It's excellent. Haiku can often seem very forced...this doesn't. It's flow is very natural.
Somewhere, I have a bunch of poetry I wrote during high school...if you'd like an example of BAD poetry I'll find them and put them up. I might even have the one you read in the V-show. Scary.
I have plenty of 'bad' poetry from high school (and later!) myself. Then again, if you are honestly expressing yourself, who gives a damn what the critics (especially the inner critic) have to say....
As far as V-show.
Shut up.
I was (and still feel) honored that you chose me to read that poem. It was honest and raw and said something that desperately needed to be said.
I don't know if I ever told you, but I had someone (I don't remember who, but someone who normally wouldn't give me the time of day and moved in different social circles than I, not to mention being in a different grade....get it? this matters!) come up to me after one of the performances and tell me that they had gotten goosebumps and it had changed their perspective.
Your poem mattered. To me, and to AT LEAST that one person. That's what writing should do, isn't it?
Re: " - this is the first poem I've written in years....."medeineMay 19 2008, 21:18:02 UTC
lololol.....
Fair enough!
I've been toying with some ideas, and was slightly nervous about trying to write anything. Then I got a book out from the library to read to my kids called "Dogku" which is about a puppy, with each page written as a haiku.
Seemed like a relatively non-threatening (and more importantly SHORT) form for me to play with for my newly-maiden voyage. :D
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is there something missing from your comment?
or am I just not capable of grokking what you're saying? :D
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grokked
and thank you
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I had hoped for "not bad" - "lovely" is so much better! :D
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Somewhere, I have a bunch of poetry I wrote during high school...if you'd like an example of BAD poetry I'll find them and put them up.
I might even have the one you read in the V-show. Scary.
Reply
As far as V-show.
Shut up.
I was (and still feel) honored that you chose me to read that poem. It was honest and raw and said something that desperately needed to be said.
I don't know if I ever told you, but I had someone (I don't remember who, but someone who normally wouldn't give me the time of day and moved in different social circles than I, not to mention being in a different grade....get it? this matters!)
come up to me after one of the performances and tell me that they had gotten goosebumps and it had changed their perspective.
Your poem mattered. To me, and to AT LEAST that one person. That's what writing should do, isn't it?
Hugs..........and thank you.
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wouldn't have known if u wouldn't have told me.
It's beautiful.
Welcome back.
And now, some goof...
Five is a number
Seven is a number too
Haiku recipe
Carry on...
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Fair enough!
I've been toying with some ideas, and was slightly nervous about trying to write anything. Then I got a book out from the library to read to my kids called "Dogku" which is about a puppy, with each page written as a haiku.
Seemed like a relatively non-threatening (and more importantly SHORT) form for me to play with for my newly-maiden voyage. :D
Thank you for your kind words...
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