In your heart (final chapter)
Title: In your heart
Author: MatsuAurore
Beta: Andreja1989 thank you for your work ^.^
Pairing: Ohmiya, Juntoshi (friendship)
Genre: Au, drama, fantasy, romance, angst
Disclaimer: Only own the plot but Ohmiya owns each other xD
Summary: Two pasts, two painful stories. They are the same but yet so different. Nino, a big arrogant idol and Ohno a kind and shy amazing dancer. They live their lives but when Ohno meets the younger, the sleepy man will discover Nino’s dark past that the idol wanted to forget. One day Nino gets stuck in Ohno’s mind and he discovers that maybe the dancer is the only person who can really understand his pain. Maybe Ohno’s eternal sleepy smile hides a dark secret.
Final chapter: Don't forget me, I need you
Ohno blinked, he opened his eyes with a groan and jumped, seeing a man in white next to him.
"Ah, Ohno-san, you're awake." The man said with a slight smile.
"What happened, where I am?" Ohno asked, lost.
"You drank too much alcohol yesterday night and you fainted, your friend found you unconscious, and without him, you would have been dead." The doctor explained. "You need some rest, you must sleep, now." The doctor bowed and left the room.
Ohno sighed but soon jumped, remembering he wasn't alone.
"Nino?"
No answer.
"Nino, are you all right?" Ohno started to panic because of the silence. "Nino, please, I know you hate me but give me an answer!" Ohno asked really starting to panic this time. But there was still no answer; it was as if Nino had disappeared from his mind.
"Nino... Kazu, please, answer me!" Ohno whispered, tears rolling on his cheeks.
"You speak with yourself, now?" A voice asked.
"Jun?" Ohno jumped, seeing his friend moving toward him.
"The doctor called me, I'm happy you're awake, don't ever do that again!" Jun said with a serious tone. The younger sat next to him and hugged him tightly in his arms. Ohno tightened his grip around Jun when he felt his tears falling on his neck. Jun was so sensitive and knowing he had hurt him made Ohno felt twice more guilty.
"I'm so sorry, Jun." Ohno lowered his eyes, ashamed. He didn’t know what to say, there was nothing to say... Suddenly, Ohno pulled his friend away, remembering what was happening. "Jun, Nino has disappeared!"
"Eh, who is Nino?" Jun asked with a strange look on his face.
Ohno related him the whole story and his friend froze when he learnt it. The older knew maybe his best friend would think he was insane but he was too worried for Nino to think about the consequences, the most important for the moment was Nino and only Nino.
"You think I'm sick, ne?" Ohno whispered avoiding Jun's eyes. The younger looked at him for a moment before smiling kindly, stroking Ohno’s cheek.
"It's really weird and maybe I'm stupid but I trust you. You're my best friend, Toshi, I know you would never lie to me and I know you’re not insane." Jun said softly after a while.
"Thank you, Junny." Ohno put his hand on the younger's.
"You seem sad." Jun whispered when he saw the tears shining in his friend’s eyes.
"Yes, I am. At the beginning, I hated this situation, thinking Nino was just a rich, arrogant and selfish brat but after, I changed my mind."
"Why?"
"I've discovered he only suffered and had the same grief as me. Kazu was alone and needed someone who could understand him. In reality, he's an amazing man. He is arrogant, brat and selfish but he is kind and sensitive, we learnt to know each other during these five months and I think I..." Ohno stooped, blushing deeply.
"Yes?"
"I think I love him." Ohno looked away, blushing.
"Toshi, look at me." But Ohno didn’t raised his eyes. He couldn’t confront Jun’s, shame killing his heart.
"Why are you ashamed?" Jun grabbed Satoshi's chin and turned his face toward him but jumped when he saw the tears rolling down his cheeks. "Why are you crying?"
"I'm sorry, Jun." Ohno sobbed, burying his face in the younger’s neck who didn’t react, too surprised by this reaction.
"Why?"
"Because I fell in love with someone else, I betrayed Sho and you, I..."
"Don't say these horrible things. Sho would be very happy if he knew you were able to love someone else and me too. You've suffered enough, Toshi, you deserve happiness, and you deserve someone who'll love you as much as my brother." Jun hugged his friend tightly against him, stroking his hair lovingly. "I'm so happy you've found him."
"Thank you, Jun. I miss him so much." Jun put his forehead against Ohno's, kissing the tip of his nose and the older smiled through his tears.
"I know. Nino is alive." Jun whispered making his friend jump.
"Eh, how? Why? Where he is?!" Ohno asked quickly, panicking. The younger smiled and put his hands on his shoulders to calm him down.
"He woke up and left the hospital two days ago."
"Why? He didn't want to see me?!"
"I don't know." Jun lied. In fact, he knew why Nino had left without a word but he had made a promise and couldn’t betray Nino by saying the truth.
****
Ohno left the hospital the next day. His head was a terrible mess; lots of questions were turning and turning in his mind. Why did Nino leave without saying a word? He said he loved him, so why? Why wasn't he next to him? Ohno missed the young idol so much! He missed his presence, his teases, and his laughs. Ohno wanted to see him but didn't want to bother the busy idol. It was like five months ago. Satoshi felt lonely, sad and empty. The food was insipid and the days darks. Ohno was drawing every day, building a wall of silence between the world and him, ignoring this little voice in his head who was saying that he had to move on and forget. But how could he forget? How could he forget one more time what he went through. One day, he switched his TV on and blinked when he saw Nino. It was an emission and the young idol was singing his new song. He was so beautiful with his new hair cut, the stars shining in his eyes and this so amazing smile on his lips.
Lingering, lingering,
After the early summer rain
Undried remains of tears.
Inerasable, inerasable,
My beloved's shadow floats in the dark night.
Walking along the river banks at sunset,
With you, we lead each other along with just our smiles.
What shall we do for dinner tonight?
It was such a small, a very small and humble happiness.
Though you have died, you live submerged in my heart,
I could love someone else, but there is no one but you.
No matter how many seasons I struggle through,
I'm afraid of letting go, of letting it disappear.
I gaze at violets.
What a pretty flower,
But I know that one day it will wilt.
It is evening,
If I touch the crimson waters,
There remains the two of us on the liquid's surface.
Shadows heap on top of each other,
I'm afraid of being alone
Realizing it too late,
There is only one person on the liquid's surface.
The seed planted in my heart on that day,
Buds sprouted twenty days after,
In appearance and form it is different,
But my love is unchanged,
That gentle light
Tears were rolling down Ohno's cheeks while Nino was singing.
"What a beautiful solo, Ninomiya-san!" The caster said when the song ended.
"Thank you."Nino whispered, lowering his eyes.
"Did you write it for someone because I felt you were living this song, there was so much sadness and despair in your voice."
"Y-es, this song talks about the person I love more than anything." Tears filled Nino's eyes, he bit his lip and looked away, trying to hid his emotion.
"She is very lucky, then."
Ohno cut the TV, he couldn't bear more. He knew this song was for Yusuke, he knew Nino was singing for his ex lover and hearing that was too painful.
After some hours, Ohno took a deep breath, his jacket, his keys and left his apartment. He had taken his decision, now, he would never run away. Satoshi understood he had to move on, to take his fate in his hands again.
“I won’t abandon what is important for me anymore!” Ohno whispered, looking at his face in the mirror. The sleepy man took a deep breath and left his apartment, running like he never did before. Once arriving in front of Nino's apartment door, he rang, his hands shaking in fear.
"Hai?" A voice sang and Nino opened his door with a smile but soon, frowned. "Yes, what can I do for you?"
"Nino..." Ohno whispered.
"Excuse me, do I know you?" Nino frowned again. "Are you a fan or something else?"
"Nino, it's me, Satoshi." Ohno said, surprised. What was happening? Why Nino didn’t recognize him?
"I don't know who you are but leave if not, I’ll call the security." Nino replied coldly.
"Kazu, you can't have forgotten! Remember the fishing, the shop, the arcade. You can’t have forgotten our moments together! Please, Kazunari, tell me you are jocking!" Ohno grabbed Nino's shirt who pushed him away with a cold look on his face.
"Are you crazy, I don't know who you are, how do you dare to call me like that?! Get out." Nino snapped angrily.
"Nino, don't you remember Sho and Yusuke?!" Ohno almost cried, shocked.
"Who told you about Yusuke?! You're crazy, get out!" Nino slapped his door in front of Ohno's face who fell on the ground, crying.
“Kazu!!! Kazu, please, open the door, don’t leave me! I need you!!!” Ohno cried, his fist hitting the door with despair. “Kazu!!!” The older sobbed.
Nino lied against his door, tears rolling down his cheeks. He hated himself, he hated how Ohno seemed so desperate and sad when he told him these horrible words but he hadn’t the choice, Ohno had to forget him.
"Kazu, who was it?" Toma asked from the kitchen.
"Nobody, just a silly fan." Nino answered.
8 days earlier...
"Satoshi! Satoshi!!" Nino screamed when Ohno fell on the ground.
Then, all became dark.
***
Nino blinked. He raised his head and jumped, he wasn't in his bed. He turned his head toward the mirror and shouted. It was his face!! He touched his cheeks without believing it. It was him and no Ohno, but where was the older?
“Ninomiya-san, you're awake!" A doctor and a nurse rushed in the room and checked his vitals.
“Sorry, how long have I slept?" Nino asked.
“Five months. You must take some rest, now.” The doctor smiled.
“I haven't dreamt.” Nino whispered.
These five months were really real, it wasn’t a joke or his imagination. He was in Ohno's mind!! He told Ohno he loved him!!
“Shit," Nino gasped. "I want to see Ohno Satoshi!”
“You're weak, you can't.” The doctor protested.
“Please.” Nino implored.
“Ohno-san is unconscious.” The nurse answered.
“What?!”
“He drank too much of alcohol. I'm sorry but we don't know when he'll wake up, he can stay in coma...”
“I want to see him.” Nino ordered.
“Well.” The nurse sighed. She helped Nino to sit in a wheelchair, led him toward Ohno and left.
The younger grabbed the older’s hand, tears filling his eyes. Ohno was sleeping peacefully, as if he wasn’t here anymore.
“You must wake up, it's an order, Satoshi.” Nino sobbed, kissing his hand and stroking his chubby cheek lovingly.
“He's not awake?” A voice asked. Nino jumped and turned his head.
“Matsumoto-san.” The idol whispered.
“You know me? You're Ninomiya, Toshi talked to me about you.” Jun said, sitting next to Ohno.
“Yes...”
“Why are you here?”
“It's a long story.” Nino sighed.
“Take your time.” Jun smiled, stroking Ohno's cheek. Nino could see how much Jun loved Ohno when he saw his eyes and the tender smile on his beautiful face. Jun loved Ohno, so, maybe he could trust him. Maybe he could trust someone for one time since Yu’s death.
“You won’t believe me...”
“We'll see.” The younger smiled kindly.
Nino sighed and began his story. As expected, Jun stared at him with a strange look but never cut him off when the older told him the truth.
“It's an odd story but I feel I can trust you, you’re not a liar.” Jun said after Nino have finished.
“Thank you for believing me.” The older replied.
“So~ what will you do?”
“Satoshi drank too much and it’s my fault because I told him horrible things. I feel so guilty and disgusted of myself. I think I must disappear from his life.”
“Do you love him?” Jun asked suddenly.
“Yes, more than anything.” Nino smiled tenderly, brushing the locks of hair from Ohno's eyes.
“And you want to leave him?!”
“To be honest, before this story, I was very horrible with him. I didn't like Satoshi because he was so calm, not stressed and when I was shouting after him he didn't react while the others were afraid, that's why he annoyed me. For me he was just a boring sleepy man. Plus, he gave me advice about Yusuke's death. But when I was in his mind, I've learned to know him, I didn't think he was suffering like that and that he was so strong. I've lost my lover too that's why I understand his pain but his grief is deeper than mine. With the time, I've discovered how really Satoshi was, he is very sensitive, kind and always wants his friends to be happy. He was talking about you all the time, he told me you were amazing, kind and worried about him. He thought he doesn’t deserve a friend like you but I know it's false. Since Yusuke's death, I was a very bad person, I reproached his disappearing at everyone on earth and hated everybody but Satoshi has taught me that somewhere, there is always someone who thinks about you, someone important and worried. That's why, when you have found her; you must be strong for this important person. Despite his pain, he wanted to survive. For me, Satoshi is like that; his presence heals people's heart.” Nino whispered sadly, a tear rolling down his nose.
“You really love him, I can see it at how you look at him but I think it's a bad idea if you leave him.”
“I've no choice, he can't love me, he is too tied to Sho-chan and I was so horrible with him, I can't even forgive myself for what I said...”
“Are you sure?” Jun asked.
“Yes, it's the best thing to do. Don't tell him that, please.”
“I promise.” Jun whispered.
“Your brother was wonderful with him, I'm very sorry for his death.” Nino smiled sadly.
“Thank you, Nino.” Jun whispered before the older left.
***
Nino left the hospital three days later. When he arrived home, he sat on his couch and buried his face in his hands. Yes, it was the best thing to do…
Nino sighed and remembered the moment he passed with the artist. He missed those moments together, at thas time, they were close and Nino was laughing with his whole heart. He never thought Ohno would be so funny and kind, when he was in his mind, they were really happy together. But Ohno loved Sho too much to fall in love with him and Nino didn't want to make the older suffer because of him. For him, he didn't deserve an amazing man like Satoshi and plus, the idol didn't want to live in Sho's shadow, he refused to be a substitute.
Ohno on other hand, was suffering so much. He felt as if he had lost the second person he loved the most in his life. Nino helped him to overcome his sadness, not to forget Sho, because Ohno didn't want to forget him, but to forget his pain and to smile again, to want to live his life the morning when he was awake. With his honesty, sometimes his hard words and his kindness, Nino helped Ohno to breathe again and maybe now, to think he deserved his friends and to love and be loved again. But now, Nino was gone and nothing was counting anymore in Ohno's eyes.
Jun saw how sad Ohno was, but he couldn't do anything, thinking it was just because of Sho's death as a reason. Ohno didn't eat a lot and lost many kilos, his life was empty without his favorite bratty boy. He knew he had taken the decision of moving on but losing the person you love a second time was to painful. Sighing, he stood up and took his keys; he needed the only person who was able to comfort him.
Ohno walk to Jun's office but stopped when he heard screams.
“You have to do something, Nino!” Jun exclaimed angrily.
“I can't Jun.” Nino whispered.
“He suffers; you must tell him the truth.” The younger replied.
Ohno jumped. Why was Nino with Jun and what was the younger speaking about?
“I can't, he loves Sho!” Nino yelled hitting the desk with his punch.
“Are you stupid?!! Satoshi loves you; he told me he loves you!”
“I... can't... Toshi doesn't deserve a bastard like me...”
“Are you insensitive? You were with him during five months, you said that you loved him and now, you’re acting as if you had forgotten this story, you’re horrible!! Oh-chan is very sad, he doesn't eat anything and it's your fault! You...”
“I know that!!! What do you think?! I hate seeing Satoshi like that, I hate myself for making him suffer but I can't do anything, we can't be together, he loves Sho. I'm not a good guy, I'll make him suffer more if I'm with him and I don't want that. I love him so much to make him cry, plus, I don't want to be a substitute to Sho.” Nino screamed, tears rolling down his cheeks.
“Why? Why do you think you can't make him happy?”
“Both of us have lost our first love, it would be only consoling if we were together, Satoshi has to face his pain alone in order to live.” Nino explained.
“It's just an excuse, you don't have true arguments. You know what? You don't really think you're the bad person for him, in reality, you're afraid, afraid by your own feelings, afraid to be able to love someone else than Yusuke, you're just a coward!" Jun shouted, angrily.
“I know, but I can't... Sorry...”
“If something happens to Satoshi, I'll kill you!” Jun said, coldly.
“I love him, Jun, I love him so much.” Nino cried.
Ohno's eyes widened. Kazunari... his Kazu remembered all?! Tears began to roll down his face. He left the building and ran to his apartment. Why? Why didn't Nino want him?! Why did the idol try to make him believe he didn't remember these five past months if he really loved him? Ohno sat on his sofa and looked at Sho's picture.
"What can I do, Sho, help me!" Ohno whispered.
If Nino didn't want him, he will try to forget him. He couldn't live with Sho's memory all his life; he must be strong for his friends and him. Sighing deeply, Ohno took a box and began to put Sho's belongings inside.
“I'm sorry, Sho, but I have to live my life, and I’ll always love you, dear.” Ohno whispered, painfully.
He took all the pictures off, all the videos and clothes of his lover. It was hard, he cried a lot but he continued. After three hours, he took the box and put it in his cellar. He kept just one picture. A photo of Sho who was laughing and put it on a small desk in his living room. Tears didn't want to stop when he looked at the empty bedroom and walls but a weight left his heart, he was ready to move on, to take his life in his hands.
***
One month later...
Ohno chuckled when the man kissed his neck. The artist raised his eyes and Kei's lips met his for a wet and soft kiss. Ohno moaned through their mouths and the younger's hand slipped under his shirt but Ohno froze and pushed him away softly away.
"I'm sorry, I'm not ready." Ohno looked away, ashamed.
"Don't be, baby, I understand." Kei smiled kindly.
"Are you angry?" Ohno asked in little voice.
"No, don't worry; I'll wait for you to be ready. I love you." Kei stroked his cheek.
"Sorry." Ohno lowered his head, tears filling his eyes.
"Don't be, I said. I know you can't tell me the same words but I'll wait, I know you loved him so much."
"Thank you, Kei." Ohno smiled.
"This is better, I prefer you when you smile." Kei stood up and kissed his lover last time. "See you tomorrow, baby."
Ohno nodded and sighed. Why couldn't he let Kei make love to him?
Satoshi met Kei one month ago, at Jun's party. The young man was an old friend of Jun’s and seemed very nice. At the beginning, Ohno had ignored him, even if he thought he was gorgeous. But when Kei had seen Satoshi, he couldn't prevent his eyes turned at him and tried to flirt with him. The artist wanted to forget Nino, that's why he accepted Kei's date and a week later, they were together. Kei was very kind; he knew about Sho and Nino and didn't force Ohno, waiting for him to be ready for more. In one month they just had shared deep kisses and sometimes foreplays but not more. The older felt guilty to refuse sex with his new boyfriend but he wasn't ready, he even couldn't say "I love you" because he didn't think these words. He liked Kei, yes, but his love was still toward Nino and Ohno didn't want to lie to his lover, it would be horrible and unfair.
****
Ohno saw Kei next to the conbini and kissed his cheek.
"Satoshi, we are together for a month now, ne?" Kei asked with a strange voice.
"Hun." Ohno nodded.
"I know it's hard for you and I try to be patient but why when I make a step closer to you, I think you stand back immediately?"
"I'm sorry, if it's about yesterday..."
"It's not about it, it's just I don't feel we are real lovers. When I want to hug you, you almost push me away, when I want to kiss you, you seem ashamed, I don't know how to act with you." Kei sighed deeply.
"You're wrong, I like when you touch me." Ohno blushed.
"How can I trust you?"
"Kiss me." Ohno looked at him with serious eyes.
Kei grabbed his nape with his hand, caught his lips with despair and slipped his tongue inside Ohno's mouth who moaned and stuck their bodies together. When they broke the kiss, Kei smiled happily at Ohno but frowned when he saw his lover's pale face. Following his look, Kei saw a young man staring at them with a painful look.
"Kazu..." Ohno whispered.
"Sorry." Nino bowed and quickly ran away.
"Kazu, wait!!" Ohno shouted but Kei caught his arm.
"It's him, ne?" Ohno nodded and tears filled Kei's eyes. "Run after him, then."
"Kei..."
"It's ok, I knew I wouldn’t be able to make you forget him. You love him, right?" Kei asked painfully.
"Yes, I'm sorry." Ohno lowered his head.
"Don't be, Oh-chan, love is beautiful, catch him and promise me you'll never let him go again."
"I promise. Thank you, Kei." Ohno hugged him and left.
Ohno ran to Nino's apartment and pushed the door which was open. Nino was against the living room's wall, a beer in his hand, crying while he was drinking his can.
“You drink to forget, it's pathetic.” Ohno said.
“Shut up!” Nino snapped.
“Kazu...” Ohno whispered, moving toward him.
“Get out!” The younger cried.
“Why?”
“I don't want to see you.” Nino said, coldly.
"Is it because of Kei?"
"How can you let him touch you?!"
"I think it's not your business." Ohno replied.
“Yes, it's mine because...” But Nino stopped.
“Because what?”
“Nothing.” The younger answered, taking a big gulp of his beer.
“You have something to tell me?” Ohno asked.
“No. Live your life; it's none of my business!” Nino cried, throwing his empty can against the wall.
“Kazu...”
“Get out! And don't call me like that!” Nino cut the older.
“No.” Ohno said, coldly.
“Get out!” Nino repeated.
Ohno wrapped his arms around the younger who stiffened.
“I won’t leave you alone.” Ohno whispered.
“I don't want your pity.” Nino replied, trying to push the older away but Ohno tightened his grip.
“It's not that.”
“Why? Why don't you leave?” Nino asked, tears rolling down his face.
“Because I love you.” Ohno whispered, stroking his cheek.
“No... you can't... you...”
“I love you Kazunari, I heard you and Jun in his office, I know you remember everything.” Ohno grinned.
“But...”
“You saved me, Kazu. I suffered so much but you made me smile again. I loved these moments with you, at the clothes’ shop, the arcade, at home. I love to be with you, you're a beautiful person. Kazu, you're arrogant and brat but you're sensitive, worried and kind and that's why I fell in love with you.” The older smiled.
“No... you love Sho.” Nino protested.
“Yes. I'll always love Sho but Sho is my past, my memory and you, you are my present and my future.” Ohno answered.
“Why?” The younger asked.
“You understand my pain; you made me understand that Sho was my happy memory but that I have to live my life without him. You were right, if I hadn't asked him to come this night, he would do it anyway because he loved me. I can't blame myself for his death, he wouldn't want that. Now, I want you and nobody else, I love you, I want to be with you.” Ohno smiled.
“But...”
“For one time in your life, shut up.” Ohno said, kissing him.
Nino grabbed his hips and Ohno climbed on his lap, kissing him roughly, his teeth playing with the younger’s lower lip. Nino slipped his hands under his shirt to caress his lover's stomach, making Ohno moan and pulled his shirt off. Nino kissed his neck, biting and sucking his skin to make his claim while Ohno was whining, his hands stroking the younger's member.
“Satoshi, I love you.” The idol moaned kissing him before saying it again “I love you, I love you…” He kissed Ohno gently, on his ear, cheek and jaw line his heart fluttering as Ohno stroked his cheeks, his chest and his back.
“I love you…” Ohno whispered kissing the crook of his neck.
“Satoshi…” Nino groaned pushing him backwards onto the sofa covering him with his body and staring down into his face as his hips rolled against him, their groins rubbing together.
“I love you so much…”
“Me… Too…” Ohno’s voice came out, breathless. His hands tugged up his t-shirt, brushing softly the younger's stomach. Nino laid Ohno down, his hands running gently over every inch of the body toying gently at the nipples watching it getting hard in his hands. He took the lube and spread Ohno’s legs and then opening up the butt cheeks with his fingers staring at the twitching hole. The first finger slipped in slowly and Nino chuckled as a loud moan escaped Ohno's throat.
“Gosh… Kazu…” The second finger joined the first and Nino couldn’t wait to be inside him. He eased his fingers back out a little adding more lube and pushing in the third. He fucked Ohno hard with his fingers and the older gave a beautiful moan resounding around the room.
“Do you want me?” He asked and Ohno nodded frantically. Nino pulled his fingers out and rubbed some lube onto his cock before pushing inside the twitching, pulsating hole.
“I lo-ve…Yo-u… Ka-zu…” Ohno moaned as his lover moved inside of him, his cock just now rubbing against his spot sending slight spasms in his whole body. Nino grinned holding Ohno’s legs open even though he knew the older wanted to close them around him. He rolled his hips being careful not to go too far, not wanting to come too quickly. Ohno’s nails scratched at his back and Nino sucked at the nipple while playing with the second with his free hand.
“Kazu… Please…” Ohno whined his legs closing around him forcing the cock further inside him and making them both groan loudly. Nino’s teeth scraped the nipple and he lifted Ohno’s legs up and placed them on his shoulders. He sucked on the bottom lip for a minute rocking him backwards and forwards.
“I want to drive you as crazy as you drive me…”
“Sadist...” Ohno moaned moving his own hips leaving Nino no choice but to move with him.
“I love you… Kazu…”
Nino angled his hips carefully, with each thrust he could feel Ohno’s cock getting hard against his stomach and he slipped a hand between them gripping his neglected manhood tightly and slowly pumped it at the same time of his thrusts which were getting faster and faster. Kazunari was slowly losing control, his body was shaking as his desire to cum grew. His hips snapped in powerful thrusts and his hand pumped Ohno's cock thumbing the tip. He pushed harder, the older’s hole tightening around him as his lover cried out in pleasure. His body arched against the sofa and soon with one last powerful thrust, Nino drove himself and Ohno over the edge. Both came in perfect sync, their bodies trembling and locking together as their minds lost their reason.
Ohno laid his head on Nino’s chest while the younger was stroking his hair, lovingly.
The artist blinked because of the sun shining on his face. He raised his head and saw Nino who was sleeping under him. Satoshi smiled and stroked his cheek against Nino's chest, a wave of happiness crossing his heart. This night had been amazing and now, he knew he couldn't live without the idol. He'll always love Sho but Kazunari had captured his broken heart and for the first time since Sho's death, he felt very happy and complete. After some minutes, he stood up and walked to the kitchen to cook their breakfast.
A smile appeared on his lips when he saw the mountain of magazine on the desk in the sitting room. Nino had cut the entire article which spoke about Ohno's return in the dance world.
He took a tray and went in the bedroom. Ohno put the tray, climbed on Nino and kissed him. The younger blinked and yawned when he saw Ohno.
"Ohayou." Ohno whispered.
"O..a..you" Nino smiled sleepily.
"I've made your breakfast." Ohno answered.
"So cute." Nino teased him and Ohno pouted.
"You keep all the articles about me?"
"Yes. When I learnt about your come back, I was so happy. I've seen all your performances; you were so perfect, so beautiful, I'm proud of you." Nino blushed.
"Thank you. I followed all your performances too, you know. I cried when I heard Konseki, Yusuke would be happy you made a song for him."
"This song was for you. It talked about Yu's death, yes, but I wrote it for you." Nino stared at Ohno with a serious look.
Satoshi grinned happily, a tear escaping from his eyes and fell on Nino's cheek who smiled and wrapped his arms around Satoshi, burying the older's face in his neck. They stayed like that, savoring the contact of the other. Then, Ohno raised his head and kissed the idol who caught his face to deepen the kiss.
"Kazu~." Ohno moaned.
"I love you." Nino said.
"Me too." The dancer whispered.
Three years later...
Ohno's pov
Currently, if you asked me how my life is, I would say, it's busy. If you asked me how my days are, I would say, they are happy. If you asked me how I feel, I would say, I'm in love. If you asked me how I see the world around me, I would say, it's shining. Since our first night, three years ago, Kazu and I are very happy. He still is the annoyed brat I knew but now, he is a smiling brat who gives you joy when he sings. We live together in his apartment and when you come in the sitting room, you can see many pictures of us and our friends and on a small table, one with Sho smiling and the second with Yusuke laughing. Even if they are dead, our lives continued.
Suddenly, a scarf fell on my foot; I raised my head to see a young girl, smiling.
"Sumimasen." The girl said, shyly.
"It's okay, be careful." I smiled.
"You've changed ojii-san, did you find that person?"
I jumped. This girl... she was the same than 3 years ago, now, she probably was 8 years old. I smiled.
"Yes, you are right; I just had to wait for her."
"Sugoi! I'm very happy for you, ojii-san!" The girl exclaimed.
"Yui!" Her mother called.
"Sorry, I have to go, take care, ojii-san!"
"You too." I smiled.
She ran toward her mother who gave me a smile. Did she recognize me?
"Who was she?" Nino asked me, sitting next to me.
"An amazing girl who comforted me when I was unhappy." I answered.
"Then, I like her." Kazu smiled, kissing my cheek.
"Somewhere, there is someone who thinks about you and who will love you for what you are. You have to be patient to meet her and after that, the sun will shine again in your life. Now, I know she was right." I said, staring at Kazu in his eyes.
"Am I this person?" Nino asked.
"Yes, and you are my sunshine!" I said with a bright smile.
"I love you, Toshi, with all my soul." Nino smiled.
"More than my own life." I answered, joining our hands where two silver rings were shining, reflecting the sun.
I laid my head on his shoulder, looking at the blue sky. I could see Sho's face smiling at me and I grinned. Yes, now, I had found my sun...
Owari~
A/N : Well, finally, I updated the last chapter xD I finished this fic eight months ago but it took me a long time to post it because I thought it was a weir story and my first English’s fic ^^ Thank you for following this story and for the readers who made so lovely comments, it made me so happy thinking there were fans who liked my first Ohmiya xD See you soon for another Ohmiya <3
Author: MatsuAurore
Beta: Andreja1989 thank you for your work ^.^
Pairing: Ohmiya, Juntoshi (friendship)
Genre: Au, drama, fantasy, romance, angst
Disclaimer: Only own the plot but Ohmiya owns each other xD
Summary: Two pasts, two painful stories. They are the same but yet so different. Nino, a big arrogant idol and Ohno a kind and shy amazing dancer. They live their lives but when Ohno meets the younger, the sleepy man will discover Nino’s dark past that the idol wanted to forget. One day Nino gets stuck in Ohno’s mind and he discovers that maybe the dancer is the only person who can really understand his pain. Maybe Ohno’s eternal sleepy smile hides a dark secret.
Final chapter: Don't forget me, I need you
Ohno blinked, he opened his eyes with a groan and jumped, seeing a man in white next to him.
"Ah, Ohno-san, you're awake." The man said with a slight smile.
"What happened, where I am?" Ohno asked, lost.
"You drank too much alcohol yesterday night and you fainted, your friend found you unconscious, and without him, you would have been dead." The doctor explained. "You need some rest, you must sleep, now." The doctor bowed and left the room.
Ohno sighed but soon jumped, remembering he wasn't alone.
"Nino?"
No answer.
"Nino, are you all right?" Ohno started to panic because of the silence. "Nino, please, I know you hate me but give me an answer!" Ohno asked really starting to panic this time. But there was still no answer; it was as if Nino had disappeared from his mind.
"Nino... Kazu, please, answer me!" Ohno whispered, tears rolling on his cheeks.
"You speak with yourself, now?" A voice asked.
"Jun?" Ohno jumped, seeing his friend moving toward him.
"The doctor called me, I'm happy you're awake, don't ever do that again!" Jun said with a serious tone. The younger sat next to him and hugged him tightly in his arms. Ohno tightened his grip around Jun when he felt his tears falling on his neck. Jun was so sensitive and knowing he had hurt him made Ohno felt twice more guilty.
"I'm so sorry, Jun." Ohno lowered his eyes, ashamed. He didn’t know what to say, there was nothing to say... Suddenly, Ohno pulled his friend away, remembering what was happening. "Jun, Nino has disappeared!"
"Eh, who is Nino?" Jun asked with a strange look on his face.
Ohno related him the whole story and his friend froze when he learnt it. The older knew maybe his best friend would think he was insane but he was too worried for Nino to think about the consequences, the most important for the moment was Nino and only Nino.
"You think I'm sick, ne?" Ohno whispered avoiding Jun's eyes. The younger looked at him for a moment before smiling kindly, stroking Ohno’s cheek.
"It's really weird and maybe I'm stupid but I trust you. You're my best friend, Toshi, I know you would never lie to me and I know you’re not insane." Jun said softly after a while.
"Thank you, Junny." Ohno put his hand on the younger's.
"You seem sad." Jun whispered when he saw the tears shining in his friend’s eyes.
"Yes, I am. At the beginning, I hated this situation, thinking Nino was just a rich, arrogant and selfish brat but after, I changed my mind."
"Why?"
"I've discovered he only suffered and had the same grief as me. Kazu was alone and needed someone who could understand him. In reality, he's an amazing man. He is arrogant, brat and selfish but he is kind and sensitive, we learnt to know each other during these five months and I think I..." Ohno stooped, blushing deeply.
"Yes?"
"I think I love him." Ohno looked away, blushing.
"Toshi, look at me." But Ohno didn’t raised his eyes. He couldn’t confront Jun’s, shame killing his heart.
"Why are you ashamed?" Jun grabbed Satoshi's chin and turned his face toward him but jumped when he saw the tears rolling down his cheeks. "Why are you crying?"
"I'm sorry, Jun." Ohno sobbed, burying his face in the younger’s neck who didn’t react, too surprised by this reaction.
"Why?"
"Because I fell in love with someone else, I betrayed Sho and you, I..."
"Don't say these horrible things. Sho would be very happy if he knew you were able to love someone else and me too. You've suffered enough, Toshi, you deserve happiness, and you deserve someone who'll love you as much as my brother." Jun hugged his friend tightly against him, stroking his hair lovingly. "I'm so happy you've found him."
"Thank you, Jun. I miss him so much." Jun put his forehead against Ohno's, kissing the tip of his nose and the older smiled through his tears.
"I know. Nino is alive." Jun whispered making his friend jump.
"Eh, how? Why? Where he is?!" Ohno asked quickly, panicking. The younger smiled and put his hands on his shoulders to calm him down.
"He woke up and left the hospital two days ago."
"Why? He didn't want to see me?!"
"I don't know." Jun lied. In fact, he knew why Nino had left without a word but he had made a promise and couldn’t betray Nino by saying the truth.
****
Ohno left the hospital the next day. His head was a terrible mess; lots of questions were turning and turning in his mind. Why did Nino leave without saying a word? He said he loved him, so why? Why wasn't he next to him? Ohno missed the young idol so much! He missed his presence, his teases, and his laughs. Ohno wanted to see him but didn't want to bother the busy idol. It was like five months ago. Satoshi felt lonely, sad and empty. The food was insipid and the days darks. Ohno was drawing every day, building a wall of silence between the world and him, ignoring this little voice in his head who was saying that he had to move on and forget. But how could he forget? How could he forget one more time what he went through. One day, he switched his TV on and blinked when he saw Nino. It was an emission and the young idol was singing his new song. He was so beautiful with his new hair cut, the stars shining in his eyes and this so amazing smile on his lips.
Lingering, lingering,
After the early summer rain
Undried remains of tears.
Inerasable, inerasable,
My beloved's shadow floats in the dark night.
Walking along the river banks at sunset,
With you, we lead each other along with just our smiles.
What shall we do for dinner tonight?
It was such a small, a very small and humble happiness.
Though you have died, you live submerged in my heart,
I could love someone else, but there is no one but you.
No matter how many seasons I struggle through,
I'm afraid of letting go, of letting it disappear.
I gaze at violets.
What a pretty flower,
But I know that one day it will wilt.
It is evening,
If I touch the crimson waters,
There remains the two of us on the liquid's surface.
Shadows heap on top of each other,
I'm afraid of being alone
Realizing it too late,
There is only one person on the liquid's surface.
The seed planted in my heart on that day,
Buds sprouted twenty days after,
In appearance and form it is different,
But my love is unchanged,
That gentle light
Tears were rolling down Ohno's cheeks while Nino was singing.
"What a beautiful solo, Ninomiya-san!" The caster said when the song ended.
"Thank you."Nino whispered, lowering his eyes.
"Did you write it for someone because I felt you were living this song, there was so much sadness and despair in your voice."
"Y-es, this song talks about the person I love more than anything." Tears filled Nino's eyes, he bit his lip and looked away, trying to hid his emotion.
"She is very lucky, then."
Ohno cut the TV, he couldn't bear more. He knew this song was for Yusuke, he knew Nino was singing for his ex lover and hearing that was too painful.
After some hours, Ohno took a deep breath, his jacket, his keys and left his apartment. He had taken his decision, now, he would never run away. Satoshi understood he had to move on, to take his fate in his hands again.
“I won’t abandon what is important for me anymore!” Ohno whispered, looking at his face in the mirror. The sleepy man took a deep breath and left his apartment, running like he never did before. Once arriving in front of Nino's apartment door, he rang, his hands shaking in fear.
"Hai?" A voice sang and Nino opened his door with a smile but soon, frowned. "Yes, what can I do for you?"
"Nino..." Ohno whispered.
"Excuse me, do I know you?" Nino frowned again. "Are you a fan or something else?"
"Nino, it's me, Satoshi." Ohno said, surprised. What was happening? Why Nino didn’t recognize him?
"I don't know who you are but leave if not, I’ll call the security." Nino replied coldly.
"Kazu, you can't have forgotten! Remember the fishing, the shop, the arcade. You can’t have forgotten our moments together! Please, Kazunari, tell me you are jocking!" Ohno grabbed Nino's shirt who pushed him away with a cold look on his face.
"Are you crazy, I don't know who you are, how do you dare to call me like that?! Get out." Nino snapped angrily.
"Nino, don't you remember Sho and Yusuke?!" Ohno almost cried, shocked.
"Who told you about Yusuke?! You're crazy, get out!" Nino slapped his door in front of Ohno's face who fell on the ground, crying.
“Kazu!!! Kazu, please, open the door, don’t leave me! I need you!!!” Ohno cried, his fist hitting the door with despair. “Kazu!!!” The older sobbed.
Nino lied against his door, tears rolling down his cheeks. He hated himself, he hated how Ohno seemed so desperate and sad when he told him these horrible words but he hadn’t the choice, Ohno had to forget him.
"Kazu, who was it?" Toma asked from the kitchen.
"Nobody, just a silly fan." Nino answered.
8 days earlier...
"Satoshi! Satoshi!!" Nino screamed when Ohno fell on the ground.
Then, all became dark.
***
Nino blinked. He raised his head and jumped, he wasn't in his bed. He turned his head toward the mirror and shouted. It was his face!! He touched his cheeks without believing it. It was him and no Ohno, but where was the older?
“Ninomiya-san, you're awake!" A doctor and a nurse rushed in the room and checked his vitals.
“Sorry, how long have I slept?" Nino asked.
“Five months. You must take some rest, now.” The doctor smiled.
“I haven't dreamt.” Nino whispered.
These five months were really real, it wasn’t a joke or his imagination. He was in Ohno's mind!! He told Ohno he loved him!!
“Shit," Nino gasped. "I want to see Ohno Satoshi!”
“You're weak, you can't.” The doctor protested.
“Please.” Nino implored.
“Ohno-san is unconscious.” The nurse answered.
“What?!”
“He drank too much of alcohol. I'm sorry but we don't know when he'll wake up, he can stay in coma...”
“I want to see him.” Nino ordered.
“Well.” The nurse sighed. She helped Nino to sit in a wheelchair, led him toward Ohno and left.
The younger grabbed the older’s hand, tears filling his eyes. Ohno was sleeping peacefully, as if he wasn’t here anymore.
“You must wake up, it's an order, Satoshi.” Nino sobbed, kissing his hand and stroking his chubby cheek lovingly.
“He's not awake?” A voice asked. Nino jumped and turned his head.
“Matsumoto-san.” The idol whispered.
“You know me? You're Ninomiya, Toshi talked to me about you.” Jun said, sitting next to Ohno.
“Yes...”
“Why are you here?”
“It's a long story.” Nino sighed.
“Take your time.” Jun smiled, stroking Ohno's cheek. Nino could see how much Jun loved Ohno when he saw his eyes and the tender smile on his beautiful face. Jun loved Ohno, so, maybe he could trust him. Maybe he could trust someone for one time since Yu’s death.
“You won’t believe me...”
“We'll see.” The younger smiled kindly.
Nino sighed and began his story. As expected, Jun stared at him with a strange look but never cut him off when the older told him the truth.
“It's an odd story but I feel I can trust you, you’re not a liar.” Jun said after Nino have finished.
“Thank you for believing me.” The older replied.
“So~ what will you do?”
“Satoshi drank too much and it’s my fault because I told him horrible things. I feel so guilty and disgusted of myself. I think I must disappear from his life.”
“Do you love him?” Jun asked suddenly.
“Yes, more than anything.” Nino smiled tenderly, brushing the locks of hair from Ohno's eyes.
“And you want to leave him?!”
“To be honest, before this story, I was very horrible with him. I didn't like Satoshi because he was so calm, not stressed and when I was shouting after him he didn't react while the others were afraid, that's why he annoyed me. For me he was just a boring sleepy man. Plus, he gave me advice about Yusuke's death. But when I was in his mind, I've learned to know him, I didn't think he was suffering like that and that he was so strong. I've lost my lover too that's why I understand his pain but his grief is deeper than mine. With the time, I've discovered how really Satoshi was, he is very sensitive, kind and always wants his friends to be happy. He was talking about you all the time, he told me you were amazing, kind and worried about him. He thought he doesn’t deserve a friend like you but I know it's false. Since Yusuke's death, I was a very bad person, I reproached his disappearing at everyone on earth and hated everybody but Satoshi has taught me that somewhere, there is always someone who thinks about you, someone important and worried. That's why, when you have found her; you must be strong for this important person. Despite his pain, he wanted to survive. For me, Satoshi is like that; his presence heals people's heart.” Nino whispered sadly, a tear rolling down his nose.
“You really love him, I can see it at how you look at him but I think it's a bad idea if you leave him.”
“I've no choice, he can't love me, he is too tied to Sho-chan and I was so horrible with him, I can't even forgive myself for what I said...”
“Are you sure?” Jun asked.
“Yes, it's the best thing to do. Don't tell him that, please.”
“I promise.” Jun whispered.
“Your brother was wonderful with him, I'm very sorry for his death.” Nino smiled sadly.
“Thank you, Nino.” Jun whispered before the older left.
***
Nino left the hospital three days later. When he arrived home, he sat on his couch and buried his face in his hands. Yes, it was the best thing to do…
Nino sighed and remembered the moment he passed with the artist. He missed those moments together, at thas time, they were close and Nino was laughing with his whole heart. He never thought Ohno would be so funny and kind, when he was in his mind, they were really happy together. But Ohno loved Sho too much to fall in love with him and Nino didn't want to make the older suffer because of him. For him, he didn't deserve an amazing man like Satoshi and plus, the idol didn't want to live in Sho's shadow, he refused to be a substitute.
Ohno on other hand, was suffering so much. He felt as if he had lost the second person he loved the most in his life. Nino helped him to overcome his sadness, not to forget Sho, because Ohno didn't want to forget him, but to forget his pain and to smile again, to want to live his life the morning when he was awake. With his honesty, sometimes his hard words and his kindness, Nino helped Ohno to breathe again and maybe now, to think he deserved his friends and to love and be loved again. But now, Nino was gone and nothing was counting anymore in Ohno's eyes.
Jun saw how sad Ohno was, but he couldn't do anything, thinking it was just because of Sho's death as a reason. Ohno didn't eat a lot and lost many kilos, his life was empty without his favorite bratty boy. He knew he had taken the decision of moving on but losing the person you love a second time was to painful. Sighing, he stood up and took his keys; he needed the only person who was able to comfort him.
Ohno walk to Jun's office but stopped when he heard screams.
“You have to do something, Nino!” Jun exclaimed angrily.
“I can't Jun.” Nino whispered.
“He suffers; you must tell him the truth.” The younger replied.
Ohno jumped. Why was Nino with Jun and what was the younger speaking about?
“I can't, he loves Sho!” Nino yelled hitting the desk with his punch.
“Are you stupid?!! Satoshi loves you; he told me he loves you!”
“I... can't... Toshi doesn't deserve a bastard like me...”
“Are you insensitive? You were with him during five months, you said that you loved him and now, you’re acting as if you had forgotten this story, you’re horrible!! Oh-chan is very sad, he doesn't eat anything and it's your fault! You...”
“I know that!!! What do you think?! I hate seeing Satoshi like that, I hate myself for making him suffer but I can't do anything, we can't be together, he loves Sho. I'm not a good guy, I'll make him suffer more if I'm with him and I don't want that. I love him so much to make him cry, plus, I don't want to be a substitute to Sho.” Nino screamed, tears rolling down his cheeks.
“Why? Why do you think you can't make him happy?”
“Both of us have lost our first love, it would be only consoling if we were together, Satoshi has to face his pain alone in order to live.” Nino explained.
“It's just an excuse, you don't have true arguments. You know what? You don't really think you're the bad person for him, in reality, you're afraid, afraid by your own feelings, afraid to be able to love someone else than Yusuke, you're just a coward!" Jun shouted, angrily.
“I know, but I can't... Sorry...”
“If something happens to Satoshi, I'll kill you!” Jun said, coldly.
“I love him, Jun, I love him so much.” Nino cried.
Ohno's eyes widened. Kazunari... his Kazu remembered all?! Tears began to roll down his face. He left the building and ran to his apartment. Why? Why didn't Nino want him?! Why did the idol try to make him believe he didn't remember these five past months if he really loved him? Ohno sat on his sofa and looked at Sho's picture.
"What can I do, Sho, help me!" Ohno whispered.
If Nino didn't want him, he will try to forget him. He couldn't live with Sho's memory all his life; he must be strong for his friends and him. Sighing deeply, Ohno took a box and began to put Sho's belongings inside.
“I'm sorry, Sho, but I have to live my life, and I’ll always love you, dear.” Ohno whispered, painfully.
He took all the pictures off, all the videos and clothes of his lover. It was hard, he cried a lot but he continued. After three hours, he took the box and put it in his cellar. He kept just one picture. A photo of Sho who was laughing and put it on a small desk in his living room. Tears didn't want to stop when he looked at the empty bedroom and walls but a weight left his heart, he was ready to move on, to take his life in his hands.
***
One month later...
Ohno chuckled when the man kissed his neck. The artist raised his eyes and Kei's lips met his for a wet and soft kiss. Ohno moaned through their mouths and the younger's hand slipped under his shirt but Ohno froze and pushed him away softly away.
"I'm sorry, I'm not ready." Ohno looked away, ashamed.
"Don't be, baby, I understand." Kei smiled kindly.
"Are you angry?" Ohno asked in little voice.
"No, don't worry; I'll wait for you to be ready. I love you." Kei stroked his cheek.
"Sorry." Ohno lowered his head, tears filling his eyes.
"Don't be, I said. I know you can't tell me the same words but I'll wait, I know you loved him so much."
"Thank you, Kei." Ohno smiled.
"This is better, I prefer you when you smile." Kei stood up and kissed his lover last time. "See you tomorrow, baby."
Ohno nodded and sighed. Why couldn't he let Kei make love to him?
Satoshi met Kei one month ago, at Jun's party. The young man was an old friend of Jun’s and seemed very nice. At the beginning, Ohno had ignored him, even if he thought he was gorgeous. But when Kei had seen Satoshi, he couldn't prevent his eyes turned at him and tried to flirt with him. The artist wanted to forget Nino, that's why he accepted Kei's date and a week later, they were together. Kei was very kind; he knew about Sho and Nino and didn't force Ohno, waiting for him to be ready for more. In one month they just had shared deep kisses and sometimes foreplays but not more. The older felt guilty to refuse sex with his new boyfriend but he wasn't ready, he even couldn't say "I love you" because he didn't think these words. He liked Kei, yes, but his love was still toward Nino and Ohno didn't want to lie to his lover, it would be horrible and unfair.
****
Ohno saw Kei next to the conbini and kissed his cheek.
"Satoshi, we are together for a month now, ne?" Kei asked with a strange voice.
"Hun." Ohno nodded.
"I know it's hard for you and I try to be patient but why when I make a step closer to you, I think you stand back immediately?"
"I'm sorry, if it's about yesterday..."
"It's not about it, it's just I don't feel we are real lovers. When I want to hug you, you almost push me away, when I want to kiss you, you seem ashamed, I don't know how to act with you." Kei sighed deeply.
"You're wrong, I like when you touch me." Ohno blushed.
"How can I trust you?"
"Kiss me." Ohno looked at him with serious eyes.
Kei grabbed his nape with his hand, caught his lips with despair and slipped his tongue inside Ohno's mouth who moaned and stuck their bodies together. When they broke the kiss, Kei smiled happily at Ohno but frowned when he saw his lover's pale face. Following his look, Kei saw a young man staring at them with a painful look.
"Kazu..." Ohno whispered.
"Sorry." Nino bowed and quickly ran away.
"Kazu, wait!!" Ohno shouted but Kei caught his arm.
"It's him, ne?" Ohno nodded and tears filled Kei's eyes. "Run after him, then."
"Kei..."
"It's ok, I knew I wouldn’t be able to make you forget him. You love him, right?" Kei asked painfully.
"Yes, I'm sorry." Ohno lowered his head.
"Don't be, Oh-chan, love is beautiful, catch him and promise me you'll never let him go again."
"I promise. Thank you, Kei." Ohno hugged him and left.
Ohno ran to Nino's apartment and pushed the door which was open. Nino was against the living room's wall, a beer in his hand, crying while he was drinking his can.
“You drink to forget, it's pathetic.” Ohno said.
“Shut up!” Nino snapped.
“Kazu...” Ohno whispered, moving toward him.
“Get out!” The younger cried.
“Why?”
“I don't want to see you.” Nino said, coldly.
"Is it because of Kei?"
"How can you let him touch you?!"
"I think it's not your business." Ohno replied.
“Yes, it's mine because...” But Nino stopped.
“Because what?”
“Nothing.” The younger answered, taking a big gulp of his beer.
“You have something to tell me?” Ohno asked.
“No. Live your life; it's none of my business!” Nino cried, throwing his empty can against the wall.
“Kazu...”
“Get out! And don't call me like that!” Nino cut the older.
“No.” Ohno said, coldly.
“Get out!” Nino repeated.
Ohno wrapped his arms around the younger who stiffened.
“I won’t leave you alone.” Ohno whispered.
“I don't want your pity.” Nino replied, trying to push the older away but Ohno tightened his grip.
“It's not that.”
“Why? Why don't you leave?” Nino asked, tears rolling down his face.
“Because I love you.” Ohno whispered, stroking his cheek.
“No... you can't... you...”
“I love you Kazunari, I heard you and Jun in his office, I know you remember everything.” Ohno grinned.
“But...”
“You saved me, Kazu. I suffered so much but you made me smile again. I loved these moments with you, at the clothes’ shop, the arcade, at home. I love to be with you, you're a beautiful person. Kazu, you're arrogant and brat but you're sensitive, worried and kind and that's why I fell in love with you.” The older smiled.
“No... you love Sho.” Nino protested.
“Yes. I'll always love Sho but Sho is my past, my memory and you, you are my present and my future.” Ohno answered.
“Why?” The younger asked.
“You understand my pain; you made me understand that Sho was my happy memory but that I have to live my life without him. You were right, if I hadn't asked him to come this night, he would do it anyway because he loved me. I can't blame myself for his death, he wouldn't want that. Now, I want you and nobody else, I love you, I want to be with you.” Ohno smiled.
“But...”
“For one time in your life, shut up.” Ohno said, kissing him.
Nino grabbed his hips and Ohno climbed on his lap, kissing him roughly, his teeth playing with the younger’s lower lip. Nino slipped his hands under his shirt to caress his lover's stomach, making Ohno moan and pulled his shirt off. Nino kissed his neck, biting and sucking his skin to make his claim while Ohno was whining, his hands stroking the younger's member.
“Satoshi, I love you.” The idol moaned kissing him before saying it again “I love you, I love you…” He kissed Ohno gently, on his ear, cheek and jaw line his heart fluttering as Ohno stroked his cheeks, his chest and his back.
“I love you…” Ohno whispered kissing the crook of his neck.
“Satoshi…” Nino groaned pushing him backwards onto the sofa covering him with his body and staring down into his face as his hips rolled against him, their groins rubbing together.
“I love you so much…”
“Me… Too…” Ohno’s voice came out, breathless. His hands tugged up his t-shirt, brushing softly the younger's stomach. Nino laid Ohno down, his hands running gently over every inch of the body toying gently at the nipples watching it getting hard in his hands. He took the lube and spread Ohno’s legs and then opening up the butt cheeks with his fingers staring at the twitching hole. The first finger slipped in slowly and Nino chuckled as a loud moan escaped Ohno's throat.
“Gosh… Kazu…” The second finger joined the first and Nino couldn’t wait to be inside him. He eased his fingers back out a little adding more lube and pushing in the third. He fucked Ohno hard with his fingers and the older gave a beautiful moan resounding around the room.
“Do you want me?” He asked and Ohno nodded frantically. Nino pulled his fingers out and rubbed some lube onto his cock before pushing inside the twitching, pulsating hole.
“I lo-ve…Yo-u… Ka-zu…” Ohno moaned as his lover moved inside of him, his cock just now rubbing against his spot sending slight spasms in his whole body. Nino grinned holding Ohno’s legs open even though he knew the older wanted to close them around him. He rolled his hips being careful not to go too far, not wanting to come too quickly. Ohno’s nails scratched at his back and Nino sucked at the nipple while playing with the second with his free hand.
“Kazu… Please…” Ohno whined his legs closing around him forcing the cock further inside him and making them both groan loudly. Nino’s teeth scraped the nipple and he lifted Ohno’s legs up and placed them on his shoulders. He sucked on the bottom lip for a minute rocking him backwards and forwards.
“I want to drive you as crazy as you drive me…”
“Sadist...” Ohno moaned moving his own hips leaving Nino no choice but to move with him.
“I love you… Kazu…”
Nino angled his hips carefully, with each thrust he could feel Ohno’s cock getting hard against his stomach and he slipped a hand between them gripping his neglected manhood tightly and slowly pumped it at the same time of his thrusts which were getting faster and faster. Kazunari was slowly losing control, his body was shaking as his desire to cum grew. His hips snapped in powerful thrusts and his hand pumped Ohno's cock thumbing the tip. He pushed harder, the older’s hole tightening around him as his lover cried out in pleasure. His body arched against the sofa and soon with one last powerful thrust, Nino drove himself and Ohno over the edge. Both came in perfect sync, their bodies trembling and locking together as their minds lost their reason.
Ohno laid his head on Nino’s chest while the younger was stroking his hair, lovingly.
The artist blinked because of the sun shining on his face. He raised his head and saw Nino who was sleeping under him. Satoshi smiled and stroked his cheek against Nino's chest, a wave of happiness crossing his heart. This night had been amazing and now, he knew he couldn't live without the idol. He'll always love Sho but Kazunari had captured his broken heart and for the first time since Sho's death, he felt very happy and complete. After some minutes, he stood up and walked to the kitchen to cook their breakfast.
A smile appeared on his lips when he saw the mountain of magazine on the desk in the sitting room. Nino had cut the entire article which spoke about Ohno's return in the dance world.
He took a tray and went in the bedroom. Ohno put the tray, climbed on Nino and kissed him. The younger blinked and yawned when he saw Ohno.
"Ohayou." Ohno whispered.
"O..a..you" Nino smiled sleepily.
"I've made your breakfast." Ohno answered.
"So cute." Nino teased him and Ohno pouted.
"You keep all the articles about me?"
"Yes. When I learnt about your come back, I was so happy. I've seen all your performances; you were so perfect, so beautiful, I'm proud of you." Nino blushed.
"Thank you. I followed all your performances too, you know. I cried when I heard Konseki, Yusuke would be happy you made a song for him."
"This song was for you. It talked about Yu's death, yes, but I wrote it for you." Nino stared at Ohno with a serious look.
Satoshi grinned happily, a tear escaping from his eyes and fell on Nino's cheek who smiled and wrapped his arms around Satoshi, burying the older's face in his neck. They stayed like that, savoring the contact of the other. Then, Ohno raised his head and kissed the idol who caught his face to deepen the kiss.
"Kazu~." Ohno moaned.
"I love you." Nino said.
"Me too." The dancer whispered.
Three years later...
Ohno's pov
Currently, if you asked me how my life is, I would say, it's busy. If you asked me how my days are, I would say, they are happy. If you asked me how I feel, I would say, I'm in love. If you asked me how I see the world around me, I would say, it's shining. Since our first night, three years ago, Kazu and I are very happy. He still is the annoyed brat I knew but now, he is a smiling brat who gives you joy when he sings. We live together in his apartment and when you come in the sitting room, you can see many pictures of us and our friends and on a small table, one with Sho smiling and the second with Yusuke laughing. Even if they are dead, our lives continued.
Suddenly, a scarf fell on my foot; I raised my head to see a young girl, smiling.
"Sumimasen." The girl said, shyly.
"It's okay, be careful." I smiled.
"You've changed ojii-san, did you find that person?"
I jumped. This girl... she was the same than 3 years ago, now, she probably was 8 years old. I smiled.
"Yes, you are right; I just had to wait for her."
"Sugoi! I'm very happy for you, ojii-san!" The girl exclaimed.
"Yui!" Her mother called.
"Sorry, I have to go, take care, ojii-san!"
"You too." I smiled.
She ran toward her mother who gave me a smile. Did she recognize me?
"Who was she?" Nino asked me, sitting next to me.
"An amazing girl who comforted me when I was unhappy." I answered.
"Then, I like her." Kazu smiled, kissing my cheek.
"Somewhere, there is someone who thinks about you and who will love you for what you are. You have to be patient to meet her and after that, the sun will shine again in your life. Now, I know she was right." I said, staring at Kazu in his eyes.
"Am I this person?" Nino asked.
"Yes, and you are my sunshine!" I said with a bright smile.
"I love you, Toshi, with all my soul." Nino smiled.
"More than my own life." I answered, joining our hands where two silver rings were shining, reflecting the sun.
I laid my head on his shoulder, looking at the blue sky. I could see Sho's face smiling at me and I grinned. Yes, now, I had found my sun...
Owari~
A/N : Well, finally, I updated the last chapter xD I finished this fic eight months ago but it took me a long time to post it because I thought it was a weir story and my first English’s fic ^^ Thank you for following this story and for the readers who made so lovely comments, it made me so happy thinking there were fans who liked my first Ohmiya xD See you soon for another Ohmiya <3