Episode Recap and Discussion - 1x09 - Good Cop, Dead Cop
This episode was full of SO MUCH yummy subtext. SO MUCH!
- The episode starts with that Bosco dude running after some guy and trying to get information out of him by planting drugs on him. So... dirty cop. And apparently he has ratted on his fellow dirty cops to the FBI and his partner shoots him in the back, then Bosco/Eps totally kills that mofo. And there was a lot of cheesy slow motion graphics which... was a running theme in this ep, unfortunately. But who cares about all this?
- MARSHALL IS HELPING MARY MOVE INTO HER NEW HOUSE! Which is actually her current house, but 13 months ago it was new. And Marshall is reading the paper and he and Mary are having some exceptionally adorable banter, and then...
Mary asks him where the washer/dryer guy is and Marshall gets all shifty-eyed.
"Gone. He finished."
Checking to see if she bought that. His little shifty-eyedness suggests that in actuality he sent the guy away, probably because said guy was macking on his Mary and Marshall didn't like that one bit. Already we get this certain territorial feel from Marshall that seems to be missing in present day.
He gets excited when she mentions the 3 bedrooms.
I gots a bullet room now, dawg!
Then Marshall excitedly points out to Mary that he bought her coffee and a bagel. This moment was so incredibly adorable, and so incredibly tiny that I have no idea why I love it so much, but I do. I think it's because Marshall reminded me of a little kid bringing his teacher an apple or something, and he was looking so forward to relishing in her approval, but instead Mary tells him that he sucks, because apparently she's on a diet of icky green juice mix. "I'm trying to do something healthy for a change." This disturbs Marshall, because he loves Mary just the way she is and he can't understand why she wants to change herself. Mary mentions being 35-ish and having no boyfriend and wanting more out of her life, and Marshall is still baffled.
NO! DON'T CHANGE, MARY! I LOVE YOU! I'LL BE YOUR BOYFRIEND! ME!!! PICK ME! LOOK AT HOW I'M ALL SMOLDERING WHILE I GAZE AT YOU!
And then Mary's mom shows up, and this is the first time that Marshall's meeting her. And Mary tries to hide, but...
Marshall gives her away. He loves her, but he also loves to torture her.
Yeah, that's usually the face I make every time Jinx appears on the screen, too. She's growing on me though. Slowly but surely.
- Mary and Marshall are briefing Eps.
Mmm, sex eyes. Wait... I mean... hey, you stop giving her the sex eyes, you hear me Eps? Feel free to give me the sex eyes though. Even though you're a complete tool.
Notice how both Marshall and Eps are checking Mary out.
Marshall ain't too happy about other people's eyes on Mary's ass. Not happy at all.
Step off my woman, biatch!
Then Eps makes a comment about, "You have a partner that looks like that and you still get pissy when other guys look at her?"
*Blush splutter blush blush*
Let's all take a moment to enjoy the lusty looks among men. They so want to make out right now. Oh, and Eps says something like, "Maybe you're the one who shouldn't be thinking what you're thinking." Referring to smutty Mary thoughts, not the manlove. But you know they wanted to make out. Anyway, Marshall is thrown off for a moment, because Eps is completely right.
Then Mary comes in, the one that he's been having smutty thoughts about for who knows how long, and for one second he is completely vulnerable, his eyes are looking at her with so much love and disparity. Disparity because he knows that Eps is right. She's off limits to him. :'(
But then he quickly masks his feelings and comes up with some lame excuse as to why he can't go with Mary and Eps to the motel.
Now, because of this scene, and Mary's earlier comment about her wanting more, it got my mind to thinking that maybe at this point in time Marshall had been entertaining the thought of taking their relationship to the next level. I'm sure it's just me reading too far into things, but his possessiveness of her with Eps, and earlier with the washer/dryer guy, leads me to believe that he saw a future with her here, a certain glimmer of hope that has now turned into perpetual unrequited love. The Marshall from Trojan Horst seems to have accepted the idea that Mary will never love him in the same way that he loves her, whereas this Marshall had to be reminded that he couldn't have her. Mary and Marshall are often in their own little world where only they exist and they see only what they want to see, but then these outside forces (Eps, Raph, Brandi, etc) really make them re-evaluate themselves. Poor Marshall. :'( NEVER GIVE UP HOPE!
- Eps and Mary in the motel. Blah blah nobody cares let's get back to Marshall.
- Mary is fretting over her mother not going away. Much like we all do just about every week.
Marshall looks at her adoringly. Because that's what he does best. Also, he's slowly putting on his jacket and driving most of the women in the audience wild. Especially
fatherleary.
Now Mary's the one having smutty thoughts.
- Eps calls Mary and sets up a lameass way of trying to get into her pants. And Mary is resistant all the way. Until he tells his lameass sob story. "I planted evidence and ratted out my friends and everyone hates me boohoohoo I'm admitting to you that I'm a dirty cop but I did it for good reasons but I still ratted out my friends because I'm too much of a coward to stand up for what I believe in did I mention that I illegally planted evidence? I totally want to do you and tell my friends about it, but they all hate me, because I ratted them out. Boohoohoo." And then Mary is all, "OH MY GOD! DO ME! DO ME NOW YOU DIRTY COP YOU! I know you're an asshole, but you're hot, so it's all good." Then more cheesy slow-mo scenes commence, but this time instead of slow-mo running, it's slow-mo frenching. ICK! But Eps is hot, so... can't complain too much. But it gave the show a very low-budget porno feel. All it needed was this guy:
- Time jump to present day. Mary tries to be understanding towards Brandi, tells her she can hang out with Raph, and sets up some sister bonding time. Awwwwwwwwww.
- A cop from Chicago is killed, and naturally everyone at WITSEC suspects Eps, but Mary defends him (even though she too suspects him).
Mmm, sexy glaring and a bitter Marshall. He hates Eps SO HARD! He really wants it to be Eps purely so he can say, "Told you so." I really wish we had gotten to see Marshall's initial reaction to Mary sleeping with Eps, because it's clear here that he knows. I bet he died a little inside. I would have. Eps is such a tool, blech. But he's a hot tool, so I can't really blame Mary. But Marshall! Oh, poor Marshall. Anyway, he says another snide remark about Eps, which elicits this:
And Stan saying, "Alright, that's enough you two!" I swear he's going to have to put them in timeout one of these days.
- Gratuitous Raph being shirtless and sweaty scene. Notice that he's working out in his own home, yet he has a gym bag full of sweaty gym clothes and empty condom wrappers. Hmm... Anyway, Brandi is adorable and I love her. I can't believe that I ever used to hate her, she's awesome. Also, this must be documented:
Bwahahahahahahaha. I love that she doesn't slap him when she finds out that he's cheated on Mary, but she slaps him after he says that he didn't think Judy was fat. Hee. I love Brandi.
- Mary gets attacked by the dead cop's irate partner when she goes to the police station to talk to Dershowitz, and she says, "If it were my partner I'd be doing the same thing..." Damn right! Although I think Mary would go straight to using her gun... or throwing soap at crotches. Anyway, Dersh is a total douche in this episode. So, as
fatherleary dubbed him in her Marshall picspam, he will now be known as Douchewitz (usually I love him, but... he just turned me off in this ep).
More slashy undertones for you. Bwahahahaha. So, Mary finally gets a hold of Eps and he's just as toolish as he was 13 months ago, and Mary is still turned on by his toolishness. Ick. He claims complete innocence, natch.
Marshall warns Mary about Douchewitz coming to arrest Eps. He's conflicted, because he's like, "Hells yeah! That scum deserves to be in jail." But at the same time he's like, "Awww, this is going to be difficult for Mary. When she hurts, I hurt, because our hearts are forever connected. Bah, I'm not this sentimental. What kind of drivel are you making me internally speak, firthgal? Psh. Next you'll have me singing that crappy song from The Titanic."
*gag*
- Some important/subtexty commentary from Eps: "Worse law enforcement idea in the last hundred years, male/female partners. Did you know, that 9 times out of 10, they end up screwin' or killin' each other? Or both?" and he gives a pointed look at Marshall. He could have been looking at Douchewitz, but I prefer to think that he was looking at Marshall, because he knows that Marshall wants to screw Mary. But oh, Marshall wants to do SO MUCH MORE than that, Eps. So much more.
Sorry guys, Marshall is in a singing kind of mood today.
- Douchewitz is a douche, and Marshall feels Mary's pain, so he's right there beside her, offering his help.
"Hey, so where do you want to start?"
"This morning you wanted to fry Eps, now you want to help him?"
"No, I want to help you." (he leans in as he says this to her, by the way)
"Oh... thanks."
- Brandi, gym bag, empty condom wrapper, Fat Judy... it creates a lot of Mary/Brandi/Raph/Jinx angst.
- Mary has a catfight with the irate police lady from earlier at the dead guy's wake.
Marshall enjoys watching the news footage of said catfight over and over and over and over and over again. The smutty thoughts are out of control.
- Mary makes nice with irate police lady in the most adorable way possible.
- Marshall goes to a gay bar. Which explains the earlier manlust he was having for Eps.
He's feeling very confused right now.
So he asks "Mar" out for drinks to get back in touch with his hetero side. I have a feeling this is the closest we'll ever get to him actually asking her out on a date. *sigh*
ASDFJKLHGFSDFSDFAADSF SITTING IN CLOSE PROXIMITY!!!!!!!! So very, very hot. Anyway, they figure out that dead guy was gay, which now makes the wife a suspect. GASP! SHOCK! AWE! <-- Yes, my friends, that was the return of sarcapslock.
Mary accidentally makes a racist joke to Bobby D, and suddenly he stops being douchey and goes back to being the Dershowitz that I like.
ASDJK;L;DSFJHSDFJKHSDLK;LSDK CLOSE PROXIMITY!!!! AGAIN! AND HOTNESS! Oh, the hotness. They look like they're posing for a family photo in GQ or something. Why they would put a family photo in GQ is beyond me, but that's beside the point. Just pop in some brown and blond haired kids and all our dreams have come true.
Anyway, Mary gets a confession out of the wife. GASP! SHOCK! AWE!
- Raph breaks Brandi's heart. :'( And she goes back to her drug dealing boyfriend.
Check it out. Marshall is still jealous of Eps, even from 10 feet away.
In conclusion, the heart wants what it wants, and Marshall's wants Mary's, Brandi's wants Raph's, Raph's wants Mary's, Mary's wants to do Eps again, and... Marshall is still dreaming of his and Mary's wedding day. It's a small ceremony, just close family. His father is his best man, and he looks on proudly as Marshall leans down to kiss his bride. *dreamy sigh*
- The episode starts with that Bosco dude running after some guy and trying to get information out of him by planting drugs on him. So... dirty cop. And apparently he has ratted on his fellow dirty cops to the FBI and his partner shoots him in the back, then Bosco/Eps totally kills that mofo. And there was a lot of cheesy slow motion graphics which... was a running theme in this ep, unfortunately. But who cares about all this?
- MARSHALL IS HELPING MARY MOVE INTO HER NEW HOUSE! Which is actually her current house, but 13 months ago it was new. And Marshall is reading the paper and he and Mary are having some exceptionally adorable banter, and then...
Mary asks him where the washer/dryer guy is and Marshall gets all shifty-eyed.
"Gone. He finished."
Checking to see if she bought that. His little shifty-eyedness suggests that in actuality he sent the guy away, probably because said guy was macking on his Mary and Marshall didn't like that one bit. Already we get this certain territorial feel from Marshall that seems to be missing in present day.
He gets excited when she mentions the 3 bedrooms.
I gots a bullet room now, dawg!
Then Marshall excitedly points out to Mary that he bought her coffee and a bagel. This moment was so incredibly adorable, and so incredibly tiny that I have no idea why I love it so much, but I do. I think it's because Marshall reminded me of a little kid bringing his teacher an apple or something, and he was looking so forward to relishing in her approval, but instead Mary tells him that he sucks, because apparently she's on a diet of icky green juice mix. "I'm trying to do something healthy for a change." This disturbs Marshall, because he loves Mary just the way she is and he can't understand why she wants to change herself. Mary mentions being 35-ish and having no boyfriend and wanting more out of her life, and Marshall is still baffled.
NO! DON'T CHANGE, MARY! I LOVE YOU! I'LL BE YOUR BOYFRIEND! ME!!! PICK ME! LOOK AT HOW I'M ALL SMOLDERING WHILE I GAZE AT YOU!
And then Mary's mom shows up, and this is the first time that Marshall's meeting her. And Mary tries to hide, but...
Marshall gives her away. He loves her, but he also loves to torture her.
Yeah, that's usually the face I make every time Jinx appears on the screen, too. She's growing on me though. Slowly but surely.
- Mary and Marshall are briefing Eps.
Mmm, sex eyes. Wait... I mean... hey, you stop giving her the sex eyes, you hear me Eps? Feel free to give me the sex eyes though. Even though you're a complete tool.
Notice how both Marshall and Eps are checking Mary out.
Marshall ain't too happy about other people's eyes on Mary's ass. Not happy at all.
Step off my woman, biatch!
Then Eps makes a comment about, "You have a partner that looks like that and you still get pissy when other guys look at her?"
*Blush splutter blush blush*
Let's all take a moment to enjoy the lusty looks among men. They so want to make out right now. Oh, and Eps says something like, "Maybe you're the one who shouldn't be thinking what you're thinking." Referring to smutty Mary thoughts, not the manlove. But you know they wanted to make out. Anyway, Marshall is thrown off for a moment, because Eps is completely right.
Then Mary comes in, the one that he's been having smutty thoughts about for who knows how long, and for one second he is completely vulnerable, his eyes are looking at her with so much love and disparity. Disparity because he knows that Eps is right. She's off limits to him. :'(
But then he quickly masks his feelings and comes up with some lame excuse as to why he can't go with Mary and Eps to the motel.
Now, because of this scene, and Mary's earlier comment about her wanting more, it got my mind to thinking that maybe at this point in time Marshall had been entertaining the thought of taking their relationship to the next level. I'm sure it's just me reading too far into things, but his possessiveness of her with Eps, and earlier with the washer/dryer guy, leads me to believe that he saw a future with her here, a certain glimmer of hope that has now turned into perpetual unrequited love. The Marshall from Trojan Horst seems to have accepted the idea that Mary will never love him in the same way that he loves her, whereas this Marshall had to be reminded that he couldn't have her. Mary and Marshall are often in their own little world where only they exist and they see only what they want to see, but then these outside forces (Eps, Raph, Brandi, etc) really make them re-evaluate themselves. Poor Marshall. :'( NEVER GIVE UP HOPE!
- Eps and Mary in the motel. Blah blah nobody cares let's get back to Marshall.
- Mary is fretting over her mother not going away. Much like we all do just about every week.
Marshall looks at her adoringly. Because that's what he does best. Also, he's slowly putting on his jacket and driving most of the women in the audience wild. Especially
fatherleary.
Now Mary's the one having smutty thoughts.
- Eps calls Mary and sets up a lameass way of trying to get into her pants. And Mary is resistant all the way. Until he tells his lameass sob story. "I planted evidence and ratted out my friends and everyone hates me boohoohoo I'm admitting to you that I'm a dirty cop but I did it for good reasons but I still ratted out my friends because I'm too much of a coward to stand up for what I believe in did I mention that I illegally planted evidence? I totally want to do you and tell my friends about it, but they all hate me, because I ratted them out. Boohoohoo." And then Mary is all, "OH MY GOD! DO ME! DO ME NOW YOU DIRTY COP YOU! I know you're an asshole, but you're hot, so it's all good." Then more cheesy slow-mo scenes commence, but this time instead of slow-mo running, it's slow-mo frenching. ICK! But Eps is hot, so... can't complain too much. But it gave the show a very low-budget porno feel. All it needed was this guy:
- Time jump to present day. Mary tries to be understanding towards Brandi, tells her she can hang out with Raph, and sets up some sister bonding time. Awwwwwwwwww.
- A cop from Chicago is killed, and naturally everyone at WITSEC suspects Eps, but Mary defends him (even though she too suspects him).
Mmm, sexy glaring and a bitter Marshall. He hates Eps SO HARD! He really wants it to be Eps purely so he can say, "Told you so." I really wish we had gotten to see Marshall's initial reaction to Mary sleeping with Eps, because it's clear here that he knows. I bet he died a little inside. I would have. Eps is such a tool, blech. But he's a hot tool, so I can't really blame Mary. But Marshall! Oh, poor Marshall. Anyway, he says another snide remark about Eps, which elicits this:
And Stan saying, "Alright, that's enough you two!" I swear he's going to have to put them in timeout one of these days.
- Gratuitous Raph being shirtless and sweaty scene. Notice that he's working out in his own home, yet he has a gym bag full of sweaty gym clothes and empty condom wrappers. Hmm... Anyway, Brandi is adorable and I love her. I can't believe that I ever used to hate her, she's awesome. Also, this must be documented:
Bwahahahahahahaha. I love that she doesn't slap him when she finds out that he's cheated on Mary, but she slaps him after he says that he didn't think Judy was fat. Hee. I love Brandi.
- Mary gets attacked by the dead cop's irate partner when she goes to the police station to talk to Dershowitz, and she says, "If it were my partner I'd be doing the same thing..." Damn right! Although I think Mary would go straight to using her gun... or throwing soap at crotches. Anyway, Dersh is a total douche in this episode. So, as
fatherleary dubbed him in her Marshall picspam, he will now be known as Douchewitz (usually I love him, but... he just turned me off in this ep).
More slashy undertones for you. Bwahahahaha. So, Mary finally gets a hold of Eps and he's just as toolish as he was 13 months ago, and Mary is still turned on by his toolishness. Ick. He claims complete innocence, natch.
Marshall warns Mary about Douchewitz coming to arrest Eps. He's conflicted, because he's like, "Hells yeah! That scum deserves to be in jail." But at the same time he's like, "Awww, this is going to be difficult for Mary. When she hurts, I hurt, because our hearts are forever connected. Bah, I'm not this sentimental. What kind of drivel are you making me internally speak, firthgal? Psh. Next you'll have me singing that crappy song from The Titanic."
*gag*
- Some important/subtexty commentary from Eps: "Worse law enforcement idea in the last hundred years, male/female partners. Did you know, that 9 times out of 10, they end up screwin' or killin' each other? Or both?" and he gives a pointed look at Marshall. He could have been looking at Douchewitz, but I prefer to think that he was looking at Marshall, because he knows that Marshall wants to screw Mary. But oh, Marshall wants to do SO MUCH MORE than that, Eps. So much more.
Sorry guys, Marshall is in a singing kind of mood today.
- Douchewitz is a douche, and Marshall feels Mary's pain, so he's right there beside her, offering his help.
"Hey, so where do you want to start?"
"This morning you wanted to fry Eps, now you want to help him?"
"No, I want to help you." (he leans in as he says this to her, by the way)
"Oh... thanks."
- Brandi, gym bag, empty condom wrapper, Fat Judy... it creates a lot of Mary/Brandi/Raph/Jinx angst.
- Mary has a catfight with the irate police lady from earlier at the dead guy's wake.
Marshall enjoys watching the news footage of said catfight over and over and over and over and over again. The smutty thoughts are out of control.
- Mary makes nice with irate police lady in the most adorable way possible.
- Marshall goes to a gay bar. Which explains the earlier manlust he was having for Eps.
He's feeling very confused right now.
So he asks "Mar" out for drinks to get back in touch with his hetero side. I have a feeling this is the closest we'll ever get to him actually asking her out on a date. *sigh*
ASDFJKLHGFSDFSDFAADSF SITTING IN CLOSE PROXIMITY!!!!!!!! So very, very hot. Anyway, they figure out that dead guy was gay, which now makes the wife a suspect. GASP! SHOCK! AWE! <-- Yes, my friends, that was the return of sarcapslock.
Mary accidentally makes a racist joke to Bobby D, and suddenly he stops being douchey and goes back to being the Dershowitz that I like.
ASDJK;L;DSFJHSDFJKHSDLK;LSDK CLOSE PROXIMITY!!!! AGAIN! AND HOTNESS! Oh, the hotness. They look like they're posing for a family photo in GQ or something. Why they would put a family photo in GQ is beyond me, but that's beside the point. Just pop in some brown and blond haired kids and all our dreams have come true.
Anyway, Mary gets a confession out of the wife. GASP! SHOCK! AWE!
- Raph breaks Brandi's heart. :'( And she goes back to her drug dealing boyfriend.
Check it out. Marshall is still jealous of Eps, even from 10 feet away.
In conclusion, the heart wants what it wants, and Marshall's wants Mary's, Brandi's wants Raph's, Raph's wants Mary's, Mary's wants to do Eps again, and... Marshall is still dreaming of his and Mary's wedding day. It's a small ceremony, just close family. His father is his best man, and he looks on proudly as Marshall leans down to kiss his bride. *dreamy sigh*