ouch ouch ouch. woke up this morning after having three dreams about ben feeling very emo. I went through my old journal todays_lesson  and i was reading how happy i was.. and some of the comments ben made were sad. Fuck why did it turn out like this. I try to be so strong.. but really im not. Really im all broken and hurting inside. and he's not. And i feel ( Read more... )

ok hm. I just realised that in the past two days i have had in total about 8-9 hours sleep, and i wondered why i was feeling so fucked ( Read more... )

ah well, how about another journal entry to ramble absoloute shit.

I have to pee. I have to do a lot of things. Its my day off tomorrow. they offered me some hours for it.. i should have accepted them. ah well. I have been listening to misery signals heaps. so good. 'i feel the need to hide inside your loving arms' I was so emo at work theother ( Read more... )

Ah, well i have attempted to go off the pill and lasted 3 days. I remember now why i went on the pill. I am fucked up in the head (see this is what not being on the pill does to me). It turns me into this freak that cant understand why i am feeling what i am feeling. I think i like you. I dont know. I miss people. I work alot. I am sad alot ( Read more... )

Ahhh hello. How are you's.. good thats good.. sameold shit as always. It would have been ten months tomorrow.. not that im regretting ♥ Listen to some Postal service.. it will enlighten you. "we become silhouettes when our bodies finally go." awww.

ok well i am going to post somepictures that i took of myself.. im feeling a little vain, but ( Read more... )

Across Five Aprils - A Year From Now

Complete and total adoration,

My gift to you, my heart was yours,

In ten weeks you shaped it,

In one night you murdered it.

Torn from my chest and laid at your feet,

That first step that you took was the worst.

Since then you've walked a thousand miles in solace and short remark,

And I still have these memories
( Read more... )

Do you like to ( Read more... )

hey there guysey wiseys.. alot has happened this weekend.. but all for the best. i have so much to say but im not in the mood. I woke up really sick today i caught something on the weekend.. so i couldnt go to work, so i have bed ridden all day. Ill see how im feeling tomorrow. I cant wait to go to brisbane again this weekend. I think im going to ( Read more... )

wow im loving everyone and everything at the moment.

one day, plato asked his teacher, "what is love? how can i find it?" his teacher answered, "there is a vast wheat field in front. walk forward without turning back, and pick only one stalk. if you find the most magnificent stalk, then you have found love." plato walked forward, and before long, he returned with empty hands, having picked nothing. ( Read more... )