement savings because of you.”
Senior huffed. “Those people were stupid if they thought they could get returns like that; they are to blame for believing me.”
Tony leaned back and chuckled bitterly. “You are a piece of work. It took me a long time to stop blaming myself for what you did to me. It didn’t matter if I tried to be good, to be perfect, you are broken inside and decided to take it out on a defenseless child. It wasn’t my fault. It was yours.”
Senior laughed. “Therapy must be working.”
“It’s not therapy. It’s being around a family for the first time in my life. I have a father and two grandfathers; two brothers and two sisters. It’s amazing to be around such good people.” Tony paused as he thought of them. “Life did not have to be like this, Father. You made horrible choices and now you will pay for the rest of your miserable life.”
“I’m sure that makes you happy.” He sneered.
“Happy? Maybe. But honestly, all I feel for you is sadness. It may take years for me to completely recover from what you did to me. But, I forgive you. I forgive you because I don’t want to hold on to hate. I want to move on. I want to have a good life. I was given a second chance; a chance to be happy. I get to have Christmas and Thanksgiving with my family. I won’t be lonely or feel the kind of despair I have felt for many years. I am going to move on; look forward.”
Tony could tell his words were having an effect on his father. His face was becoming redder by the minute.
“Like Gibbs is going to want to have a sniveling little brat like you as a son.”
Tony stood and shook his head. “I feel sorry for you.” He paused. “Has anyone come to visit?” He watched as his Father looked away slightly. “All your high-powered friends and multiple ex-wives. I’m sure when they found out what you did, they high tailed it away from you. How does that feel, Father? To know that no one cares that you are here?”
“Shut up, you little shit.” He said as he struggled against his bindings. “You are worthless.”
“No.” He stepped closer to him. “I’m not. It’s taken some time for me to get there. But, I know who I am.” He sighed. “I did not come here expecting an apology and a change of heart. You are who you are and that will never change.” He walked to the door and turned one last to his father. “Your time here will be difficult, Anthony. The Dinozzo name is known in this prison.”
“What?” He responded angrily.
“I locked up a bunch of criminals in my time in Baltimore.” He paused as he met his father’s cold eyes. “And perps here don’t take kindly to pedophiles.” He smiled. “Watch your back.” Tony knocked on the door and was let out. As he walked back towards the exit with the Warden, he could hear Senior shouting obscenities.
*
When Tony stepped outside the gates, his eyes had difficulty adjusting to the bright sun. He placed his sunglasses on and tilted his head up a bit. The warmth of the day washed over him and he felt light and free. As he made his way to his car, he saw a figure leaning against it. He couldn’t help but smile. No words were exchanged between the two for a moment.
“Ducky dropped me off.” Gibbs said with his arms crossed, slight smirk on his face.
“How’d you know? Tony asked.
Gibbs stood straight and placed his hand on Tony’s shoulder. “I know my boy.”
Tony nodded. “Thanks, Dad.”
“I’m always here for you, son.” Jethro said as he hugged him briefly.
As they got their emotions in check, Tony spoke. “Hey, I’m starving!” He said. “There’s a place by my old precinct that has the best deep dish.”
Gibbs slapped the top of the car and went to the driver’s side. “Sounds perfect.”
And the two drove away.
*
The end
Chapter 13
The next morning after breakfast, Tony asked Jack if he could go to the store with him. The look on the old man’s face was priceless.
“Been waiting for you to ask, Boy.” Jack answered affectionately. “Let’s go.” He motioned to Tony and Jethro to follow him. They made their way to the old truck and traveled the short distance to the General Store. While Jethro went directly to the coffee maker, Tony slowly walked around. He relished the look and smell of the old place; it appeared to be straight out of the movies he used to love as a child. He jumped slightly when a hand touched his shoulder. “Come on, kiddo,” Jack began, “gonna put you to work.”
“Work?” Tony whined slightly. “Grandpa…” Tony smiled.
“This is a price gun.” He manipulated the numbers slightly and picked up a can. “See? Run it over this and click and there you have it. $1.05.”
Tony looked at him. “A buck o’ five? You could sell it for more in DC.”
“Probably. You city slickers don’t realize how much prices are inflated sometimes. Anyway,” he handed the apparatus to Tony, “get moving. There’s a whole box to be priced over there.”
Tony stepped back a bit. “I don’t want to screw it up.” At first Jack and Jethro thought he was joking, but the look on the younger man’s face told them otherwise.
“It’s real simple, son.” Jack said encouragingly. “You’ll do fine. This is nothing compared to the incredible work you do keeping people safe everyday.” He watched as Tony blushed slightly and bit his lip. He reached out and took it and quietly went over to the box.
Jack shared a look with his son. Jethro nodded his thanks. He knew he made the right decision coming home. He wanted Tony to get some distance from DC and his evil father and he also wanted him to experience some quiet time with family. Jack was so good with him. He just wanted Tony to understand that he was loved.
*
The three men worked quietly for the next few hours. Tony checked some customers out at the cash register and Jethro had to chuckle at the excitement in his eyes as he interacted with some of the townspeople.
In the early afternoon, two older women walked in. Jethro stood to greet them. He had not seen the Carter sisters in years.
“Well, well.” The older woman started. “Leroy! My, my how you have grown.” She walked up to him and gave him a big hug. “Still handsome, I see. But, Jack,” she turned to the eldest Gibbs, “he is as gray as you!” She laughed as her sister walked up. “Betty! Look it’s Leroy!”
“Yes, Ruthie…I see that!” She rolled her eyes as she walked over to Jethro. “How are you, Leroy?”
Gibbs couldn’t help but smile at the old sisters. “I’m fine, Ma’am.”
“And still so polite!” Ruth responded as she hugged him. “Nothing like your scoundrel of a father!” She said jokingly as she waved at Jack as he went to stand by an amused looking Tony.
Betty gasped slightly and she walked towards the two men. “Jackson Gibbs…is this Anthony?” She went over to them. “How come you did not let us know he was here so we could finally meet him?” She went over to the counter and hugged a slightly surprised Tony. She stepped back and pinched his cheek. “And so handsome!”
“Um, thank you, Ma’am.” Tony said shyly as he took in the scene.
Ruthie joined them. “Jackson talks about you all the time! We are so happy you came to visit.” She gasped and looked at her sister. “They must come to Sunday dinner tonight!”
“Of course!” Her sister agreed. “By the looks of it, we need to fatten you up, young man.” She looked at Tony.
“Sure, that sounds great. Thank you for the invitation.” He replied.
The sisters both clapped with excitement. They grabbed a few things and paid for them, chatting with Tony the entire time. After they left, Tony took a deep breath as he looked at Jethro and Jack.
Jack chuckled. “We call them Hurricane Carters. They are sweet women but kind of overwhelming with their enthusiasm.” He wiped his hands after setting some dusty boxes down. “Should be a good meal. They’re the best cooks in Stillwater.”
Jethro looked at Tony. “If you’re not up for it, it’s okay.”
Tony shook his head. “No, I’m okay. They seem real nice and it sounds like fun.”
Gibbs smiled. “Alright, let’s head back so you can rest and then I can show you around a little more before going to dinner.”
“Okay, Dad.” Tony responded with a big smile as he followed Gibbs out of the store.
*
The two weeks spent in Stillwater were very therapeutic for Tony. He felt grounded and safe for the first time in his life. He knew now that Jethro and Jack were his family and would be forever. He was confident that they would never hurt him or abandon him. And for Tony, to accept that centered and calmed him. He knew he would still have the bad memories of his biological father, but he was not alone anymore. The Gibbs men and his entire team knew his ‘dirty little secret’ and they did not judge him. In fact, they had embraced him even more.
Tony did return to work and his team noticed a change in the Senior agent. He was quieter, although he still cracked jokes and called McGee names. They all thought to themselves how strong Tony had been all those years to hide so much behind his mask. They felt happy that he could be himself around them and they supported him all they could.
*
NINE MONTHS LATER
Dinozzo Senior had plead guilty to most charges. Initially, he tried to plea out of charges of assaulting a federal officer, rape, and incest. He said he would cop to the corruption and fraud if the charges against Tony would be dropped. But luckily, the district attorney had read all of Tony’s statements and those of former workers of his father, and refused to allow a deal. So finally, after months of negotiations with his attorneys, Senior admitted his guilt to all charges. He knew there was no way to deny them. There was too much damning evidence against him to weasel out of his terrible crimes.
After reading the numerous charges levied against him, the judge had sentenced Anthony Dinozzo, Senior to seventy-five years in federal prison. Gibbs was in the courtroom to hear the sentencing. He could not help the smile on his face as he knew this man could not hurt his son anymore. The monster was stopped.
As he watched Senior being led away in shackles, Gibbs turned and left. He wanted to get back to Tony. Jethro had wanted Tony to accompany him, but Tony was not ready to face the man again. He had to reopen his wounds over the last nine months in discussions with prosecutors, but he could not come to the courtroom. Jethro thanked the heavens above that Tony did not have to testify in front of a jury; he is not sure he could of handled that.
As Gibbs returned home, he found Tony napping on the couch. Despite the fact it was a weekday, Vance had given both men the day off; he knew what an important day it was for them.
Jethro smiled at the sleeping figure. His once lonely home had become transformed with the addition of Tony. After returning from Stillwater, Tony let his lease lapse and moved in with Gibbs. They both knew that he would not stay forever; but, for the time being, they were happy with the arrangement. One day when Tony was ready, he’ll move back out on his own. Jethro hoped he could recover fully, meet a nice girl if he wanted to, and make a life for himself.
Gibbs lightly shook Tony’s shoulder. “Hey, bud.” He waited while his son stirred. “Tony.”
His eyes flickered open. He slowly sat up. He looked at his father, but no words could come out; his heart was thundering in his chest. Jethro knew Tony wanted to ask, but was too afraid.
Gibbs placed his arm around his son. “Judge gave him seventy-five years.”
Tony nodded and looked down as his eyes watered. A small sob escaped him as he tried to turn away from his father. Jethro wouldn’t have it. He pulled Tony close to him and allowed his child to cry. They sat there for hours, not exchanging any words.
*
EPILOGUE
A few months later, Tony stood in the kitchen on a Saturday morning. They were off for the weekend and Tony had something important to do. Gibbs was going to spend the day working on his boat.
“What are your plans today, Tony?”
“Just errands and stuff, Dad. I’ll be gone most of the day. Is that okay?”
Gibbs smiled and replied, “Sure. Anything you need me for?”
Tony paused for a moment but then shook his head. “I’m okay.” He grabbed the keys to his Mustang. “I’ll check in later, okay?” He smiled at his father.
“No problem, Tony.”
*
As Tony drove the forty five minutes into Maryland, he had a lot of time to gather his thoughts. He wanted to tell Gibbs what he was doing, but he knew his Dad would have wanted to accompany him. And, if Tony was honest with himself, he would have let him. Gibbs calmed him and took away his fears. But, this was something he had to do alone. And now, after all this time, Tony felt like he could.
As he walked into the maximum security prison, he had to pass through a metal detector. He did flash his federal agent badge and that got him ahead in line. There were scores of people there to see their loved ones. Tony was happy he did not have to get processed with the masses.
A correctional officer led Tony down a corridor, in what appeared to be the administrative wing. He gestured for Tony to take a seat and said, “The Warden will be with you momentarily.”
Tony nodded his thanks and took a seat. After a few minutes, Tony stood to greet the older, stern looking gentleman. “Warden Chase, thank you for meeting me.” He extended his hand.
“Come on, Tony, why so formal?” He smiled as they shook.
Tony laughed. “Okay, Mike. How are you? It’s been a while.”
“Yes. It has been. I’m sure they still miss their best Detective in the Baltimore PD.”
“Well…” He shook his head. Tony had encountered the Warden many times during his tenure in Baltimore. Dinozzo had been responsible for putting many men and women away in this prison.
He took a seat opposite the Warden. “I appreciate the short notice and all.” Tony said quietly.
Mike replied, “It’s no problem, Tony. I know what he’s in for and I’m sorry.”
“Yeah…well…is it possible for a sit down? I don’t know with his level of security, if that might be possible.”
“If his crimes were just related to fraud and such, he wouldn’t be here. It’s his crimes against you that qualified him for max security. The first few months are spent in some isolation and soon, he’ll move to the General Population.”
“Gen Pop?” Tony asked, somewhat surprised. “I figured with the charges against me, he would qualify for the secured unit.” Tony knew that rapists and child molesters were at the bottom of the food chain in prisons. They were not safe. As much as he was glad his father was in prison, he was not sure how he felt about that.
“We take it by a case to case basis, Tony. If it is safer for him to be moved, he will be.” Mike stood. “Shall we? I have him in a small room. There are cameras and recording devices.” The Warden could see the slight relief on Tony’s face, even thought the young agent did not respond. They traversed the gray hallways quietly. As they neared the prisoners, Tony started to become a little nervous. He had not seen Senior in almost one year, since that fateful day in the hotel room. He stopped at the door. He could see through the tiny window, his father sitting with his arms and legs shackled to a chair. He took a deep breath and walked in.
*
When Tony sat, he could see that prison had not been kind to Senior. His normally tanned skin was pale and his face was gaunt. The man had clearly lost at least fifteen pounds. But what did not change was the cold look in his eyes as he gazed upon his son.
“Anthony.” He said in a hissing tone. “I was wondering when you’d get the balls to face me.”
Tony expected to panic as he looked upon the man who almost ruined his life. But, he felt an amount of calm as he stared at him. “I was busy living my life. How have things been for you?” He smiled slightly to see the surprised look on his father’s face at his tone. Senior thought he would see the scared Tony, but this version seemed different, confident. Senior didn’t like it.
“Oh, I love being locked away in this hellhole thanks to an ungrateful brat of a son.”
Tony raised his eyebrow. “I’m sorry, am I supposed to be grateful that you abused and raped me for all these years?” His eyes narrowed and became deadly as he leaned towards his father. “You are the sick asshole that did this to yourself. Not only did you hurt me, but countless people lost their fortunes and retirement savings because of you.”
Senior huffed. “Those people were stupid if they thought they could get returns like that; they are to blame for believing me.”
Tony leaned back and chuckled bitterly. “You are a piece of work. It took me a long time to stop blaming myself for what you did to me. It didn’t matter if I tried to be good, to be perfect, you are broken inside and decided to take it out on a defenseless child. It wasn’t my fault. It was yours.”
Senior laughed. “Therapy must be working.”
“It’s not therapy. It’s being around a family for the first time in my life. I have a father and two grandfathers; two brothers and two sisters. It’s amazing to be around such good people.” Tony paused as he thought of them. “Life did not have to be like this, Father. You made horrible choices and now you will pay for the rest of your miserable life.”
“I’m sure that makes you happy.” He sneered.
“Happy? Maybe. But honestly, all I feel for you is sadness. It may take years for me to completely recover from what you did to me. But, I forgive you. I forgive you because I don’t want to hold on to hate. I want to move on. I want to have a good life. I was given a second chance; a chance to be happy. I get to have Christmas and Thanksgiving with my family. I won’t be lonely or feel the kind of despair I have felt for many years. I am going to move on; look forward.”
Tony could tell his words were having an effect on his father. His face was becoming redder by the minute.
“Like Gibbs is going to want to have a sniveling little brat like you as a son.”
Tony stood and shook his head. “I feel sorry for you.” He paused. “Has anyone come to visit?” He watched as his Father looked away slightly. “All your high-powered friends and multiple ex-wives. I’m sure when they found out what you did, they high tailed it away from you. How does that feel, Father? To know that no one cares that you are here?”
“Shut up, you little shit.” He said as he struggled against his bindings. “You are worthless.”
“No.” He stepped closer to him. “I’m not. It’s taken some time for me to get there. But, I know who I am.” He sighed. “I did not come here expecting an apology and a change of heart. You are who you are and that will never change.” He walked to the door and turned one last to his father. “Your time here will be difficult, Anthony. The Dinozzo name is known in this prison.”
“What?” He responded angrily.
“I locked up a bunch of criminals in my time in Baltimore.” He paused as he met his father’s cold eyes. “And perps here don’t take kindly to pedophiles.” He smiled. “Watch your back.” Tony knocked on the door and was let out. As he walked back towards the exit with the Warden, he could hear Senior shouting obscenities.
*
When Tony stepped outside the gates, his eyes had difficulty adjusting to the bright sun. He placed his sunglasses on and tilted his head up a bit. The warmth of the day washed over him and he felt light and free. As he made his way to his car, he saw a figure leaning against it. He couldn’t help but smile. No words were exchanged between the two for a moment.
“Ducky dropped me off.” Gibbs said with his arms crossed, slight smirk on his face.
“How’d you know? Tony asked.
Gibbs stood straight and placed his hand on Tony’s shoulder. “I know my boy.”
Tony nodded. “Thanks, Dad.”
“I’m always here for you, son.” Jethro said as he hugged him briefly.
As they got their emotions in check, Tony spoke. “Hey, I’m starving!” He said. “There’s a place by my old precinct that has the best deep dish.”
Gibbs slapped the top of the car and went to the driver’s side. “Sounds perfect.”
And the two drove away.
*
The end