may (had been) deja vu
A couple days ago I realized I have a clear picture in my mind of my birthday mix - the one I sort of tried to cover up with that sad lovers/elopement OTP collection - because it's largely along the same themes, except with bonus, well, me, the May perigee moon, those Patricks I like so much, and 100% more misguided self-consciousness. Without further ado, the Actual Birthday Mix, with selfies, 'cuz reasons.
- now press repeat -
✘ 20 Dollar Nosebleed
FALL OUT BOY
Who will I be when I wake up next to a stranger
on a passenger plane?
Permanent jet lag, please take be back
✘ Dammit (Blink-182 Acoustic Cover)
SYSTEM OF A DOWN
And it'll happen once again, you'll turn to a friend
Someone that understands, sees through the master plan
But everybody's gone, and you've been there for too long,
To face this on your own
Well, I guess this is growing up
✘ Therapy
ALL TIME LOW
Give me therapy, I'm a walking travesty
But I'm smiling at everything
Arrogant boy, love yourself so no one has to
✘ Loose Leaves
BRIGHT EYES
Time's not poison, but once you drink it all you'll die
so let's just sip it real slow, yeah, we can nurse it all night
Try to believe that once it's gone
We'll pour another round and come back to life
Life's a slippery slope, regret's the steepest hill
Hope for the best, plan for the worst and
maybe wind up somewhere in the middle
✘ Candles
DAUGHTER
Blow out all the candles, blow out all the candles
You're too old to be so shy, he says to me, so I stay the night
Just a young heart confusing my mind
So we're both in silence, wide-eyed, like we're in a crime scene
Well I have brittle bones, it seems
I bite my tongue and torch my dreams
Have a little voice to speak with
And a mind of thoughts and secrecy
Things cannot be reversed, we learn from the times we are cursed
✘ Pigeon Song
PATRICK WOLF
I have learnt how it goes
What you wait for never shows
And what you least wanted holds you down
like a stone, just like a stone
✘ Your Worldview Gets Me Down
THE DEBUTANTE HOUR
Lord, I can’t help it, I feel so unnecessary
Lord, I’m redundant and worry that one day I’ll drown
Well, I’m not the Lord and you didn’t ask my opinion,
But I gotta say, honey, your worldview gets me down
✘ Dance Miserable
PATRICK STUMP
It's as bad as I remember and it's only getting worse
It only gets better when it hurts
But I believe in something here on earth
Just dance like you're disappointed in the world
✘ Falling
HAIM
They keep saying:
Don’t stop, no one’s ever enough
I’ll never look up, never give up
And if it gets rough, it’s time to get rough
Step into the fire feeling higher than the truth
I can feel the heat but I’m not burning
✘ Aside
THE WEAKERTHANS
Rely a bit to heavily on alcohol and irony,
Get clobbered on by courtesy,
In love with love, and lousy poetry
And I'm leaning on this broken fence
Between Past and Present tense
And I'm losing all those stupid games
That I swore I'd never play.
But it almost feels okay
✘ I Go to the Barn Because I Like The
BAND OF HORSES
Well I'd like to think
I'm the mess you'd wear with pride
Like some empty dress
On the bed you've laid out for tonight
Maybe I'll tell you sometime
✘ Moonlight
GEORGE BARNETT
Lay me in my woods, set me in my ways
Oh, the tide is turning, oh, the stars are burning down, down
Keep you in my thoughts, winter is in the trees
Mum, I feel so lonely, mum, my tears are only mine
You say it never ends, asking for wasteland answers
You’re waiting for the friends, but they ring up and cancel
I was once like you
✘ Bel Air
LANA DEL REY
Roses, Bel Air, take me there
I've been waiting to meet you
Grenadine, sunshine, can you break this heart of mine?
Darling, I'm waiting to greet you
✘ I Am Disappeared
FRANK TURNER
I keep having dreams of things I need to do
Of waking up and not following through
It feels like I haven’t slept at all
And on the worst days
When it feels like life weighs ten thousand tonnes
I sleep with my passport
One eye on the back door
So I can always run
I can get up, shower in half an hour
I’d be gone
BONUS SUPER SAD SOLO JON WALKER
Alone
- now press repeat -
✘ 20 Dollar Nosebleed
FALL OUT BOY
Who will I be when I wake up next to a stranger
on a passenger plane?
Permanent jet lag, please take be back
✘ Dammit (Blink-182 Acoustic Cover)
SYSTEM OF A DOWN
And it'll happen once again, you'll turn to a friend
Someone that understands, sees through the master plan
But everybody's gone, and you've been there for too long,
To face this on your own
Well, I guess this is growing up
✘ Therapy
ALL TIME LOW
Give me therapy, I'm a walking travesty
But I'm smiling at everything
Arrogant boy, love yourself so no one has to
✘ Loose Leaves
BRIGHT EYES
Time's not poison, but once you drink it all you'll die
so let's just sip it real slow, yeah, we can nurse it all night
Try to believe that once it's gone
We'll pour another round and come back to life
Life's a slippery slope, regret's the steepest hill
Hope for the best, plan for the worst and
maybe wind up somewhere in the middle
✘ Candles
DAUGHTER
Blow out all the candles, blow out all the candles
You're too old to be so shy, he says to me, so I stay the night
Just a young heart confusing my mind
So we're both in silence, wide-eyed, like we're in a crime scene
Well I have brittle bones, it seems
I bite my tongue and torch my dreams
Have a little voice to speak with
And a mind of thoughts and secrecy
Things cannot be reversed, we learn from the times we are cursed
✘ Pigeon Song
PATRICK WOLF
I have learnt how it goes
What you wait for never shows
And what you least wanted holds you down
like a stone, just like a stone
✘ Your Worldview Gets Me Down
THE DEBUTANTE HOUR
Lord, I can’t help it, I feel so unnecessary
Lord, I’m redundant and worry that one day I’ll drown
Well, I’m not the Lord and you didn’t ask my opinion,
But I gotta say, honey, your worldview gets me down
✘ Dance Miserable
PATRICK STUMP
It's as bad as I remember and it's only getting worse
It only gets better when it hurts
But I believe in something here on earth
Just dance like you're disappointed in the world
✘ Falling
HAIM
They keep saying:
Don’t stop, no one’s ever enough
I’ll never look up, never give up
And if it gets rough, it’s time to get rough
Step into the fire feeling higher than the truth
I can feel the heat but I’m not burning
✘ Aside
THE WEAKERTHANS
Rely a bit to heavily on alcohol and irony,
Get clobbered on by courtesy,
In love with love, and lousy poetry
And I'm leaning on this broken fence
Between Past and Present tense
And I'm losing all those stupid games
That I swore I'd never play.
But it almost feels okay
✘ I Go to the Barn Because I Like The
BAND OF HORSES
Well I'd like to think
I'm the mess you'd wear with pride
Like some empty dress
On the bed you've laid out for tonight
Maybe I'll tell you sometime
✘ Moonlight
GEORGE BARNETT
Lay me in my woods, set me in my ways
Oh, the tide is turning, oh, the stars are burning down, down
Keep you in my thoughts, winter is in the trees
Mum, I feel so lonely, mum, my tears are only mine
You say it never ends, asking for wasteland answers
You’re waiting for the friends, but they ring up and cancel
I was once like you
✘ Bel Air
LANA DEL REY
Roses, Bel Air, take me there
I've been waiting to meet you
Grenadine, sunshine, can you break this heart of mine?
Darling, I'm waiting to greet you
✘ I Am Disappeared
FRANK TURNER
I keep having dreams of things I need to do
Of waking up and not following through
It feels like I haven’t slept at all
And on the worst days
When it feels like life weighs ten thousand tonnes
I sleep with my passport
One eye on the back door
So I can always run
I can get up, shower in half an hour
I’d be gone
BONUS SUPER SAD SOLO JON WALKER
Alone