Emptiness
I'm blue and whiny so don't read on if you are going to unload on me for whining.
So I'm laying around thinking about plans for tonight and in creep dark thoughts. I will lead with I would never kill myself. Just thinking of a party that I've been invited to and of the people showing I don't think many actually like me. Beyond that I know a few have a strong dislike for me and one will likely want to slap me in front of everyone. So wondering down this line of thought I'm now curious if I were simply gone one day, like leaved the city and cut off lies with everyone what would happen. I'm pretty sure most of the people I call friends would not really feel any loss. I need to turn myself around, but it's hard when you don't feel like you are really connected to many people.
So now I'm not sure if I'll hit this party. I only got a second hand invite, so I'm not really sure I'm invited. Guess I'll try and motivate myself to get out and live, and worst case I get into a fight. Last fight I was in I got a concussion. Never get really drunk in a small town when you tend to act like a prick when you drink.
So I'm laying around thinking about plans for tonight and in creep dark thoughts. I will lead with I would never kill myself. Just thinking of a party that I've been invited to and of the people showing I don't think many actually like me. Beyond that I know a few have a strong dislike for me and one will likely want to slap me in front of everyone. So wondering down this line of thought I'm now curious if I were simply gone one day, like leaved the city and cut off lies with everyone what would happen. I'm pretty sure most of the people I call friends would not really feel any loss. I need to turn myself around, but it's hard when you don't feel like you are really connected to many people.
So now I'm not sure if I'll hit this party. I only got a second hand invite, so I'm not really sure I'm invited. Guess I'll try and motivate myself to get out and live, and worst case I get into a fight. Last fight I was in I got a concussion. Never get really drunk in a small town when you tend to act like a prick when you drink.