All these things we don't tell each other (chapter 1)
Title: All these things we don't tell each other
Author: MatsuAurore
Beta: My Mokohno <3
Pairings: Yama, Ohmiya, Junba
Rating: PG-13 for now
Genre: Au, angst, drama, romance
Disclaimer: Luckily for them, only own the plot T-T
Summary: What can you do when the person you love more than your own life is just looking at your best friend? What can you do when you know this person would never see you like you see her? And if your biggest wish came true but at the same time, getting close to her also meant pushing her farther from you...
A/N: Hey Minna-san! Here is starting my new fic xD I wrote a very fragile Nino (due to a traumatic experience) because for me, despite his sharp tongue and his bratty attitude, I think our Kazu is very sensitive and needs a lot of love from his friends. That's why in this new fic, Ohchan will be the one who will try to take care of his Nino. I hope you'll enjoy this new story.
This fic is for my lovely Ohchan for his birthday <3 otanjoubi omedetou sweety <3
Chapter 1:
"I have tried in my way to be free..."
Satoshi
I looked at my best friend with disbelieving eyes. How could he know? Was it so obvious? How could he read me so easily?
Jun smiled at me and pocked my cheek. He always said he loved to touch my cheeks because they were chubby and soft. My cheeks? Chubby and soft? So weird! For me, they were... Ano... Okay, maybe a bit chubby but only a little.
"Toshi~" Jun repeated.
"What?" I asked, a bit annoyed.
"You should confess." Jun smirked, pocking my cheek once more time.
"But if he doesn't like me? And if he is straight?" I whispered, my cheeks blushing.
"Believe me, I'm sure he loves you judging how he looks at you." Jun sighed, his hand stroking his brown short hair. I really loved Jun's new haircut, even if he looked like a Korean.
"But he is Aiba's best friend and if he doesn't love me, our friendship..."
"Hey, Ma-chan told me Sho was in love with you." Jun cut me off.
"Ano, I don't know if your boyfriend's advices are really..."
"Hey, Masaki isn't an idiot and he knows Sho more than any one else." Jun frowned.
"You forget Nino." I chuckled.
"This brat..." Jun mumbled but I knew how much he loved Nino, they were very close since their childhood. "You can talk about it with Kazu but I'm sure he would say the same." Jun shrugged.
I smiled softly. I couldn't help it if I was shy. I thought I didn't deserve someone as perfect as Sho was. After all, I wasn't a very interesting guy, maybe even boring. My hobbies were drawing and fishing, sometimes singing too but how could it be interesting for someone as smart as Sho? He was so beautiful with his cute pink mouth, his muscles, the big vein of his neck and his eyes... I could look at his eyes for days, years... Sho was kind, sometimes a bit cold but when you knew him, you knew it was just an appearance. Sho always thought about his friends before himself, he acted like a mother with Jun, Aiba, Nino and me. I knew Sho for a long time...almost ten years and I think I was in love with him for five years now. I wanted to confess but I was afraid. I was afraid he would reject me. He was one of my best friends after all and I didn't want to lose him, I needed him by my side more than anything. It would kill me if he didn't want to see me anymore but I didn't know how to manage to hide my love for him anymore.
"Ohchan!! J!!! " I raised my eyes to see Nino, running toward us.
"Nino, how are you?" I smiled softly when Jun kissed his forehead and Nino almost jumped in my arms.
"Fine. As always." Nino patted my head, messing my hair. He loved doing that, he said I was looking like a teddy bear. Why all my friends were seeing me as a cute teddy bear?
"Satoshi was almost crying because of Sho." Jun smirked and I threw him a death glare. Why couldn't he keep his tongue?!
"Eh? Why?"
"Because he is in love with him and is afraid of confessing." Jun chuckled.
Nino's eyes widened and I thought I saw pain crossing his eyes but he smiled and wrapped his arm around my shoulders.
"I'll help you to confess, then." Nino sing-sang childishly.
What?! Oh no, Kazu, don't put your nose in my business, you're top skilled at manipulating and when it fails... I don't even think about it!
"I don't need your help, I'm old enough to do it myself." I pouted, knowing it was false.
"Ano, Satoshi, you've been in love with Sho for five years, do you think you would confess before your 90 years?" Jun teased me and I pouted again.
"Sato-chan is such a baby, mama Sho didn't do his work well." Nino smirked.
"You two are boring!" I mumbled and left.
"Satoshi, wait!" Nino grabbed my arm.
"What?" I sighed.
"I was serious. Sho is my friend, I’ve known him for a long time and I'm sure he loves you too, I'll help you." Nino grinned.
Oh my god, when Nino was making this smile, it wasn't worth to try to make him change his mind, this brat was too stubborn.
"But..."
"Trust me, teddy, before tomorrow you'll be dating Shoko." Nino chuckled and left me to join Jun who was waiting for their usual afternoon.
Every Saturday, they went to Nino's apartment to play at his games and spend the week end together. Of course, Aiba hated that and it often finished by an argument between him and Jun but I knew Junny couldn't help it. Nino and him were orphans and had grown up together like two brothers. They were living in the same apartment for ten years and when Jun left Nino to live with Masaki, Kazu didn't bear it, even if he didn't say anything, I could see how much sad he was and had lost weight. I often wondered if Jun and Nino ever slept together, they were so close... Maybe...
Nino was a singer, Jun was a mannequin, Aiba owned a bar, Sho was a lawyer and me... I was a dancer. I met them at college and since then, we were the best friends of the world. It was our lives, it was our happiness. Since this day...
****
Kazu
I sighed when my car crashed into the wall, J screaming in joy. I couldn't focus on the game, my mind was too far.
"Hey, Kazu, what's wrong." Jun looked at me worriedly and I shrugged.
"Nothing, just tired." Jun sighed and put his joystick on the ground. He sat behind me and hugged me, putting his chin on my shoulder.
"Liar. I know when you are lying to me." Okay, maybe he knew me very well. "Is it because of this afternoon, dear?"
"No, of course not." I replied, blushing.
"You're a very bad liar, Kaz'." Jun kissed my cheek tenderly.
"No, it's just you know me too well." I chuckled, kissing his hand.
"Is it because of Satoshi?"
I froze. Why could he always read my heart so easily?
"No." I replied stubbornly knowing it was useless to lie to him.
"Tell me, Kazu, I hate seeing you so sad." Jun whispered, sadness resounding in his voice. I lied my head against his shoulder and sighed.
"I wish I could die."
"Oi, don't say stupid things like that!" Jun smacked my head, a bit angry or sad, I didn't know what he was feeling.
"But..."
"You want to help Satoshi even if you love him?"
"How..."
"I know you by heart Kazu, I can see how you are looking at him. I know you love him since This day." Jun whispered and I sighed, he really knew me well.
"Maybe I like him a little." I lied, I was completely crazy about Satoshi.
"Yes, and I'm Snow White." Jun said, sarcastically.
"Really? I always thought you were acting like a princess." I smirked and Jun smacked my head, laughing.
"Baka. I meant, you are crazy about Toshi, it's so obvious."
"Obvious?" I raised my eyebrow in disbelief.
"Kazu~ you were always sleeping with every men who crossed your way, you never had a real boyfriend instead of Mario or sometimes Pikachu and you're so kind with Satoshi. With Aiba and Sho, you're completely different, you like to tease them, to fight with them or bother them but with Satoshi, you're always so kind and soft. The brat I know doesn't exist when Ohchan is here." Jun explained.
"I don't need a psychologist." I replied, blushing at how right he was.
"Why did you propose to help Ohchan with Sho if you love him?"
"Because I want him to be happy." I shrugged, it wasn't completely false, after all, Satoshi's happiness was one of my first priority.
"I'm sure there is something else." Jun frowned.
"Maybe or maybe not, you'll see. Oya my princess Snow White." I smirked and ran in our bedroom, Jun chasing me. He pushed me on the bed and pecked my lips before we fell asleep quickly, hugging each other.
I always needed someone when I was sleeping because of my trauma and when Jun wasn't here, I slept next to Ohchan. Ohno was almost living with me during the week and we shared the same bed. He never asked me why, he knew it was because of my past but I didn't tell him. Jun was the only one who knew the dark parts of my life and I was afraid Ohno would reject me if he knew what happened to me during my childhood. I wanted to protect him and sometimes you have to lie to protect the person you loved. Ohchan made me so weak!
****
Satoshi
I groaned, hearing my phone ringing. Who did dare call me at... I looked at my clock...7 a.m.
"Go to hell." I put my pillow on my head, moaning. But my phone rang again and I grabbed it, angry.
"Satoshi?"
"No, the president of U.S! Of course it's me." I mumbled.
"Get this beautiful fluffy ass of yours to Jun's."
"You must be kidding, Kazu, it's 7 a.m, you know."
"I don't care, do it!" Nino cut the line before I could say anything.
"Shit." I mumbled.
I stood up and took a long shower and then, a big black coffee to wake me up.
When I arrived at Jun's apartment, I blinked, seeing Sho.
"Sho? What are you doing here and where are Kazu and Jun?" I asked, surprised.
"They left two minutes ago, Nino told me they would come back in five minutes." Sho said.
"I see." I nodded, taking my shoes off.
This fucking brat! I'll kill him the next time I'll see him. To start with, I'll tie him up and after I'll kill him slowly!
I sat down on the sofa and looked at Sho shyly.
"So, do you know why Kazu called us at 7 a.m?" I asked and Sho blushed.
"I... I think so, I know..."
"Really?" I raised my eyebrows. Of course I knew why but I couldn't tell Sho 'Hey, Sho, Kazu woke up us at 7 a.m to make me confess to you'. No, I really couldn't say that!
"Yes... I..." Sho stopped, his face as red as a tomato. Why was he blushing like that?
"You?" I asked. Sho sat next to me and took my hand. EH?! He took my hand?! Why?! Wait, what was happening?! EH, where was I? Was I dreaming? Was I in another world?
"You know, Satoshi, we’ve known each other for a long time now."
"Ten years, yes." I nodded with a smile, looking at our linked fingers.
"Ten years, five months and seven weeks." Sho added, blushing even more if it was possible.
"Maybe." I didn't know what he meant, I didn't understand.
"I think I might like you."
"You what?!" I almost screamed, shocked.
"I'm in love with you, Satoshi." Sho repeated, looking away.
EH?! What the fuck? Did Sho just confess to me five seconds earlier?! Did he really say he was in love with me?! EHHH?! Fuck, was it real?! Please, Kami-sama, tell me it was real! If it's a dream, I don't want to wake up! But how... No, it wasn't possible. The man I was in love with for five years just confessed to me?! Ok, keep cool, Satoshi and try to find the good answer. Fuck, why couldn't I reply although my throat wanted to scream "Yattaaaaa"?!
"Hum, ano, you haven't something to say?" Sho asked, making me jump. I completely forgot him. I was deep in my thoughts and didn't answer.
"Me... Me too." I stammered, looking away and blushing deeply.
"Really?!" Sho exclaimed, a big smile on his face.
"Wait, Nino didn't tell you?"
"No. He told me Kei wanted to ask you to date him so, I asked Nino to call you to confess first." Sho smiled softly.
"Oh." I said. This brat... I'll kill him soon!
"Was it false?" Sho raised his eyebrows.
"Hun." I nodded.
Suddenly, Sho put his hand on my cheek and I raised my eyes to look at him. His cheeks were red and when he approached his face, I closed my eyes. My heart almost stopped when my lips met his. His lips were soft and tasted like a strawberry. How many times did I dream about this day? How many times did I dream about us kissing? So many times!
I moaned in pleasure and wrapped my arms around his neck. He tightened his grip around me and slipped his tongue in my mouth. I let him dominate, enjoying the way he was stroking my cheek and my back, sometimes breaking the kiss to whisper many 'I love you' in my ear. I shivered. This moment was so perfect, so beautiful that I thought my heart would explode in the next second.
I climbed on his lap and he kissed my neck, sucking my skin to let his mark. I didn't care if he left red marks, I was his and only his and he was mine. Sho cupped my face and kissed the tip of my nose, his hand pushing away the bangs on my face.
"I love you." Sho whispered, looking at me right in my eyes.
"I love you too." I smiled and he caught my lips again, laying me down on the sofa. He kissed my neck to my chest, opening my shirt and making me moan.
"Sho." I whined, burying my face in his neck.
"I want you to be mine." Sho whispered.
"Make me yours, then." I stroked his face and he put his hand on mine, closing his eyes.
"Hum, you weren't hoping to do it on MY sofa and in MY apartment?!" A voice made us jump and we turned our heads to see Jun and Nino smirking.
"We arrived just at the good time, J. But I wanted to see Sho fucking him!" Nino whined.
"Shut up, brat!" Sho snapped angrily.
I was angry too. It wasn't because of the fact they had stopped Sho from making love to me but the intrusion. They had broken this so magic moment between Sho and me. They had broken our perfect moment. Sho looked super angry and taking my hand, he led me to the door.
"Hey, wait, where are you going?!" Nino exclaimed.
"None of your business, Nino, Satoshi is my boyfriend not yours!" Sho snapped but his face softened when he saw the hurt look on Nino's face. I knew Kazu very well and I could see the tears in his eyes before he looked away.
"I'm sorry." Nino mumbled. I ran toward him and hugged him tightly.
"No, Kazu, we are sorry, I'm sure Sho didn't mean his words." I whispered, patting his head.
"I'm sorry, Nino." Sho apologized, ashamed.
"I forgive you only if you two stay here." Nino smirked, his bratty look coming back.
How did he do to lure us so easily? I looked at Sho who sighed but nodded, giving up, Nino was the best to make you feel guilty, he was a master to get what he wanted. We sat down on the sofa, me on Sho's lap while Nino was between Jun's legs, my friend hugging him from behind as always. Their relationship was very weird, acting like a couple when Jun was dating Aiba for five years now. But I knew Jun would never cheat on Aiba, he was too in love with him and plus, Nino and him were not in love, or they were in love but as two brothers. I knew Kazu had been through lots of hard things but didn't want to tell me it. It hurt to know that but I respected his choice, maybe Nino was afraid I wouldn't understand him or would judge him. I knew he was sharing all his secrets with Jun, after all, they were like two brothers but I didn't know why it hurt me so much not being the person Nino was sharing his life with.
"So, Sho confessed?" Nino asked.
"Yes." I nodded, smiling at my new boyfriend who pecked my lips.
"Does Sho's kisses are good?" Nino smirked.
"Shut up, brat!" Sho blushed deeply making us laugh.
"Sho is a very good kisser." I said and Sho linked our fingers, kissing my temple.
"You'll tell me if he is good in bed too, ne, Ohchan?!" Nino exclaimed making Sho throw him a death look.
"It's none of your business, brat! Find yourself a boyfriend who will fuck you well!" Sho mumbled.
I didn't know if I had dreamt but I thought I had seen sadness and maybe some tears shining in Kazu's eyes when he looked up at us. Why did Nino seem so sad to see us together despite his help to make me confess? I promised myself to be more present for my Kazu, now, he looked so lonely and sad, I wanted to be here for him!
"By the way, where is Masaki?" I asked suddenly.
"He is in Chiba, his mother wanted to see him." Jun smiled sadly. I know he missed his boyfriend, they were a very close couple after all.
"Why didn't you go, then?"
"I wanted to leave him alone with his family, he needed some time with them." Jun said.
"Do you miss him?" I asked.
"Yes." Jun looked away, blushing. It was obvious he missed his boyfriend.
My eyes met Kazu's and he smiled softly with a painful look as if he knew what Jun was feeling, as if he was feeling the same for another person.
****
Kazu
It hurt. It hurt so much. Seeing the person you loved more than anything with one of your best friends was the worst. My chest was aching so much! It was as if my heart was crying too. I knew Satoshi really loved Sho and not me but I was hoping... I was hoping he would see me how I was seeing him. His kind look, his pouty lips, his chubby cheeks, his long black hair like this actor in this famous drama. I loved all these parts of him but my heart was only beating for his person. For me, Satoshi had just qualities that made him twice more beautiful than his appearance. I don't know... It was as if my world was turning around him, as Newton and his gravity's law. I needed him next to me as much as I needed Jun, maybe even more because my heart was beating only for Satoshi. Was it my fate? To love someone who would never love me back. To live for someone who was only seeing me as his best friend. God, why does life was so unfair with me? Why did I have to suffer like that? It was like an illness. Like a cancer that was eating me even more every day. Sometimes, I just wanted to die, to erase this love from my heart, to rip my heart. Why couldn't I be happy like them? Okay, sometimes I was brat, stingy and geek but I had a heart too. I was sensitive even if I hated showing it, I was sentimental even if I didn't say it. These things were reserved for the person I was in love with, it was my secret. I wished I would never go through the things of my past because today, maybe I would be different, maybe Satoshi would love me instead of Sho...
Sometimes, I just wished dying or stealing Ohno's love for Sho. I knew it was horrible and selfish but I couldn't help it, I loved Satoshi too much to be kind. If I could steal his heart, if I could make him love me back...
A/N: Ano, sorry for this weird chapter. There will be a lot of questions turning around Nino's past and his real relationship with Ohchan. In this fic, Jun and Kazu are very very close but as two brothers or twins if you prefer. Sometimes, they will kiss but it's just some pecks as parents kiss their babies, it's just a way to show their deep feelings for the other, Jun isn't cheating on Aiba and Nino is really in love with Ohchan xD I hope you liked this beginning ^^
To be continued...
Author: MatsuAurore
Beta: My Mokohno <3
Pairings: Yama, Ohmiya, Junba
Rating: PG-13 for now
Genre: Au, angst, drama, romance
Disclaimer: Luckily for them, only own the plot T-T
Summary: What can you do when the person you love more than your own life is just looking at your best friend? What can you do when you know this person would never see you like you see her? And if your biggest wish came true but at the same time, getting close to her also meant pushing her farther from you...
A/N: Hey Minna-san! Here is starting my new fic xD I wrote a very fragile Nino (due to a traumatic experience) because for me, despite his sharp tongue and his bratty attitude, I think our Kazu is very sensitive and needs a lot of love from his friends. That's why in this new fic, Ohchan will be the one who will try to take care of his Nino. I hope you'll enjoy this new story.
This fic is for my lovely Ohchan for his birthday <3 otanjoubi omedetou sweety <3
Chapter 1:
"I have tried in my way to be free..."
Satoshi
I looked at my best friend with disbelieving eyes. How could he know? Was it so obvious? How could he read me so easily?
Jun smiled at me and pocked my cheek. He always said he loved to touch my cheeks because they were chubby and soft. My cheeks? Chubby and soft? So weird! For me, they were... Ano... Okay, maybe a bit chubby but only a little.
"Toshi~" Jun repeated.
"What?" I asked, a bit annoyed.
"You should confess." Jun smirked, pocking my cheek once more time.
"But if he doesn't like me? And if he is straight?" I whispered, my cheeks blushing.
"Believe me, I'm sure he loves you judging how he looks at you." Jun sighed, his hand stroking his brown short hair. I really loved Jun's new haircut, even if he looked like a Korean.
"But he is Aiba's best friend and if he doesn't love me, our friendship..."
"Hey, Ma-chan told me Sho was in love with you." Jun cut me off.
"Ano, I don't know if your boyfriend's advices are really..."
"Hey, Masaki isn't an idiot and he knows Sho more than any one else." Jun frowned.
"You forget Nino." I chuckled.
"This brat..." Jun mumbled but I knew how much he loved Nino, they were very close since their childhood. "You can talk about it with Kazu but I'm sure he would say the same." Jun shrugged.
I smiled softly. I couldn't help it if I was shy. I thought I didn't deserve someone as perfect as Sho was. After all, I wasn't a very interesting guy, maybe even boring. My hobbies were drawing and fishing, sometimes singing too but how could it be interesting for someone as smart as Sho? He was so beautiful with his cute pink mouth, his muscles, the big vein of his neck and his eyes... I could look at his eyes for days, years... Sho was kind, sometimes a bit cold but when you knew him, you knew it was just an appearance. Sho always thought about his friends before himself, he acted like a mother with Jun, Aiba, Nino and me. I knew Sho for a long time...almost ten years and I think I was in love with him for five years now. I wanted to confess but I was afraid. I was afraid he would reject me. He was one of my best friends after all and I didn't want to lose him, I needed him by my side more than anything. It would kill me if he didn't want to see me anymore but I didn't know how to manage to hide my love for him anymore.
"Ohchan!! J!!! " I raised my eyes to see Nino, running toward us.
"Nino, how are you?" I smiled softly when Jun kissed his forehead and Nino almost jumped in my arms.
"Fine. As always." Nino patted my head, messing my hair. He loved doing that, he said I was looking like a teddy bear. Why all my friends were seeing me as a cute teddy bear?
"Satoshi was almost crying because of Sho." Jun smirked and I threw him a death glare. Why couldn't he keep his tongue?!
"Eh? Why?"
"Because he is in love with him and is afraid of confessing." Jun chuckled.
Nino's eyes widened and I thought I saw pain crossing his eyes but he smiled and wrapped his arm around my shoulders.
"I'll help you to confess, then." Nino sing-sang childishly.
What?! Oh no, Kazu, don't put your nose in my business, you're top skilled at manipulating and when it fails... I don't even think about it!
"I don't need your help, I'm old enough to do it myself." I pouted, knowing it was false.
"Ano, Satoshi, you've been in love with Sho for five years, do you think you would confess before your 90 years?" Jun teased me and I pouted again.
"Sato-chan is such a baby, mama Sho didn't do his work well." Nino smirked.
"You two are boring!" I mumbled and left.
"Satoshi, wait!" Nino grabbed my arm.
"What?" I sighed.
"I was serious. Sho is my friend, I’ve known him for a long time and I'm sure he loves you too, I'll help you." Nino grinned.
Oh my god, when Nino was making this smile, it wasn't worth to try to make him change his mind, this brat was too stubborn.
"But..."
"Trust me, teddy, before tomorrow you'll be dating Shoko." Nino chuckled and left me to join Jun who was waiting for their usual afternoon.
Every Saturday, they went to Nino's apartment to play at his games and spend the week end together. Of course, Aiba hated that and it often finished by an argument between him and Jun but I knew Junny couldn't help it. Nino and him were orphans and had grown up together like two brothers. They were living in the same apartment for ten years and when Jun left Nino to live with Masaki, Kazu didn't bear it, even if he didn't say anything, I could see how much sad he was and had lost weight. I often wondered if Jun and Nino ever slept together, they were so close... Maybe...
Nino was a singer, Jun was a mannequin, Aiba owned a bar, Sho was a lawyer and me... I was a dancer. I met them at college and since then, we were the best friends of the world. It was our lives, it was our happiness. Since this day...
****
Kazu
I sighed when my car crashed into the wall, J screaming in joy. I couldn't focus on the game, my mind was too far.
"Hey, Kazu, what's wrong." Jun looked at me worriedly and I shrugged.
"Nothing, just tired." Jun sighed and put his joystick on the ground. He sat behind me and hugged me, putting his chin on my shoulder.
"Liar. I know when you are lying to me." Okay, maybe he knew me very well. "Is it because of this afternoon, dear?"
"No, of course not." I replied, blushing.
"You're a very bad liar, Kaz'." Jun kissed my cheek tenderly.
"No, it's just you know me too well." I chuckled, kissing his hand.
"Is it because of Satoshi?"
I froze. Why could he always read my heart so easily?
"No." I replied stubbornly knowing it was useless to lie to him.
"Tell me, Kazu, I hate seeing you so sad." Jun whispered, sadness resounding in his voice. I lied my head against his shoulder and sighed.
"I wish I could die."
"Oi, don't say stupid things like that!" Jun smacked my head, a bit angry or sad, I didn't know what he was feeling.
"But..."
"You want to help Satoshi even if you love him?"
"How..."
"I know you by heart Kazu, I can see how you are looking at him. I know you love him since This day." Jun whispered and I sighed, he really knew me well.
"Maybe I like him a little." I lied, I was completely crazy about Satoshi.
"Yes, and I'm Snow White." Jun said, sarcastically.
"Really? I always thought you were acting like a princess." I smirked and Jun smacked my head, laughing.
"Baka. I meant, you are crazy about Toshi, it's so obvious."
"Obvious?" I raised my eyebrow in disbelief.
"Kazu~ you were always sleeping with every men who crossed your way, you never had a real boyfriend instead of Mario or sometimes Pikachu and you're so kind with Satoshi. With Aiba and Sho, you're completely different, you like to tease them, to fight with them or bother them but with Satoshi, you're always so kind and soft. The brat I know doesn't exist when Ohchan is here." Jun explained.
"I don't need a psychologist." I replied, blushing at how right he was.
"Why did you propose to help Ohchan with Sho if you love him?"
"Because I want him to be happy." I shrugged, it wasn't completely false, after all, Satoshi's happiness was one of my first priority.
"I'm sure there is something else." Jun frowned.
"Maybe or maybe not, you'll see. Oya my princess Snow White." I smirked and ran in our bedroom, Jun chasing me. He pushed me on the bed and pecked my lips before we fell asleep quickly, hugging each other.
I always needed someone when I was sleeping because of my trauma and when Jun wasn't here, I slept next to Ohchan. Ohno was almost living with me during the week and we shared the same bed. He never asked me why, he knew it was because of my past but I didn't tell him. Jun was the only one who knew the dark parts of my life and I was afraid Ohno would reject me if he knew what happened to me during my childhood. I wanted to protect him and sometimes you have to lie to protect the person you loved. Ohchan made me so weak!
****
Satoshi
I groaned, hearing my phone ringing. Who did dare call me at... I looked at my clock...7 a.m.
"Go to hell." I put my pillow on my head, moaning. But my phone rang again and I grabbed it, angry.
"Satoshi?"
"No, the president of U.S! Of course it's me." I mumbled.
"Get this beautiful fluffy ass of yours to Jun's."
"You must be kidding, Kazu, it's 7 a.m, you know."
"I don't care, do it!" Nino cut the line before I could say anything.
"Shit." I mumbled.
I stood up and took a long shower and then, a big black coffee to wake me up.
When I arrived at Jun's apartment, I blinked, seeing Sho.
"Sho? What are you doing here and where are Kazu and Jun?" I asked, surprised.
"They left two minutes ago, Nino told me they would come back in five minutes." Sho said.
"I see." I nodded, taking my shoes off.
This fucking brat! I'll kill him the next time I'll see him. To start with, I'll tie him up and after I'll kill him slowly!
I sat down on the sofa and looked at Sho shyly.
"So, do you know why Kazu called us at 7 a.m?" I asked and Sho blushed.
"I... I think so, I know..."
"Really?" I raised my eyebrows. Of course I knew why but I couldn't tell Sho 'Hey, Sho, Kazu woke up us at 7 a.m to make me confess to you'. No, I really couldn't say that!
"Yes... I..." Sho stopped, his face as red as a tomato. Why was he blushing like that?
"You?" I asked. Sho sat next to me and took my hand. EH?! He took my hand?! Why?! Wait, what was happening?! EH, where was I? Was I dreaming? Was I in another world?
"You know, Satoshi, we’ve known each other for a long time now."
"Ten years, yes." I nodded with a smile, looking at our linked fingers.
"Ten years, five months and seven weeks." Sho added, blushing even more if it was possible.
"Maybe." I didn't know what he meant, I didn't understand.
"I think I might like you."
"You what?!" I almost screamed, shocked.
"I'm in love with you, Satoshi." Sho repeated, looking away.
EH?! What the fuck? Did Sho just confess to me five seconds earlier?! Did he really say he was in love with me?! EHHH?! Fuck, was it real?! Please, Kami-sama, tell me it was real! If it's a dream, I don't want to wake up! But how... No, it wasn't possible. The man I was in love with for five years just confessed to me?! Ok, keep cool, Satoshi and try to find the good answer. Fuck, why couldn't I reply although my throat wanted to scream "Yattaaaaa"?!
"Hum, ano, you haven't something to say?" Sho asked, making me jump. I completely forgot him. I was deep in my thoughts and didn't answer.
"Me... Me too." I stammered, looking away and blushing deeply.
"Really?!" Sho exclaimed, a big smile on his face.
"Wait, Nino didn't tell you?"
"No. He told me Kei wanted to ask you to date him so, I asked Nino to call you to confess first." Sho smiled softly.
"Oh." I said. This brat... I'll kill him soon!
"Was it false?" Sho raised his eyebrows.
"Hun." I nodded.
Suddenly, Sho put his hand on my cheek and I raised my eyes to look at him. His cheeks were red and when he approached his face, I closed my eyes. My heart almost stopped when my lips met his. His lips were soft and tasted like a strawberry. How many times did I dream about this day? How many times did I dream about us kissing? So many times!
I moaned in pleasure and wrapped my arms around his neck. He tightened his grip around me and slipped his tongue in my mouth. I let him dominate, enjoying the way he was stroking my cheek and my back, sometimes breaking the kiss to whisper many 'I love you' in my ear. I shivered. This moment was so perfect, so beautiful that I thought my heart would explode in the next second.
I climbed on his lap and he kissed my neck, sucking my skin to let his mark. I didn't care if he left red marks, I was his and only his and he was mine. Sho cupped my face and kissed the tip of my nose, his hand pushing away the bangs on my face.
"I love you." Sho whispered, looking at me right in my eyes.
"I love you too." I smiled and he caught my lips again, laying me down on the sofa. He kissed my neck to my chest, opening my shirt and making me moan.
"Sho." I whined, burying my face in his neck.
"I want you to be mine." Sho whispered.
"Make me yours, then." I stroked his face and he put his hand on mine, closing his eyes.
"Hum, you weren't hoping to do it on MY sofa and in MY apartment?!" A voice made us jump and we turned our heads to see Jun and Nino smirking.
"We arrived just at the good time, J. But I wanted to see Sho fucking him!" Nino whined.
"Shut up, brat!" Sho snapped angrily.
I was angry too. It wasn't because of the fact they had stopped Sho from making love to me but the intrusion. They had broken this so magic moment between Sho and me. They had broken our perfect moment. Sho looked super angry and taking my hand, he led me to the door.
"Hey, wait, where are you going?!" Nino exclaimed.
"None of your business, Nino, Satoshi is my boyfriend not yours!" Sho snapped but his face softened when he saw the hurt look on Nino's face. I knew Kazu very well and I could see the tears in his eyes before he looked away.
"I'm sorry." Nino mumbled. I ran toward him and hugged him tightly.
"No, Kazu, we are sorry, I'm sure Sho didn't mean his words." I whispered, patting his head.
"I'm sorry, Nino." Sho apologized, ashamed.
"I forgive you only if you two stay here." Nino smirked, his bratty look coming back.
How did he do to lure us so easily? I looked at Sho who sighed but nodded, giving up, Nino was the best to make you feel guilty, he was a master to get what he wanted. We sat down on the sofa, me on Sho's lap while Nino was between Jun's legs, my friend hugging him from behind as always. Their relationship was very weird, acting like a couple when Jun was dating Aiba for five years now. But I knew Jun would never cheat on Aiba, he was too in love with him and plus, Nino and him were not in love, or they were in love but as two brothers. I knew Kazu had been through lots of hard things but didn't want to tell me it. It hurt to know that but I respected his choice, maybe Nino was afraid I wouldn't understand him or would judge him. I knew he was sharing all his secrets with Jun, after all, they were like two brothers but I didn't know why it hurt me so much not being the person Nino was sharing his life with.
"So, Sho confessed?" Nino asked.
"Yes." I nodded, smiling at my new boyfriend who pecked my lips.
"Does Sho's kisses are good?" Nino smirked.
"Shut up, brat!" Sho blushed deeply making us laugh.
"Sho is a very good kisser." I said and Sho linked our fingers, kissing my temple.
"You'll tell me if he is good in bed too, ne, Ohchan?!" Nino exclaimed making Sho throw him a death look.
"It's none of your business, brat! Find yourself a boyfriend who will fuck you well!" Sho mumbled.
I didn't know if I had dreamt but I thought I had seen sadness and maybe some tears shining in Kazu's eyes when he looked up at us. Why did Nino seem so sad to see us together despite his help to make me confess? I promised myself to be more present for my Kazu, now, he looked so lonely and sad, I wanted to be here for him!
"By the way, where is Masaki?" I asked suddenly.
"He is in Chiba, his mother wanted to see him." Jun smiled sadly. I know he missed his boyfriend, they were a very close couple after all.
"Why didn't you go, then?"
"I wanted to leave him alone with his family, he needed some time with them." Jun said.
"Do you miss him?" I asked.
"Yes." Jun looked away, blushing. It was obvious he missed his boyfriend.
My eyes met Kazu's and he smiled softly with a painful look as if he knew what Jun was feeling, as if he was feeling the same for another person.
****
Kazu
It hurt. It hurt so much. Seeing the person you loved more than anything with one of your best friends was the worst. My chest was aching so much! It was as if my heart was crying too. I knew Satoshi really loved Sho and not me but I was hoping... I was hoping he would see me how I was seeing him. His kind look, his pouty lips, his chubby cheeks, his long black hair like this actor in this famous drama. I loved all these parts of him but my heart was only beating for his person. For me, Satoshi had just qualities that made him twice more beautiful than his appearance. I don't know... It was as if my world was turning around him, as Newton and his gravity's law. I needed him next to me as much as I needed Jun, maybe even more because my heart was beating only for Satoshi. Was it my fate? To love someone who would never love me back. To live for someone who was only seeing me as his best friend. God, why does life was so unfair with me? Why did I have to suffer like that? It was like an illness. Like a cancer that was eating me even more every day. Sometimes, I just wanted to die, to erase this love from my heart, to rip my heart. Why couldn't I be happy like them? Okay, sometimes I was brat, stingy and geek but I had a heart too. I was sensitive even if I hated showing it, I was sentimental even if I didn't say it. These things were reserved for the person I was in love with, it was my secret. I wished I would never go through the things of my past because today, maybe I would be different, maybe Satoshi would love me instead of Sho...
Sometimes, I just wished dying or stealing Ohno's love for Sho. I knew it was horrible and selfish but I couldn't help it, I loved Satoshi too much to be kind. If I could steal his heart, if I could make him love me back...
A/N: Ano, sorry for this weird chapter. There will be a lot of questions turning around Nino's past and his real relationship with Ohchan. In this fic, Jun and Kazu are very very close but as two brothers or twins if you prefer. Sometimes, they will kiss but it's just some pecks as parents kiss their babies, it's just a way to show their deep feelings for the other, Jun isn't cheating on Aiba and Nino is really in love with Ohchan xD I hope you liked this beginning ^^
To be continued...