"I can't really say I know her at all except to say it's a sure fact that she wants me to be struck by lightning. I didn't even do anything but breathe! Where's the justice in that, huh?" he shook his head as he followed Ewan in, making a direct beeline for the counter for his pack of cigarettes.
After paying, he turned around to say something but stopped short, extremely amused at the fact that Ewan McGregor, the man who denounced all things Star Wars, was looking through something with just that.
"Hey," he waved off, trying to get his attention, "want anything while we're here?"
Frowning down at the magazine, he tilted his head to the side to get a better look at the included fold out poster. An upsetting shiver ran down his spine so he set the magazine back down before addressing Jonathan, "Well, I can name a few others she'd like to see six feet under as well, so I wouldn't feel so bad, you know?"
Roaming the store for a moment he bit his lip in thought and picked up a pack of minty-fresh Orbit, holding it up for Jonathan's approval. "You know, for the monster snog at the end there."
Jonathan didn’t miss a beat. "Aww, Ewan. You know I'd snog you without the benefit of a stick of gum," he said, grinning wide as he tore the plastic off the pack, his hands shaking from slight nicotine withdrawal. "In fact-" he looked up as he casually slipped a cigarette up to his mouth, letting it hang from his lip as he fished around in his pocket for his lighter.
Just as he was about to tease him more, he was distracted by a loud noise, followed by several raised voices shouting in an indecipherable language. Losing his previous train of thought, he took his cigarette back in his fingers. "Hang on," he said, moving to the doorway of the shop, leaning to the side a bit to get a better view, then turning back to frantically gesture Ewan to take a look. "Holy hell, McGregor. What do you make of that?" He pointed at the largest one of the bunch, "Oi, look at that one, he hits like a girl. He'll never win at that rate."
Puckering his lips he nodded thoughtfully, "Well, yeah, let us not forget Finland." Considering adding commentary about the event, he instead brushed off the memory and turned his attention toward the shouting. Shuffling over to stand beside Jonathan, his brow arched in a questioning manner, "Dunno, shall we have a closer look then?"
Sweeping past Jonathan to view the continuing skirmish, Ewan jumped back when the girly hitter was practically flung at his feet, "Bloody fuck!" Looking back he nodded for him to get on, "I can't be around this! The director will have my bollocks should I give them bad press!"
"You! I'm the one with my arse sticking out here, okay! Who would you tell..." Squeezing his eyes shut, he paused, moving away from the poking, "What?! I have not just been shot!" Turning around in circles again to try to see what Jonathan was talking about, he let out a sharp groan, "Yarr, whatever it is it is killing me, alright?"
Limping over to the kerb, Ewan totally ignored Jonathan who was now doubled over with laughter yet again. Muttering for him to shut his gob, he waved over a passing taxi and opened the door, tentatively sliding inside. He favoured his right side heavily, glowering back at Jonathan, "You wank I'm getting myself to fucking hospital, either stay there and be a toss or get the fuck in."
Was he mental? Of course Jonathan was going with. It wasn't even a decision. "Don't get all crazy on me, Ewan," he grinned as he climbed in after, slamming the door shut and giving directions to the nearest hospital. Or actually, any hospital would do.
He turned to him, valiantly trying to bite back the snicker that threatened to escape, but it was futile. Only Ewan would get a pellet in the arse from a bloody pack of gum. "Besides. What sort of manpanion-backup would I be if I didn't come along? Have to make sure everything's alright and in working order or I'm pretty sure Michelle would eat my head."
Suddenly remembering Michelle, the bb in his ass wasn't the only thing in pain, "Ooh God. Don't tell her, alright? Please don't? I'll never hear the bloody end of it if she catches word of this absolute travesty. I should sue! This is sue worth, innit? I should totally sue!"
When he taxi hit a rather large pothole, Ewan let out a high pitched yelp, "WATCH IT YOU CRAP TOSS! I'M IN PAIN HERE!" Hitting the back of the drivers seat he winced, "God dammit! Why couldn't this happen to you, eh? Nothing other than foaming pit bulls ever happens to you!"
“Oi, I get household tools thrown at my head and that's not much better than a foaming pit bull," he laughed. "Anyway, it’s about fucking time something happened to you,” he crowed, his laughter just constant at this point. He was helpless and couldn’t stop no matter how he tried to take deep breaths and calm the hell down, because as soon as he thought he had everything under control, he’d look at how Ewan was sitting on one side of his arse and he would just bust out again. All that could be heard was his cackling and Ewan’s whinging the rest of the ride.
As soon as they pulled up in front of the entrance marked “Casualty,” Jonathan threw some bills at the driver before sliding out after Ewan. He followed close just in case he needed help, but Jonathan knew that an offer at this point would not only be unwelcome, but Ewan would probably take a swing at him too for all his sorta-good intentions.
Comments 24
After paying, he turned around to say something but stopped short, extremely amused at the fact that Ewan McGregor, the man who denounced all things Star Wars, was looking through something with just that.
"Hey," he waved off, trying to get his attention, "want anything while we're here?"
Reply
Roaming the store for a moment he bit his lip in thought and picked up a pack of minty-fresh Orbit, holding it up for Jonathan's approval. "You know, for the monster snog at the end there."
Reply
Just as he was about to tease him more, he was distracted by a loud noise, followed by several raised voices shouting in an indecipherable language. Losing his previous train of thought, he took his cigarette back in his fingers. "Hang on," he said, moving to the doorway of the shop, leaning to the side a bit to get a better view, then turning back to frantically gesture Ewan to take a look. "Holy hell, McGregor. What do you make of that?" He pointed at the largest one of the bunch, "Oi, look at that one, he hits like a girl. He'll never win at that rate."
Reply
Sweeping past Jonathan to view the continuing skirmish, Ewan jumped back when the girly hitter was practically flung at his feet, "Bloody fuck!" Looking back he nodded for him to get on, "I can't be around this! The director will have my bollocks should I give them bad press!"
Reply
Limping over to the kerb, Ewan totally ignored Jonathan who was now doubled over with laughter yet again. Muttering for him to shut his gob, he waved over a passing taxi and opened the door, tentatively sliding inside. He favoured his right side heavily, glowering back at Jonathan, "You wank I'm getting myself to fucking hospital, either stay there and be a toss or get the fuck in."
Reply
He turned to him, valiantly trying to bite back the snicker that threatened to escape, but it was futile. Only Ewan would get a pellet in the arse from a bloody pack of gum. "Besides. What sort of manpanion-backup would I be if I didn't come along? Have to make sure everything's alright and in working order or I'm pretty sure Michelle would eat my head."
Reply
When he taxi hit a rather large pothole, Ewan let out a high pitched yelp, "WATCH IT YOU CRAP TOSS! I'M IN PAIN HERE!" Hitting the back of the drivers seat he winced, "God dammit! Why couldn't this happen to you, eh? Nothing other than foaming pit bulls ever happens to you!"
Reply
As soon as they pulled up in front of the entrance marked “Casualty,” Jonathan threw some bills at the driver before sliding out after Ewan. He followed close just in case he needed help, but Jonathan knew that an offer at this point would not only be unwelcome, but Ewan would probably take a swing at him too for all his sorta-good intentions.
Reply
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