::Screened from the Authorities::
It's been a while since I updated.
Have been busy doing other, more important things. Sad that I have a life, isn't it?
Wrath
1. Who did you last get angry with? God. Omnipotence and omniscience should always go hand in hand with perfection and sadism. I feel slighted.
2. What is your weapon of choice? Cleverness employed from behind someone’s back.
3. Would you hit a member of the opposite sex? No.
4. What is your pet peeve? Anal-retentive perfectionists incapable of dealing with someone who doesn’t care to waste their time rereading every sentence they type fifty times. Freehand’s better than typing for that specific reason, anyways, but I'd rather not scan every comment.
Sloth
1. What is one thing you're supposed to do daily but don't? Care.
2. Name a person you've been meaning to contact, but haven't? I haven’t been meaning to contact anyone recently.
3. What is the last lame excuse you made? “I’d love to talk to you, but my yucca plant is unwell.”
4. When was the last time you worked out? This afternoon.
Gluttony
1. What is your overpriced yuppie beverage of choice? I haven’t got one.
2. Meat eater? Certainly.
3. What is the greatest amount of alcohol you've had in one sitting/outing/event? I don’t know if I’d remember that.
4. Have you ever looked at a small house, pet, or child and thought "lunch?" Darwin’s lunch. I don’t like the taste of brick, rat-poodle, or crotch-monkey.
Lust
1. How many people have you seen naked (not counting friends/movies/family)? I’m going to have to stick with “many”.
2. How many people have seen YOU naked (not counting physicians/family)? The same answer goes here here.
3. Have you "done it"? Done what? The laundry? God, if you can’t say “fucked/been fucked”, I’m not going to bother answering the question.
4. What is your favorite body part on a person of the opposite sex? Oh, that WOULD be telling.
Greed.
1. What's your guilty pleasure store? I buy from our own store, sometimes. It's funding the people I hold distaste for, I am aware, but...
2. If you had 1 million dollars, what would you do with it? Either it’d end up in a bank, or in the stock market.
3. Would you rather be rich, or famous? Fame is everything. Infamy is even better.
4. Would you accept a boring job if it meant you would make megabucks? Apparently, through my birth I already have.
Pride
1. What's one thing you have done that you're most proud of? …
2. What thing would you like to accomplish in your life? My secret grand ambition, my endgame? That WOULD be telling.
3. Do you get annoyed by coming in second place? Ew. Horribly.
4. Have you ever entered a contest of skill, knowing you were of much higher skill than all the other competitors? Shooting fish in a barrel is fun, yes.
Envy
1. What item of your friends would you most want to have for your own? Sanity I don’t need their cheap items of little value. And I assume, of course, by friends “enemies” is meant.
2. Who would you want to go on "Trading Spaces" with? Let them redecorate-I’m sorry; that’s sacrilege.
3. If you could be anyone else in the world, who would you be? Myself, though I suddenly feel the urge to answer “Bill Gates”…odd.
4. Have you ever been cheated on? As if that were plausible.
Dear Santa...
Dear Santa,
This year I've been busy!
Last month I had a shoot-out with rival gang lords on the 5 near LA (-76 points). Last Saturday I stole crytobefound's purse (-30 points). Last Thursday I gave __sarak a wet willie, then I took it back (-5 points). In January I committed genocide... Sorry about that, grey_shade (-5000 points). Last Monday I ruled Asscrackistan as a cruel and heartless dictator (-700 points).
Overall, I've been naughty (-5811 points). For Christmas I deserve a lump of coal!
Sincerely,
master_sigurd
Hn. I'll take these things one by one. A shoot-out? Not at all like me.
Stealing purses? Doubtful.
I don't even know what a wet willie IS, nor do I want to.
Genocide is a low dig, as is the accusation of dictatorhood.
"Asscrackistan" is crude and seems to be implying something.
And after all that, all I deserve is a lump of coal...
Have been busy doing other, more important things. Sad that I have a life, isn't it?
Wrath
1. Who did you last get angry with? God. Omnipotence and omniscience should always go hand in hand with perfection and sadism. I feel slighted.
2. What is your weapon of choice? Cleverness employed from behind someone’s back.
3. Would you hit a member of the opposite sex? No.
4. What is your pet peeve? Anal-retentive perfectionists incapable of dealing with someone who doesn’t care to waste their time rereading every sentence they type fifty times. Freehand’s better than typing for that specific reason, anyways, but I'd rather not scan every comment.
Sloth
1. What is one thing you're supposed to do daily but don't? Care.
2. Name a person you've been meaning to contact, but haven't? I haven’t been meaning to contact anyone recently.
3. What is the last lame excuse you made? “I’d love to talk to you, but my yucca plant is unwell.”
4. When was the last time you worked out? This afternoon.
Gluttony
1. What is your overpriced yuppie beverage of choice? I haven’t got one.
2. Meat eater? Certainly.
3. What is the greatest amount of alcohol you've had in one sitting/outing/event? I don’t know if I’d remember that.
4. Have you ever looked at a small house, pet, or child and thought "lunch?" Darwin’s lunch. I don’t like the taste of brick, rat-poodle, or crotch-monkey.
Lust
1. How many people have you seen naked (not counting friends/movies/family)? I’m going to have to stick with “many”.
2. How many people have seen YOU naked (not counting physicians/family)? The same answer goes here here.
3. Have you "done it"? Done what? The laundry? God, if you can’t say “fucked/been fucked”, I’m not going to bother answering the question.
4. What is your favorite body part on a person of the opposite sex? Oh, that WOULD be telling.
Greed.
1. What's your guilty pleasure store? I buy from our own store, sometimes. It's funding the people I hold distaste for, I am aware, but...
2. If you had 1 million dollars, what would you do with it? Either it’d end up in a bank, or in the stock market.
3. Would you rather be rich, or famous? Fame is everything. Infamy is even better.
4. Would you accept a boring job if it meant you would make megabucks? Apparently, through my birth I already have.
Pride
1. What's one thing you have done that you're most proud of? …
2. What thing would you like to accomplish in your life? My secret grand ambition, my endgame? That WOULD be telling.
3. Do you get annoyed by coming in second place? Ew. Horribly.
4. Have you ever entered a contest of skill, knowing you were of much higher skill than all the other competitors? Shooting fish in a barrel is fun, yes.
Envy
1. What item of your friends would you most want to have for your own? Sanity I don’t need their cheap items of little value. And I assume, of course, by friends “enemies” is meant.
2. Who would you want to go on "Trading Spaces" with? Let them redecorate-I’m sorry; that’s sacrilege.
3. If you could be anyone else in the world, who would you be? Myself, though I suddenly feel the urge to answer “Bill Gates”…odd.
4. Have you ever been cheated on? As if that were plausible.
Dear Santa...
Dear Santa,
This year I've been busy!
Last month I had a shoot-out with rival gang lords on the 5 near LA (-76 points). Last Saturday I stole crytobefound's purse (-30 points). Last Thursday I gave __sarak a wet willie, then I took it back (-5 points). In January I committed genocide... Sorry about that, grey_shade (-5000 points). Last Monday I ruled Asscrackistan as a cruel and heartless dictator (-700 points).
Overall, I've been naughty (-5811 points). For Christmas I deserve a lump of coal!
Sincerely,
master_sigurd
Hn. I'll take these things one by one. A shoot-out? Not at all like me.
Stealing purses? Doubtful.
I don't even know what a wet willie IS, nor do I want to.
Genocide is a low dig, as is the accusation of dictatorhood.
"Asscrackistan" is crude and seems to be implying something.
And after all that, all I deserve is a lump of coal...