It Gets Interesting
Josef and the Box That Fell from Somewhere Next to His Ceiling
After some time, Arend entered.
“What do you guys want?”
“Don’t you knock?”
“Josef, you’re the one who wanted me to come over.”
“You could at least knock instead of scaring us half to death. I mean, all of a sudden there’s some guy in my room.”
“I’m not just some guy.”
“Sorry, Arend. You’re beautiful and unique.”
“Shut up.”
Mason stood up from the bed.
“Arend, thank you for coming. Both Josef and I greatly appreciate it, despite my friend’s remarks. Don’t we appreciate it, Josef.”
“Yeah.”
“This better be good. I was working on a program.”
“Oh, really? What class?”
“341.”
“Is that the one for advanced quantum computing?”
“Something like that.”
“Is it fun?”
“No. Hey, listen, why am I here?”
Mason picked the box up off the floor.
“We need you to open this for us.”
“Open it for you? Why can’t you do it?”
“It’s a complicated story. Just open it up and look inside. Take you two minutes.”
“No. If you guys won’t do it, why should I?”
Mason sighed.
“Arend, it’s just a box. There’s no need to worry about anything.”
“Who’s worrying? And if there’s no need to worry, why don’t you open it?”
“I said it’s complicated. Look, just do this and we’ll let you get back to your homework. We’ll even buy you lunch sometime maybe.”
Mason handed the box to Arend.
“Alright, fine. Got any scissors?”
Josef gave him the pair that sat on the top shelf of the desk. Arend began to work at the tape. He glanced at Mason and Josef. Mason and Josef grinned. Arend rolled his eyes and slit the tape in two. S he began to open the box, he stopped.
“I have a bad feeling about this.”
“Why?”
“It’s just a strange situation. That’s all. Who’s this from, anyway?”
“Josef’s grandmother.”
“Then why doesn’t Josef open it?”
“Because there’s this certain kind of dust that floats through the air at my grandmother’s house and I’m allergic to it. Whenever I get a package from her, I break out into hives because whatever’s inside the box is covered in that dust. I think it comes from her cat or something.”
“Mason could have opened this for you. Or you could have worn gloves.”
“I’m allergic to it as well. And gloves don’t help.”
Arend snorted. He looked back down at the box.
Mason turned to Josef and gave him a thumbs up. Josef gave a half-smile and nodded.
Arend opened the box and looked inside. Mason and Josef took a deep breath. For a moment, Arend stared at whatever was inside, but the yell he then emitted caused him to drop the box
“Ow!”
Mason and Josef jumped.
“Ow! Ow ow ow!”
Mason took a step back toward the window. Josef crouched behind his desk.
“What happened?”
“Son of a bitch, ow!”
Around folded in half. His hands were on the sides of his head.
“Holy shit! That hurt like hell!”
Josef turned to Mason.
“I’m not looking inside that thing.”
“Me either.”
“Ow!”
“I’m glad we had Arend come over.”
“Me, too.”
“Jesus, Mary, and Joseph!”
“I wonder if he’ll leave now.”
“Probably.”
“Peter, Paul, and Thomas!”
“I hope his assignment goes well.”
“That’s nice of you.”
“For God’s sake, ow!”
“I didn’t know Arend was a religious man.”
“Let’s see how much he knows about the Old Testament.”
“Jesus H. Christ that hurt.”
Josef stood up.
“Are you okay?”
Arend unfolded.
“Ah! Yes, I think so.”
Mason took a step forward.
“Are you sure.”
“Yes. Ah!”
“Can you take your hands off your head.”
“I think so. Ah!”
Josef blinked.
“Do you have to keep screaming?”
“Ah! Yes. Ah!”
“I thought it stopped hurting?”
“Yes. Ah! And no. Ah! Sort of.”
He snorted.
There was a knock at the door. Josef made for it.
“I’ll get it.”
It was Grigor.
“Good afternoon, Grigor. How are you today?”
“What’s going on in here?”
“Arend’s just opening a package for us. That’s all.”
“Are you okay Arend?”
“Ah!”
“Is he okay?”
“Yes, he’s fine.”
“Why would a package make him scream like that?”
“It’s from my grandmother.”
“Why should that matter?”
“She has that affect on people. Listen, everything’s really okay. Seriously. Don’t worry about it. Arend appreciates that you stopped by, though. To check on his well-being and all.”
“I didn’t stop by to check on his well-being. I was trying to get some work done and then all of a sudden somebody starts screaming. All I want is for everyone to shut up.”
“We’ll make him stop.”
“What’s in the box, anyway? Can I see?”
Mason stepped over to the door, box in hand.
“Sure. Knock yourself out.”
Mason began to hand Grigor the box, but before he could do so, Josef grabbed it and held the opening to his stomach.
“No. It’s not important what’s in the box. Grigor, thank you for stopping by. Good luck with your work. We will keep Arend quiet.”
“Whatever. See ya.”
Josef closed the door.
Without looking inside, Josef closed the box. He grabbed some tape from his desk and resealed the top. He put the box on his shelf. Mason frowned.
“You could have shown Grigor.”
“No way. This thing did something weird to Arend. Look at him.”
Arend’s head leaned to one side as he stared out the window. His eyes did not move in a focusing twitch, nor did he blink.
Mason put his hand on Arend’s shoulder.
“Are you okay?”
“Ah!”
Mason turned to Josef.
“The screaming appears to be some sort of reflexive action. Maybe it will wear off eventually.”
“Some sort of reflexive action? What are you, a doctor?”
“No. But I think he’ll be okay. Want to play chess until he come to?”
“I have to work on my paper.”
“Oh, come on. You won’t get any work done with this zombie in the room. Look at how distracting he is.”
“He’s like a lava lamp. You’re right. I can’t work with him here. Then again, I probably couldn’t play a good game of chess with him here, either.”
“Want to put him in the closet?”
“Sure.”
Josef opened the closet door. He and Mason then lifted Arend into the closet and stood him against the wall and between two coats. Josef reached up to the top shelf and brought down the chessboard. Arend stared. Mason closed the closet door.
Mason played white. Josef played black. The sun sank a noticeable distance in the sky and the shadows lengthened across the wall. The yellow tree swayed in a gentle breeze.
TBC...
W.
After some time, Arend entered.
“What do you guys want?”
“Don’t you knock?”
“Josef, you’re the one who wanted me to come over.”
“You could at least knock instead of scaring us half to death. I mean, all of a sudden there’s some guy in my room.”
“I’m not just some guy.”
“Sorry, Arend. You’re beautiful and unique.”
“Shut up.”
Mason stood up from the bed.
“Arend, thank you for coming. Both Josef and I greatly appreciate it, despite my friend’s remarks. Don’t we appreciate it, Josef.”
“Yeah.”
“This better be good. I was working on a program.”
“Oh, really? What class?”
“341.”
“Is that the one for advanced quantum computing?”
“Something like that.”
“Is it fun?”
“No. Hey, listen, why am I here?”
Mason picked the box up off the floor.
“We need you to open this for us.”
“Open it for you? Why can’t you do it?”
“It’s a complicated story. Just open it up and look inside. Take you two minutes.”
“No. If you guys won’t do it, why should I?”
Mason sighed.
“Arend, it’s just a box. There’s no need to worry about anything.”
“Who’s worrying? And if there’s no need to worry, why don’t you open it?”
“I said it’s complicated. Look, just do this and we’ll let you get back to your homework. We’ll even buy you lunch sometime maybe.”
Mason handed the box to Arend.
“Alright, fine. Got any scissors?”
Josef gave him the pair that sat on the top shelf of the desk. Arend began to work at the tape. He glanced at Mason and Josef. Mason and Josef grinned. Arend rolled his eyes and slit the tape in two. S he began to open the box, he stopped.
“I have a bad feeling about this.”
“Why?”
“It’s just a strange situation. That’s all. Who’s this from, anyway?”
“Josef’s grandmother.”
“Then why doesn’t Josef open it?”
“Because there’s this certain kind of dust that floats through the air at my grandmother’s house and I’m allergic to it. Whenever I get a package from her, I break out into hives because whatever’s inside the box is covered in that dust. I think it comes from her cat or something.”
“Mason could have opened this for you. Or you could have worn gloves.”
“I’m allergic to it as well. And gloves don’t help.”
Arend snorted. He looked back down at the box.
Mason turned to Josef and gave him a thumbs up. Josef gave a half-smile and nodded.
Arend opened the box and looked inside. Mason and Josef took a deep breath. For a moment, Arend stared at whatever was inside, but the yell he then emitted caused him to drop the box
“Ow!”
Mason and Josef jumped.
“Ow! Ow ow ow!”
Mason took a step back toward the window. Josef crouched behind his desk.
“What happened?”
“Son of a bitch, ow!”
Around folded in half. His hands were on the sides of his head.
“Holy shit! That hurt like hell!”
Josef turned to Mason.
“I’m not looking inside that thing.”
“Me either.”
“Ow!”
“I’m glad we had Arend come over.”
“Me, too.”
“Jesus, Mary, and Joseph!”
“I wonder if he’ll leave now.”
“Probably.”
“Peter, Paul, and Thomas!”
“I hope his assignment goes well.”
“That’s nice of you.”
“For God’s sake, ow!”
“I didn’t know Arend was a religious man.”
“Let’s see how much he knows about the Old Testament.”
“Jesus H. Christ that hurt.”
Josef stood up.
“Are you okay?”
Arend unfolded.
“Ah! Yes, I think so.”
Mason took a step forward.
“Are you sure.”
“Yes. Ah!”
“Can you take your hands off your head.”
“I think so. Ah!”
Josef blinked.
“Do you have to keep screaming?”
“Ah! Yes. Ah!”
“I thought it stopped hurting?”
“Yes. Ah! And no. Ah! Sort of.”
He snorted.
There was a knock at the door. Josef made for it.
“I’ll get it.”
It was Grigor.
“Good afternoon, Grigor. How are you today?”
“What’s going on in here?”
“Arend’s just opening a package for us. That’s all.”
“Are you okay Arend?”
“Ah!”
“Is he okay?”
“Yes, he’s fine.”
“Why would a package make him scream like that?”
“It’s from my grandmother.”
“Why should that matter?”
“She has that affect on people. Listen, everything’s really okay. Seriously. Don’t worry about it. Arend appreciates that you stopped by, though. To check on his well-being and all.”
“I didn’t stop by to check on his well-being. I was trying to get some work done and then all of a sudden somebody starts screaming. All I want is for everyone to shut up.”
“We’ll make him stop.”
“What’s in the box, anyway? Can I see?”
Mason stepped over to the door, box in hand.
“Sure. Knock yourself out.”
Mason began to hand Grigor the box, but before he could do so, Josef grabbed it and held the opening to his stomach.
“No. It’s not important what’s in the box. Grigor, thank you for stopping by. Good luck with your work. We will keep Arend quiet.”
“Whatever. See ya.”
Josef closed the door.
Without looking inside, Josef closed the box. He grabbed some tape from his desk and resealed the top. He put the box on his shelf. Mason frowned.
“You could have shown Grigor.”
“No way. This thing did something weird to Arend. Look at him.”
Arend’s head leaned to one side as he stared out the window. His eyes did not move in a focusing twitch, nor did he blink.
Mason put his hand on Arend’s shoulder.
“Are you okay?”
“Ah!”
Mason turned to Josef.
“The screaming appears to be some sort of reflexive action. Maybe it will wear off eventually.”
“Some sort of reflexive action? What are you, a doctor?”
“No. But I think he’ll be okay. Want to play chess until he come to?”
“I have to work on my paper.”
“Oh, come on. You won’t get any work done with this zombie in the room. Look at how distracting he is.”
“He’s like a lava lamp. You’re right. I can’t work with him here. Then again, I probably couldn’t play a good game of chess with him here, either.”
“Want to put him in the closet?”
“Sure.”
Josef opened the closet door. He and Mason then lifted Arend into the closet and stood him against the wall and between two coats. Josef reached up to the top shelf and brought down the chessboard. Arend stared. Mason closed the closet door.
Mason played white. Josef played black. The sun sank a noticeable distance in the sky and the shadows lengthened across the wall. The yellow tree swayed in a gentle breeze.
TBC...
W.