Crisis Averted, for the H/C Bingo prompt 'Sex Pollen'
Title: Crisis Averted
Fandom: Torchwood
Rating: PG
Characters/pairings: Jack/Ianto, team
Warnings (including spoilers): None
Wordcount: 626 words
Summary: Jack makes a mistake. Ianto does not think it’s funny. For the ‘Sex pollen’ square of my hc_bingo. Part 10 of my ongoing Playtime series.
[*]
Jack thinks it was hilarious. Ianto- staring doggedly out at the Hub, cheeks burning, arms crossed tightly enough to wrinkle his suit- does not.
It’s completely Jack’s fault. He told Gwen to fetch a container he’d been examining for today’s case, forgetting that she hadn’t seen it. So of course, by Sod’s Law, she grabbed the wrong one.
...
“Here Jack, but I think it’s stuck,” she says, voice straining with the effort of pulling the top off the inconspicuous gray tube.
Jack turns around from Tosh’s desk, where they’re all watching a suspect on the CCTV, and shouts. “Gwen, don’t!”
...
Ianto buries his face in his hands. Jack sees this and snorts, then chokes on the water he was drinking to try and calm himself down.
...
Gwen looks up in surprise- just enough surprise that she manages to pop the cover off the tube. Yellow powder explodes out of the tube as her arm jerks and swirls through the air to settle over all five of them.
Owen’s eyes are wide. “Jack?” he says slowly. “What was in there?”
...
“I don’t see how this isn’t funny!” Jack is still laughing. Ianto glares at him.
...
Jack raises his eyebrows. “Well, it’s called-”
“Ahh, we don’t need to go into that,” Ianto interrupts. He can feel his face starting to flush and isn’t sure if it’s from the pollen or the embarrassment. “What’s important is that we have an antidote.” He rushes into Jack’s room and retrieves five syringes from the small box in one of Jack’s bottom drawers.
“Nobody move,” Ianto hears Jack order the others. “This isn’t dangerous, but it can have some- uh, side effects.”
“What type of side effects, Jack?”
“Don’t worry about it,” Ianto tells Tosh as he returns to the others. He hands the antidote over to Owen- he and Jack have injected themselves, but if you have a doctor on hand, why not use him? Oh, that’s not the sort of thought he needs right now.
“You’ll feel a little-” Owen stops and clears his throat, hands shaking slightly as he pats the vein in Gwen’s elbow to draw it to the surface. She’s staring at him, eyes slightly darker than usual, unconsciously wetting her lips. Ianto steps on Jack’s foot when he sees him staring.
“Give me those,” Ianto grumbles, snatching two of the syringes from Owen and unceremoniously- but carefully, even if this is all Jack’s fault- injects the other man with the antidote.
“Hey!”
Ianto injects himself and glares. “Yes, sir?”
It’s not often that Ianto can get that look of ‘Oh shit’ during work hours, so he appreciates it very much.
“I suggest you all shower and put on a change of clothes,” Ianto says to the room at large while Owen finishes the last injection- his own. “And I’ll clean up… this,” he finishes rather lamely, gesturing at the yellow dust coating the entire immediate area.
“I can help!” Jack offers, eyes wide and innocent.
Ianto glares hard enough to break diamond.
...
“You know,” Jack pokes him in the thigh. Ianto pivots on Jack’s desk to shifts his legs away, and Jack scowls. “You shouldn’t be so mad at me. If we’d used the sex pollen recently the cap probably would have come off more easily and it wouldn‘t have spilled.”
Ianto begins to make a retort, and then considers. “I think… you may have a point, sir,” he says thoughtfully. “And we don’t want this to happen again, do we?”
Jack recognizes the game and gives Ianto a seductive look. “Certainly not,” he replies, voice lowering and becoming smooth as he stands up from his seat. Then the image falters- he cocks his head slightly. “Although-”
“Shut up and kiss me,” Ianto demands.
Jack complies.
My H/C Bingo Card