If I'm happy, you're...yeah

[mashfanficchick]

Not that anything happened now--reading ace!Sherlock fic made me think of it--but isn't it nice to know that my mother thinks my sexuality is "even creepier" and less understandable than "normal" asexuality? Ok, the less understandable, I sort of...well, understand. Sort of. But the "creepier"? That's so totally offensive on two completely separate

Comments

[smudley]

{{HUGS}} I'm so so sorry you're having to go through this. I understand. I empathize. No matter how much we pride ourselves on independent thinking and living our own lives, most of us yearn for parental approval, the acceptance of at least one of our parents. Without that, we feel something is missing. I've learned one thing, and it's a hard, hard lesson. If your parents can't accept who you are, that doesn't have to break you. What will break you, I've learned, is if you can't accept yourself. I tell myself nearly every day that I believe in who I am and accept who I am and try to ignore the pain of knowing that my parents don't accept me. This advice is well-intentioned, but I know it's not one-size fits all. I understand how much it hurts, what you're going through with your mom. I'm here for you. Anytime you need to talk, don't hesitate to reach out. You know where to find me. :) Hang in there.

[mashfanficchick]

*hugs you back*

I think (as usual) that you're absolutely right about the "yearning for parental approval" thing. And, I'll even go one step farther and say that the one silver lining to my mom's open opinions on my sexuality is that it's given my father a much-needed (though of course he didn't/doesn't realize it) chance to be the good guy for once. Seriously: it helps both me and the relationship I have with my dad more than I can say to know that he--the parent of mine who mostly thinks of me as a lazy, pathetic failure--responded to my coming out as a/autosexual with a mixture of indifference (the good kind!), curiosity, and support, and that he continues to be supportive of my wants, needs, and choices in that area, not only wanting only for me to be happy, but fully believing that I can be happy and fulfilled as an a/autosexual person. And that fact--that my dad, who in all other areas is the very opposite of supportive, can and does support my sexual (or not!) orientation and lifestyle, and that his doing so means so much to me