You're not supposed to share these things, right?
Papa.
I hear what you're asking me to do, but my "Yes" isn't on the table.
How, then, can I begin to ask of you something I already have no control over?
Even still, as I struggle through, I recognize that any change in these two - or anyone - isn't something I can "make happen."
At the very least, help me to surrender that you. I never have and never will be CEO of the universe, therefore I resign as CEO of the universe.
Amongst all this, I can't thank you enough for the joy you continue to give me, much less why you do... well, that's not quite true. You do it for your glory, don't you? Thank you, Papa, for Jesus and your greatness.
May my actions mimic my positive thoughts and efforts that come from you and the desire to know you more, and the decisions I make show the fervor with which I want to know you more.
Let me know if there's anything I can do for you, okay? I'm not the best of the bunch, but goodness knows if I need help after all the blessings I have, others have to need some, too.