Episode Recap and Discussion - 1x11 - Stan By Me
OMG OMG OMG OMG OMG OMG OMG!!!!!! That was pretty much my reaction to this episode. Absofreakinglutely amazing.
- The episode starts out in present time and we finally see Brandi's infamous boyfriend Chuck. In his bathrobe. And he's scuzzy. And reeks of slimeball. You can tell he's a guy who usually talks his way out of everything, which is exactly what he did when the FBI showed up. But then Spanky shows up.
And Chuck craps his pants when Spanky and company kill the FBI agents.
Why so SERIOUS?
Honestly, the resemblance is uncanny. Spanky is totally The Joker, only he has a beard instead of scars. "You wanna know how I got this beard? My dad stole my razor. The bastard." So now we have a tale of an unstoppable force called Spanky, and a jackass named Chuck. And Spanky kidnaps Chuck so that he'll tell him where Brandi is.
- Mary comes to the realization that her family will be the death of her, and she so conveniently comes to this conclusion just in time for some prime foreshadowing. And Mary notices two jerkwads following her and writes down their license plate number.
- Mary's mom is a prostitute.
And do you know who the first person is that Mary calls to spew this news to? DO YOU KNOW?
And he's totally squeeing on the inside, because you only call your one true love with that kind of news. Seriously. And all he can think about is when she's coming into work, because he misses her and feels weird when she's not there and he gets this little thrill shooting through his stomach whenever she walks by and he catches a whiff of her shampoo, and she makes him excited to go to work every day. It's true. I'm not making this up, people.
Okay, fine. Maybe I am. Jeez, Mary, you really know how to rain on my parade. What's that? Your mother's dressed like a hooker?
Doesn't she always kinda... dress like a...
- So, Mary walks in on Jinx auditioning for that play from a couple episodes ago.
And Jinx is horrified in the most over the top way possible:
And she goes off on Mary with an insane rant about how she ruins everything good for her and Brandi and how Mary's only happy when they're failing she's being very dramatic and nasty about it all.
Bitch, you crazy.
But of course, Mary is hurt, because her own mother just told her that she's a cruel cruel person who doesn't deserve to live.
And all Mary ever tries to do is make them happy and she loves them despite their complete idiocy, but Mary's self esteem is low enough that she'll believe Jinx. Mary might be a strong, confident woman when it comes to dealing with the scum of the earth, but when it comes to dealing with her insane family and relationship woes, she is so lost and confused and completely fragile, and my heart hurts for her. :'( And of course there had to be a big fallout scene because Mary was about to be kidnapped and this makes it more dramatic.
Hello, I'm Special Agent Asswipe, I'm in this episode purely to make everyone's life a living hell. I'm worse than Spanky. That's right. Hey, can I be Harvey Dent in this scenerio?
No.
Why not?
Because you were never Albuquerque's white knight. Asswipe.
- Then the two jerkwads from earlier attack Mary from behind as she's talking to Asswipe, and she kicks one guy in the nuts and she uses her patented head butt move on the other guy, but he had gotten her with a rag of that stuff that makes you pass out. So she would have gotten away had it not been for that. And Asswipe? He's on the phone the entire time and is acting all affronted that she isn't answering him, despite hearing a scuffle in the background. And a homeless guy sees the whole thing and is super calm about it.
- Brandi and Raph continue to prove that they are a better match than Raph/Mary, but we also see how much they both really do love and care about Mary. And for some reason the show felt a need to show some gratuitous Raph butt.
Why do they not do that for Marshall? Hmm? Oh, and Brandi punches Raph, much in the same way that Mary likes to punch Marshall. A punch from the Shannon women obviously means, "I loooooooove you."
Also, Asswipe calls Brandi's phone and tracks her location.
- Dershowitz is back.
And he's back to being his awesome self. Especially when he figures out that Mary was kidnapped.
- Marshall sees that two FBI agents were killed in North Vale, NJ, and he automatically worries on Mary's behalf.
Oh, Marshall. I love you.
And then Stan and Marshall both figure out that Mary's missing.
And they are both shaken. They can't live without their Mary. They just can't. Their world wouldn't be right without her existence.
- Jinx is still very dramatically distraught over her audition and she drinks, and Brandi calls and asks her for a ride.
- And now we get to one of the greatest scenes in the history of the world. MARSHALL IS CRYING OMG OMG OMG!!!! HE'S CRYING FOR MARY!
He's lost and distraught as he's walking by Dershowitz.
And he still manages to lovingly make a joking remark about Mary when he sees the notepad and says, "It means she had a lot on her mind." OH! Marshall. And dudes, look at #5. Dating service? Is this her notepad from last week? Because if it is, wouldn't she have crossed out all that stuff? Wasn't Maureen the name of the lady in last week's ep? I'm pretty sure it was. Unless now Mary really is going to try the dating service. Hmm... Anyway, back to Marshy Warshy.
He asks if he can keep the top sheet so that he can hold it to his nose and smell the remnants of Mary and run his fingers over the lettering and swear that he can feel her hand in his with every pen stroke and he holds it to his chest at night and weeps into his pillow...
And his voice cracks!!!!!!! He's unabashedly choking up in front of Dershowitz and he's too filled with grief and worry over Mary to care what he thinks of him. And Bobby D works his way into my heart by completely sympathizing with Marshall and trying to comfort him.
And Marshall looks like a lost child as he wanders away, and Stan stays strong for him, trying to reassure him the way that a loving father would, but he's sick with worry too, and Marshall knows that, and so he pretends to be positive, for both his and Stan's sake.
And then he breathes in and looks down, and my heart breaks. You can tell that he blames himself for not being there when Mary needed him. It doesn't matter that he had no clue she was in trouble, had no way of knowing, he still feels responsible, because she's his partner and he's supposed to protect her. And he loves her with all of his heart. And one of the reasons why this scene was so moving was because Marshall is usually such a laid back guy, he's not into showing his grief or anger or pain, he keeps it to himself. And then here is choking up in front of his coworkers, letting his emotions spill out, needing to be comforted in a small way, needing that reassurance that they'd find Mary, that Mary would be okay. Gah, I loved this scene.
- Brandi and Jinx back together again. Blerg. Luckily their scene was pretty short.
- Helloooooooo Mary.
All of the men in the audience (and possibly a good number of women) suddenly feel all tingly in their pants.
And now all the women (and possibly a good number of men) suddenly feel all tingly in their pants.
And Marshall doesn't trust Brandi as far as he can throw 5 whales.
...Fuck me, I think I just became a Stan/Jinx shipper. Aaaaah! No! I can't make Stan suffer her craziness! Why must my brain do that? I blame whoever suggested it to me way back when the show first started. I forget who it was, but... I'd be calling you out right now if I could remember. But the way that Stan just kind of melted when Jinx went into her dramatic, "Please, save my baby," routine? Yeah, I could see them dating in the future. Jinx could manipulate the hell out of him, and he could genuinely love her, and she'd try so hard to make it work because he's such a sweet guy, but she'd have confidence issues because she wouldn't think she'd deserve someone that great, and he'd be all sweet and reassuring and playful and adorable and OMG! I TOTALLY SHIP STAN/JINX! Mary would blow a gasket once she found out they were dating. And you know they'd date secretly at first because they wouldn't want Mary to know. OMG! THIS IS GOING TO HAPPEN! I'M CALLING IT RIGHT NOW!
- Brandi is in this whole mess because Chuck said if I didn't do it he wouldn't love me anymore. Oh boo freaking hoo. WTF, Brandi? Your sister is in mortal danger because you have abandonment issues? Ugh! Oh well, it did give us this kickass episode, so I forgive you.
- Mary practices for her first night with Marshall:
- Marshall and Stan meet Special Agent Asswipe. Stan comes pretty close to kicking his ass, but Marshall holds him off. Jinx and Brandi have huge wrap sheets. Mary's is much smaller and not all that surprising (except for the lewd vagrancy, not quite sure what was going on there):
Since Mary was so shocked by seeing her mother looking like a prostitute, I doubt that the lewd vagrancy charge was in relation to prostitution, but... I don't know. Disorderly conduct isn't hard to imagine though. Anyway, Stan and Marshall are pissed at Asswipe for wanting to give Mary's identity to the press and looking up her file.
Marshall shoots death rays at Asswipe. Asswipe disintegrates. Well, we wish he did, anyway.
Instead, Marshall settles for knocking his papers on the floor. Hee. "Oops, you dropped something." I always love Marshall best when he acts like an 8-year-old.
- The Joker's back
And he meets his immovable object. Damn straight! Mary = Batman. Anyway, Spanky is angry at:
Broken Nose Dude, because BND is a total moron and he kidnapped Mary instead of Brandi. Because she was a hot blond. And that made Mary feel a tad bit better about being kidnapped. Plus, she was happy it was her and not Brandi, because Brandi would never have survived, and Mary will protect Brandi at all costs. So, Spanky hits this guy in the nose, which was already broken by Mary. And then he shoots Chuck while talking to Brandi.
And we see Mary truly scared for the first time, but she still managed to hold herself together.
Oh, Asswipe, go away. Aren't you supposed to be off somewhere wiping somebody's ass? Because I'm pretty sure that's what your job is.
- The boys finally get a break when they realize that Mary wrote down a license plate number.
Mmm, double the pleasure, double the fun. Sorry. I apologize. I'm being very obscene tonight. I blame Mary and the boys for looking so damn fine.
See? Do you see what I mean? Anyway, Marshall finally has a little hope.
- Okay. Please refrain from throwing shoes and stiletto heel boots at me, but... I was totally feeling some vibes between Brandi/Asswipe. This proves that my tendency to ship characters has gotten out of control. But the way he was all forceful with her and was trying so desperately to be intimidating with his clicky pen and failed miserably? That... that was kinda hot. Particularly when Brandi made fun of his haircut. And he was very concerned about her happiness. Why? Because he believes that he can make her happy and he hates that she's wasting her life with scum like Chuck. And then he got all offended when she said she was happy except when she's in the same vicinity of him, so he threw her arrest history in her face. So she makes fun of his lameass haircut. And it just makes him love her even more:
And then he talks about death row with a faraway look, like his father had been on death row and he had to watch him die and it killed him inside and he hated growing up with the stigma of having a murderer for a father, so he vowed to spend the rest of his life putting criminals behind bars, and that's why he's an FBI agent. It was all there in his eyes.
Brandi was too busy worrying about Mary to notice. Poor Asswipe. :( He was pouring out his heart to her. He wanted her to be the Rachel Dawes to his Harvey Dent. *sniff* TOO BAD ASSWIPE! I already told you that you couldn't be Harvey.
ASDFJKL;SDFJHFG;LKDFJDS;FKL NO JACKET OMG OMG OMG!!!!! Oh, and uh... they got the name of one of the guys who kidnapped Mary, and Marshall got excited.
- Mary figures out that the hook she's chained to is loose, and she starts trying to screw it out of the wall, but then Spanky shows up again. Poo. And Mary being the brilliant and awesome woman she is, convinces Spanky that Brandi cheated her out of 5,000 Gs and she gets him on her side. Until stupid Broken Nose Dude blabs about the news report and Mary being a federal marshal. And Spanky, being the stupid criminal he is, leaves Broken Nose Dude to kill Mary. Now, BND is a moron, has screwed everything up from the beginning, and that's who he puts in charge of getting rid of Mary? I don't think he really wanted to kill her. Because she completes him. She is the Batman to his Joker. Or... he's just really stupid. But Mary knew that Broken Nose Dude was both moronic and weak, and she took advantage of this.
- Marshall and company find guy's house, but they have Mary at other guy's house.
*dreamy sigh*
- And now we get to the squicky bit. Broken Nose Dude decides he wants to have a little fun with her before he kills her.
"I'm not a monster. I want you to die happy."
Seriously? What a douche.
So, Mary plays the willing/submissive yet slightly frightened victim, and BND is such a douche that he truly believes Mary wants him, and he makes me puke when he licks her because the whole situation is just gross and sweaty and icky and it's about dominance and Mary is trying so hard to fight through her fear and disgust to do what she has to do, and then she makes her move. She head butts him and spins as fast as she can to get the hook to unscrew from the wooden pole, and she gets loose just in time, ducks under the shovel, pulls out her gun, and shoots him about 5 times in the chest.
And it's just so glorious to see Mary have the power back, to see her come out of that situation and kill the guy who tried to take her power away from her. And then I got nauseous again when the friend comes running down the stairs saying not to kill her till he's had his turn. *shudder* And Mary's adrenaline is pumping (as is the audience's) and she shoots at this guy a little too soon, and he goes running back up the stairs and they're shooting at each other through the floor.
And then we hear different gunshots and the pitter-patter of shoes and Mary is out of bullets so all she has is the shovel.
And she sees the gun and she swings, but it's Stan, and he ducks, because he knows Mary. And even though Mary sees it's Stan, it doesn't register that she's out of danger until she sees Marshall.
And that's when it clicks that she's alive, she's safe, it's all over. And she just lets the adrenaline deflate out of her.
And Marshall is just SO HAPPY to see her that he can't contain his glee.
And he grabs onto her and for the briefest of moments he leans in a touch, pulling her closer, then lets go.
But she collapses on him because she knows that he'll be there to hold her up, always. And it's just so damn beautiful.
- Back at the station, there's a bit of tension between Marshall and Mary about Brandi. She knows Marshall's disapproving voice, and she won't stand for him messing with her baby sister.
And so he backs off, because she asks him to, and he just wants to take her home and hold her in his arms and rock her to sleep. Er... I mean, get her home.
And he makes a motion like he wants to guide her by touching the small of her back, but he doesn't.
And he emits hearts at her as they walk to the elevator, and she has no clue that he's been looking at her the whole time with a dreamy look in his eyes and thanking god that she was alive.
And then Asswipe showed up, and he very insincerely said he was glad she was okay. Then he asked her about Brandi, because the poor man is obsessed. And he told Stan that no one should get in the way of his investigation.
And Mary thought, "Jesus Josephine Zanzabar, what a freaking asswipe."
And then Stan locked Asswipe out on the balcony. And he was very satisfied with himself, as he should be.
I love you, Stan. *hugs*
Fun Fact:
I keep typing Brando instead of Brandi. It's annoying. Why couldn't her name just be Brando? It would be a lot easier on me.
- The episode starts out in present time and we finally see Brandi's infamous boyfriend Chuck. In his bathrobe. And he's scuzzy. And reeks of slimeball. You can tell he's a guy who usually talks his way out of everything, which is exactly what he did when the FBI showed up. But then Spanky shows up.
And Chuck craps his pants when Spanky and company kill the FBI agents.
Why so SERIOUS?
Honestly, the resemblance is uncanny. Spanky is totally The Joker, only he has a beard instead of scars. "You wanna know how I got this beard? My dad stole my razor. The bastard." So now we have a tale of an unstoppable force called Spanky, and a jackass named Chuck. And Spanky kidnaps Chuck so that he'll tell him where Brandi is.
- Mary comes to the realization that her family will be the death of her, and she so conveniently comes to this conclusion just in time for some prime foreshadowing. And Mary notices two jerkwads following her and writes down their license plate number.
- Mary's mom is a prostitute.
And do you know who the first person is that Mary calls to spew this news to? DO YOU KNOW?
And he's totally squeeing on the inside, because you only call your one true love with that kind of news. Seriously. And all he can think about is when she's coming into work, because he misses her and feels weird when she's not there and he gets this little thrill shooting through his stomach whenever she walks by and he catches a whiff of her shampoo, and she makes him excited to go to work every day. It's true. I'm not making this up, people.
Okay, fine. Maybe I am. Jeez, Mary, you really know how to rain on my parade. What's that? Your mother's dressed like a hooker?
Doesn't she always kinda... dress like a...
- So, Mary walks in on Jinx auditioning for that play from a couple episodes ago.
And Jinx is horrified in the most over the top way possible:
And she goes off on Mary with an insane rant about how she ruins everything good for her and Brandi and how Mary's only happy when they're failing she's being very dramatic and nasty about it all.
Bitch, you crazy.
But of course, Mary is hurt, because her own mother just told her that she's a cruel cruel person who doesn't deserve to live.
And all Mary ever tries to do is make them happy and she loves them despite their complete idiocy, but Mary's self esteem is low enough that she'll believe Jinx. Mary might be a strong, confident woman when it comes to dealing with the scum of the earth, but when it comes to dealing with her insane family and relationship woes, she is so lost and confused and completely fragile, and my heart hurts for her. :'( And of course there had to be a big fallout scene because Mary was about to be kidnapped and this makes it more dramatic.
Hello, I'm Special Agent Asswipe, I'm in this episode purely to make everyone's life a living hell. I'm worse than Spanky. That's right. Hey, can I be Harvey Dent in this scenerio?
No.
Why not?
Because you were never Albuquerque's white knight. Asswipe.
- Then the two jerkwads from earlier attack Mary from behind as she's talking to Asswipe, and she kicks one guy in the nuts and she uses her patented head butt move on the other guy, but he had gotten her with a rag of that stuff that makes you pass out. So she would have gotten away had it not been for that. And Asswipe? He's on the phone the entire time and is acting all affronted that she isn't answering him, despite hearing a scuffle in the background. And a homeless guy sees the whole thing and is super calm about it.
- Brandi and Raph continue to prove that they are a better match than Raph/Mary, but we also see how much they both really do love and care about Mary. And for some reason the show felt a need to show some gratuitous Raph butt.
Why do they not do that for Marshall? Hmm? Oh, and Brandi punches Raph, much in the same way that Mary likes to punch Marshall. A punch from the Shannon women obviously means, "I loooooooove you."
Also, Asswipe calls Brandi's phone and tracks her location.
- Dershowitz is back.
And he's back to being his awesome self. Especially when he figures out that Mary was kidnapped.
- Marshall sees that two FBI agents were killed in North Vale, NJ, and he automatically worries on Mary's behalf.
Oh, Marshall. I love you.
And then Stan and Marshall both figure out that Mary's missing.
And they are both shaken. They can't live without their Mary. They just can't. Their world wouldn't be right without her existence.
- Jinx is still very dramatically distraught over her audition and she drinks, and Brandi calls and asks her for a ride.
- And now we get to one of the greatest scenes in the history of the world. MARSHALL IS CRYING OMG OMG OMG!!!! HE'S CRYING FOR MARY!
He's lost and distraught as he's walking by Dershowitz.
And he still manages to lovingly make a joking remark about Mary when he sees the notepad and says, "It means she had a lot on her mind." OH! Marshall. And dudes, look at #5. Dating service? Is this her notepad from last week? Because if it is, wouldn't she have crossed out all that stuff? Wasn't Maureen the name of the lady in last week's ep? I'm pretty sure it was. Unless now Mary really is going to try the dating service. Hmm... Anyway, back to Marshy Warshy.
He asks if he can keep the top sheet so that he can hold it to his nose and smell the remnants of Mary and run his fingers over the lettering and swear that he can feel her hand in his with every pen stroke and he holds it to his chest at night and weeps into his pillow...
And his voice cracks!!!!!!! He's unabashedly choking up in front of Dershowitz and he's too filled with grief and worry over Mary to care what he thinks of him. And Bobby D works his way into my heart by completely sympathizing with Marshall and trying to comfort him.
And Marshall looks like a lost child as he wanders away, and Stan stays strong for him, trying to reassure him the way that a loving father would, but he's sick with worry too, and Marshall knows that, and so he pretends to be positive, for both his and Stan's sake.
And then he breathes in and looks down, and my heart breaks. You can tell that he blames himself for not being there when Mary needed him. It doesn't matter that he had no clue she was in trouble, had no way of knowing, he still feels responsible, because she's his partner and he's supposed to protect her. And he loves her with all of his heart. And one of the reasons why this scene was so moving was because Marshall is usually such a laid back guy, he's not into showing his grief or anger or pain, he keeps it to himself. And then here is choking up in front of his coworkers, letting his emotions spill out, needing to be comforted in a small way, needing that reassurance that they'd find Mary, that Mary would be okay. Gah, I loved this scene.
- Brandi and Jinx back together again. Blerg. Luckily their scene was pretty short.
- Helloooooooo Mary.
All of the men in the audience (and possibly a good number of women) suddenly feel all tingly in their pants.
And now all the women (and possibly a good number of men) suddenly feel all tingly in their pants.
And Marshall doesn't trust Brandi as far as he can throw 5 whales.
...Fuck me, I think I just became a Stan/Jinx shipper. Aaaaah! No! I can't make Stan suffer her craziness! Why must my brain do that? I blame whoever suggested it to me way back when the show first started. I forget who it was, but... I'd be calling you out right now if I could remember. But the way that Stan just kind of melted when Jinx went into her dramatic, "Please, save my baby," routine? Yeah, I could see them dating in the future. Jinx could manipulate the hell out of him, and he could genuinely love her, and she'd try so hard to make it work because he's such a sweet guy, but she'd have confidence issues because she wouldn't think she'd deserve someone that great, and he'd be all sweet and reassuring and playful and adorable and OMG! I TOTALLY SHIP STAN/JINX! Mary would blow a gasket once she found out they were dating. And you know they'd date secretly at first because they wouldn't want Mary to know. OMG! THIS IS GOING TO HAPPEN! I'M CALLING IT RIGHT NOW!
- Brandi is in this whole mess because Chuck said if I didn't do it he wouldn't love me anymore. Oh boo freaking hoo. WTF, Brandi? Your sister is in mortal danger because you have abandonment issues? Ugh! Oh well, it did give us this kickass episode, so I forgive you.
- Mary practices for her first night with Marshall:
- Marshall and Stan meet Special Agent Asswipe. Stan comes pretty close to kicking his ass, but Marshall holds him off. Jinx and Brandi have huge wrap sheets. Mary's is much smaller and not all that surprising (except for the lewd vagrancy, not quite sure what was going on there):
Since Mary was so shocked by seeing her mother looking like a prostitute, I doubt that the lewd vagrancy charge was in relation to prostitution, but... I don't know. Disorderly conduct isn't hard to imagine though. Anyway, Stan and Marshall are pissed at Asswipe for wanting to give Mary's identity to the press and looking up her file.
Marshall shoots death rays at Asswipe. Asswipe disintegrates. Well, we wish he did, anyway.
Instead, Marshall settles for knocking his papers on the floor. Hee. "Oops, you dropped something." I always love Marshall best when he acts like an 8-year-old.
- The Joker's back
And he meets his immovable object. Damn straight! Mary = Batman. Anyway, Spanky is angry at:
Broken Nose Dude, because BND is a total moron and he kidnapped Mary instead of Brandi. Because she was a hot blond. And that made Mary feel a tad bit better about being kidnapped. Plus, she was happy it was her and not Brandi, because Brandi would never have survived, and Mary will protect Brandi at all costs. So, Spanky hits this guy in the nose, which was already broken by Mary. And then he shoots Chuck while talking to Brandi.
And we see Mary truly scared for the first time, but she still managed to hold herself together.
Oh, Asswipe, go away. Aren't you supposed to be off somewhere wiping somebody's ass? Because I'm pretty sure that's what your job is.
- The boys finally get a break when they realize that Mary wrote down a license plate number.
Mmm, double the pleasure, double the fun. Sorry. I apologize. I'm being very obscene tonight. I blame Mary and the boys for looking so damn fine.
See? Do you see what I mean? Anyway, Marshall finally has a little hope.
- Okay. Please refrain from throwing shoes and stiletto heel boots at me, but... I was totally feeling some vibes between Brandi/Asswipe. This proves that my tendency to ship characters has gotten out of control. But the way he was all forceful with her and was trying so desperately to be intimidating with his clicky pen and failed miserably? That... that was kinda hot. Particularly when Brandi made fun of his haircut. And he was very concerned about her happiness. Why? Because he believes that he can make her happy and he hates that she's wasting her life with scum like Chuck. And then he got all offended when she said she was happy except when she's in the same vicinity of him, so he threw her arrest history in her face. So she makes fun of his lameass haircut. And it just makes him love her even more:
And then he talks about death row with a faraway look, like his father had been on death row and he had to watch him die and it killed him inside and he hated growing up with the stigma of having a murderer for a father, so he vowed to spend the rest of his life putting criminals behind bars, and that's why he's an FBI agent. It was all there in his eyes.
Brandi was too busy worrying about Mary to notice. Poor Asswipe. :( He was pouring out his heart to her. He wanted her to be the Rachel Dawes to his Harvey Dent. *sniff* TOO BAD ASSWIPE! I already told you that you couldn't be Harvey.
ASDFJKL;SDFJHFG;LKDFJDS;FKL NO JACKET OMG OMG OMG!!!!! Oh, and uh... they got the name of one of the guys who kidnapped Mary, and Marshall got excited.
- Mary figures out that the hook she's chained to is loose, and she starts trying to screw it out of the wall, but then Spanky shows up again. Poo. And Mary being the brilliant and awesome woman she is, convinces Spanky that Brandi cheated her out of 5,000 Gs and she gets him on her side. Until stupid Broken Nose Dude blabs about the news report and Mary being a federal marshal. And Spanky, being the stupid criminal he is, leaves Broken Nose Dude to kill Mary. Now, BND is a moron, has screwed everything up from the beginning, and that's who he puts in charge of getting rid of Mary? I don't think he really wanted to kill her. Because she completes him. She is the Batman to his Joker. Or... he's just really stupid. But Mary knew that Broken Nose Dude was both moronic and weak, and she took advantage of this.
- Marshall and company find guy's house, but they have Mary at other guy's house.
*dreamy sigh*
- And now we get to the squicky bit. Broken Nose Dude decides he wants to have a little fun with her before he kills her.
"I'm not a monster. I want you to die happy."
Seriously? What a douche.
So, Mary plays the willing/submissive yet slightly frightened victim, and BND is such a douche that he truly believes Mary wants him, and he makes me puke when he licks her because the whole situation is just gross and sweaty and icky and it's about dominance and Mary is trying so hard to fight through her fear and disgust to do what she has to do, and then she makes her move. She head butts him and spins as fast as she can to get the hook to unscrew from the wooden pole, and she gets loose just in time, ducks under the shovel, pulls out her gun, and shoots him about 5 times in the chest.
And it's just so glorious to see Mary have the power back, to see her come out of that situation and kill the guy who tried to take her power away from her. And then I got nauseous again when the friend comes running down the stairs saying not to kill her till he's had his turn. *shudder* And Mary's adrenaline is pumping (as is the audience's) and she shoots at this guy a little too soon, and he goes running back up the stairs and they're shooting at each other through the floor.
And then we hear different gunshots and the pitter-patter of shoes and Mary is out of bullets so all she has is the shovel.
And she sees the gun and she swings, but it's Stan, and he ducks, because he knows Mary. And even though Mary sees it's Stan, it doesn't register that she's out of danger until she sees Marshall.
And that's when it clicks that she's alive, she's safe, it's all over. And she just lets the adrenaline deflate out of her.
And Marshall is just SO HAPPY to see her that he can't contain his glee.
And he grabs onto her and for the briefest of moments he leans in a touch, pulling her closer, then lets go.
But she collapses on him because she knows that he'll be there to hold her up, always. And it's just so damn beautiful.
- Back at the station, there's a bit of tension between Marshall and Mary about Brandi. She knows Marshall's disapproving voice, and she won't stand for him messing with her baby sister.
And so he backs off, because she asks him to, and he just wants to take her home and hold her in his arms and rock her to sleep. Er... I mean, get her home.
And he makes a motion like he wants to guide her by touching the small of her back, but he doesn't.
And he emits hearts at her as they walk to the elevator, and she has no clue that he's been looking at her the whole time with a dreamy look in his eyes and thanking god that she was alive.
And then Asswipe showed up, and he very insincerely said he was glad she was okay. Then he asked her about Brandi, because the poor man is obsessed. And he told Stan that no one should get in the way of his investigation.
And Mary thought, "Jesus Josephine Zanzabar, what a freaking asswipe."
And then Stan locked Asswipe out on the balcony. And he was very satisfied with himself, as he should be.
I love you, Stan. *hugs*
Fun Fact:
I keep typing Brando instead of Brandi. It's annoying. Why couldn't her name just be Brando? It would be a lot easier on me.